In Assad’s embrace, Cayden noticed something unusual about his heart. He felt a tremor that enveloped his entire body, as if begging for his feelings to be understood. Thump. Thump. He felt joy spreading with each heartbeat and heat warming his cheeks.
Ignoring that clamorous sound, Cayden watched the dancers’ graceful movements.
The coolness from the magic-infused stone, the musicians’ performance, and the dancers’ movements were all pleasant. Yet somehow, his heart kept growing dim. It seemed he was the type of person who shouldn’t set foot in crowded places.
Cayden knew what was dampening his mood.
“Among the royal family gathered at this boring banquet, there’s probably no one who doesn’t know you’re a three-year bride.”
The secret that Jahan Mekerius had shared kept prodding him.
Would it have been better to live with just a vague assumption that he would someday be driven away, only to be suddenly pushed out one day? Feeling suffocated like someone who had been given a death date, it seemed he had grown quite attached to Helio and the people who cared for him.
That didn’t mean he desired to stay longer in the imperial palace. If you don’t expect anything, you won’t be disappointed. One shouldn’t hope for impossible things.
Lost in thought, Cayden stole a glance at the man who had his arm around his shoulder. But when their eyes met, he quickly lowered his gaze back to its original position.
He felt shy. He found himself absently touching the ring on his fourth finger—not the ring that the fierce-faced man had placed on him during the wedding ceremony, but the ring given to him by the man who had visited him in the dark of night.
For some reason… it made him smile.
‘Assad will soon forget me. But I will never forget him for the rest of my life.’
Thinking this made him feel awkward.
Cayden tried to hide the small smile that appeared on his face. It must look ridiculous.
Assad wasn’t the only one he would never forget. The scenery and people of Helio, the good memories they had given him, would stay with him forever. How could he forget the peace, kindness, gentleness, and affection he would never encounter again in his remaining life? He would long for them until his final moments facing death.
Cayden remained silent.
And finally, he calmly realized one thing. Looking at the heart revealed when given the day of departure.
‘I… like that man.’
Cayden slowly caressed the emotion he had been unconsciously feeling, the unfamiliar feeling that had ignited without his knowledge.
He smiled. His feelings seemed so pathetic and ridiculous.
Assad was someone he didn’t know well. How could he have fallen in love when he knew so little about him? Had he fallen for his appearance? Or had he given his heart to Assad’s meaningless kindness? Either way, it was laughable.
How had it come to this? He had no idea where it had all gone wrong.
But he couldn’t forcibly gather back the feelings that had already leaked out. Cayden didn’t bother denying his feelings.
Perhaps they were easier to accept because he expected nothing in return.
The feelings he had developed for Assad were like a flower that had bloomed by mistake in an abandoned room. If left alone, it would wither on its own in a place without sunlight or water.
Cayden knew the end of his feelings. That’s why he felt neither perplexed nor made a fuss.
He didn’t hope for his feelings to be reciprocated. Nor did he wish for more days to stay in Helio. Cayden merely wished that Assad wouldn’t discover his impure feelings. He didn’t want to be hated by him.
The loud heartbeat that seemed to beg for his existence to be acknowledged, the tickling sensation, the heat—all subsided quietly.
“If you want to look, look properly. Why suddenly run away? Or do you have something to say?”
Assad drew closer to Cayden, who remained silent while avoiding his eyes.
Their bodies became so close that Cayden’s cooled body and Assad’s could not possibly get any closer. Only then did Assad give a mischievous smile to Cayden, who finally looked at him again.
“…No.”
Unable to fully meet his eyes, Cayden shifted his gaze to somewhere around Assad’s shoulder.
“Why were you looking at me then? Because I’m too handsome? Too beautiful?”
Faced with this brazen question, Cayden looked at Assad again. He wondered if he had misheard.
And he immediately realized that he had heard correctly. The face of the man who described himself as beautiful showed no trace of embarrassment or modesty.
“…Yes.”
Nodding, Cayden gave a straightforward answer to the ever-confident Assad. This moment, too, would remain in his memory for a long time. Thinking this, he inadvertently gave a bland answer.
Assad was silent for a while. He just stared at Cayden. He didn’t seem upset. So Cayden wasn’t afraid.
“Then… keep looking.”
This time, Assad turned his head forward first.
What if he thought I was flirting? Cayden belatedly regretted his actions and response. Embarrassment turned the tips of his ears red.
He couldn’t take back or correct the answer he had already given. It might look stranger if he changed his words out of panic.
Cayden simply took in the sight of Assad, who was no longer looking at him. He thought it would be nice if the last face of Assad he saw before leaving Helio was like now.
With a face that looked somewhat sulky and indifferent but actually had a trace of his inherent kindness—he hoped Assad would bid him farewell with such a face.
It was a futile thought. He would leave Helio without even seeing his face, let alone receiving a farewell. Quickly bowing his head, Cayden changed the thoughts floating in his mind.
Cayden recalled when he had been driven from the farm. He had been loaded onto a cart before dawn. This was after being severely beaten by workers who had received the Count’s orders. He had neither the strength nor time to gather his already meager belongings.
Still, here, it seemed violence wouldn’t accompany the farewell. Though he would have to become a dead person and wouldn’t have time to say goodbye to those who had been kind to him. If Jahan’s words were true, he would receive money too. At least he wouldn’t have to worry about homelessness.
Cayden lowered his gaze to the dancers on the stage below the platform.
The long fabric wrapping the dancers’ hands moved as smoothly as flowing water. Absurdly, the image of Assad wielding a sword in the training ground casually overlapped with it.
Liking someone… is it always like this, thinking about one person over and over again?
It seemed like such a confusing and difficult thing.
‘I must be careful not to get caught.’
In the midst of a lukewarm confusion that was difficult to express, Cayden closed his eyes for a moment. He didn’t notice that Assad was staring at him intently, or that he had somehow been held more firmly in his embrace.
- The Joy Period
Assad was sitting on the sofa in his office. With his head tilted while half-lying down, white papers were strewn messily around him.
One sheet of paper was also held in Assad’s hand. It was a kind of personal specification sheet with a rough portrait close to a montage drawn in pencil. The ones scattered on the floor and sofa were likewise similar, though the people depicted and the stories inscribed in them differed.
Assad stared intently at the paper he held. It was concise yet definitive material, imbued with the craftsmanship of the minions employed by the Empire’s crown prince. Even if it had taken some time to reach him.
All the individuals whose lives were displayed on the soft paper were adult men. They were figures that Cayden might have encountered in the art district on the day when a large market had been set up beyond the outer wall.
“Why did he suddenly run off after seeing some man? Just like someone escaping!”
The guard in the art district had said he saw a man.
Assad believed that the person who made Cayden flee had come from Elba. There was no way Cayden would have suddenly run away after seeing a stranger with whom he had no acquaintance.
Cayden was the type of person who would steadfastly remain in place even if someone stood before him, spouting nonsense and picking a fight, or disgustingly flirting with him. Because Amun had told him to wait there. Because he had promised to do so. Despite his restlessness, he wouldn’t have thought of leaving his spot.
Moreover, the guard from the merchant group he had assigned, no, the fool, had explained that the man chasing Cayden didn’t look like a Helio person. With a fair and pretty face, he had said.
He didn’t entirely trust the testimony of the dim-witted man who couldn’t even properly protect one docile Cayden. But the fellow had seemed quite perplexed. There was no reason for him to lie to Assad while sweating profusely.
Assad removed the Helio people from the materials he had received. To find those who came from Elba, he left only outsiders who had never stayed for a long time in Helio’s central district or the capital city of Acro. He threw the documents on the floor one by one and continued to examine the names and profiles of those who remained.
And then… he came across a man who was particularly irritating.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
