#139
The world that had seemed rosy until just a short while ago now felt distant.
The most infuriating point was that I found myself censoring my own thoughts, wondering if I was overreacting. While it was clearly strange by my standards, I kept trying to consider and defend the other party’s perspective.
‘No matter how I think about it, I don’t understand… If they really liked me, wouldn’t it have been right to be honest with me and try to persuade me to stay by their side?’
Even if I try to put myself in their shoes, wouldn’t that have been the right thing to do?
No matter how I looked at it, it felt like the three of them had just made a fool out of me. They created a non-existent Part 2, unnecessarily made me worry about the future, controlled my thoughts, and deceived me.
The three I loved most, who supported me, had deceived me. While saying they loved me and that it was for my own good.
‘Is this love?’
I didn’t feel that a good result justified everything. I was just so angry.
“Ugh… mmm…”
As I was trying to compose myself to manage my expression before the two returned, suddenly a groan escaped from Han Nari’s lips.
“Nari, are you okay?”
Startled, I hurriedly ran over as Han Nari slowly opened her eyes.
‘Why did she wake up now?’
Usually, healthy people wake up quickly even if they faint, but Han Nari woke up much later than I did. If Nine, after meeting Hyun Dowoon, had prevented Han Nari from regaining consciousness so that I couldn’t say anything while it went outside to talk with Shin Haejun…
‘No, that’s going too far…’
Surely Nine wouldn’t control characters like that? She probably just woke up when it was time.
‘Why do I have to doubt everything?’
I was confused, wondering if everything was a lie – the sudden kindness from people, what Nine had said, the joy on the faces of the two when I gave them the rings…
This was the scariest part of lies. Making you doubt even things that had seemed perfectly fine before.
‘How could Dowoon do this to me…’
Hyun Dowoon had already learned with me how difficult it is to restore broken trust. Shin Haejun and Nine, who had witnessed this, should have known as well.
Because of that, I felt an overwhelming sense of betrayal. How could they break trust again after experiencing it once and seeing it happen?
“…nim, Guide Lee Jaeha-nim. Is something wrong? Your expression…”
As I held my throbbing head, Han Nari, who had opened her eyes wide, was looking at me with concern.
I looked at her with mixed emotions. Was Han Nari also part of Nine and the two’s scheme? The fake author’s memo that Nine had shown me mentioned using Han Nari to punish me… What were they planning? By what criteria did they choose her?
“Guide-nim? Are you alright? You’re sweating…”
Han Nari muttered as she examined my face. As I slowly rubbed my forehead, I felt the cold sweat that had indeed formed there.
‘Han Nari… was assigned when the author was still around, so it’s not a relationship created as a lie from the beginning.’
Thinking this way cooled my head a bit, but I was still scared. The situation where I had to doubt everything continuously.
But soon the two would return. Somehow, I needed to regain my composure and act as usual.
“I’m fine. I think I’m not feeling well because of the collapse earlier.”
“Ah, that’s right! You collapsed first, Guide-nim! I’m usually quite sturdy, so I don’t know why I fainted. I guess I was scared of falling.”
Han Nari wrinkled her nose and smiled. I nodded and asked about her condition.
“Are you in pain anywhere?”
“I’m perfectly fine! Oh? But where did the two of them go?”
“Ah, they’re outside for a moment… Listen, my head hurts too much, so I think I need to rest a bit… Could you explain the situation to them when they return?”
“If your head hurts, you should rest! Put the dungeon out of your mind and just rest for now!”
When I asked Han Nari, not knowing how to face the two or if I could look at them normally, she nodded vigorously.
I staggered towards an empty space and took out a cot from my inventory. I covered it with a blanket, lay down, and covered my head. Finally, I could stop suppressing my feelings.
‘This is terrible…’
Even without looking in a mirror, I could clearly feel that my face showed my distress. I felt utterly miserable.
‘How could Nine do this to me?’
As I thought about how strange it was, all the discrepancies I had felt before came flooding back.
Ray, who suddenly appeared and kidnapped me while acting carelessly, might have been controlled by Nine now that I think about it. In retrospect, it was an incredibly out-of-nowhere timing and ridiculous method.
The dungeons and movie contents that were exactly like the game were probably because Nine thought of them. It wasn’t that the author had played Limitless Nine, but Nine had designed it, which is why the content was identical to the game.
And I remembered how Nine had comforted me after we came out of the dungeon that targeted Han Nari instead of me.
The statement that targeting Han Nari instead of me was the author’s attempt to touch on my guilt. If it were the real author, wouldn’t they think of me as the villain Lee Jaeha rather than Lee Yeonsoo, and not assume I would feel guilty? I hadn’t thought about it at all then, but looking back now, there were many moments that seemed strange.
Making me worry and then comforting me? How could it manipulate me like that?
‘Could the thing about ??? have been a lie too?’
The sudden claim that it had betrayed me was also out of the blue. I felt like I was going crazy with confusion about who to trust and who not to trust.
‘I can’t forgive Shin Haejun and Hyun Dowoon either.’
My eyes grew hot. My eyelids must have turned red. Hot liquid threatened to spill out from my eyelids.
Could I look at the two of them as usual in this state? Could I smile casually and tell them I love them?
“Hm? Why is Jaeha…?”
“He said he had a headache and lay down. I think it’s best not to disturb him.”
“Oh no.”
As I was pondering with an almost maddening feeling, I suddenly heard Hyun Dowoon and Shin Haejun talking with Han Nari about various things, seemingly having returned.
As soon as I heard their voices, I realized.
The fact that I couldn’t just let this slide. My heart was so broken that I wasn’t sure if we could return to the same relationship as before.
Thanks to Han Nari stopping them whenever the two tried to see me, I was able to lie alone and think about future events until just before we left the dungeon.
‘I can’t stay by their side like this.’
Above all, the sense of betrayal from Nine was too great. I had thought it was obviously on my side, but it actively tried to harm me while saying it was for my own good. The betrayal felt even greater because of the complete trust I had given.
While I might understand it from humans like Hyun Dowoon or Shin Haejun, I thought Nine, being an AI, would be my unchanging ally.
‘An absolute ally, as if such a thing could exist.’
Indeed, it was impossible for such a fortunate thing to happen in my life. For me…
***
I don’t know in what state of mind I faced the two of them. Even after we finished clearing the dungeon and got in the car to go home, I pretended to sleep because of a headache. Of course, I was actually experiencing quite a severe headache, so it probably didn’t feel like I was pretending.
Even after returning home, I shut myself in my room, saying I felt feverish. I knew the two were constantly worried, but it all felt superficial.
‘They probably do like me. Not everything can be a lie.’
But I couldn’t distinguish what was truth and what was lie. It felt like my ability to read and empathize with others’ feelings had completely broken down.
Lying on my side in bed, I stared intently at the Limitless Nine icon. The path I had struggled through with Nine was vivid in my mind.
‘When I suddenly fell into this world, if it weren’t for Nine… I wouldn’t have been able to adapt.’
I might not have been able to cope properly due to the fear of being left alone. It’s not easy to navigate difficulties without any information, waking up in the body of a person I’ve never seen before in a world I’ve never seen before. Maybe… I could have been helplessly dealt with as the author wanted.
However, thanks to Nine constantly giving me quests and providing hints, I was able to survive safely. I had already owed Nine a life debt, so to speak.
‘If it hated me… if it wanted to harm me out of hatred, there would have been no reason to stop the author.’
It must be clear that Nine has some affection for me. It probably didn’t lie about that much.
However, it was also true that it had acted differently on the surface and underneath.
‘Why? What’s the reason?’
Why does it want to keep me in this world so badly?
Nine is the system of Limitless Nine anyway, so it would follow me even if I returned to the real world.
‘Either Nine has a reason to stay in this world…’
Or, if it has no choice but to remain in this world, it decided to keep me here?
‘If I return to the original world… will Nine disappear?’
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
