Chapter 208
“I often thought of you. When drinking iced tea with preserved fruits, when passing by Blue Door, which is now a pizza place. Even seeing flying bees reminded me of you.”
“……”
“I wonder if it was because our relationship wasn’t properly concluded.”
A definitive conclusion. Those words reminded Hyeon-woo of the unbreakable bond with Tae-geon, which persisted even after the cruellest of endings, and the tie with McRae that had somehow quietly severed within him without any formal conclusion.
Hyeon-woo now understood more clearly than anyone that will or determination had no effect on relationships between people, that the heart couldn’t be controlled by such things.
Hyeon-woo spoke to McRae in a resolute voice.
“I’m glad I can express my gratitude now, and say a proper goodbye.”
McRae immediately detected the hidden meaning in Hyeon-woo’s gentle voice.
“…A goodbye?”
“Thank you, McRae. And…”
“……”
“You don’t need to come here anymore.”
McRae’s face instantly hardened.
“…Is it because I said our relationship wasn’t concluded?”
Hyeon-woo shook his head, but McRae could clearly see. Hyeon-woo’s determination to leave no room, no chance, no hope for this relationship.
“You’re the same as back then.”
McRae smiled bitterly.
“Still beautiful and still cruel.”
“……”
Was that why he was more attracted? Following human nature of desiring the unattainable, had he constantly yearned for Hyeon-woo because he was just out of reach?
“At this point, I wonder if it’s not about closure, but just my taste.”
McRae smiled playfully, but Hyeon-woo didn’t find it funny at all. He just felt sorry, over and over again. Hurting someone’s feelings was painful and difficult, but that’s why it needed to be made clearer. He had experienced firsthand that the pain from not doing so would be even more hurtful and agonizing later.
McRae teased the serious-faced Hyeon-woo.
“Why so serious?”
“…I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.”
“……”
“I benefited from image-making thanks to you. It’s not like I haven’t dated since then. What should I call this?”
After appearing lost in thought for a moment, McRae spoke again.
“The most painful of the five fingers? Meaning you’re not my only finger, so to speak.”
Nevertheless, as Hyeon-woo hung his head, McRae smiled bitterly and then noticed a figure approaching them over Hyeon-woo’s shoulder. His eyes widened in surprise.
Recognizing him instantly, McRae’s eyes trembled slightly before regaining composure, and the corner of his mouth twisted slightly. With a mischievous smile spreading across his face, McRae asked Hyeon-woo.
“How’s Jerry? Is he doing well? He must be five now?”
…Jerry…?
Hyeon-woo hesitated for a moment at the unfamiliar name, then realizing it meant Jerome, he replied, “Yes.” Why was he calling Jerome ‘Jerry’ when he had personally given Jerome his name? As Hyeon-woo pondered this, he suddenly startled.
McRae knew Jerome’s truth that should never be revealed to the world. McRae smiled slightly at the cautious Hyeon-woo and whispered in a low voice.
“I just guessed, but it seems I was right. I’m relieved he’s with you now.”
Then he made a gesture of zipping his lips, indicating he would keep the secret. Only then did the tension leave Hyeon-woo’s face.
“I’d like to see him. Do you have a photo?”
Hyeon-woo took out his phone from his pocket and opened the photo gallery. As McRae carefully looked at each photo Hyeon-woo showed him, he finally chuckled at the sight of Jerome wearing reindeer antlers.
“Haha, he’s so cute. He looks just like when he was a baby.”
“Right? His face is still babyish, but he’s grown a lot taller.”
As Hyeon-woo laughed together with McRae, their heads close, he suddenly seemed to remember something and looked up.
“Oh, I should go now. I have someone waiting for me.”
McRae smiled, his eyes crinkling.
“…Alright, go on. It was nice to see you.”
McRae, who had been staring at Hyeon-woo with an unreadable expression, stopped Hyeon-woo as he was straightening his suit that had been ruffled by the wind.
“Hyeon-woo.”
“Yes?”
“Be happy.”
“…Yes.”
Right.
A bitter smile crossed McRae’s lips. Along with his wish for Hyeon-woo’s happiness, a slight pettiness welled up.
McRae suddenly spread his arms towards Hyeon-woo.
“Can I give you that comfort I couldn’t give back then? Let’s hug, just once.”
“……”
As Hyeon-woo hesitated, seemingly uncomfortable and not readily embracing him, McRae whispered softly, mouthing the words.
‘A final farewell hug.’
…Final.
It was the last moment with McRae, who had given him unconditional kindness and excessive affection. It felt mean to reject even this after coldly cutting off his feelings.
Just as Hyeon-woo was about to step towards McRae to grant what might be his last wish, someone strongly grabbed Hyeon-woo’s arm from behind, stopping him.
Surprised, Hyeon-woo inhaled sharply and turned around to see Tae-geon.
How long had he been there? His tightly set lips and prominently clenched jaws seemed to be barely containing intense emotions.
McRae curled up the corners of his mouth towards such a Tae-geon.
“…We’re clearly meeting for the first time, but it doesn’t feel like it.”
“……”
“You seem to feel the same.”
McRae leisurely shifted his gaze from Tae-geon, who was glaring at him as if he wanted to kill him, to stare at Hyeon-woo. Then he showed an enigmatic smile.
…You say you’ll be happy? Can you really be happy with this person whose face seems to embrace all the misfortunes of the world?
McRae, who had been gazing intently at Hyeon-woo, smiled mischievously as if finding something amusing.
“Jerry still doesn’t know anything, right?”
“Yes.”
McRae’s smile deepened as he glanced at Tae-geon’s face. It seemed Jerome wasn’t the only one who didn’t know anything. Looking at Hyeon-woo as if amused, McRae narrowed his eyes with a face hiding some scheme.
“If you ever need testimony about the truth later, come find me. It’s a truth that only you and I know in this world.”
“…Thank you for your concern.”
Hyeon-woo readily took the bait. If he had seen the face of the person standing behind him, words of gratitude would never have come out of his mouth.
McRae shook his head as he alternately looked at the two severely misaligned people with interested eyes.
He was curious about what this fuse he had lit today would ignite, but he probably wouldn’t know the story after this. His connection with Hyeon-woo would end today. However, looking at the pale face of the man, it seemed clear that his appearance today would create a major turning point between the two.
Whether in a good direction or a bad one.
So how his pettiness would play out was now up to them.
“Take care.”
“You too.”
“Well, I’ll be going.”
McRae turned away from them with a cheerful gait and headed straight to where his car was parked. Soon, a large SUV appeared, passed by Tae-geon and Hyeon-woo, and sped down the empty beach road, completely disappearing from view.
As Hyeon-woo watched this, he suddenly frowned at the pain he felt in his arm. The grip on his wrist caught by Tae-geon grew stronger, causing unbearable pain.
“Ah, it hurts!”
Only when Hyeon-woo let out a sharp scream did the strength leave Tae-geon’s hand, but he still didn’t let go. Hyeon-woo failed to notice Tae-geon’s somewhat anxious face. His mind was completely filled with a question he had been dying to ask him.
“…The no-fault disposition for my parents’ accident. Was that your doing?”
Tae-geon’s face, which had briefly shown surprise as if wondering how Hyeon-woo knew, soon twisted into a sardonic expression as if understanding.
“Yeah, that’s right. I did it.”
Hyeon-woo’s eyes filled with tears as he smiled faintly at Tae-geon, who responded casually.
Yes, I knew it was you.
Tae-geon would never know, even if he died and came back to life, what he had accomplished and what it meant to Hyeon-woo.
His feelings for Tae-geon and his guilt towards his parents had been engaged in a fierce battle like a seesaw game. And at this moment, the seesaw that had finally tipped to one side completely stopped moving. His overloaded mind finally quieted down.
Unless his parents came back to life, Tae-geon’s sin could never be erased. However, apart from that, the fact that Tae-geon had personally cleared the stigma of his unjustly deceased parents meant more to Hyeon-woo than anything else.
What he had ultimately failed to do, the knot that had been tightly wound in one corner of his heart, had been untied by none other than Tae-geon himself.
Had his desperate wish for Tae-geon’s forgiveness reached the heavens? It felt like a response saying it was okay to like him a little, and his heart swelled.
“…Thank you.”
“……”
“Thank you so much.”
Tae-geon looked with indifferent eyes at Hyeon-woo, who was expressing his sincere gratitude with tears welling up in his eyes.
As Hyeon-woo was half-dragged by Tae-geon towards the parked car, he finally looked at Tae-geon with puzzled eyes. He thought the anxious footsteps seemed somewhat unlike him.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
