Chapter 74
“Cha Yoon, did you spill something? Are you hurt anywhere?”
“……”
Unaware of Seo-jung’s feelings, Woo-jun worriedly addressed Cha Yoon. Woo-jun was right. On the stairs, there was a cup that Cha Yoon had presumably been holding, now rolling around.
Although there wasn’t any particular sound of breaking, Seo-jung wondered if Cha Yoon might have been injured. He reflexively scanned Cha Yoon’s body but suddenly came to his senses.
Whether Cha Yoon was hurt or not, it wasn’t his concern. The right thing to do was to leave this place quickly. That way, he wouldn’t struggle with unnecessary thoughts and emotions.
“I need to wash up now. I’ll go up first.”
“Huh? I’m going up anyway, so let’s go together…”
Seo-jung heard Woo-jun suggesting they go up together, but he didn’t listen to the end of the response and quickly left the spot.
Halfway up the stairs, Seo-jung encountered Cha Yoon standing still. He felt Cha Yoon’s gaze sticking to his face, but Seo-jung avoided eye contact by rolling his eyes downward and passed by him.
Seo-jung entered the room and headed straight for the bathroom. Only after fully closing the bathroom door could he exhale the breath he had been holding.
Seo-jung gripped the sink with both hands. When he closed his eyes, the scene from downstairs replayed in his mind. More precisely, Cha Yoon’s expressionless eyes staring at him kept coming to mind.
His heart was still beating fast. As if he had been caught doing something terribly wrong. Even though he knew that the current Cha Yoon wouldn’t care about such matters.
Then why did he make that expression? If he really didn’t care about what Seo-jung did…
Following this train of thought, Seo-jung let out a self-deprecating laugh. It was because he found himself unconsciously harboring expectations again.
‘You’re not thinking of, like, dating me again, are you?’
‘……’
‘I don’t know about you, but I’m not into that homo stuff. So don’t include me in your ridiculous fantasies.’
Seo-jung recalled what Cha Yoon had said to him after waking up with memory loss. Originally, Cha Yoon was the type of person who naturally thought it was sinful for people of the same gender to be together. It was a more reasonable assumption that he found men being close to each other disgusting and revolting. Yet, he had indulged in an absurd fantasy.
Seo-jung slowly took out the necklace he had put in his pocket. He saw the ring swaying left and right, hanging on the necklace chain between his fingers.
“Ha……”
It was just an hour ago that he had taken off the necklace, which was like his lingering attachment, and decided not to waver anymore. And here he was again, stupidly trying to assign meaning to it.
What was he trying to accomplish like this? Did he really intend to cut Cha Yoon out of his life?
When he raised his head, he saw his reflection in the mirror with wavering eyes. How long would he continue to be shaken by Cha Yoon’s expressions and crumble at his actions? Just as Seo-jung was roughly rubbing his face, trying to shake off thoughts of Cha Yoon…
With a click, the bathroom door opened. Seo-jung reflexively turned around after seeing the face of the person who had flung open the bathroom door in the mirror. As a result, the necklace hanging on his finger fell to the floor with a small thud.
But he had no attention to spare for the fallen necklace. It was because of Cha Yoon, who appeared with an expression not much different from the one on the stairs.
“…Cha Yoon?”
Seo-jung reflexively called Cha Yoon’s name, unable to compose his expression. Cha Yoon didn’t respond to Seo-jung’s call, just glanced at his collarbone area and the bathroom floor, then pushed the door. Soon, the sound of the bathroom door closing was followed by the click of the lock.
Seo-jung finally came to his senses at that sound. And he began to calmly process the situation unfolding before his eyes.
Cha Yoon had opened the closed bathroom door, entered, and locked it.
Although it was surprising, it wasn’t a situation that had never happened before. Because there had been a similar incident before, Seo-jung was able to regain his composure relatively quickly. He deliberately hardened his face and put strength into his voice.
“What are you doing? Didn’t you know I was using the bathroom?”
“I knew.”
“…What did you say?”
“I said I knew you were in here. That’s why I came in.”
The response was so brazen that Seo-jung asked again, thinking he might have misheard, but the answer was the same. Cha Yoon even clearly stated the reason for his action, as if he didn’t want any more misunderstandings contrary to his intention. Seo-jung couldn’t help but frown.
“Cha Yoon, what are you trying to do? Don’t you know this behavior is inappropriate? You’re twenty-nine years old, aren’t you? Aren’t you past the age where I need to explain this to you one by one?”
“……”
Despite the scolding words, Cha Yoon just stared blankly without any particular response. Seo-jung felt frustrated at his demeanor, which was completely different from his dejected appearance in the garden. He sighed, brushing up his bangs.
“Say something. I really don’t understand what you’re thinking to act like this.”
“……”
“You must know this is wrong behavior. I really don’t understand why you’re doing this…”
“Why did you take off the necklace?”
Cutting off Seo-jung’s long speech, Cha Yoon asked in a monotone voice. Hearing this, Seo-jung could only let out a cynical laugh out of bewilderment. Barging into the bathroom just to ask about the necklace. It wasn’t even funny.
“Did you barge into the bathroom just to ask me that?”
“……”
“Didn’t I tell you before? I wore it without any meaning in the first place. So taking off the necklace doesn’t mean anything either. I happened to receive a necklace as a gift from someone else, and there was no reason to keep wearing that necklace anymore, so I took it off.”
“……”
“If you’ve heard the answer, could you please leave? I need to wash up.”
Seo-jung pointed to the bathroom door that Cha Yoon had locked. And as if he no longer had any interest in him, he turned around and put his hand on the faucet attached to the sink. It was to show through his actions that he had no intention of having any more conversations with Cha Yoon.
However, Seo-jung couldn’t turn on the water. It was because of Cha Yoon’s words from behind, just before he could lift the faucet.
“What were you doing with Park Woo-jun earlier?”
Seo-jung’s hand on the faucet tensed. Until just a moment ago, Seo-jung had been reproaching himself while recalling what happened downstairs. Therefore, the words Cha Yoon uttered were enough to make his expression harden.
Cha Yoon reached out his arm, grabbed Seo-jung’s shoulder, and forcibly turned him around. Cha Yoon didn’t care at all about Seo-jung’s frozen expression reflected in the mirror. He was blindly delving into the matter as if the only important thing now was to get a proper answer to his question.
“I asked what you did with him.”
“……”
“Why can’t you speak? I’m asking what you did with that bastard?”
As Seo-jung remained silent, Cha Yoon’s mouth opened this time. As the questions continued, his voice grew louder and his expression became more vicious.
Seo-jung’s dark eyes reflected the image of Cha Yoon, who was closing the distance with a menacing expression and barking at him in the confined space. It was a situation that would have been enough to intimidate an ordinary person, but not Seo-jung. He just looked at Cha Yoon as if he felt nothing.
And Seo-jung’s reaction lit a fire in Cha Yoon’s heart. At Seo-jung’s emotionless expression, Cha Yoon’s lips twisted up and a sarcastic voice burst out.
“Ah, did you do something so dirty that it’s even hard to mention? Is that why you can’t speak?”
“……”
“Shit, if you have a mouth, speak…!”
“If I did, what would you do about it? What does it matter to you what I do with Woo-jun?”
“…Are you joking with me right now?”
Seo-jung burst into laughter as if he had just heard something ridiculous.
“Why would I joke with you, Cha Yoon?”
“……”
“Don’t you remember me saying I don’t want to be involved with you anymore? Think about it. Who jokes with someone they don’t want to be involved with?”
As Seo-jung brought up their early morning conversation again, Cha Yoon’s expression cooled. Seo-jung looked over his face and continued.
“I have no reason to suggest doing dirty things with you, so please stop caring about what I do and with whom.”
“……”
“Anyway, once we leave here, you and I won’t have any reason to see each other again. So let’s just live as if we don’t exist to each other and then part ways. I’m not asking for anything difficult, am I?”
The phrase “no reason to see each other again” particularly struck Cha Yoon’s heart. He couldn’t make any rebuttal. There was nothing wrong with what Ki Seo-jung said.
Cha Yoon reflected on the six months before he appeared on the program “Please Take Care of My X.” It was exactly as Ki Seo-jung had said. The two hadn’t even accidentally encountered each other, which seemed at odds with the fact that they had been lovers for seven years.
And it would be the same after the four-week period in the X House ended. He probably wouldn’t have any reason to meet Ki Seo-jung again. It was natural. Because that’s the kind of relationship he and Ki Seo-jung had.
A relationship where not meeting was natural. That was also the most accurate definition of his relationship with Ki Seo-jung. As he became aware of this point, which he had never thought about since entering this place, Cha Yoon felt his heart beating rapidly. And simultaneously, this thought arose:
‘Why should it be like that? Why should I never see Ki Seo-jung again? Why is that natural?’
Cha Yoon’s mind was instantly filled with the word ‘why.’
