#61. Size or Direction (1)
Arcus’s mini 1st album, ‘Journey’s activities went smoothly.
Was it thanks to the early summer heat that came earlier than usual? The title track, ‘Hitchhiking,’ gained a lot of word-of-mouth buzz. The refreshing and clear moombahton sound, cheerful choreography, and music video and stages styled with bright colors seemed to create good synergy.
When the main outfit adopted was shorts, it was a bit embarrassing though……
‘Isn’t this… aren’t these pants too short? They seem to come up more than a hand’s width from my knees.’
‘They have to come above the knees to be shorts. If you’re not even going to show your knees, why wear a sailor outfit?’
‘Jihan is wearing long pants.’
‘What demand would there be for Na Jihan-ssi’s thighs? In our group, hyung and I are the representatives showing them off.’
‘……’
‘If you’re embarrassed, you could change to long pants, but still, you’re an idol, right? The fans will like it, right? They’ll look forward to it, right?’
‘……I’ll wear them. I’ll wear them.’
As a result, the fans really did love it, so I resolved to never decline shorts coordination in the future.
I also had many amazing and happy experiences. On the day when all four songs – ‘Hitchhiking’ as the lead, followed by the B-sides ‘First Dream,’ ‘Dear my Dorocy,’ and ‘빙글빙글’ – all entered the charts and lined up, we were so amazed that we huddled together and stared at monitors all day long.
We were invited to university festivals and events, and even got offers for variety shows whose names I knew. Na Jihan even got an offer for an energy drink commercial.
As things went well, our motivation soared. It was natural to want to become people who could respond to the public’s love.
‘We have to do everything we can while we can.’
Every night I practiced for fan meetings with Hapil Jae. Since it was a precious opportunity to meet fans directly, we were training to make the most efficient use of the given time.
Under Hapil Jae’s barrage of questions, who was well-versed in all kinds of trends, aegyo, jokes, and memes, I diligently practiced and practiced again. Now I had become familiar enough to easily do the 5-piece aegyo set even if woken from sleep.
Thanks to Bae Dojin’s recommendation, I also appeared on visual radio during the promotion period, and in July, I even sang Days songs together with Bae Dojin.
The album titled ‘Journey’ truly lived up to its name by leading me to a world full of amazing things. Since everything was new and enjoyable to me, I felt like I was living this whole summer in a dreamlike state.
August arrived like that.
The 1st album activities had ended, but that didn’t mean the busyness disappeared. Talk came up about immediately preparing the 1st full album to continue this momentum.
The problem was that the album coming out in the first half of next year would be a ‘participatory album.’ Instead of just leaving everything to other people, all five members would try to contribute to the album.
It was a good opportunity, and there was no reason to refuse. It was a golden opportunity to improve our capabilities as artists, not just remain simple icons.
Ahn Haesol and Joo Lee Seon decided to actively participate in composing and arranging. Na Jihan decided to collaborate with a choreographer to create the title track’s choreography together, and Hapil Jae was in charge of rap and choreography assistance.
I, who had been wandering around looking for a path for a long time, also decided what I wanted to do. It was lyric writing.
When I was struggling not knowing what I was good at, the help surprisingly came from someone outside the group.
‘Seowoo hubae-nim’s words have warmth. I often feel it while doing radio. When you read stories and answer them, I liked the hearts contained in the words you spoke after careful consideration.’
‘……Thank you, sunbae-nim.’
‘So I was wondering. How about participating in lyric writing?’
To be honest, I’m not confident yet. Since it’s a field where I haven’t achieved any notable results yet, it seemed inevitable to feel nervous.
Still, I wanted to do something too. I didn’t want to freeload on the other members’ reputations. Even if I was clumsy and struggled, I believed my world would expand as much as I made efforts.
That’s why these days I read books more diligently. Not only poetry and novels that I usually like, but also self-help books, religion, history, and even things like photo books. I thought the more I knew, the more words I could use, and that way I could express my heart in more accurate and delicate ways.
Even amid the busy schedule, I diligently went to libraries to borrow and read books. As a result, there were days when I had to carry books everywhere because I was rushing to read them to meet return dates.
Today was exactly one of those days. On the way from evening training to the broadcasting station. Even while riding in Na Jihan’s car, I was reading a book……
“Look at this later.”
I must have dozed off leaning my head against the car window. A soft voice rang out, and Na Jihan’s hand came over to take the book that was precariously held in my hands.
“When’s the return deadline?”
I answered, “Tomorrow.” Even to me, it was terrible pronunciation, almost like mumbling, but Na Jihan somehow understood.
“I’ll return it and check it out again for you.”
“Mmm……”
“There’s still time before we arrive, so sleep more.”
His hand stroked my forehead, cheek, and nape in turn. He seemed to be checking my body temperature, and perhaps thinking it was cooler than expected, he turned down the air conditioning a bit.
Early summer raindrops pattered down on the slowly rolling car. It was such a drowsy silence that sleep naturally poured over me.
“Today’s the last time, right?”
After arriving at the broadcasting station and parking in the usual spot, Na Jihan asked. I, who had been dozing the whole time, barely came to my senses.
“Right.”
I had decided to step down as a regular guest on ‘Bae Dojin’s Moonlit Night.’
It was a good opportunity and enjoyable work, but I couldn’t handle my schedule if I continued doing it. Especially during the next full album activities, I had to perform not only the title track but also B-sides on stage.
‘There’s also talk of concerts coming up.’
There’s an expression called selective focus. It would be nice to do everything I wanted, but when that’s not possible, you ultimately have to choose the more important things and focus on them.
Arcus activities were most important to me. Individual activities could be done again later when opportunities came.
“That’s a shame……”
Bae Dojin was disappointed, but still thanked me for doing it longer than he had thought.
“If you miss it, you can do it again later. Next time, be the main DJ instead of a guest.”
“Is that something you can do just because you want to?”
“Mm.”
Na Jihan, who was tidying my disheveled hair, smiled.
“It doesn’t necessarily have to be a regular broadcast. Actually, these days it’s not just radio, but people communicate mainly through YouTube. Our group has a channel too.”
“That’s true.”
Our group was said to communicate with fans relatively often. When we turned on a live stream, two hours was the basic minimum, and last time Hapil Jae even broadcast all night.
So there was even talk about how it would be if all the members gathered regularly to broadcast. If we planned it well like original content and collected it, it would be convenient for fans to watch repeatedly.
“Whatever it is, it’s good as long as you do it with me.”
At those words, I chuckled softly and reached out to tap Na Jihan’s nose.
“Do you want to be jealous even in this situation?”
“Of course.”
He lightly grasped my wrist and pretended to bite my fingertips.
“Yoon Seowoo is mine, but you keep wandering outside. I don’t like it and I can’t stand it.”
“Hey. Why am I yours?”
“Aren’t you?”
Na Jihan looked at me quietly and answered.
“Then let’s reverse it. You’re mine right here, so why are you wandering outside?”
“……You just switched the subject and object positions.”
Not wanting to show how my heart was fluttering, I wriggled my hand and pinched and stretched his lips with my thumb and index finger.
“You don’t act like this when you’re with other people, but you always do this specifically during radio schedules?”
“With Bae Dojin……”
When I looked at him with a picky expression, going “Tsk,” Na Jihan spoke again in a slightly deflated voice.
“It’s with Bae Dojin sunbae.”
“Dojin sunbae is kind.”
“Kind my ass. That raccoon-like guy. He doesn’t say a word to the other members, but only to you he smiles sweetly and talks to you like he’ll bring you anything.”
Na Jihan snorted and finally bit my finger. He bared his teeth but didn’t put pressure on it, so it was just ticklish.
“From what I can see.”
Soon his sulky voice flowed out.
“That guy likes you.”
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
