Just imagining it made his heart feel like it was about to leap out of his chest. Yu-jin swallowed dryly and blinked rapidly. There were still no signs of movement beyond the door.
He had to go.
Finally making up his mind, Yu-jin pushed himself up from the bed. But just as his feet touched the floor, another thought crept in.
What if he’s already asleep?
That thought alone paralyzed him. If Winston was already fast asleep, wouldn’t it be incredibly embarrassing to go to his room all by himself, desperate and restless? Worse yet, he couldn’t even begin to imagine how Winston would see him for it.
What if he doesn’t think anything of it, and I’m just overreacting on my own…?
With that, Yu-jin quickly retracted his feet and lay back down. Stop being foolish and just sleep. Winston must be sleeping too. Yeah, that’s right. Scolding himself, he forced his eyes shut, trying to will himself into slumber.
But then, another thought stirred him.
What if Winnie is waiting for me too?
His eyes flew open. Maybe, just like him, Winston was hesitating at this very moment.
Yes, that has to be it.
Yu-jin shot up again but froze in place.
Why would Winnie hesitate? He kisses people like it’s nothing.
At that, Yu-jin flopped back onto the bed. His heart kept pounding relentlessly, and he felt like he was going to lose his mind with frustration. Neither moving nor staying still felt like the right answer.
What do I do? What do I do?
He was caught in a fierce battle between the part of him that wanted to march over to Winston’s door right this second and the part that held him back. Lying down, then getting up, over and over, he wrestled with himself until, far off in the distance, the first light of dawn began to creep in.
***
“Haaahm—”
Yu-jin let out a long yawn, then quickly clamped a hand over his mouth, glancing around in alarm. Fortunately, Winston didn’t seem to notice. Understandably so—his own eyes were bloodshot from exhaustion.
Yu-jin, watching him closely, cautiously broke the silence. “Hey, Winnie.”
“Huh…?”
Winston’s response was sluggish, unlike his usual self. He was barely poking at his scrambled eggs, and when he finally lifted his head, his fatigued, ashen face immediately met Yu-jin’s gaze.
Yu-jin’s eyes widened in shock. “What’s wrong? Are you feeling sick?”
At his worried question, Winston blinked a few times before shaking his head and dropping his gaze back to his plate. “Just… a little tired. You don’t look so great yourself. Are you okay?”
His weary eyes flickered toward Yu-jin’s face, and this time, Yu-jin was the one who avoided eye contact.
“I-I’m fine. Just… t-tired too.”
What if he asks why I’m tired?
Yu-jin’s heart pounded nervously, but thankfully, Winston didn’t press him. After all, he was in the same situation.
I could probably go a whole year without jerking off.
Winston stared blankly, lost in thought. What if Yu-jin suddenly asked why he looked so exhausted? What the hell was he supposed to say?
I was jerking off thinking about you.
The moment the thought crossed his mind, Winston immediately imagined how Yu-jin would react.
Ah, fuck. A whole year, my ass.
Yu-jin’s face, flushed bright red, looking utterly flustered before whispering, “Then… do you want to come to my room…?” The second that image formed in his head, Winston felt himself getting hard. Thank God the table hid the evidence.
Desperately avoiding eye contact, he forced himself to focus on eating. Neither of them had a clue that the other hadn’t slept a wink for the exact same reason. Instead, they both silently stared at their plates, shoving down tasteless food.
***
After breakfast, Winston had excused himself and retreated to his room, not even sparing Yu-jin a glance. It was nearly an hour later when he finally reappeared. Strangely, he looked even more exhausted than before, and his scent—a subtle, sweet fragrance—was much stronger than usual.
Yu-jin’s face twisted with worry. “Winnie, are you sure you’re okay? If you’re not feeling well, we can go to the hospital. I don’t mind if we go back to The Most Perfect Delight…”
Just as Yu-jin reached out to touch him, Winston abruptly stepped back.
Yu-jin’s eyes widened in surprise, and seeing his reaction, Winston quickly scrambled to explain. “Ah, no, I’m fine. I just needed some rest. You don’t have to worry.”
Yu-jin hesitated, his hand faltering in midair. But before he could fully pull away, Winston grabbed hold of it.
“Sorry, I was just caught off guard for a second. Don’t worry about it.”
He forced a bright smile, and only then did Yu-jin’s tense expression soften. That would have been the end of it—except Yu-jin went too far.
Before Winston had any chance to react, Yu-jin suddenly threw both arms around him in a tight embrace.
“Thank God. I was really worried about you.”
“Uh, uh… yeah.”
As their bodies pressed together, Winston caught the faint trace of Yu-jin’s pheromones.
And that was all it took.
Heat surged through him again. Panic flared as he quickly peeled Yu-jin off of him, though he masked it by casually throwing an arm around his shoulders instead.
“Alright, let’s head out. What do you want to do today?”
“I…”
Yu-jin was saying something, but Winston barely heard a word. His mind was already racing elsewhere.
Suppressants. Right. There should be suppressants.
Too bad he didn’t have any with him. There was no way he could go an entire day in heat like this. He needed to get his hands on something, fast.
That’s it.
A thought suddenly struck him—Evelyn’s party.
***
“Evelyn’s villa?!”
Yu-jin, who had barely settled into the car, practically shouted at the sudden revelation.
“You said you weren’t going, so why now?”
His face was an open book, confusion written all over it.
Winston replied nonchalantly, “I just need to pick something up. We won’t stay long, so it’s fine, right?”
“…Alright.”
Seeing Winston flash a wry smile as he apologized, Yu-jin couldn’t bring himself to refuse any further. He slumped into the passenger seat, sinking into his seat in defeat.
It’s just to pick something up. It’ll be quick.
I can’t get jealous over something like this.
What if Winnie thinks I’m being a nuisance…?
He should be grateful that Winston had even brought him along. If he started whining and throwing a fit over every little thing, wouldn’t Winston just get fed up with him?
You’re an adult. You need to handle things you don’t like sometimes.
Yu-jin tried to convince himself, steeling his resolve. If only Winston had cracked a joke or said something to lighten the mood, maybe he would have relaxed a little. But unfortunately, Winston stayed silent, eyes fixed on the road, as if he were determined to forget that Yu-jin was even in the car with him.
Sitting beside him, Yu-jin kept repeating in his head: Don’t be a burden. Don’t be a burden.
***
“Winnie!”
The moment Winston stepped inside, Evelyn, who had been lounging on the couch chatting with friends, stood up with a delighted expression. It was as if she had fully expected him to walk in at any moment.
Winston, who had been smiling faintly, quickly leaned down to whisper to Yu-jin, “I’ll tell you right now—stop calling me Winnie.”
He added a reassuring smile, and Yu-jin could only nod in response.
Evelyn approached them, glancing between the two with curiosity. “What brings you here? Didn’t you say you weren’t coming to the party?”
“Ah, well.”
The party, which had supposedly started last night, was still in full swing. From the garden that connected to the beach, raucous laughter and shrill, intoxicated screams echoed through the villa.
Winston cleared his throat and said, “I need something. I was hoping you might have some. Can we talk in private?”
At his subtle gesture, Evelyn blinked in confusion before nodding.
Then, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, Winston leaned down and pressed a light kiss to Yu-jin’s cheek. “Wait here for a sec,” he murmured before following Evelyn out of the room.
Yu-jin was left standing alone, awkward and out of place.
Come back soon, Winnie…
He couldn’t stop himself from wondering—what exactly did they need to talk about in private? The thought nagged at him, making him increasingly uneasy.
The party was a chaotic mess, people drunkenly stumbling about, and it was starting to make him nervous. Every time someone got too close, he flinched and stepped aside.
Then, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a couple in the distance, locked in a deep, heated kiss.
Oh?
His gaze lingered without thinking, but within moments, his eyes widened in shock.
The couple was doing far more than just kissing. The woman’s hand had slipped inside the man’s swim trunks, and from the way he let out a low groan—
Yu-jin clapped a hand over his mouth in horror.
W-what the hell…?! In front of all these people?!
Yu-jin was already flustered, but what shocked him even more was that no one seemed to care.
People passed by them as if they were nothing more than pieces of furniture, utterly indifferent to the scene unfolding right in front of them.
That realization only made Yu-jin even more stunned.
