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The Sub-Top of This Novel Is Strange 60

I put on the training pants and long-sleeved T-shirt I’d practically snatched from Min Siheon.

The moment I took a single step, the pants started slipping down. When I hitched them up at the waist, the overly long sleeves caught my eye.

Just what kind of frame did Min Siheon have? He looked fairly slim with clothes on, but in reality he was a pretty massive guy.

I wasn’t exactly small myself, so what the hell was this look? Trying to ignore my crumpled pride, I moved forward. A delicious smell wafted from the living room, stimulating my nose.

Grrr— clutching my empty stomach, I peeked toward the living room, only to find a scene I’d seen before repeating itself.

While I was washing up, Min Siheon had apparently finished preparing a meal in no time. He set a plate on the table and turned toward me.

“Mm, all clean?”

“Huh? Yeah, yeah. I… didn’t help at all. Sorry.”

“No, it’s fine. Come sit down quickly. You’re hungry, right?”

Feeling awkward, I kept stealing glances at him. I still couldn’t quite believe I’d spent the night with that guy.

It wasn’t that I disliked it—just… embarrassing. Apparently, I wasn’t thick-skinned enough for this.

As I hesitated forward, Min Siheon pulled out a chair for me as if telling me to sit. I barely picked up my chopsticks and started poking at the food when a heated gaze poured over me from the side.

“Hey, you’re gonna give me indigestion.”

“Haha, sorry. I’m just happy.”

“Kek—kek. What are you saying first thing in the morning?!”

Even as I coughed from choking, Min Siheon just laughed and handed me a glass of water. Was he always looking at me like that?

Maybe it was because our feelings finally aligned, but I started noticing things I’d never seen before.

The biggest example was this… Apparently, I was someone who was used to being cared for. Min Siheon was paying attention to everything about me, from A to Z.

When I approached the table, he pulled out my chair and guided me to sit. While I ate, he poured warm water at the perfect temperature and watched my chopsticks the entire time.

“You like this, right?”

“Yeah.”

Since when had he been watching me so closely? The side dishes I found especially tasty were pushed toward me, nudging aside the others.

The moment he noticed my soup bowl filled mostly with broth and only ingredients left behind, he immediately handed me another serving he’d prepared in advance.

Meanwhile, he hadn’t even properly taken a bite himself. Leaving his rice bowl practically untouched, Min Siheon just kept looking at me.

It felt nice… but also embarrassing. With my chopsticks still between my lips, I found myself checking his expression.

Maybe he noticed, because Min Siheon rested his chin on his hand and gave me a curious look.

“Why aren’t you eating?”

“Did that bother you that much?”

The moment he heard my quiet remark, the corner of his lips lifted in relief.

Yeah, that was the cause. That sweet, teasing smile that messed with people’s emotions.

If he didn’t smile like that, maybe I wouldn’t have fallen for him.

…Honestly, though, no matter what, I probably would’ve loved him eventually. If we hadn’t lived as complete strangers, becoming strangers now felt impossible.

But I couldn’t exactly say that in front of him.

They say relationships where one person loves more don’t last long. Trying to brush off the negative thought, I urged Min Siheon to eat.

“Wouldn’t it bother you if it were you? Hurry and eat. Looking at your face, you seem like you’ve lost weight.”

“Yeah. Someone wouldn’t answer my calls, you know. How was I supposed to eat?”

Ugh, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. I’d only complained because his face looked sharper and worried me, but one sentence from him stabbed straight into my chest.

His eyes above that slightly upturned smile were sharp—though it didn’t last long.

Seeing my hesitant reaction, Min Siheon quickly fluttered his lashes and softened his gaze.

The way his eyes curved gently made what I’d just seen feel like a lie.

Thinking I should apologize first, I swallowed the food in my mouth. It felt like chewing and swallowing sand.

“I’m sorry.”

“I wasn’t trying to hear that. Were you feeling guilty?”

At some point, Min Siheon had lifted his arm. Reaching toward me, he gently cupped my cheek, still holding his chopsticks.

“Of course I’d notice. You looked like you were wasting away.”

His hands were colder than most people’s, and the touch cooled the heat in my face.

In the sweltering season, it felt just right.

When I lowered my eyes and fell silent from guilt, Min Siheon stood up and came closer.

He pulled out the chair beside me and sat down, taking my hand where it rested after I set my chopsticks down.

His other hand cradled my left cheek, holding my face.

With a gentle push, he turned me to face him. Unable to bear even a moment without eye contact, he leaned close until our gazes locked.

Sunlight streaming through the balcony and large window made his eyes look brown. My reflection shimmered faintly inside them, swaying with his gaze.

“From what I can see, you’re the same as me, Jungwoo. You were like that too, right?”

“…Yeah.”

I nodded quietly at Min Siheon’s question. It felt wrong to avoid his gaze when he was this close.

Swallowing dryly with my hoarse, worn-out voice, I ignored the faint sting in my throat and spoke.

The words carried both an apology for worrying him and guilt toward him.

“If I’d been just a little more honest, you wouldn’t have suffered this much. You’re the only one who went through a hard time because of me.”

My blunt way of speaking was probably just because I’d lived twenty-nine years like this—that was my excuse. But my feelings for him were sincere.

Min Siheon seemed to understand all of it. He let out a small laugh, that familiar smile appearing as he lifted the corners of his lips and pressed his forehead against mine.

We were so close it was embarrassing to even call it “close.”

How did things suddenly turn into this kind of atmosphere? I darted my eyes around, trying to grasp the situation.

Still stroking my cheek, Min Siheon whispered softly.

“It’s okay, because you came to me now. Jungwoo, you just need to promise me one thing.”

“What?”

“That you won’t leave. That you’ll stay by my side forever.”

The meaning behind his words was singular and firm. After such a long time, since I finally came to him, he wanted me never to leave.

Was he asking me to promise eternity right now? At the start of a relationship, it could sound sweet.

But for some reason, I couldn’t explain why, his words felt unbearably heavy.

I felt like someone whose hands and feet were tightly bound—I couldn’t move. Despite his gentle voice and kind expression, a strangely cold atmosphere lingered.

Then I realized the reason I felt this way… his eyes. They were affectionate, yet endlessly cold. A persistent gaze that waited for my answer while never looking away.

Well, yeah. He’d always had a stubborn streak. After everything I’d seen these past few days, it was clear he had a strong personality.

Even Cha Seung-ah’s old explanations, which I never understood before, suddenly made sense.

Maybe it was because I’d fallen in love with him. Now it felt like I could accept even these parts of him. Did he really like me that much? It even made my chest feel a little ticklish.

Crazy bastard. Maybe I was the one who’d truly lost it. Was I always this devoted? Somehow it didn’t even feel important anymore.

As the silence stretched, Min Siheon’s expression hardened dangerously. This guy, seriously impatient. I let out a small laugh and smiled back.

I lifted my hand and caressed his cheek in return. Honestly, I didn’t want someone I loved to tremble with anxiety.

Eternal love… to some people it might sound fictional, to others like a dream. But I had only just finally come together with him.

Whether it made sense or not—fuck it. If I said I’d do it, then I’d do it.

The warmth of my hand turned his cheek lukewarm. As I traced along his skin, the sharp tension in his eyes softened.

I smoothed the crease between his brows and stuck out my lips in mock annoyance.

“We’re having some pretty heavy conversations first thing in the morning.”

“……”

“Hey, you didn’t forget, right? I was the one who confessed. Well… you probably suffered more than me, though.”

“Jungwoo.”

I grumbled nonstop from the morning, and he probably had every reason to find me annoying. But Min Siheon looked like none of it mattered. If anything, he seemed relieved hearing my rough words as he called my name.

“…I was just born like this, so I’m not good at saying pretty things. My mouth’s rough, I smoke like a chimney, and yeah, guys can be like that, but I’ve got some pretty coarse edges in weird ways.”

“……”

“My high school friends call me hopeless at dating, and I’m pretty big too. You said I’m not heavy, but… honestly, I can’t even joke about that. Anyone would see a twenty-three-year-old discharged-from-the-military guy who grows stubble every morning.”

“Uh-huh, and?”

“…And? Now that you’re giving me the stage, it’s kinda hard. Ah… I’m actually really cowardly. That’s why I couldn’t face my own feelings properly. But I’m greedy too, so I couldn’t give up on you. I bragged about staying friends, but in reality I was a liar who couldn’t even try. You know that, right? Still….”

It turned into a long stretch of self-reflection. …Shit, did I say too much? Maybe I should’ve held back. I started worrying that Min Siheon might lose affection for me mid-speech.

Just as I held my breath, thinking I’d make excuses later—

“Even so, if you’re okay with someone like me… no, I’ll be the one asking you. Min Siheon.”

“Yeah, Jungwoo.”

With my hand still resting on his cheek, I lifted my thumb and traced along the line of his eyes.

“Stay by my side.”

This time, I’ll be the brave one. So… let’s make that damn promise together.

“Yeah, I will. I promise.”

Min Siheon’s arms wrapped around me. I held him back just as tightly. Thump—thump— the sound of our hearts echoed against each other’s chests. It felt like I was floating into the air.

Ah, it was a morning so sweet it felt like I could die. Food didn’t even matter—right now, there was nothing more important to me than him.

Levia
Author: Levia

The Sub-Top of This Novel Is Strange

The Sub-Top of This Novel Is Strange

이 소설의 서브공은 이상하다
Status: Completed Author: Released: Free chapters released every Tuesday
An ordinary office worker, Cha Jungwoo, finds himself transmigrated into the BL novel his younger sister had been reading. Fortunately, aside from his age, academic background, and college classmates, nothing much had changed. Whether the main couple fought and made up was none of his business—that was the line he drew. But after repeated chance encounters with the sub-male lead, he found his eyes lingering on the guy more and more. “…Jungwoo-ya, I’m hurting.” “Hey, what are you doing leaning on me all of a sudden? I get it, so move already.” “…I really hurt. I’m upset, so don’t push me away.” The reason he bought the guy—who was often unwell—a summer cardigan. The reason he peeled off the tattered bandage from over his injured knuckles and replaced it with a fresh one. Amid questions piling up layer upon layer, he kept denying it, telling himself it couldn’t be true, but in the end— “I… I like Min Siheon—the sub-male lead in this novel.” To think he regarded him as more than a friend, even felt affection for him. It was an unrequited love with no possibility. If he saw Min Siheon now, it would only make his heart ache more, so he decided to keep his distance for a while and endure…. [Jungwoo-ya, why aren’t you responding?] [Nothing’s wrong, right?] [Could you at least pick up the phone?] : : [Cha Jungwoo. Contact me before I come find you myself.]

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smokeyhearts
7 hours ago

I’m already seeing a lot of Jungwoo being embarrassed about how close Siheon will act now in future chapters lol I wanna see Siheon’s POV too! ;A;

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