24: The Stars of Rhodheoga (1)

Content and trigger warning: Issue of consent between the leads.

Before Mammon returned, I had already sent word to him that I was leaving first.

When I got back to the Hall of Baisiel, Hanniah’s eyes crinkled with joy the moment he saw me. “Father actually walked out—I’m so happy.” I knew full well the kind of damage Mammon’s scythe could do. It surprised even me that I was able to recover so quickly.

Hanniah stood by the window, gazing at the stars. The blue-green starlight spilled over him, bathing his whole body in a faint glow. He had tied his long hair loosely behind, with a few red strands falling straight and fine near his ears, framing a beautiful side profile and skin like lily petals. Even the downy feathers on his wings trembled gently in the night light.

I lifted my head slightly. “Missing home?”

“I miss the people more but doesn’t want to go back so quickly anymore. This place is really fun.”

“Missing your Heavenly Father?”

“Mhm. And God, Lord Gabriel, Lord Raphael, Lord Sandalphon, Lord Randekiel, Moroni, Almedie… so many. Oh—and also that silver-haired big brother.”

“Silver-haired big brother?”

“I don’t actually know if he’s a big brother—maybe he’s more like an uncle. I only saw him once, on the Sixth Heaven, when I was helping someone grow wings.”

“There shouldn’t be any silver-haired angel in Heaven… How come I’ve never seen him?”

“The first time I saw him, he was squatting next to the altar. His hair was shinier than the water in the basin… but I was too far away to see his face clearly. I only remember his lips and cheeks had no color so he didn’t seem easy to approach.”

“You be careful not to get tricked by strangers.”

“I won’t.” Hanniah ran over to me. “Father, I want to come to the Demon Realm often in the future. I also want to visit the ocean, the human world… everywhere I can go. Then I’ll bring all the best things I learn back with me. You, me, and Heavenly Father—we three will restore Heaven together and give those rotten bastards a good lesson.”

“Silly boy. You’re still holding a grudge against Mammon.”

“He went too far.”

“Mammon’s actually quite mature in some ways. And besides, he’s older than you.”

“Father, you’re taking his side again.”

I ruffled his tied-up red hair and smiled. “When did you become such a little jar of jealousy? Listen—when you’re out making your way in the world, your Heavenly Father and I will stay in Sancta Faylia and enjoy retirement. Whenever you find something new, just bring it back and show it to us two old men, alright?”

“Oh God! Please bless my father so he never says that kind of thing again!”

I pulled the blanket around him and wrapped him up tight, making him shriek and squirm.

After a while, he suddenly turned over, placing both hands on my shoulders. “You’re not going to abandon me and Heavenly Father, are you?”

“Everything I’m doing now… isn’t it all for you and your Heavenly Father.”

Hanniah smiled with contentment and nestled against me, slowly drifting off to sleep.

He was still at that young, inexperienced age. Still had some odd little compulsions, like making me promise him things. In truth, he was just insecure—just like I was, once. I used to force that man to promise me all kinds of things, too.

He once said that no matter what happened, even if I tried to kill him, he wouldn’t let go.

He said he would help me forget all the unhappiness, and give me all the joy he could. That no one could separate us. No one.

He also said, that he would love me, always.

I touched my forehead, making sure I wasn’t feverish. But back then, I must have been seriously fever-struck to believe lines that sounded like they came from an eight o’clock soap opera, and be moved to tears, ready to throw myself in a river to prove to him my eternal love.

I laid Hanniah flat on the bed and pulled the blanket over him.

Then, still wearing my robe, I stepped out onto the balcony. It was cold outside.

Looking across from the window, I saw the lights in Kade Palace were still on. Lucifer was probably getting cozy with Lilith right now. I really had lived in the past for too long. These days, their relationship was the very picture of sweetness and romance—any couple would envy them. Not like back then, when he and I were so inexperienced we’d fight over whether to call each other husband or wife. I used to secretly write his name in my palm, make coffee in the cup he drank from, cling to the clothes he wore, sit where he had just sat on the couch… It was all like some kind of childish playhouse.

Suddenly, the lights across went out. The curtain was drawn aside, and someone stepped out onto the broad balcony.

Lucifer placed a glass of milk on the windowsill, then abruptly looked up, and saw me.

Things had been tense between us ever since what happened at Mammon’s. I’d thought about how to face him again the whole afternoon and had also practiced the whole afternoon. So now, seeing him, I smiled naturally. “Your Majesty, still awake this late?”

Lucifer nodded, as if surprised.

“Has Her Majesty Lilith gone to bed?”

“She just fell asleep.”

He always bathed before and after intimacy. Seeing his damp hair and the towel around his neck, I was tempted to tease him, but the words caught in my throat and didn’t come out.

It was a while before Lucifer responded. “Aren’t you going to sleep?”

“Your Majesty should sleep first.”

“I’m not tired.” Lucifer leaned on the balcony, his eyes filled with starlight. “…You’ll probably be busy once you go back to Heaven, won’t you?”

“It’s manageable.” I flapped my wings, several golden feathers came loose and drifted into the darkness. “Your Majesty’s drinking milk all by yourself and didn’t think to prepare a cup for me?”

Lucifer suddenly paused mid-sip. “Mind if I come over?”

I stepped aside slightly. “Of course not.”

He spread his wings and glided over, stopping in front of me. The night wind lifted his hair; even with his usual indifferent expression, his dark red eyes held a commanding aura. Under a streak of silver moonlight, his black wings were darker than the night itself, and their sleek feathers shimmered with a cold gloss.

It was my first time seeing Lucifer fully unfold all six of his black wings. It reminded me of a moment on the Sixth Heaven when I had seen him spread them before.

Back then, I had thought that even Sancta Faylia couldn’t contain his wings.

And now, those six great wings moved slowly in the air, as if even the night sky of Hell was being swallowed by them…

Under the moonlight, he gazed at me, his eyes deep red gemstones that glimmered faintly even in shadow. In the instant I met his gaze, I had never so profoundly felt that this Lucifer before me was no longer a simple, darkened version of Ruthfel, but the ruler of all Hell, the Demon Sovereign Lucifer.

But he didn’t stay in that solemn posture for long. He simply handed me the glass of milk. “I only took one sip. You can drink from this side.”

I accepted the glass, momentarily dazed. The side he’d drunk from still had a stream of milk slowly sliding down the transparent cup wall. I turned the cup once in my hand and, as if possessed, gently pressed my lips to the very spot where he had drunk—not licking, not drinking, just lightly touching it.

Lucifer’s eyes widened as he stared at me.

Only then did I realize what I was doing. I quickly tilted the cup and took a sip.

We were standing quite close. I could clearly see his face: his young, fair skin, his features so flawless they looked painted. I gave my head a little shake, handed the glass back to him, and said, “Your Majesty, I think I should get some sleep.”

Then I spun around and fled toward the room as if running for my life.

“Isar.”

The moment he said that name, my eyes instantly blurred.

“Isar.” His voice trembled slightly in the cool breeze. “Has anyone ever told you who gave you that name?”

I breathed deeply, the cold air stabbing painfully at my sinuses. “My father.”

It was a long time before Lucifer replied. “Then do you know what ‘Isar’ means in the ancient language of Heaven?”

“No.”

“It means ‘Radiance of the Sun.’”

“That’s right,” he continued. “You are a child of light. That was already determined the moment you were born. When your mother cast the divination, everyone knew that the two of us could not coexist in the same world. When I found out you were Michael, I once thought maybe that everything could change. But I was wrong.”

I turned back, watching the light snowfall fluttering gently down, melting upon the ground.

“I’m living very happily with Lilith and Mammon, you know?”

“I know.”

“So don’t do those meaningless things anymore.”

“What did I do?”

“Lashing out emotionally at me this afternoon, trying to dig up news about me. Even when I simply went to Schmir, you had to ask all about it…… Your Highness, not even my wife cares about me this much.”

For a moment, I was too embarrassed to say anything at all.

He had found out.

“Please don’t misunderstand. I have no ulterior motive. I just…I knew coming here was a mistake. When God first assigned me this mission, I didn’t even know why I—” I started to ramble. I paused, gathered my thoughts, and exhaled deeply. “I’ll leave.”

“I’ve already moved on.” Lucifer stood in the darkness, his smile bitter. “So why do you insist on pulling me back down?”

It felt like something inside my chest cracked wide open.

I rushed forward and embraced him tightly.

I leaned against his neck, strands of my red hair falling against his black clothes. In the night, the only sounds were our breathing, echoing deep and shallow through the lonely air.

“I won’t ask for much. Just let me hold you for a while. Just a little while.” I didn’t want to leave. Even speaking another word felt like a waste of time.

I was deeply grateful to fate—for letting me touch him again.

This kind of happiness was like a delicate crystal glass, so fragile that a single touch could shatter it.

I had long since learned how to live bravely without him.

I’d grown used to smiling alone at night, thinking of him.

Now, I only hoped I could see his smile more often.

See him speak spiritedly of his dreams, his future, his hopes.

Whether or not those things included me no longer mattered.

I knew this was a betrayal of God’s will. I knew it meant nothing.

But I still couldn’t help it. I buried my face in his chest.

Lucifer’s voice sounded softly by my ear:

“You know, I’m no longer one of the divine race. I have a new life now. A new path. I belong to the Demon Realm—to the darkness. And you, Michael, are my enemy. Back then, when you pushed me from the Mountain of Creation, you already made your choice. Didn’t you?”

Cold air surrounded us. Frost crystals settled on Lucifer’s shoulders and stubbornly refused to melt.

I couldn’t explain.

I wanted to tell him everything. But in my position, I couldn’t say a word. And even if I did—what difference would it make?

I couldn’t leave Heaven. He couldn’t leave the Demon Realm.

We were destined to forget each other. Better, then, to lighten the burden of longing.

“If you’ve made your choice, then follow it through. Don’t regret it.” His tone was calm.

“I don’t regret it.” I looked up at him, my throat dry as sand. “Your Majesty Lucifer, you’ve made the Demon Realm into a paradise others can only dream of. You are truly magnificent. My admiration for you hasn’t changed, not one bit.”

And so, I also knew. That I was already part of the past.

Lucifer gazed into my eyes.

I understood that the longer I looked at him, the more it would hurt. But once our eyes met, I couldn’t look away.

“Let’s pretend none of this happened… I’m sorry,” I whispered.

“What’s the use of ‘sorry’? You impulsively hugged me, not even realizing how long it will take for me to be able to forget again.” Lucifer didn’t look at me. He stared at the starry, snowing sky, and sighed lightly. “…Another seven thousand years, perhaps.”

The stars shimmered and trembled in the night. Six-petaled snowflakes danced and overlapped in the cold wind.

Almost uncontrollably, I stepped closer and took his hand, gradually tightening my grip.

At last, he turned to look at me.

The distant coldness that had lingered in his eyes since my arrival in the Demon Realm vanished.

He looked at me with a gentleness laced with sorrow, tilting his head slightly, and pressed his lips softly against mine.

In that moment, it was as if my soul was drawn from my body by that light kiss, taken to another world.

As reason collapsed, an overwhelming tide of longing drowned me completely. I cradled his face and responded with careful tenderness, and before long, we were lost in a kiss so deep we couldn’t separate ourselves.

That night was beautiful—and terrifying.

Because we knew—

No one would come to interrupt us again.

…………

……

Although Rhodheoga knew little of true daylight, it was always brilliantly lit. The number of lamps glowing at any given time was enough to tell the hour, so I knew that I had woken early.

Golden and black feathers lay scattered across the soft bedding and deep red carpet. Naked, Lucifer held me, his black wings enfolding us both. I lay against his chest, watching him until he stirred, then feigned sleep as he quietly rose, slipped on a robe, tucked the blanket around me, brushed a kiss against my lips, and spread his wings to leave the palace.

Lying there alone, I thought back to what had happened on the balcony, and the bed felt all the more cold and hollow. I wrapped the blanket tighter around my bare body…

The truth is, being with him again hadn’t been my intention. Though I had kissed him, a kiss and what followed are two very different things. At the time, I’d thought that once I kissed him, I would leave, quickly.

But even after years apart, our physical chemistry remained undeniable. One kiss led naturally from the balcony to the bedroom, and in the bedroom, our clothes fell away just as naturally. By the time I realized we had gone too far, he was already over me, about to cross a line I hadn’t meant to breach.

I covered my eyes, unwilling to recall how it happened.

But the memory of that night had etched itself deep like a brand…

“No… not anymore. I’m sorry, my head’s spinning, I don’t know how it came to this…” I had pushed against his chest, desperate to escape the moment.

He didn’t force me. Nor did he pull away. He simply continued to kiss me, slowly, deeply. His fingers roamed gently over my body, stroking and coaxing it to respond. Wherever he touched, it was as if my skin stopped obeying my mind, quivering with involuntary surrender. Soon, he sensed me relaxing. He lowered himself again.

I tried to push him away once more, but he didn’t advance, nor did he retreat. He hovered at the edge, maintaining the kiss, caressing my skin. Each time I resisted, he edged slightly forward. And each time I tried again, he pressed a little deeper. He was firm and hot, but his control was terrifying, precise, patient.

Lucifer’s size had always been difficult to accommodate. My body protested, but I hadn’t even realized how far he’d already gone. Instinctively, I shrank back—only for him to gently push forward again and stop.

The sudden fullness overwhelmed me. I gasped. “I said let’s not do this… How much did you—?”

He brushed aside my hair and smiled as though soothing a child. “About a third. Should I pull out?”

I felt like I’d committed some grave, deranged mistake. I shook my head: “Get out, now.”

I twisted beneath him, but in trying to get away, my leg caught his—causing him to lean forward, deeper. My face went cold. I couldn’t even speak when I looked at him.

“Now it’s halfway. Honestly… there’s not much point in stopping,” he said.

Still, he withdrew slightly, though not completely. Instead, he held me down there and began to stroke me again, his voice light as he smiled. “Little Lightning’s grown bigger.”

“Shut up! It was never little!” My face burned, and soon I was gasping from his expert hands. Waves of pleasure crashed through me, one after another, almost pushing me close to the edge several times.

It wasn’t until much later that I noticed his own breath had become ragged. By the time I did, he was already inside, slowly, carefully. And this time, no matter what I said, he didn’t stop. He held my resisting hands gently, entering all the way.

It felt as though even my heartbeat had been filled. I could barely breathe before he began to move—pulling out, then returning with deliberate force. Gradually, his rhythm grew stronger, deeper…

What had begun as a tentative exploration turned into something irrevocably real.

Since his fall, Lucifer had changed—he was no longer a Seraph but solely male now. Demons were powerful by nature; Lucifer, as a fallen divine, was many times more. By dawn, I was too exhausted to even speak. “Drained through and through” barely described it.

I covered my eyes with the back of my hand, thinking of the way he had taken me, again and again, how he kissed my earlobe so desperately in the heat of it all. And despite the intimacy, what remained now was a heavy, blistering shame. It overwhelmed even the memory of pleasure. I only wished I could forget.

Suddenly, I realized where this overwhelming shame was coming from.

From Lilith, who lived in the palace across from mine, and from Mammon, who was likely off somewhere raising hell.

To be swept away by passion and desire like this, no matter how it began, the ending would always be the same.

Though he had already left, the door was open, and no demon guard stood watch. Still, I was imprisoned here, in this cell saturated with his scent, utterly powerless, reduced to nothing more than his captive.

So what if I had become the Archangel? So what if I held the title of Vice Regent of Heaven? So what if Lucifer was now the enemy, the Sovereign of Demons?

None of it mattered. Nothing I did could change a thing.

Even if I lived in paradise, even with six golden wings strong enough to cross the Seven Heavens and the Seven Hells—

in the end, I still could not fly out of his cage.