Was it the aftermath of a long and tiresome journey? Kessler’s energy had noticeably dropped.
If I could shift into human form, at least we might’ve shared some conversation during this dull, dragging trip. All we did was eat and sleep, eat and lie around. This was the age where I should’ve been brimming with activity, yet the only exercise I got was lazily prowling across the floor of the empty train. Even my belly had grown pudgy.
Still, out of habit, I finished my walk and jumped onto Kessler’s lap. He turned me over in his arms and began to rub my belly fat.
‘I just can’t figure it out.’
The gap between Player Kessler and Lord Kessler.
He had been a lord for too long. Had he reclaimed his memories as a player by now? Or was he still in the process? Looking into those deepened eyes made such thoughts creep in. Was this how he’d always seen the world?
When I licked his thumb, Kessler looked down at me.
I was curious about everything. Not just his game nickname, but his real name, his age, where he lived… all those trivial things. Could I ever ask him that? Even if we returned to the real world, would our relationship stay the same?
Nothing had ever been settled between us. I didn’t even understand the nature of what we were now, sitting side by side like this. The uncertainty gnawed at me.
“…It was the beach in Gangneung. That’s where my father abandoned me.”
Nyang.
“He told me to play and that he’d come back after finishing his errands. I didn’t even realize I’d been ditched.”
Kessler’s hand, which had been stroking me, slowed down.
“I was building a sandcastle under the blazing sun when a huge wave suddenly swept in and destroyed it all. I almost got heatstroke.”
As he spoke, Kessler gently pinched my little cock between his index finger and thumb, giving it a light shake.
“There was this kid… came over and stuck a parasol in the sand right above my head, then walked away. That shadow saved me.”
Nyang…
“I’m not someone with a wild imagination. I just made the game from my own experiences.”
That was as far as Kessler’s story went. I gave his hand a gentle lick in response to the calmness in his voice.
…
I learned this much later, but even after being abandoned, Kessler went on to live a fairly decent life.
A wealthy couple adopted him, and he emigrated to the U.S. with them, following their careers as game engineers. A few years later, with help from his parents and colleagues, they founded a game company called Kinder Games.
Their breakout title, Nexus Requiem, became a global phenomenon, flipping the landscape of the gaming industry overnight.
…And my life, too.
I got hooked on Nexus Requiem, to the point where even my mom’s constant smacks couldn’t keep me out of PC cafés after school. Eventually, I placed third in the national tournament held the following year and joined a pro team.
‘I remember hearing something about the developer of this new game being really young when I was invited as a tester…’
I never imagined it was Kessler.
It made sense now—why he looked so tenderly at the young lord. That boy was Kessler himself.
The sun was setting beyond the desert. The train pressed forward endlessly.
And finally… the train was passing through the City of the Night. Towering buildings packed tight together, the most advanced civilization in the desert. Despite the dazzling lights spilling through the glass windows… my eyes kept drooping.
Nod… nod…
***
—This station is Daehwa, Daehwa Station. Passengers exiting…
“Excuse me…”
Nya-nya…
“Excuse me!! I think you need to wake up… This is the last stop…”
A gentle touch stirred me, snapping my nodding head upright in a swift jerk.
I glanced around. Through the screen doors, I could see people’s backs disappearing into the distance. Without thinking—almost reflexively—I stood and exited the subway.
“Thank you.”
“You’re Yeo Woo-rim, the pro gamer, right?”
The woman who had woken me up glanced curiously at me and asked.
Her question stopped me in my tracks.
“If it’s not too much trouble, could we take a quick photo together?”
She was already standing beside me, her phone in selfie mode, gently easing into position. One, two, click.
“Thank you so much. Get home safe! Oh, and if you need a taxi, Exit 6!”
With that helpful advice, the woman rode the escalator up and disappeared as though her business was done.
The subway soon left. Alone on the now-empty platform, I stood dazed. I looked back as if expecting someone to be there, but of course, no one was.
I took a single step forward. The place felt more surreal than any fantasy.
“Ah…”
I was back in reality. I could see the tired backs of people worn down by daily life. Even the toast franchise I modeled for last year came into view.
Buses wrapped in red, yellow, and green traffic-light colors, each with their own number, filed in one after another, only to rush off again just as quickly. A moment later, the announcements began to pour out, declaring which bus was arriving next.
It was a scene I thought I’d never see again—a place I had endlessly longed for… and yet, everything felt strangely unfamiliar.
Standing there like a fool, alone, I recalled my memories from before the possession. I was in my room. Just as Jung Da-hoon had said, the real me had synchronized with the game and traveled through it.
I wiped away a single tear that had fallen before I even noticed. Not even when I won the World Championship, nor when I faced crushing defeats right before winning, had I shed a tear. Yet lately, tears had been coming easily.
My memories came rushing back. My friends’ names. My mom’s name. My dad’s name… my phone number, my address. It was nothing grand, and yet it felt deeply moving. I reached into the heavy front pocket of my hoodie and pulled out my phone.
Missed calls, dozens of them. KakaoTalk messages, 999+ unread.
Mom
saw your picture
Mom
updated the travel vlog, please hit like
Mom
haven’t seen you in a week… is something wrong
Mom
your company called, are you okay
Thankfully, she was doing fine. As I always did, I added an emoji to the photo she sent and replied that I was okay.
Then I hailed a taxi.
“To Jeongbalsan, please. Drop me off in front of the main branch of the noodle shop.”
The moment I arrived in my neighborhood, I headed to the playground. There was someone I wanted to check on before anything else. But even now, I still didn’t know his name.
Of course, if I followed my heart, I’d have stormed the game company by now…
Why did we end up separated after being together?
“Maybe he’s overseas.”
It was highly likely. Though the Alpha Test was recruited through Kinder Games Korea, the main headquarters of Kinder Games was located on the West Coast of the United States.
There were so many people I wanted to reach out to, but when it actually came down to it like this, I didn’t even know where to begin—like my brain had stalled, buffering.
Eventually, I stuttered my way through and remembered Jung Da-hoon’s number.
“010…014…”
—Hello?!
The line had barely rung twice before he picked up. His voice sounded exactly like it had in the game. It made me smile like an idiot.
—Hello!!
“Sounds like you were expecting this call. Why the interrogation tone?”
—PROOOOOOO!!
“Yes, it’s me.”
The playground where I sat all alone was so still and quiet, but Jung Da-hoon, on the other end of the call, was roaring with chaos. It was ridiculous and made me laugh even more.
“Thank you, Da-hoon. Thanks to you, I made it back safe.”
—Where are you right now?!
“I’m home. I’m not calling to meet right away, so don’t come looking.”
—Right, of course, you need rest… You really did it… I’m sorry. I yelled too much, didn’t I?
“To be welcomed so loudly—what a lucky guy I am. Anyway, yeah. It’s all thanks to you, Da-hoon. Let’s meet soon. I’ll come see you. Was it Bundang?”
After wrapping up the brief call with Jung Da-hoon, I started replying to the mountain of unread messages.
I even replied to my former team manager, whose Kakao was full of whining like “You left the team and now you’re ghosting everyone?”…
And finally, I contacted my agency—the one that had probably been waiting with bated breath for my message.
The agency manager’s tone changed drastically as time went on. At first, they were threatening breach-of-contract penalties, but now…
Manager Kim
Please, Player-nim, just give me a sign you’re alive?? Even just a single dot… please
Just as he asked, I sent a single dot. After apologizing to him over the phone, I realized there was a mountain of other apologies waiting.
Though nine months had passed in-game, it hadn’t even been a full three months in reality. I was known for going off the grid during the off-season anyway, so even as a semi-public figure, no formal missing person’s report had been filed.
Apparently, the police once raided my home thanks to Da-hoon’s report, and sure enough, there were traces of intrusion all over the place. I wet a dry towel and began scrubbing away the dried footprints stuck to the floor.
I’d heard Da-hoon even had to pay a fine for filing a false report. His efforts and struggle were all etched into my home, and my phone.
Only after the floor was finally clean did I collapse onto my bed. Dust puffed into the air, but I didn’t care. I’d slept just fine in filthier pits inside the game, after all.
But sleep didn’t come easily. I searched Wikipedia for info on the game and the company behind it, but since it wasn’t an officially released title, the developers’ names weren’t public.
So I opened Instagram and checked the fox’s account.
The “account owner deceased” tag in the profile made me snicker. Then I browsed through the photos he had so meticulously uploaded of me.
Eventually, sleep took me. No tossing, no turning—just a deep, dreamless slumber I hadn’t felt in ages.
