His vision was strange. One eye wouldn’t open properly due to something obstructing it, and the other was blurred as if filled with tears.
Then, a small hand rubbed the tear-filled eye. As the tears fell in heavy drops, his vision cleared.
‘Mom, I’m sorry.’
A child’s voice echoed. No—it was his own voice.
The young boy clasped his hands together and began to beg desperately. Beyond his trembling hands stood the mother of Seo Ha-yoon, someone he had seen before.
‘Shut up! Shut your mouth! I don’t even want to hear your voice!’
Seo Ha-yoon’s mother screamed hysterically, looking entirely different from how he remembered. The once elegant curves of her body had withered away to a pitifully thin frame. Her eyes were sunken, her cheeks hollow, and her skin dry and lifeless. A headscarf covered her head, most likely because she had lost her hair from chemotherapy.
‘How old are you, and you’re still spilling food everywhere?! You got that filthiness from your father! Didn’t I tell you not to make a mess while eating?!’
She shook the switch in her hand threateningly, her voice cracking in rage.
‘I’m sorry. I’m sorry.’
Seo Ha-yoon could only repeat the same words over and over again, hands clasped together in desperate pleading.
His mother, staring down at him with cruel eyes, suddenly began to lash out wildly with the switch.
Smack! Smack!
It was nothing short of senseless beating. She struck the child’s body indiscriminately.
‘Aaah! Aagh!’
Seo Ha-yoon screamed in his small, childlike voice, curling his body in on itself. It was his best attempt at a defensive posture. But the relentless blows did not stop.
‘You dare to scream?! What are you crying for?! Are you trying to tell the whole world that I’m a horrible mother?! Who do you think is to blame for all this?! Shut your mouth! I said shut it!’
His mother roared. From then on, Seo Ha-yoon clenched his lips tightly, holding back even the whimpers that threatened to escape. The force behind the blows gradually weakened, but the pain remained just as sharp.
His hands, now cradling his head, felt something wet. Bringing it before his eyes, he saw bright red blood. The switch had split the skin on his head. His mother must have seen it too, but she didn’t care in the slightest.
Seo Ha-yoon’s gaze drifted slightly to the side. There, a full-length mirror reflected the two of them. His own figure—curled up like a pill bug, taking the beating without resistance—was clearly visible. Blood trickled down from one eye, leaving it unable to open properly. The other eye, now puffy from tears, could only watch helplessly—watch his mother, who was striking him mercilessly, and the pitiful reflection of himself in the mirror.
Just then, a metallic clatter rang out as the front door swung open. Seo Chang-seop stepped inside, his face contorting in shock at the sight of them.
‘Honey, what the hell are you doing again?!’
Seo Chang-seop rushed forward and quickly snatched the switch from his wife’s hand. He crouched down in front of Seo Ha-yoon, carefully examining his wounds.
‘It’s okay, Ha-yoon. You’re okay now.’
Seo Chang-seop wrapped his arms around the curled-up Seo Ha-yoon, gently patting his back. Only then did Seo Ha-yoon finally burst into tears.
The strong scent of cigarettes clung to Seo Chang-seop. For some reason, Kim Min-seok found it unbearably repulsive.
***
“Hah…!”
Kim Min-seok’s eyes snapped open as he jolted awake. Though he hadn’t actually been beaten, his entire body was stiff, as if he had just suffered through a brutal assault.
“Ha-yoon? What’s wrong? Did you have a nightmare?”
Ha Jun-seo, who had been reclining on the couch watching TV with Kim Min-seok’s head resting on his thigh, looked at him in alarm. Kim Min-seok gasped for air, unable to respond.
“You must’ve watched a scary movie or something. Look at you, covered in cold sweat. What kind of nightmare did you have?”
Ha Jun-seo wiped the sweat from Kim Min-seok’s forehead with a concerned expression.
“No, it’s not that… It was just… a bad dream.”
Kim Min-seok mumbled under his breath.
His past of being abused by his parents was nothing to be proud of. In fact, it was a weakness—one he couldn’t carelessly talk about.
“Here, drink some water first.”
Ha Jun-seo unscrewed a bottle of water and handed it to him. Kim Min-seok took it and gulped it down desperately. The cool water soothed his throat, and he let out a quiet sigh.
“You still look awful. Must’ve been a really bad dream.”
Ha Jun-seo brushed his fingers gently across the corner of Kim Min-seok’s eye.
“Yeah. It was… pretty bad.”
Kim Min-seok sat up from Ha Jun-seo’s lap and curled up on the couch. From a previous dream, he had already known that Seo Ha-yoon’s mother resented him. But he hadn’t realized just how severe the abuse had been.
For Kim Min-seok, who had grown up an orphan, the concept of family was something so precious it brought tears to his eyes just thinking about it. But for Seo Ha-yoon… perhaps family had been something he only wanted to escape from.
Even as his mother beat him so viciously, Seo Ha-yoon hadn’t even thought to run. He had only curled up, accepting it. The eyes that stared back at him from the mirror—those lifeless, pitch-black eyes—were haunting. Thinking about that gaze, the young Seo Ha-yoon seemed unbearably pitiful.
Now that he thought about it, Seo Chang-seop had been surprising. He had always thought of him as a parasite, leeching off his son. But in that moment, he had held his adopted child with warmth. Maybe that was why Seo Ha-yoon had always given him money without resistance.
“What are you thinking about so deeply?”
The sudden question from beside him made Kim Min-seok pause. After hesitating for a moment, he answered,
“Seo Ha-yoon.”
“You dreamed about Ha-yoon again?”
Ha Jun-seo guessed immediately.
“…Yeah.”
“What kind of dream was it?”
“It’s a bit hard to talk about… Just not a good one.”
“Hmm…”
“I used to envy Seo Ha-yoon a lot. But thinking about it now… maybe he wasn’t as happy as I thought.”
Kim Min-seok murmured, his thoughts drifting to Seo Ha-yoon. Repeated abuse in childhood had a way of breaking a person down. Especially when the abuse came from someone close—it left an even deeper wound. Was Ha-yoon’s difficult personality a result of the trauma he endured as a child?
“What about you, Min-seok?”
Ha Jun-seo suddenly asked.
“Huh?”
“Have you lived a happy life?”
“Uh… No. But I wouldn’t say I was unhappy either.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
As he answered, Kim Min-seok reflected on his life. He had never owned much. Every day had been lonely. But he had never thought of himself as miserable. He had just focused on living, surviving, pushing forward.
“Of course… I got beaten up by the older boys in the orphanage sometimes, and I was bullied for being an orphan. But that was just normal for kids growing up in a place like that. After I left the orphanage, I was too busy making ends meet to dwell on whether I was happy or not. …Though, I guess there were moments when I felt happy.”
“When?”
“When I got my paycheck from a part-time job and cracked open a cold beer after work. For some reason, that always made me feel happy.”
“Just that?”
“Yeah, just that.”
Kim Min-seok nodded. Ha Jun-seo let out a small chuckle.
“Then how about we have a beer together? What do you think?”
“Hmm…”
Kim Min-seok hesitated for a moment before nodding. It had been a while since he last had a drink, and he missed that cool, refreshing sensation of beer sliding down his throat.
“Then I guess I’ll run to the convenience store real quick.”
Ha Jun-seo stood up, but Kim Min-seok reached out and tugged him back down.
“Wait. You’re not planning to go, are you?”
“Why? I’ll be quick. Or do you want to come with me?”
“No, you stay here. I’ll go by myself.”
Kim Min-seok pointed at Ha Jun-seo’s face, still bruised a deep blue.
“If you go out looking like that and someone takes a picture, it’ll be a problem.”
“Ah… Right.”
Ha Jun-seo clicked his tongue.
“Hmm. But I don’t feel good about letting you go alone.”
“I saw a convenience store right next to the apartment entrance. It won’t even take me five minutes.”
Ha Jun-seo hesitated for a moment before nodding.
“Alright. Be careful.”
He looked at Kim Min-seok as if sending him off on a long trip. Amused by the expression, Kim Min-seok gave him a small smile before grabbing his wallet and phone, then stepping out of the apartment.
As he took the elevator down and exited the building, a deep voice suddenly called out.
“Ha-yoon!”
Before he could react, a firm hand grabbed his arm.
“Seo Chang-seop…?”
“Seo Chang-seop? Where did you learn that kind of rude habit—calling your father by his name?”
Seo Chang-seop scolded, his voice carrying a hint of irritation. He looked even more hollowed-out than he had a few days ago.
“But never mind that. That’s not the issue right now… Ha-yoon, do you want to see your father die? Are you really not going to send me any money?”
