#85
Kang Ye-ryeong had tried, even then, to give Hyun-oh the affection she couldn’t give before when his eyes looked at her as if she were an inanimate object.
However, a deep furrow that seemed impossible to cross had already been formed between Hyun-oh and her.
“It’s this incompetent mother’s fault. That Hyun-oh grew up to be so cold and dull that he can’t even properly recognize his own emotions.”
They say you need to have received love to be able to give it.
Although that saying seemed to fit Hyun-oh, looking at Eunsol made her realize it wasn’t a rule that applied to everyone.
So she felt even more pitiful, and guilty as if everything were her fault.
“…My child. I want both of you to be happy.”
Hyun-oh was the son she had given birth to with pain, and Eunsol had somehow become like a son born from her heart.
When she suddenly realized how Hyun-oh had endlessly hurt Eunsol, she had even considered adopting Eunsol as her own child.
While concerned that Eunsol might feel indebted because of her words, the feeling of wanting to ask him to forgive Hyun-oh just once was as uncomfortable as having a heavy stone placed on her chest.
Eunsol just quietly listened to Ye-ryeong’s words.
He had always been a child whose inner thoughts showed transparently, but at this moment, it was difficult to guess what he was thinking, as if a thick fog had set in.
“Was I talking too much? Should I lower the bed back down?”
She needed to stop here for today. Saying more would just be her own selfishness. Besides, Eunsol was in a situation where he needed to stabilize his mind and body as much as possible.
Afterwards, Ye-ryeong silently kept him company until Eunsol comfortably lay down and became immersed in the wave of sleepiness that came over him again.
Between his dimming consciousness, an affectionate hand settled on his crown, gently stroking.
Eunsol closed his eyes peacefully, feeling the warm care of a parent that he had only ever imagined.
* * *
“…Eunsol.”
The affectionate voice and touch Eunsol felt in his sleep one day wasn’t his imagination. Above all, he couldn’t mistake the pheromones that warmly enveloped his body even before he regained consciousness.
It was a pheromone that always felt refreshing yet strangely cool. It was definitely the same scent, but now it felt as cozy as being covered with a blanket infused with the fresh pine scent.
“The baby is growing well, they say. You… handled the emergency situation well. I should have been by your side and the baby’s… but I wasn’t. I’m sorry.”
Was he always this talkative?
Standing at the boundary between consciousness and unconsciousness, Eunsol carefully listened to the voice that drifted to his ears like a spring breeze.
It wasn’t the first time Hyun-oh had apologized to him, but the apology he was offering now felt more sincere than ever before.
Looking at just the current situation, it almost seemed like he was clinging to Eunsol.
Yet it had always been Eunsol who watched his back, immersed in sadness.
The reversed relationship felt strange and unfamiliar, making him want to run away.
“It’s okay. There’s nothing here that will harm you.”
However Hyun-oh interpreted the unstable pheromones conveying his anxious feelings, he carefully took Eunsol’s hand.
That’s when something amazing happened.
Just moments ago, Hyun-oh’s changed behavior had made him uncomfortable, making him want to run away and hide where no one could see him.
But the moment the gentle warmth touched him, the desire to quietly nestle in his arms grew even stronger.
Sometimes, while wandering through unconsciousness, Eunsol felt a pain as if the inside of his stomach was tightly knotted. This sensation became especially strong when memories of the accident loomed like nightmares in his dreams.
Being in a dream state, there was nothing Eunsol could do. He could only desperately cry out silent screams to the baby, asking it to hang on, saying he was sorry.
Even now, a mild pain was beginning to rise in his lower abdomen due to emotions that were still difficult to face head-on.
But the moment Hyun-oh took his hand and shared his warmth, it vanished like fog dissipating in the rising sun.
“I’m here by your side.”
Why was it that those words left a resonance in his heart that would be remembered forever?
Suddenly, he wanted to open his eyes and ask him.
If those words were true. If he would stay by his side forever from now on.
If he no longer had to tremble in fear, worrying about when he would be abandoned by him.
Now… one corner of his chest tingled with curiosity about whether he was ready to face their baby together.
“So don’t suffer alone anymore. …I’m not asking for forgiveness. Just give me a chance to make up for all the time I’ve done wrong.”
All the words that followed seemed so unrealistic that he still wondered if he was immersed in a dream.
Just as Eunsol was gathering courage to open his eyes.
He felt sunlight spreading through the window placed on one side of the hospital room. Time had passed before he knew it.
“Get your treatment today, don’t skip meals. …I’ll come again when you’re asleep.”
Like Cinderella who disappears when the clock strikes twelve, Hyun-oh left while Eunsol was about to wake up.
Even after hearing the sound of the door opening and closing, it was quite some time before Eunsol slowly opened his eyes.
His eyes, accustomed to the darkness all night, perceived even the faint light seeping in as a major stimulus.
Tears rolled down like beads along his slightly furrowed eyes.
With the tears, the dazzling sensation also subsided.
What filled his eyes as they gradually came into focus was not Hyun-oh, whom he had missed even at the moment of his departure, but only a cold, empty chair.
‘…Just stay by my side.’
At the sudden thought, Eunsol opened his eyes wide.
Hyun-oh was a busy person. Even now, it was hard to believe it was real that he was watching over him while he slept.
Since he didn’t show himself during the time Eunsol was awake, he was surely using that time to work, but then when did he even sleep?
It was a natural question.
“You’re awake. Did you sleep well last night?”
However, his train of thought had to pause momentarily as Ye-ryeong opened the hospital room door and entered.
Eunsol slowly blinked his eyelashes so Ye-ryeong could see. He had learned to communicate this way when he didn’t have the strength to hold the tablet PC.
“Here. Write down anything you want to say.”
There should be professional caregivers. Yet when he was unconscious, Hyun-oh volunteered for the job, and when he woke up, Ye-ryeong naturally filled the vacancy.
He felt uneasy, wondering if it was right for him to enjoy such luxury. After contemplating, Eunsol finally wrote what he wanted to say on the tablet PC screen.
[Mother you must be tired what about calling a c-aregiver]
Ye-ryeong, who had been closely watching to see what he wanted to say as soon as he opened his eyes, took Eunsol’s hand and shook her head.
“I’m doing this because I want to. Are you very uncomfortable?”
Eunsol hurriedly shook his head. For a moment, Ye-ryeong’s expression had seemed so pitiful that her eyes wavered.
His feeling of apology was greater than any discomfort. He knew well that neither she nor Hyun-oh were people who should be doing this kind of work.
Though not as much as Hyun-oh, Ye-ryeong was also a busy person. She had to handle the business she had inherited from her maternal side, and her social calendar was filled quarterly.
It hadn’t been a short time since Eunsol’s accident, so he couldn’t keep Ye-ryeong tied to his side indefinitely.
It also felt unrealistic that she was acting like a child who had committed a grave mistake and was gauging her parents’ reaction.
Then Eunsol realized he still hadn’t been able to meet Ryu Jeong-woo.
[When can I see Jeong-woo hyung]
He had mentioned wanting to see him before, but both Eunsol and Ryu Jeong-woo were in poor condition, making it impossible to move hastily.
“He has regained consciousness, but he’s also in a situation where he needs maximum stability. You two are exactly alike. As soon as Jeong-woo opened his eyes, he asked about you.”
Eunsol exhaled a long breath. It was a relief that Ryu Jeong-woo was recovering.
He wanted to move and go see him right away, but Eunsol too was in a similar situation where he could barely move properly even in bed.
“You might be able to chat via messenger. Would you like to do that at least?”
A phone call would also be possible, but since Eunsol currently couldn’t speak properly, using a messenger would be better for free communication.
Eunsol nodded slightly.
Ye-ryeong made a call somewhere and then took the tablet PC that was placed in front of Eunsol.
“I’ll connect you now, so make sure the other side is set up too.”
After hanging up the phone, she opened the messenger app that was installed on the tablet PC.
“Do you remember your ID and password?”
As Eunsol was about to nod his head in affirmation, Ye-ryeong stopped him.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
