12) Welfare Center
Dojin often said that Iri’s Curio Rental Shop wasn’t really a rental shop, but rather a ‘Wia-Exclusive Comprehensive Service Center’. Ever since he started working there in earnest, he’d grown even more convinced of it.
About half of the Wia who came by were looking for a specific curio, and the other half came saying they didn’t need a curio at all—what they needed was Immortal Iri’s help.
They’d finally decided to go on a blind date but couldn’t choose between wearing red or blue.
They’d made a bet with a friend and wanted someone to referee.
They didn’t know how to use a smartphone and wanted someone to teach them….
The Wia came running to Iri asking him to solve even the most ridiculous things. And Iri, smiling gently, accepted every single one.
‘Your blind date likes red, so wear red.’
‘If you don’t mind me, I’ll referee—bring your friend.’
‘See, when you touch it with your finger, the screen changes. That’s called touch.’
Watching this, Dojin was the only one getting worked up inside.
Facilities for that kind of thing actually existed separately.
The Welfare Center.
It was a facility the King of the True Mortal Realm had established in the Middle Realm out of concern for Iri’s excessive workload. But since it had only been created thirty years ago, many Wia still didn’t even know it existed.
“They don’t promote it at all! Because they don’t want to work! This is why you can’t trust human-descended spirits or anything related to humans!”
Just moments ago, some minor god had come under the pretense of seeking advice, sat across from Immortal Iri, enjoyed some delicious tea while chatting away—and then left.
Dojin had been wearing such a murderous expression that Iri hadn’t let him anywhere near the consultation room. The moment the customer left the shop, Dojin burst out, clawing at his hair.
“Those bastards are probably still lazing around right now, saying shit like, ‘Man, coming down here was the best decision. We get virtue every month just for lying around,’ ‘Iri’s Comprehensive Service Center is busy, but who cares?’ ‘The Wia like Immortal Iri, so what can you do?’ ‘Let’s just slack off and collect virtue.’ I swear, that’s exactly how they’re acting! Every last one of those human-descended types is like that!”
Despite being human-descended himself, Dojin’s extremely biased rant made Iri smile awkwardly.
“Unfounded disparagement costs you virtue.”
“I don’t care if I lose some. I’m not the kind of person who’s so scared of losing a bit of virtue that I keep my mouth shut. I just need to preserve about enough for ten Gido Ceremonies, right?”
Dojin fumed.
“And fuck, I know not every human spirit is like this, but at least the Welfare Center bastards? Every single one of them is like this. Rotten from the top down!”
“Unfounded—”
“What do you mean unfounded?! They’ve gone thirty years without proper promotion, they know you’re overworked, and they still haven’t done a damn thing! No effort to share the workload, no contact at all! Aaagh, this pisses me off!”
Dojin shouted at the top of his lungs. The small animals and minor creatures playing while nibbling on fresh oak shoots scattered in fright. Kkiwoong, who’d been sleeping soundly in the front pocket of Dojin’s shirt, startled awake and scurried over to Iri.
“I’m seriously pissed. I feel like I’m gonna get Hwabyeong. I want to storm into the Welfare Center right now and flip the place upside down—shit, seriously. Master, I’ll handle this. You just drink tea and rest.”
Roaring as he followed Iri around, Dojin plopped himself down next to him the moment Iri sat at the workbench. On the bench was a curio that had been returned after a long-term rental, disassembled into 172 pieces—each piece needing to be carefully cleaned one by one.
Even while furious to the tips of his hair, Dojin moved his hands, trying to share his master’s workload as much as possible. His mouth, of course, kept moving too.
“At Iri’s Curio Rental Shop, you should only be handling curio-related work. If it’s not curio-related, they should be told to go to the Welfare Center, period. Honestly, even with just curio work, twenty-four hours isn’t enough.”
“Still, having you here has helped a lot.”
“Don’t try to sweet-talk me just to calm me down.”
Dojin glared. Feeling called out, Iri quietly turned his head away.
Dojin let out a sigh.
“Master, don’t you feel wronged? You don’t even have a personal life. Morning and night, all you do is listen to customers whining.”
“Hmm…. The kids do know I need to sleep at night, so they usually don’t come at dawn.”
“Master.”
Dojin stopped working and asked seriously.
“When was the last time you got angry?”
“…….”
“I mean really angry. So angry your head went cold and your chest felt chilled. No matter how broad-minded and kind you are, you’re not going to say you’ve never gotten angry even once in your life, right?”
At his disciple’s question, Iri lowered his gaze and searched his memories.
A time when his head went cold and his chest turned icy with anger.
One day came to mind.
There was no real reason to hide it from his disciple, so Iri answered honestly.
“During your kidnapping incident, I think.”
Dojin’s eyes flew wide open, clearly having never expected that answer.
“Kidnapping… you mean when I was kidnapped fifteen years ago?”
“Yeah.”
Dojin had been kidnapped once, when he was five years old. The culprits hadn’t been Wia—just humans.
The company where Dojin’s father was chairman had been locked in a battle with a rival firm over an overseas export deal, and the rival side had hired thugs to kidnap Dojin.
After meeting Iri, Dojin’s growth rate had become the same as a normal child’s, so outwardly he looked like nothing more than an adorable five-year-old. On top of that, that day he’d had one of Iri’s talismans stuck to his back as part of strength-control training. If not for the talisman, he wouldn’t have been kidnapped at all.
In fact, it was questionable whether the incident even deserved to be called a “kidnapping.”
Because just as the thugs loaded the child into a tinted SUV and were about to bind his hands and feet and put a blindfold on him, Iri had appeared and melted the car door.
No one knew what kind of mysterious Taoist art he’d used, but the moment Iri melted the door and quietly stared at them, the thugs calmly removed the ropes and blindfold as if it were the most natural thing in the world, gently supported the child, and handed him over to Iri.
‘Immortal….’
‘It’s okay now, Dojin.’
Dojin, who remembered every day he’d spent with Iri vividly, remembered that day so clearly he could’ve drawn it immediately. Looking a little dazed, he spoke.
“That day… you kept smiling kindly the whole time, Master.”
“Did I?”
“Yes. You were smiling so warmly. I had no idea you were angry at all. You hid it so I wouldn’t be scared, didn’t you?”
“Thinking my disciple was in danger made me very angry. It had been a long time since I’d felt that way.”
“You were really cool that day, Master.”
Dojin grinned broadly, then suddenly stiffened.
“Wait a second.”
“What is it?”
“When you say it’d been a long time, that means there was a time before that. Who made you that angry back then? If it’s comparable to my kidnapping, it must’ve been something incredibly important, right?”
Sometimes Dojin’s train of thought branched off in directions Iri never expected.
Still, there was no particular reason to hide the answer, so Iri replied honestly.
“A thousand years ago, when the True Mortal Realm and the Lower Realms declared war.”
Back then, the Lower Realm factions committed endless major and minor incidents, as if testing Iri’s patience. And when it finally escalated into war—one that would take place not in the True Mortal Realm nor the Lower Realms, but in the Middle Realm—he’d been especially angry.
Despite possessing omnipotent power, Iri rarely interfered in worldly affairs. But at that time, thinking the war needed to end quickly, he moved without even notifying the King.
“Right. You said you killed three of Princess Chalma’s direct subordinates then. The White Dragon, the Black Dragon, and the Gamaksan Divine Spirit. Right?”
Dojin’s eyes sparkled brightly. He clearly wanted to hear a heroic tale.
“Where did you hear those names?”
“Ihaeja told me recently. Apparently, by True Mortal Realm standards, the Black Dragon was Yama King–level, the White Dragon was Jade Emperor–level, and the Gamaksan Divine Spirit was Twelve Divine Generals–level. Princess Chalma must’ve been fucking terrified when you showed up carrying all three of their heads. If it were me, I’d surrender on the spot. At that point, it’s basically a half-annihilated force—no one would even feel like fighting anymore.”
Iri lowered his gaze and touched the black thread bracelet on his wrist. Dojin looked at him with eyes full of admiration.
“Even Ihaeja said she didn’t know how you took them down. You weren’t even a divine spirit back then, just a wandering soul. How did you kill them? Did you use a curio? Like the ‘Peach Branch’ or ‘Piwungdo’?”
“Let’s focus on our work.”
“Hm, fine. I’ll let it slide even if you dodge the question.”
When Iri shot him a look asking what was with that, Dojin replied with eyes slick as if coated in oil.
“You’re saying my kidnapping made you as angry as a declaration of war. That alone is enough for me.”
Like a beast expressing affection toward its handler, Dojin rubbed his shoulder against Iri.
“I really like you, Master. I seriously love you.”
“I love you too… as a disciple.”
“I don’t know why you felt the need to add that, but I even like that about you, so it’s fine.”
Just moments ago he’d been raging like fire; now Dojin was basking in contentment like a well-fed predator. Iri hadn’t intended this kind of mood shift, but he was relieved all the same. Especially since the very next consultation was, yet again, unrelated to curios…….
However, unlike Iri, Dojin hadn’t forgotten the original issue at all.
“Master.”
“Yes?”
“I’ll take care of those lazy Welfare Center people who are making someone as kind as you suffer.”
“How exactly are you planning to take care of it……?”
Iri frowned and looked at him. Dojin beamed brightly.
“Don’t worry. I won’t cause trouble. Just wait a little—I’ll handle it on my own!”
