38.
#You’re No Different
What’s the point of discussing whether one can have sex or not when you’ve never even liked someone, let alone dated? It was the same in 10th grade. Hayun seemed to get sensitive whenever it involved relationships with the opposite sex.
“At the very least, you should know how to use contraception. We can’t have any accidents resulting in a child.”
“What nonsense…!”
Dawoon was about to burst out in anger when he suddenly realized something that left him speechless. A child born from an accident. That was him. If his father hadn’t committed adultery with his mother, or if they had at least used proper contraception during the affair so that he wasn’t conceived, his mother wouldn’t have become the lady of the Haedo Group, and she wouldn’t have died with his father later on.
Suddenly, Hayun’s gaze looking down at him felt ice-cold. Although he wasn’t saying it directly, it felt like he was criticizing that another child like Dawoon shouldn’t be born.
Dawoon’s eyes, locked with Hayun’s, wavered and then dropped to the floor. He began to understand why Hayun was so sharp when it came to relationships with the opposite sex.
To avoid repeating the same mistake.
Thinking that way, everything made sense.
“You suddenly went quiet. Guess something hit home.”
Hayun misunderstood Dawoon’s silence. Dawoon squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath. He wanted to convince Hayun that what he was worried about wouldn’t happen, but he didn’t know how to broach the subject.
“Should I just teach you how to sleep with a woman properly?”
While Dawoon was pondering, Hayun kept steering the conversation in a different direction.
“You shouldn’t be embarrassed because you don’t know how to do it.”
“Hyung!”
Dawoon felt his chest tighten at the thought of saying such things to someone who had no interest at all. When Dawoon looked up after calling out to Hayun, he felt his mouth go dry at the intense gaze fixed on him. It wasn’t simply cold.
It felt like he was about to be devoured.
For the first time, Hayun felt like a massive predator. Dawoon had heard relatives gossiping that grandfather had chosen Hayun as the successor instead of his aunt and uncle because of his innate charisma and ability to overwhelm others, but this was the first time he truly felt it.
“I’ll set you up with some women. Women who won’t cause any trouble. You’re an adult now, so it wouldn’t hurt to learn. Even if you don’t need it right now, you have desires too, so it’ll be useful someday.”
Hayun’s words felt like a hammer blow to the back of Dawoon’s head. It was shocking to hear such words from Hayun’s mouth, and the thought that Hayun might have gone through this himself was equally shocking.
“Did you… do this too?”
Dawoon asked, unable to even blink from the shock. Hayun tilted his head and seemed to understand the question a beat later, making an “Ah” sound. But that was all. He neither denied nor confirmed it.
“Don’t tell me father did this to you too, like you’re doing now?”
Even though he thought it was absurd, Hayun’s behavior was so shocking that he couldn’t think straight.
“What do you think?”
Again, Hayun didn’t give a clear answer. He smiled faintly and deflected the question.
I don’t want to believe father was that kind of person.
Dawoon’s inner thoughts were clearly visible on his face. Seeing how shaken he was, unable to hide his thoughts, Hayun smirked.
The father Dawoon remembered and the father Hayun remembered were quite different. To Dawoon, father was just a kind and good person. A good father who always hugged Dawoon and smiled, bringing large gifts on his birthday.
To Hayun, father was a colder, more calculating and meticulous person. He was always busy with work, perfect at the company but indifferent at home. He couldn’t even remember Hayun’s birthday properly each year, and even brought his mistress and their child on one of those birthdays. Of course, Dawoon was a “gift” to Hayun, so he never resented him.
Dawoon’s eyes wavered endlessly as he looked at Hayun. Not getting a clear answer, he seemed to be imagining all sorts of things.
“…This is upsetting.”
Dawoon finally frowned deeply and turned his head away. Understanding immediately what he found upsetting, Hayun’s lips curled up in a smirk.
Just for that much. If he knew what kind of desires were residing inside himself, he’d be even more shocked.
“Even if it upsets you, it’s something everyone does. It’s instinct.”
As Hayun leaned in close and spoke in a low voice, Dawoon’s expression twisted even more. Dawoon showed aversion to the emotion of love, dating, and any related acts of affection to the point of seeming obsessive-compulsive.
Knowing this, he had left it alone, and now knowing this, he was trying to push forward.
“You’re no different.”
When Hayun grabbed Dawoon’s face and forced him to look at him, Dawoon tried to shake off his hand. But Hayun was quicker in grabbing his wrist. When Dawoon tried to push away with his other hand, that one was caught too.
With both arms caught and unable to move, Dawoon looked up at Hayun with wide eyes.
“Unfortunately, men are weak to stimulation.”
Hayun leaned down and whispered in his ear. The breath tickled, but a chilling sensation ran up his spine, making his shoulders unconsciously hunch.
“Hyung, hands…!”
Just as he was about to ask Hayun to let go, Hayun pushed with force. Surprised at how easily his body was pushed back, Dawoon was taken aback. Hayun pushed until Dawoon’s back hit the wall, then pinned both of Dawoon’s wrists above his head with one hand. Dawoon tried to use force to break free, but he couldn’t overcome the strength of Hayun’s single hand. As he realized he couldn’t escape no matter what he did, anxiety began to set in.
Before he could grasp what situation this was or what was happening, Hayun’s other hand brushed against his waist. It was just a light touch, but his body curled in on itself and his eyes grew even wider.
Danger. A loud warning alarm rang in his head.
“Hyung…!”
He tried to say stop joking around, but he couldn’t continue. Because he felt the hand that had passed his waist now touching between his thighs.
“What are you doing!”
He cried out, startled, but Hayun didn’t seem to be listening. When Hayun’s hand pressed firmly on his center, a high-pitched gasp escaped without his control.
“Shh.”
Hayun’s breath brushed his ear, making even his hair stand on end.
“There’s nothing to be afraid of. It’s okay.”
The words “it’s okay” were not comforting at all. Hayun’s words and actions were completely at odds. His voice was still gentle and kind, but the hand pressing below was not gentle at all.
“Take… your hand away.”
He tried to close his legs, but that wasn’t easy either. At some point, Hayun had pushed one of his thighs between Dawoon’s legs.
“Your body says differently.”
Dawoon flinched at his words. Separate from his shock and bewilderment, blood was rushing downwards. He was even more alarmed at the state of his own body. Why…? His head ached from the confusion.
Was this just teasing? If so, wasn’t it going too far?
No reason he could think of provided a clear explanation for Hayun’s behavior.
“I’ll take care of it for you, so relax.”
Take care of it? What? His mind couldn’t keep up with the situation that had already exceeded its limits. Before he could respond, he felt his sweatpants being pulled down.
“Hyung!”
He cried out in panic, but with both hands tightly restrained, he could do nothing. He tried twisting his waist, but trapped between the wall and Hayun, it was a meaningless struggle. Until his pants and underwear were pulled down together, all he could do was repeatedly call out to Hayun.
Hayun’s long fingers wrapped around his half-swollen dick. Enveloped in hot warmth, his vision blurred. He had never touched himself this way, let alone anyone else. Even when his friends talked about watching porn and masturbating, he had no interest in that sort of thing at all.
The pressure alone made it hard to breathe, but Hayun’s hand began to move up and down slowly, stimulating him. Heat rushed downwards in an instant. The chilling sensation that had run up his spine reached his brain, making his head fuzzy.
“Wait, please, hyung…”
As the sensation became increasingly dizzying, he didn’t even know what words were coming out of his mouth. All his nerves seemed to be concentrating on that one spot. He was scared that if this continued, he would be completely swallowed up by this unknown sensation.
He tried to divert his attention to somewhere other than his center, but it was impossible. As Hayun’s hand gradually sped up, his vision began to turn white. Feeling like something was about to come out, he gritted his teeth. If this continued, it felt like the point of no return.
“Hyung, stop, ugh.”
As he shook his head, resisting the unfamiliar sensation, he heard a gentle voice calling, “Dawoon-ah.” Habitually raising his eyes to look at Hayun, he saw Hayun’s face smiling quietly. The disconnect between what he was doing and his smile made Dawoon dizzy.
Staring blankly at Hayun’s face slowly approaching, he suddenly came to his senses. Their lips were about to meet.
What… are you trying to do?
He jerked his head away, shocked as if his brain had been pierced. In that moment, he heard Hayun chuckle. Before he could wonder if he had heard wrong, he felt breath on his neck. Soon, the breath changed to a soft and warm sensation.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
