While Cayden was deep in thoughts he didn’t understand, Amun had lost his words.
Ramon thought Amun was monitoring Cayden. He believed Amun was vigilantly controlling whether Cayden took suppressants or birth control pills. It wasn’t just Ramon. Everyone working in the separate palace thought so. It didn’t make sense that Amun, the Crown Prince’s most cherished errand boy, wouldn’t know about such matters.
Cayden didn’t think Amun was monitoring him. But he also hadn’t expected him to know absolutely nothing about it.
When speaking with Ramon, Amun had appeared to know nothing about suppressants or similar topics.
Amun was a child who spoke well. However, he wouldn’t carelessly speak about things he didn’t properly understand. That’s why he couldn’t respond to Ramon and just kept his mouth shut. With his face turning bright red.
Cayden glanced at Amun’s face. He was still deep in thought. But there was more light in his eyes than before.
“It’s preposterous.”
“…Huh?”
Cayden asked back when Amun suddenly made eye contact. It was because he was surprised.
Cayden quickly straightened his posture. It was because Amun, who had been in a daze, now looked completely alert.
“A person with a spouse, someone who has their spouse within arm’s reach, having to take suppressants every day… heat cycle suppressants and such, it’s strange. Not just suppressants. Along with other things… It’s nonsensical.”
“…”
“His Highness the Crown Prince doesn’t take such things.”
“Well, because they’re not good for health… Of course he shouldn’t.”
“Is that obvious?”
Assad, with a grimace, asked Cayden.
“Of course.”
Cayden smiled, albeit awkwardly. It was to try to calm Amun, who was inexplicably starting to get excited.
“What about Sir Cayden’s health?”
“…”
“Is only His Highness’s body precious? Is it acceptable for Sir Cayden’s body to be damaged and broken?”
Amun’s subdued voice echoed in the bedroom. His voice, as cold as his expression, was clear and not buried by the sound of rain at all.
“I’m… okay. I’m so robust that I’ve never properly caught a cold. Really. And even if something happens to my traits, I can just… get over it. After all, there were many problems to begin with. Maybe it would be more convenient if my heat cycle never came again. But it’s different for the Crown Prince. Healthy traits must not be damaged. He must be careful.”
Cayden gave Amun an explanation that wasn’t really an explanation. He wanted to appease Amun, who was showing a mysterious emotion that could have been anger or sadness.
Taking suppressants was such an obvious thing. It was also a familiar routine. Even in the north, he had taken heat cycle suppressants and medications given by the young master almost daily.
There was something uncomfortable about Amun suddenly becoming concerned about such a trivial matter. He just wished he wouldn’t.
“Amun, you’ll learn this later, but they say an omega’s heat cycle is more dangerous than an alpha’s. That’s why suppressants are more necessary for me than for the Crown Prince.”
“What’s dangerous about it?”
“Children… They say children are more likely to be conceived.”
Cayden said after hesitating. He felt awkward because he wasn’t Amun’s teacher, and he wondered if it was alright to talk about such things.
“Children…”
Amun tried the short word in his mouth.
“That doesn’t suit the Crown Prince at all, does it? He’s so young.”
Cayden vaguely brushed aside the topic. He wanted to get away from this subject quickly.
“It’s not strange for a formally married couple to have children.”
“…”
“Isn’t it rather a good thing? Why try so hard to prevent it, even at the cost of damaging one’s health…”
Amun muttered. It was close to a soliloquy uttered while lost in thought.
That was true too. But if he inserted himself and Assad into Amun’s narrative, it would become untrue. For a couple bound together with a predetermined end to have a child… wouldn’t that be too strange?
Even the love between them was one-sided. A child would be a shining blessing for one person, a musty nightmare for the other. Cayden didn’t want to give Assad a nightmare.
Cayden lowered his head. Talking about children made him feel strange. Just imagining it made him scared and breathless. What would happen if the Crown Prince’s consort, who was meant to disappear, were to have a child? It wouldn’t be good. He could guess that much.
“…If they didn’t take after me, maybe it would be okay.”
“What? That’s not how it works. They should take after both parents equally.”
No, they should not take after me to be somewhat loved. Cayden thought. But there was no need to reveal his pitiful inner thoughts to Amun. Cayden answered with a smile instead.
Cayden became an adult without ever receiving love from anyone. He knew well how lonely childhood solitude was, how empty and desolate that unfillable void could be.
Anyway, it was just a meaningless fantasy.
He wasn’t Assad’s match. When left alone, Assad would welcome a beautiful bride again. Assad’s child would appear in the world amidst sparkling love and blessings. Surely, they would be a very pretty and lovable child resembling him.
Cayden didn’t want to mar Assad’s perfectly crafted life. He didn’t want to become Assad’s blemish. So he had to be careful. Taking medication every day was nothing.
“Sir Cayden.”
“Yes?”
“Those things the gloomy-looking doctor said… His Highness probably doesn’t know.”
In the brief silence that followed, Amun bit his lip. Then he opened his mouth again.
“He wouldn’t want your body to be harmed. Truly.”
Amun’s eyebrows drooped as if aggrieved. Another statement was immediately added.
“You can believe me.”
Would not want. Amun’s words were speculation, not certainty. It was a tone unlike him, who preferred certainty.
“Yes. I’ll believe you.”
Still… Cayden decided to believe Amun’s words. No, he wanted to believe them.
“I think so too.”
Cayden said in a whisper. He wished that Assad’s true heart was the same as Amun’s hope. Cayden wished for it. He smiled softly, thinking himself childish.
Cayden’s smile made Amun feel relieved.
Silence descended upon the bedroom. It was because the intensified sound of rain had stolen their voices away.
It was the first day announcing the beginning of a ten-day rainy season.
* * *
“Why on earth, at this hour… for what reason…”
Chamberlain Saban was dumbfounded as he faced Assad, who had invaded his bedroom.
It was a dark night after midnight. There had been times when he rushed out of his bedroom after hearing that the Crown Prince had caused trouble, but this was the first time Assad himself had directly visited Saban’s quarters.
Saban was scared, wondering what on earth he had done to come like this.
…Did he end up killing someone after all?
Feeling as if his already white hair was turning even whiter, Saban hastily let Assad into his bedroom.
Assad seemed to have no intention of sitting down. Standing face to face with the somewhat anxious Crown Prince, Saban maintained a respectful posture and waited only for Assad to open his mouth. No, he didn’t even wait. Because Assad immediately poured out his words.
The story that came from the mouth of the fierce-faced Crown Prince was something Saban had never anticipated.
“You scolded me, saying I should never put suppressants or the like in my mouth.”
“Pardon?”
“Then why. My bride’s mouth. Why are you putting medications that shouldn’t go into that mouth every day?”
The excited Assad fired at the chamberlain.
“Even if I want to mix bod-, no, even though we don’t share a bed, why feed birth control pills?”
“…”
“Saban. I didn’t know this. I had no idea, not even in dreams, that my partner was shoving heat cycle suppressants and such, such things down his throat.”
“…Your Highness, the heir of Helio does not have children before three years have passed after the wedding ceremony. It’s a secret law of the imperial family.”
Saban informed Assad, who had a stunned expression, of an old law of the imperial family, an implicit rule.
During the 200 years since the companion oracle was broken, various problems had occurred. Since it was a strategic marriage between two people bound by a false oracle, various variables were inevitable. The contents were also diverse, including political issues and infidelity.
Thus, the imperial family began to check against seeing children early from the heir. The time of stepping back and distancing from the spouse gradually lengthened, reaching the point of having to fill three years.
“The consorts who welcome the heir of Helio as their spouse must all take suppressants and birth control pills, regardless of their traits. This fact was conveyed to the Crown Prince’s consort before and after Your Highness’s first heat cycle.”
“Such…”
Assad’s words became faint.
“You asked why you weren’t informed. It’s because it’s not a matter for Your Highness to be concerned about, so you weren’t told.”
“…”
“Having to care about matters after the heat cycle and sexual intercourse is not the role of the Emperor and his heir. It’s the business of the Crown Prince’s consort, the Crown Princess’s consort, and Her Majesty the Empress.”
A heavy silence settled between Assad and Saban. Over Assad’s beautiful face, which still looked young to the elderly chamberlain’s eyes, a distress utterly unsuited to him fell.
“But Cayden and my case is different…”
“…”
“He doesn’t have a family on his back, or even a family to look after him. Maternal relatives can’t cause problems. He’s not the type to create problems himself. If someone were to cause problems, it would be me, not him.”
Assad spoke to Saban. But even that abruptly stopped at some point.
In the brief silence that followed, Assad moved his lips. Soon, a voice like a faint sigh squeezed out between his lips.
“I…”
“…”
“I don’t want to act like a fool when it comes to the Crown Prince’s consort’s affairs, Cayden’s affairs. Knowing nothing, like an idiot…”
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
