Maybe it was because of the fever, or maybe because of sleepiness, but his hoarse voice felt particularly fragile.
“You can call me by name.”
Actually, if you thought about it, it was a dangerous situation. Just the two of them alone in the pitch-black dawn. Moreover, Jasper was in pajamas without even a coat, so his skin showed slightly through. But amazingly, he didn’t have any thoughts at all. Despite being cautious that he might have different feelings if such a situation arose, it was all for nothing.
He had thought that perhaps the things Kalix had seen weren’t real but just delusions, and that they might be manifestations of desires Kalix unconsciously had. But to say that was the case, his heart looking at Jasper now was too stable.
Perhaps because of that, Jasper looked a little pitiful too. While Kalix had been avoiding Jasper, Jasper had done nothing wrong. Not before, not now. But he felt a little sorry for having shown too much of an ignoring attitude until now.
“Yeah. You too.”
With the quietly uttered answer, Jasper glanced up at Kalix.
“Do you know my name?”
Of course he knew. Even setting aside that Kalix had originally known Jasper, since he was Alexander’s brother, he naturally had to know. Moreover, now he even knew that Alexander’s brother was named Frederick. There was no way he wouldn’t know Jasper’s name.
“Jasper.”
So when he just uttered that name, Jasper nodded and looked forward again while walking, then slowly lowered his head. Alexander didn’t look down when walking. He always looked straight ahead and walked upright, but Jasper was the complete opposite.
He had felt it from the beginning, but Alexander and Jasper really didn’t resemble each other not just in appearance but in atmosphere. Jasper somehow had a melancholic atmosphere about him, while Alexander was not like that at all. Even brothers could look completely different, but usually when they grew up together, their atmospheres would be similar.
Moreover, he couldn’t understand why Jasper had a melancholic atmosphere. Though he was illegitimate, his relationship with his family wasn’t bad. Even if he was shy, he couldn’t have grown up being abused. If that had been the case, Alexander would have felt some discomfort when dealing with Jasper, but even during the time when everything was just suspicion, he had never felt that way.
“How did you get to know Sasha?”
At Jasper’s sudden question, Kalix thought for a moment.
“Just, in passing. Somehow it happened.”
But that was all he could say. It was actually like that too. Since there wasn’t much to add, when he ended his words like that, Jasper’s voice was heard.
“Sasha makes friends well. At some point you’d see someone beside him. I can’t do that, so it’s amazing. He showed no signs so I didn’t know, but when I came during break, he suddenly said he was dating someone. I was curious who it was, but Sky is also a really good person.”
It was the first time hearing Alexander’s story from Jasper’s mouth. Before that, he had only known that Jasper didn’t get along particularly well with his family. Since the purpose was to use that, he hadn’t bothered to ask more about family matters.
But what he actually learned was quite different. As much as Alexander cared about Jasper, Jasper also relied on Alexander.
“Sasha has a good personality, stands out, everyone likes him, and he’s skilled at everything.”
While his tone was calm, somehow his intonation was low. At that voice that seemed somewhat resigned, Kalix asked,
“Are you envious?”
Could it be an inferiority complex? At that question, Jasper looked up at Kalix.
“No.”
Then a smile finally bloomed on that expression that had been subdued the whole time.
“I’m proud. Because he’s family.”
What filled that expression was truly just Jasper’s words. Being proud of his brother, literally. Kalix now really had to acknowledge it. Alexander and Jasper were a little closer than other brothers, but they didn’t go beyond that range.
He had known for sure that Alexander was like that, but he couldn’t be certain about Jasper. But now he really had to realize it. Misunderstanding the relationship between Alexander and Jasper was definitely Kalix’s mistake.
* * *
“Ah, Sasha,”
What is this? But what, what is this? Kalix, who had been frozen in shock, quickly came to his senses and closed the door without making a sound. Then, worried that his footsteps might make noise, Kalix couldn’t go anywhere and just stood there blankly in front of it.
He remembered. That such a thing had happened, when it actually occurred, he recalled. The break had been just peaceful, and Kalix had been quite stable too. Nothing had happened since the coming-of-age ceremony, and it was the same after winter break ended and he returned to the Academy. Now he didn’t get as tense as before even when seeing Marcel or Jasper. So he hadn’t kept recalling what happened at what point.
But yes, such a thing had happened. When he thought back, it was like that. But back then it was different. Back then Kalix and Jasper shared a room. As soon as he realized Jasper was masturbating, he immediately opened the door and went in, then proceeded with what came next.
So whose name Jasper would call after that, he had no idea about such things. But even so, surely he must have heard wrong. Surely.
Kalix first carefully moved his steps and escaped the corridor. Surely not. He’s his brother. How could he have such thoughts about his brother, how could he think of his brother while… That shouldn’t happen. And it wasn’t like that. That day, after meeting in the corridor, he couldn’t meet Jasper until the break ended. Jasper didn’t particularly come looking for Alexander either. So he thought the misunderstanding during that time was really a misunderstanding. But it wasn’t that, and his first impression was really right?
“CC, did you find it?”
At the question that suddenly reached him, when he reflexively checked, it was Alexander. Even in a dazed state, he had faithfully moved his steps and came to the lobby. They had been together, and it was on the way back after Kalix had briefly gone to get something he still hadn’t brought from Alexander’s room.
“Should I go look for it?”
Alexander asked, puzzled that Kalix’s attitude had suddenly become strange when he had said he would bring something, but Kalix immediately answered that voice.
“No.”
“What?”
He had answered quickly at first, but when Alexander asked back, his mind went blank.
“No, it’s not that. I found it. Don’t go in.”
That was all he could say. It was hard to find more words to make up. But Alexander absolutely must not enter that room right now. Kalix couldn’t accurately grasp what kind of situation that had been either, but anyway, he mustn’t.
“You didn’t bring anything though?”
“No. I found it.”
“Did you put it in your room?”
“Yeah. So don’t go.”
Since it sounded suspicious no matter how you heard it, Alexander also looked at Kalix as if puzzled. But suddenly, Kalix realized something.
“Alex, did you get shorter?”
Certainly last fall, when he first saw him, Alexander and Kalix’s heights were almost the same. But now, their eye levels were subtly different.
“CC, obviously you grew taller, didn’t you?”
Even at the voice that contained some exasperation, Kalix looked at Alexander intently. Alexander had killed Kalix around the end of sophomore year. There was still about a year and a half left from then, and certainly their eye levels were similar then too. Back then his height hadn’t particularly grown, but why was it different now? Was it because this was really his body?
“Alex, why don’t you go out these days? Since you broke up, Maggie said it’s her turn now and told us to bring you quickly.”
While Kalix was lost in thought, at the voice that suddenly came toward Alexander, Kalix identified the owner of that voice. It was Alexander’s friend whom he had often seen together with Alexander. His name was probably Philip. The owner of the clothes Kalix had borrowed on the first day.
“Maggie?”
Alexander’s voice asking back was casual, but Kalix couldn’t help but be shocked. Why isn’t he denying it? Just now Alexander clearly said he broke up. Why isn’t he saying it’s a misunderstanding?
“She’s made up her mind.”
When Alexander laughed briefly at Philip’s words, Philip shrugged once.
“Anyway, that’s what she says.”
Philip seemed to be heading up to his room with those final words, moving his steps across the lobby. Kalix watched that figure for a moment, then confirmed there were no people around and immediately asked Alexander.
“What does that mean?”
At the sudden question, Alexander looked at Kalix, but Kalix immediately continued asking.
“Did you break up? Why?”
“Why, Sky left.”
“Then, then that’s the end?”
“Then what?”
He was momentarily speechless. Alexander didn’t seem to have any pain from heartbreak, he just seemed completely unbothered. When he had liked her so much, when they had even gone to the villa together?
“What, meet later and get married, or can’t see each other now but later marriage, something like that?”
“CC, are you really a prince?”
Without any sarcastic tone, it was really a look of amazement. When Kalix instantly frowned, Alexander said flatly,
“We knew from the beginning anyway. We knew Sky was transferring from when we started dating, so we had said from the start that we’d date until here. It was closer to just being together because we were comfortable with each other rather than really dating.”
It was ridiculous.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
