Everything had changed ever since Cha Jae-woo took charge of the Association’s affairs. He had personally said that it was the only way to prevent unnecessary casualties. And, just as he claimed, even when unpredictable gates appeared, people were now able to respond with remarkable composure.
Cha Jae-woo was accomplishing something truly extraordinary. And thanks to that, it was obvious he would be utterly exhausted today. Given the circumstances, it was only natural that I felt awkward having him personally drive me somewhere. Well… even though I knew that the fatigue caused by using his abilities wouldn’t simply disappear just by resting.
“I should probably get a driver’s license.”
Anyway, Cha Jae-woo had already come to pick me up, and we had just arrived at our destination in his car. After mulling over it, I concluded that feeling embarrassed any longer was completely pointless. But maybe because I still felt guilty about troubling him, my mouth started running on its own.
“I should buy a car too… A small one. That way it’ll be easier for me to get around.”
I had thought about it before, and honestly, it didn’t seem like such a bad idea. If I wasn’t going to stay at Cha Jae-woo’s house, someone would still need to come and go—and it didn’t always have to be Cha Jae-woo.
“I’ll move around. It’s fine.”
Of course, it seemed Cha Jae-woo didn’t exactly share that opinion.
I wasn’t sure. Was it because I hated being a bother? Or was it because I was nervous about casually dropping by Cha Jae-woo’s house? What would happen if I just drove over and showed up unannounced? Would Cha Jae-woo panic? And if so, why?
There were so many things I was curious about, but given the situation, I ended up keeping my mouth shut. I glanced at my phone’s blacked-out screen.
The truth was, I had contacted the madam earlier that morning. I hadn’t told Cha Jae-woo, but ever since I had come out of the gate with him and stayed briefly at his place, we had been exchanging occasional messages. Since I was going to Cha Jae-woo’s house today, I had reached out to let her know in advance—but it turned out she already knew. The madam had been genuinely delighted, practically glowing with joy. It was a stark contrast to Cha Jae-woo’s attitude.
Thanks to that, I could conclude he probably hadn’t hidden anything in the house. If Cha Jae-woo had hidden something, there was a good chance the madam would have known about it.
[Make sure to check out the room you used to stay in.]
The extra comment she sent reinforced my suspicions. If she went out of her way to mention it, it must mean there was something there.
It wasn’t like there would be decorations saying “Welcome back.” I guessed that whatever it was, it might be the thing making Cha Jae-woo uneasy.
[Don’t tell him I said anything—just act natural.]
The madam’s message clearly implied that Cha Jae-woo would try to stop me from going into that room, strengthening my theory. I struggled to suppress the growing urge to run straight to that room. There must be a reason she told me to act natural, so I decided to hold back.
“Should we eat first?”
Soon, the car passed through the massive gate. The sprawling garden swept past the car windows. I nodded as I looked at Cha Jae-woo.
“Let’s do that.”
Finally, I was getting away from this house. There had been a time when I thought I would never come back. Rather than feeling happy, I felt a profound sense of relief at having survived.
Back then, Cha Jae-woo had been an object of fear to me. No matter how much I loved him, no matter how necessary I was to him, the thought that he could kill me the moment he decided to had wrapped itself around my neck like a noose.
The instant I lost my usefulness, I would die. That was what I had firmly believed.
And even with those thoughts swirling inside me, I hadn’t been able to Guide him. I had been too afraid that if I removed all his restrictions through Guiding, he would end up causing even more casualties.
“Why?”
But in the end, he hadn’t done that. He was now sitting peacefully beside me like this. What mattered most to him wasn’t revenge or anything else—it was me.
He had stopped everything and filled his mind with only me. How could I possibly fear him anymore?
The feelings he conveyed every time we met told me there was no longer any need to be afraid.
“It’s just… my eyes naturally went to you.”
I must have stared at Cha Jae-woo a little too intently, lost in resurfacing old thoughts.
Still, I didn’t bother to avert my gaze. I figured, why not? Seeing his face wouldn’t hurt.
Maybe it was because Cha Jae-woo’s demeanor was gradually softening in the exact way I had hoped. It made me a little bolder.
Wasn’t it fine to express my feelings? He’s mine, after all. It’s not like looking at him would cause any harm.
Embarrassing thoughts like that kept popping into my head. Technically, I hadn’t made it official yet, but… when would I? When was I supposed to say it?
It wasn’t a sudden worry I dwelled on for long.
“Cha Jae-woo, you must have been handsome from birth, right?”
An even more ridiculous—but something I truly wanted to ask—question tumbled out without any filter, giving me no time to hesitate.
Cha Jae-woo didn’t respond. Normally, he answered most things sincerely, but it seemed this one was hard for him to reply to.
“I bet you were adorable even as a kid. Do you happen to have a photo—?”
Finding his reaction amusing, my lips kept running without any sense of restraint. But I abruptly stopped talking, struck by the thought of what his childhood must have been like.
Knowing full well how young Cha Jae-woo had been when he lost his parents, and how he had lived afterward—was it really right to bring up childhood photos?
Would there even be any? And even if there were, would they really hold good memories for him?
“There are a lot of photos from when I was about four.”
The sigh that had been threatening to slip from between my lips was quickly swallowed back. Cha Jae-woo answered with a smile, but somehow, it wouldn’t have been surprising if he had looked like he was about to cry instead.
“Wanna see?”
Cha Jae-woo asked lightly, still smiling.
I quickly composed my expression and nodded. Honestly, I was a little excited.
***
After a dinner that looked almost like a royal feast—clearly prepared with extra care because I was coming—I moved sluggishly.
There had been so much delicious food that I had eaten recklessly, to the point where it felt like the food was lodged right up to my throat.
I was feeling pretty good after the feast, but I definitely needed to digest. And for that, Cha Jae-woo’s house was perfect—spacious enough to leisurely stroll around.
Even though it was a house I had stayed in for quite a while, I still wandered around, gazing at everything as if I were seeing someone else’s home.
In truth, not much had changed. The first floor, which had once been barren but gradually filled with furniture after I moved in, remained the same, and so did the second floor. I tried to spot anything different, but no matter how carefully I looked, there wasn’t anything.
Strangely, that satisfied me. Especially the fact that the furniture on the first floor hadn’t been cleared out—it pleased me the most. After all, the reason those pieces were brought in was because of me. They were undoubtedly meant for me.
Thinking like that might have been a little ridiculous, but I didn’t believe for a second that the reason Cha Jae-woo had brought in that furniture was simply to make a good impression on a Guide or to enhance my side effects.
It had been a gesture of consideration, a genuine feeling. He just hadn’t realized it at the time. He had merely convinced himself that it was a tool to deceive his Guide.
Not just saying it for comfort—truthfully, Cha Jae-woo had no need to bother with such trivial details. It wasn’t like he was a particularly meticulous person.
Back then, I had been completely smitten with Cha Jae-woo. Honestly, things weren’t much different now, but at the time, I was so obsessed that it practically radiated from me—I lived my life loving him like I was losing my mind.
Would it have mattered to someone like me if the first floor had lacked a bit of furniture? Would Cha Jae-woo have needed to bother setting it up?
To make me like him more? No, just receiving regular Guiding sessions was enough for Cha Jae-woo to play with my heart as much as he pleased. There had been no need for that.
Of course, it’s not like I heard this directly from Cha Jae-woo. But even if it was just my own conviction—what did it matter? If thinking that way made me happy, then it was good enough.
“Wow. Looks like there’s more than I expected.”
My slow steps finally brought me to the second-floor living room. Right then, Cha Jae-woo stepped out of his room, carrying the photos he had promised to show me.
I hadn’t thought there would be so many, but unexpectedly, he had an entire album in his hands. And it was fairly thick, too.
“They took a lot of pictures.”
Cha Jae-woo’s answer was brief.
I nodded, tightening my lips to contain my emotions. I could easily imagine how much his parents must have adored him. Cha Jae-woo probably knew it too.
“I want to see.”
As I reached out my hand, Cha Jae-woo immediately handed me the album.
