For You 105

#105

Now Persis seemed to have no intention of hiding as he spun me around to face him. I looked at Persis and heaved a deep sigh.

“Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Of course I am, being alone with Ana like this. How could I not enjoy it?”

Giggling, Persis skillfully guided my body. This time it was an unknown step that no one had taught me, but I surrendered my body to Persis with a come-what-may attitude. Even without a single note of music, Persis’s and my footsteps were nothing short of cheerful.

What were we doing, the two of us in the moonlight? Before I knew it, I was laughing out loud along with Persis. It was an embarrassing sight that might invite pointing fingers if anyone saw us, but let them look if they wanted. At this moment, I didn’t want to let go of Persis’s hand.

After spinning around many times, Persis released one of my hands and stepped back, bowing his head in greeting. At this greeting, like something one would do at a ball, I couldn’t help but laugh loudly. Only after laughing so hard that tears almost came to my eyes could I step back and return the greeting like Persis had.

Only when the laughter had somewhat subsided could I open my mouth.

“Thank you.”

Persis must have known I was struggling. He probably knew better than anyone. That’s why he came here and played this prank.

“Are you feeling a bit better?”

“Yes. Much better.”

“Then from tomorrow, will our Ana have some time?”

I just looked at Persis without saying anything.

“Well, it was somewhat fun to hear what kind of appointment Ana had today, but I wasn’t too pleased that my time with Ana was reduced.”

I released Persis’s hand that I had still been holding.

“Persis.”

“Yes?”

I wish for your happiness. I prayed and prayed that he would find a proper ending with the person he loves in a place where he could be himself. Persis, whom I had watched since childhood, had now become as important to me as Iria.

So my current actions were right. What was wrong was me needlessly inserting myself between the two. Of course, I always avoided being between them. Though things didn’t always go as planned, I thought I had tried my best.

In conclusion, that effort wasn’t enough.

“I’ll probably continue to be busy for a while.”

“…Why?”

“The exam is coming up soon. There’s a lot to prepare… and I haven’t been able to concentrate properly lately due to various issues. As a young master who’s even been called a genius, if my exam results turn out poorly, who knows what rumors might spread. I can’t bring shame to the Duke’s face, can I?”

Persis listened to me silently and then let out a defeated sigh.

“So it’s ‘that’ this time. Fine, I understand. You’re right. It certainly has been a situation that’s difficult to concentrate in. For both you and me.”

Though I should have been glad that Persis was accepting my words, it felt uncomfortable, like a thorn caught in my throat.

“I’ll allow it. But in return, Ana.”

Persis, who had been standing apart, took a step toward me. Then he brushed back my hair that had stuck to my cheek due to slight perspiration. Though it was the warmth I had felt until just now, was it because we had separated briefly? I unconsciously shrunk back. It felt like a tickling sensation was spreading from where Persis’s fingertips had touched.

“After it’s all over, you’ll give me your time. Understood?”

What did it mean to give my time to Persis? I didn’t know, but I could only nod as if enchanted. Only then did Persis step away from me, as if satisfied. I felt a slight regret at the warmth no longer felt on my cheek.

“Shall we go then? We should head back soon. Or would you like to stay with me a bit longer?”

“No. Let’s go in.”

I hastily spoke and turned my back to him. I thought I heard Persis’s soft laughter from behind, but I’m not sure. Perhaps I was hearing things because I was dizzy. Yes, all of this might have been a midsummer night’s dream.

But Persis’s light footsteps following behind me echoed in my ears, whispering that everything was real. Truly, both in the past and now, I could never win against Persis.

* * *

Perhaps because of the rapidly approaching exams, silence often flowed through the school. Even nobles couldn’t escape exams. Moreover, wasn’t this the exam that concluded the semester? It was natural for students to be on edge.

After that night, Persis didn’t approach me to ask about eating together or going somewhere. Though it was the situation I had wanted, now that Persis wasn’t coming to me, I felt a bit disappointed. People are truly puzzling creatures.

The exam formats were mostly practical or written tests. However, among them, there were some subjects that were substituted with assignments, attitude evaluations, or pop quizzes. And this class was one of such types. Within the class time, we needed to form pairs with other students and write a report.

I thought I could pair with whoever was left, but because of someone who came rushing to me as soon as the teacher announced the assignment, other students couldn’t even approach me.

“Iria.”

In the end, unable to find a chance to refuse, I had no choice but to pair with Iria. Since it was an assignment related to the exam, I needed to concentrate, but Iria wouldn’t take her eyes off me.

If Iria was perceptive, she would have noticed that I had been deliberately avoiding her. That’s why she probably rushed to me as soon as she heard about the team assignment.

“Shouldn’t we start soon?”

“Andelion.”

Iria’s voice calling me seemed to sound a bit lower. It seemed that my behavior had hurt Iria’s feelings quite a bit. I hadn’t intended that.

“Are you angry with me?”

“Pardon?”

“If not that, there’s no reason for Andelion to suddenly avoid me.”

I shook my head in surprise. I hadn’t expected her to think that far. Though we were in a tight situation where we needed to finish the assignment within the time limit, that wasn’t the important thing right now. First, I needed to correct the thoughts Iria was having.

“There’s no way I could be angry with you, Iria.”

If anyone’s at fault, it’s me. Iria could never do anything wrong to me, even if she were reborn. Somehow, it seemed like I heard this kind of talk every time I tried to distance myself from Iria, which made me feel uneasy. Though I had always told her it wasn’t the case…

Suddenly, I recalled that we had had this conversation several times. Iria couldn’t have been unaware of that fact. Whenever I distanced myself from her, feeling that I was getting too involved, she would worriedly ask if there was something that upset me. Each time, I assured her that was absolutely not the case, and we would return to our previous relationship.

When I raised my head and our eyes met, a playful expression formed over Iria’s worried face.

“Ah, I’ve been caught.”

“Iria.”

“No, since Andelion has been avoiding me again lately, I was wondering what the matter was this time.”

It was true that I had been avoiding Iria. Since I had nothing to say about that part, I glanced at Iria. Iria looked at me quietly, waiting for me to speak.

If someone distanced themselves this frequently, it would be reasonable to lose affection or cut ties, but Iria asked me first and waited for my answer.

Even if I spoke honestly, my words wouldn’t even serve as an excuse. I hoped that Persis and Iria would become closer. I couldn’t say that the more I was present, the more things happened that deviated from the original story, seemingly endangering Iria.

“Is it because of what happened before?”

As soon as I heard Iria’s words, I knew exactly what she was referring to. She was talking about the suspicious individuals we had encountered on the way back to the dormitory. Indeed, I had been avoiding Persis and Iria since then, so it was reasonable for her to think it was because of that incident.

Having avoided Iria, there was a question I wanted to ask but couldn’t.

“Are you… alright?”

“Hm?”

I knew one shouldn’t answer a question with another question, but this was something I really wanted to ask. I wanted to know if there had been any threats to Iria’s safety since that day. Things I didn’t know were happening around Iria. In the original story I knew, Iria wasn’t in such danger. But the incident had already occurred, and Iria had to deal with the intruder with her own hands.

“Ah, I’m fine. There have been no such attacks since then.”

As soon as Iria finished speaking, a sigh of relief reflexively escaped me. It seems Iria’s situation had remained a significant burden within me, more than I had thought. Perhaps Iria found herself in such a situation because of me. The variable that was me, like the fluttering of a small butterfly’s wings, was gradually changing the world.

“So that’s what was bothering you?”

“I didn’t want Iria to be in danger.”

“Yes. You were worried about me. Thank you. But Andelion.”

I looked up at Iria’s call.

“What correlation is there between me being in danger and you avoiding me?”