Change (1)
“Wouldn’t it be better if the Leader also participated in the planning?”
Lee Jak suggested. Jiwon hesitated. Somehow, he felt that if he got involved in the planning, things would reach a point of no return. But he also didn’t want to be caught off guard again, like during the filming of the second promotional video. His feelings were complicated.
Noticing Jiwon’s hesitation, Lee Jak spoke cautiously.
“Of course, it’s just a suggestion. But Kim Seonghee seemed to give you that book as a sign that he won’t act without mutual agreement from now on.”
“…”
“Wouldn’t it be better if we both agreed on the play? In many ways.”
It made sense, but Jiwon still felt hesitant. Was he afraid that he’d end up being forced into something he didn’t want, even if he didn’t refuse during the planning stage? Jiwon couldn’t find the right words to express his feelings. Seeing Jiwon hesitate, Yoon Jaemin chimed in.
“For the Leader to bring happiness to more people, the Leader must be happy first.”
“My happiness…”
The happiest thing would be to quit this Leader role and return to normal life. But the debt he still owed was too much. As Lee Jak had said, he’d never be able to pay it off in his lifetime if he did anything else. He’d spend his life barely paying the interest, working himself to the bone, and die in misery.
Jiwon had no way out of this situation. The only faint hope he had was what Lee Jak suggested—blackmailing Kim Seonghee. But he didn’t even know if that would work. It wasn’t something that could be resolved overnight.
In the end, Jiwon only had two choices: either continue to blindly accept whatever came his way, or try to steer things in a slightly better direction. Obviously, the latter was less painful and less agonizing. He knew the answer, but he still hesitated.
“Can I really be happy?”
Jiwon asked without realizing it. He didn’t expect an answer, but he got a surprisingly serious reply.
“I don’t think happiness is something grand. Even small improvements can be happiness, and even in the same situation, you can choose to be happy depending on how you think about it. Either way, I hope the Leader can be a little happier.”
“I agree. The Leader is much greater than you think. I hope you realize how much happiness your actions bring to others. Of course, for that, the Leader must be happy first.”
To be even a little happier in this limited situation, he had to make some effort himself. He needed to take action or change his mindset. Jiwon knew that. It was just hard to accept.
“Then… I’ll do it. I’ll participate in the planning.”
At Jiwon’s resolve, Lee Jak’s face brightened.
“The book alone might not be enough. I’ll find and send you other helpful materials.”
“More materials…?”
“Books are good for the basics, but nothing beats video for application.”
Yoon Jaemin nodded in agreement at Lee Jak’s words. Jiwon also thought it made sense and nodded. Lee Jak told Yoon Jaemin to bring a new tablet with helpful videos. Yoon Jaemin left the Leader’s room to fetch the tablet. Once Yoon Jaemin was gone, Lee Jak spoke.
“You seem to have gotten comfortable with Yoon Jaemin.”
“Me? With Yoon Jaemin?”
“You’ve only known each other for a short time, but it shows.”
“Did it… show?”
“Yes. Yoon Jaemin is naturally talkative and sociable, but you’re not that kind of person, are you?”
Was I that kind of person? Jiwon was a little confused.
“…The Leader must tell me everything.”
“What?”
“I hate variables. You said you’d help me pay off my debt and quit this Leader position as soon as possible, and I agreed to cooperate, right?”
“That’s right.”
“Then shouldn’t we have no secrets from each other? If we keep secrets, things might go wrong.”
Jiwon thought Lee Jak’s words made sense.
“Let me ask again. When I wasn’t around, nothing happened with Yoon Jaemin, right?”
“…”
But he didn’t want to tell him what had happened in his absence. There were too many reasons. The most troubling part was something else.
I don’t want him to think I spread my legs for any man.
Yoon Jaemin had stimulated his sympathy and persuaded him with tears to suck his cock. But people don’t care about the process; they only care about the result. The result was simple: Jiwon had spread his legs for a man he’d known for less than 30 minutes and let him suck his cock. No matter the process, the result remained the same.
In the end, Jiwon decided to keep his mouth shut. After all, it had been consensual with Yoon Jaemin.
“Nothing happened. He just asked if I was in pain and I answered.”
“I see. Understood.”
Lee Jak nodded quickly at Jiwon’s words. He seemed to only care about what had happened. Jiwon was relieved at Lee Jak’s quick acceptance.
“First, I have a performance to suggest to the Leader.”
“A performance…?”
“Yes. If the main dish is the Leader and Kim Seonghee’s sex, then we need an appetizer to set the mood.”
“Last time, there wasn’t one.”
“Last time, Kim Seonghee came out first and set the mood himself. He even gave out gifts.”
“Ah…”
So that’s what he meant. Jiwon nodded. If Lee Jak said it was necessary, then it probably was.
“I still think a format where ordinary followers can participate is best.”
“‘Ordinary followers’?”
Jiwon was a little scared. Noticing his obvious expression change, Lee Jak laughed openly.
“I’m just suggesting that format. For example, give all the followers a chance and select a few to come up on stage.”
“That…”
“But we’ll pre-select the participants based on their donation order to prepare them. There might be unexpected situations, so we need to be safe.”
“It sounds… like a prize draw.”
“Of course. People who donate more should get a little more taste, or else why would they donate?”
Right. This was a cult, after all. Jiwon realized he sometimes forgot that obvious fact.
“I’ll think about this part. I still have some resistance to multiple people.”
“You’ll be fine. It’s just a performance. You’ll only watch, and the sex will only be with Kim Seonghee.”
That was actually the most repulsive part. Jiwon forced a smile. Knock, knock. Someone knocked on the door.
“Leader. May I come in?”
Yoon Jaemin returned with the tablet. When Jiwon told him to enter, Yoon Jaemin excitedly turned on the tablet and showed him the videos he had brought.
“I’ve selected only my favorites.”
“…”
“This one is my top recommendation.”
It seemed Yoon Jaemin had picked them himself. Confidently, he played a video: a man in a ‘groom’ outfit having sex with a man in a ‘devil’ outfit. The next video showed a man in an ‘angel’ outfit having sex with someone in a ‘fallen angel’ concept. Jiwon was speechless. He didn’t need to watch more to know Yoon Jaemin’s taste.
“I really like these concept outfits. What do you think? The Leader’s fair skin and good proportions would make bold exposure look great…”
“Yoon Jaemin. This isn’t an event to satisfy personal desires.”
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
