#66. Size or Direction (6)
“What?”
Na Jihan stopped eating and looked at Hapil Jae. My fork, which had been tormenting an innocent olive, also stopped abruptly at a similar timing.
“No, but you know, when I look at what Jihan hyung does, sometimes he’s like a little kid who acts difficult toward someone he likes and ends up being hated? Usually he’s sickeningly sweet, but then he does that once in a while.”
“…”
“The day you two fought, Seowoo hyung brought flowers home, and that was from Bae Dojin sunbae-nim, right? To thank him for being a guest all this time.”
“Right.”
“Every time Jihan hyung saw the flowers in the living room, he looked at them like they were his mortal enemy. As if the flowers had committed some crime against Jihan hyung. Seeing him sulk just because someone else gave you a gift is so childish. It’s not like he’s some jealous kid. So I’m asking if he likes you?”
Na Jihan frowned deeply. His attitude suggested he couldn’t understand what Hapil Jae was saying at all.
“What nonsense are you talking about in the middle of eating?”
His attitude was as if he’d really heard something completely absurd. Hapil Jae scratched his nose and replied jokingly.
“Well, it is nonsense, right? No matter how much you two give each other goosebumps. Being the same members, both guys, and even lifelong friends…”
“How could I dislike Yoon Seowoo? Isn’t that stranger?”
“Ugh.”
Hapil Jae shook his head as if he was fed up.
“Fine, fine. Let’s just drop it. I don’t know why people who like each other fight.”
I muttered as if making an excuse.
“I won’t show any awkward moments in front of the cameras.”
“You better not.”
He said while putting cabbage pickle on my spoon.
“You can’t sit at opposite ends of the sofa like when you bicker at the dorm. You hyungs are already heavily marketed as being close, so even the slightest friction shows. You know that, right?”
Since the relationship was built on friendship, people’s expectations about it were bound to be strict. It was obvious that even slightly awkward behavior would raise rumors of discord.
I know. This is just a minor quarrel, and if I soften my heart a little, we’ll return to our usual selves as if nothing happened.
But a corner of my heart was still stubbornly knotted. I was annoyed at Na Jihan for telling me to like him for convenience when he doesn’t even like me.
I knew it was a very childish thought, but this time I didn’t want to be the first to bow down and give in. Not until I heard him say he was sorry for speaking carelessly.
“I’ll try.”
“While not giving Jihan hyung even a glance?”
As soon as I cautiously raised my head, I met Na Jihan’s eyes. It was a sullen gaze as if he’d been waiting for me to look. There wasn’t even a hint of remorse.
In the end, I turned my head away again. Even though I knew in my head that I had to somehow resolve this awkward atmosphere in just a few hours, I was recklessly pushing that task onto my future self.
* * *
“Change on the opposite side.”
At the hanbok costume room we arrived at for filming preparation. While checking the clothes we’d ordered and waiting our turn to change one by one, Na Jihan wrapped his arm around my shoulder, turned me around, and pointed to the dressing room on the complete opposite side from where he’d come out.
“Lee Seon is still over there…”
Our upper bodies pressed close together and the distance disappeared instantly. There wasn’t even time to feel awkward.
“This side is too narrow. And dark too.”
“Then I’ll use it first. Is that okay?”
“Sure. I actually had some makeup I wanted to try on Haesol-ssi anyway. Could you come out after changing into that?”
“Understood.”
How spacious could a dressing room be? Of course, dark and cramped wasn’t ideal, but we couldn’t complain about every little thing while working.
“You’ll be hot once you put on the clothes, so cool down your body in advance.”
“Ah.”
The moment the cooling pack touched my neck, my body instinctively shrank. Because Na Jihan’s large hand that had gone down my back was firmly holding my waist, I couldn’t pull away or avoid it.
The tension in my body, which had stiffened in surprise, slowly relaxed.
It was the height of sweltering midsummer. Even after sunset, the air was practically boiling due to tropical nights, so we kept the air conditioning on all day except when ventilating.
This was outdoor filming in such weather. Since we chose based on color and aesthetics rather than function or temperature comfort, it was obvious we’d be hot once we got dressed. Indeed, Hapil Jae, who had finished changing and was in the middle of makeup, had his face all scrunched up.
“It’s stuffy!”
“Bear with it. Lee Seon is even wearing a wig in this weather.”
“…I suddenly feel cool. Thank you.”
I don’t get hot as easily, so I wasn’t too worried, but it wouldn’t hurt to be cooled down.
As I stayed still in his hold, Na Jihan’s eyes softened gently.
“Finally being a bit docile. You were always looking around nervously and running away.”
I was about to answer that I had good reason to, but I pressed my lips shut. It was because there were two cameras in the costume room for behind-the-scenes filming.
“…When did I ever.”
“When?”
Na Jihan also seemed conscious of the cameras as he smiled broadly, raising the corners of his mouth. It was an expression he didn’t usually make. When he was truly happy, his eyes curved more softly and the corners of his mouth went deeper.
Knowing him capable of warmer and more wonderful expressions, I should have been unmoved by this level of smile…
‘Annoying.’
The problem was that even this broadcast smile looked good to me because it was the first smiling face I’d seen in days. My heart was beating wildly and a corner of my chest felt ticklish.
“You’d be better off not wearing the gat.”
“Why?”
I fiddled with the cooling pack cooling my nape while glancing at the prop shelf. Gat with different decorations hung from the top shelf.
One of them was Na Jihan’s, and the inp-yeong hanging down looked exactly like a sparkling constellation thanks to the thin, delicate black bamboo branches and amber beads. It was as I had recommended in advance, thinking it would match amazingly well with Na Jihan’s hanbok done in black and gold.
My portion, prepared additionally, was similar yet slightly different. Instead of black bamboo, bright-colored bamboo branches, and beads strung like a clear blue sky.
“Your face is too cute so it won’t suit you.”
Instead of answering, I hit Na Jihan with my clenched fist.
“What are you saying? How old am I? How can a person my age be cute?”
“But it’s true. I’m going to let my hair down and Hapil is adding jeweled decorations for a fusion hanbok feel so it’ll be fine, but you’d have that ambiguous in-between feeling. Just don’t wear it and only put on the clothes. That would be better.”
The two coordinators who were busily tidying Ahn Haesol’s appearance chattered.
“I agree with Jihan-ssi too. We tried matching the gat since you two have similar clothes, but not wearing it would give a brighter and softer image, I think?”
“But isn’t it a waste? He’d look like a handsome young master from a wealthy family and be pretty. Originally, people with fair and refined faces really suit hanbok when they wear it.”
“That’s true. And this inp-yeong, we had a hard time making it by searching for each material. Just in case, how about taking it with you and trying it during behind-the-scenes later?”
“That sounds good. Since we can’t mess up the hair, let’s do the main filming as set.”
Listening to that conversation, Na Jihan showed interest in the gat. With his hand not holding me, he took my gat and even stared intently at the inp-yeong hanging down softly.
“It’s a matched set. Me and Seowoo.”
“Yes, yes. We deliberately chose bamboo branches to have a similar feel.”
“It’s nice. Let’s do as you suggested.”
Na Jihan looked at me with a satisfied smile.
“Let’s take this. They say it’s a couple item.”
“Couple… what?”
I lost even the will to say anything and stared at him with my mouth open.
Our relationship, which hadn’t even reconciled, had been creaking along cheerfully just this morning. No, it didn’t even need to go until morning. We were the ones who hadn’t exchanged a single word even in the van.
You still have no intention of apologizing to Bae Dojin, and I’m stubbornly sulking at you for treating my heart like a tool.
Just because cameras are rolling and people are watching.
“Why, honey.”
Without letting me go, Na Jihan asked with a smiling face.
“Don’t you want to match with me?”
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
