Chapter 180
“The other one you said died. How did he die?”
Startled by the question about Jerome’s biological father, Kevin suddenly came to Hyeon-woo’s mind.
“He died from a drug overdose. He was an addict.”
“……”
Tae-geon’s eyes, which had widened in surprise, soon narrowed. He stared at Hyeon-woo with a dubious look.
Dead? Because of drugs? He associated with such a junkie? Han Hyeon-woo…?
Questions cascaded through Tae-geon’s mind. Even knowing Hyeon-woo would never associate with such people, Tae-geon couldn’t easily confirm his own thoughts.
Not knowing what kind of life Hyeon-woo had lived in America, and having been severely blindsided in the distant past when he arrogantly thought he knew everything about Hyeon-woo, Tae-geon was unsure.
Even now, after many years, Tae-geon often found it difficult to comprehend Hyeon-woo’s past encounters with alphas of unknown origins. However, the truth was irrelevant to comprehension, and it couldn’t be changed by denial.
‘Has anyone else sucked you like this before?’
The memory of Hyeon-woo freezing in shock at those words uttered unknowingly during their encounter suddenly flashed through Tae-geon’s mind. He rubbed his furrowed brow with one hand, feeling dizzy.
Whether the person Hyeon-woo recalled in response to his question was Jerome’s biological father or not, Tae-geon had no intention of pressing further. No, in truth, he wanted to push frantically and interrogate. He wanted to thoroughly investigate how many hands, how many lips had touched every sensitive part of Hyeon-woo, sucking and caressing.
An intense possessiveness boiled up from his core. He knew that Hyeon-woo’s feelings towards him were no longer the same as before. The Hyeon-woo who used to cast affectionate glances behind his back, and the Hyeon-woo who used to hate him fiercely, were both gone. Even knowing that Hyeon-woo now only pitied him, Tae-geon wanted to cling to that pity to keep Hyeon-woo by his side.
He didn’t feel miserable at all. The moment Hyeon-woo returned to the mansion of his own accord, Tae-geon sensed it. That he would never let Hyeon-woo go again. That he would use every means and method to keep Hyeon-woo by his side.
He had no face or pride left before Hyeon-woo. Just when he thought he wouldn’t wish for anything more if Hyeon-woo would just stay by his side, now he felt like he was going crazy with jealousy and possessiveness that kept surging.
He wanted to repaint with his own touch every part of Hyeon-woo that an alpha’s hands, lips, or breath might have touched. He wanted to completely overturn all the sensations Hyeon-woo might have felt beneath them – the pleasure, the ecstasy – and make them his own.
Tae-geon suppressed these destructive impulses with all his might every time they rampaged. He was no longer twenty years old. Hadn’t he painfully experienced how his past actions, taking Hyeon-woo recklessly just following his instincts and desires, had led to ruin?
He couldn’t repeat the mistakes of that time.
‘He died.’
A voice quite different from when mentioning his parents’ death. A dry voice devoid of even a hint of emotion. Tae-geon initially felt a strange sense of dissonance at this stark contrast to how Hyeon-woo cherished Jerome, but soon dismissed his doubts.
Even in moments when he was confined and violated by Tae-geon, Hyeon-woo had cherished the baby in his womb. That’s why Tae-geon hadn’t even imagined it could have been his child.
Tae-geon gave up trying to gauge Hyeon-woo’s feelings towards that person. He realized that Jerome’s existence couldn’t be evidence of a bond between that person and Hyeon-woo, and moreover, Hyeon-woo had no reason to deceive him. They were no longer anything to each other.
He himself had no right to interrogate Hyeon-woo about his past. While knowing this rationally, Tae-geon found it difficult to suppress his rising jealousy.
If that person hadn’t died and was still by Hyeon-woo’s side, would they be married by now? Would they have made vows before everyone to be together for life, and be living the happiest life under one roof with Jerome, born amidst everyone’s blessings, in a harmonious family?
The moment such thoughts crossed his mind, a terrible sense of loss overwhelmed Tae-geon.
…He said he was a junkie. An alpha pathetic enough to die from an overdose couldn’t have given Hyeon-woo such happiness.
Feeling utterly worthless for rationalizing like this, Tae-geon was consumed by intense self-loathing when suddenly a sharp memory flashed through his mind.
The scene of the bathtub turning completely red with blood flowing endlessly from between Hyeon-woo’s legs.
‘Our baby… what should I do?’
Tae-geon squeezed his eyes shut.
After losing his sight, in a world of nothing but darkness, while memories faded one by one like black and white films, for some reason only that scene remained vivid and red.
Seemingly flustered by this nightmare that often tormented him flashing through his mind like lightning at this moment, Tae-geon ran his hand through his hair and let out a low, derisive laugh.
So what? Was he feeling guilty towards his dead child now? No, it might be regret rather than guilt. Whatever it was, it was futile. It was all over now.
Averting his gaze from Hyeon-woo, Tae-geon asked,
“Is this house yours?”
Hyeon-woo was inwardly relieved at this unexpected question. He had been tense, wondering what to do if Tae-geon probed further, but glad for the change of subject, he immediately replied.
“No, it’s a jeonse lease.”
“Get rid of this place and move into the mansion. With the child too.”
“…What?”
As Hyeon-woo questioned with a blank face at these sudden words, Tae-geon added,
“I’m saying come to the mansion with Jerome. Stop living in squalor in this dump.”
“…Why do you have to say it so offensively?”
Tae-geon’s proposal poured out like machine gun fire into Hyeon-woo’s ears, who was clearly displeased.
“I’ll guarantee you can live in a better environment than here. I’ll make sure he can attend daycare just like now, and if you want, we can even hire a visiting teacher. Experts will help Jerome develop in a balanced way, and if there’s anything else he wants to learn, I’ll support whatever it is-”
“Wait, wait a minute…!”
Hyeon-woo’s eyes, interrupting Tae-geon’s words, filled with confusion.
“…What are you talking about?”
“……”
“Why, why are you concerned about Jerome…?”
It would be a lie to say he wasn’t tempted.
While the pay, workload, and work environment all satisfied Hyeon-woo, if there was one stumbling block, it was that he couldn’t meet Jerome on weekdays. So Tae-geon’s offer to resolve this was undeniably attractive.
Hyeon-woo had dropped out of both university and studying abroad, leaving his final education level at high school graduate. He only knew how to sit and study, without any decent skills.
He didn’t want to pass on a life of physical toil at the bottom of the labor market to Jerome. So he worked desperately to earn money. He wanted to lay the groundwork to fully support Jerome’s dreams, whatever they might be.
The timer set for Jerome’s twentieth birthday, when he would become an independent adult, was ticking away, choking Hyeon-woo. Not enough, still not enough. He kept pushing himself, constantly whipping himself. In the midst of this, Tae-geon’s offer naturally tempted Hyeon-woo.
But he couldn’t readily accept it. It was strange. Why? Why would Tae-geon go to such lengths for Jerome?
As if sensing the doubt arising in Hyeon-woo, Tae-geon spoke before being asked.
“What if an employee is distracted, can’t do their job properly, and can’t keep promises? Can you guarantee this won’t happen two or three more times? Are you confident you won’t treat promises to me like old shoes again?”
“……”
Hyeon-woo kept his mouth shut. There was no room for excuses. It was clear that even if time were turned back, he would choose Jerome again. Jerome was his everything.
Tae-geon swallowed his bitterness at the sight of Hyeon-woo closing his mouth and averting his gaze. Although he knew well that Hyeon-woo’s priority was no longer himself, he couldn’t help feeling unpleasant every time he faced it like this.
“…I heard. Thanks to your blood transfusion, I got through the crisis.”
“Ah.”
Hyeon-woo’s eyes widened as if remembering something he had forgotten.
Having stirred up guilt with the whip, now it was time to entice with the carrot. In a way to gently drive Hyeon-woo into the net he wanted, without making him flee from the pressure.
“Don’t think too hard about it. I just can’t stand being indebted to others, just like you.”
“……”
It was typical of Choi Tae-geon. Hyeon-woo’s eyes, now less doubtful, settled coolly.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
