Chapter 7
Cedric hated Edgar for not showing him the slightest interest.
Because he liked him, he hated him even more.
When Edgar looked at Riette beside him with loving eyes instead of himself, Cedric felt like he would go blind with jealousy…
He was hurt countless times by Edgar’s attitude of acting cold only toward him.
It wasn’t like that from the beginning though.
When we first met, you were definitely kind to me too.
After their first meeting when Cedric lost his heart to Edgar, he was formally introduced to him through Riette.
But from the time they started getting to know each other, Edgar began treating him like a rival… and at some point, he had built an insurmountable wall between them.
Then ‘that time’ finally came.
〈Ret. If it’s okay with you, would you be my partner at the ball?〉
The sight of Edgar asking Riette to be his dance partner right before his eyes.
Seeing that shy expression, Cedric’s vision went white with rage, and he interfered by asking Riette to dance with him as well.
Cedric had already told her that he had unrequited love for Edgar. Moreover, Riette was in a position of supporting such a Cedric.
Because of that, Riette couldn’t readily accept Edgar and was troubled, so she just took Cedric’s hand… but Edgar, who didn’t know the circumstances, seemed to be quite shocked.
He must have been very angry thinking he had been interfered with by me.
But still… was that something to break off relations over?
Cedric was also quite shocked at that time.
Because he newly realized that he was ultimately nothing to Edgar – someone who could be cut off so easily.
After that day when only wounds remained between them…
The relationship between the two began to fall apart like never before. Of course, it was a rift that Cedric felt was one-sided.
That actually made him more venomous. He deliberately lingered around Edgar even more, trying to force him to look at him.
However, Edgar only kept Cedric in check consistently.
Even though they once called each other by pet names, albeit superficially, and despite their bickering, they had been within the boundaries of friendship…
Everything that Edgar and he had built up with difficulty, everything he had clung to so persistently that it could be considered sordid… disappeared in an instant.
Cedric was withering away day by day.
〈Help Eddie be able to give up on you.〉
So he even asked Riette for help.
〈You said you’d help me, that you’d support me, right?〉
Even knowing he was being unreasonable, he lashed out.
Because he was anxious and impatient about losing him.
Above all, Edgar had romantic views where he didn’t care much about a partner’s secondary gender but only preferred women in terms of biological sex.
Considering their current relationship, which was more distant than ordinary acquaintances, it would be impossible for him to win Edgar’s heart no matter how much he acted cute or charming beside him.
Especially since Edgar’s feelings for Riette were solid.
So, for there to be even a gap for him to squeeze into, he first had to make Edgar give up on Riette.
〈Cedy…〉
At that time, Riette was looking at Cedric with pity. Her feelings must have been complicated. As a result, thanks to her agreeing to help, Cedric was still looking at the hopeful side until then.
He was aware that there was a lot of friction and hatred building up during that time, but even so, Cedric seemed to have succeeded in making Edgar give up on Riette in the end.
He had made him give up his first love, whom he considered his greatest enemy.
Cedric thought this was just the beginning.
He believed that someday an opportunity would come for him too.
Just once, if there was a gap he could squeeze into, there would be a chance to make Edgar think of him differently… he was convinced of that.
He learned how arrogant and complacent that thinking was not long after.
〈To throw himself and lose his life at such a young age…〉
〈Why on earth did he do that?〉
〈Well, there were rumors it was because of unrequited love.〉
〈Oh my, he must have really loved someone. How pitiful.〉
〈But he was hoping for something beyond his station. Trying to steal the Grand Duke’s son’s omega…〉
Did he ever imagine that Edgar would run away from him by taking his own life?
That wasn’t what he intended.
He didn’t mean to drive him that far…
Cedric completely collapsed.
As if trapped in an endlessly sinking deep sea, heavy grief and guilt crushed his body.
Let it be a dream.
Let it be someone’s cruel joke.
But no matter how much he denied reality, all that remained was empty space and Edgar’s vanished shadow.
His greed, his selfish and one-sided love had ultimately driven the most precious person to death.
The moment he realized that fact, it felt like his heart was being torn to shreds.
Even when Riette said she was struggling too and scolded him harshly to pull himself together and endure it together, Cedric simply couldn’t get up.
Half out of his mind, he didn’t even know how he breathed and lived each day, and every night he was tormented by nightmares of Edgar dying or disappearing in the blink of an eye.
He just… hoped this hell would end.
Now, he wouldn’t wish for anything anymore.
Please.
If only he could just be alive and stay by my side…
He repeated only futile, far too late resolutions and regretted. Why do people only realize after they’ve lost something? All that remained for Cedric was regret for being too late and endless emptiness.
Then one day.
〈There’s a divine artifact that can turn back time.〉
Riette came to visit after a long time and said.
〈It’s called Chronos. Have you ever heard of it?〉
The old tome she presented contained information about an ancient temple that worshipped Chronos, the god of time.
It said that while only records remained, the Chronos temple and divine artifact had not been discovered to this day.
It was a legendary story from an old book, but at Riette’s words suggesting he try placing hope in it once… Cedric’s eyes opened.
After that, he began scouring the entire continent to find information related to Chronos.
It might have been folklore that she brought up as a lie to get him back on his feet, but Cedric, who was already standing at the edge of life’s cliff, clung only to that one remaining hope.
He didn’t think about anything else.
Seasons changed countless times…
Finally, Cedric discovered the Chronos temple and the divine artifact within it.
It appeared before his eyes one day as if the temple itself had consciousness and approached him first.
〈Turn back time. Let me… meet Eddie.〉
Even if all of this was a false illusion, it didn’t matter. He just wanted to meet a living Edgar.
That was all he wished for.
〈Very well. That’s what I came for.〉
The ‘Will of Chronos’ dwelling in the divine artifact easily granted Cedric’s request.
Though it added an admonishing warning that there was only one chance to rewind time, and once rewound, he would never be able to find it anywhere again.
〈…I understand.〉
That one chance he had obtained.
He must not take it back.
When he opened his eyes again, Cedric was able to meet the living Edgar he had so desperately wanted. At that time… in that place where they had celebrated Edgar’s twentieth birthday.
Under soft, fine golden hair, Edgar’s clear green eyes looking at Riette sparkled in the light.
The warm atmosphere, the tactile sensation of air against his skin, clear vision, distinct hearing.
At first, he seemed to be in a daze because the situation was too real to be an illusion.
〈Get out. Just, get out! Leave me alone.〉
Suddenly Edgar acted differently from what he remembered and drove out Riette and Cedric.
Even in the midst of this, Cedric couldn’t grasp the situation and was bewildered.
〈Why is Eddie acting like that? Don’t you have any idea?〉
When Riette tapped his dazed back and asked about the cause of Edgar’s sudden behavior… gradually regaining his sense of reality, Cedric finally realized that he had truly returned to the past through time.
〈…I don’t know.〉
That’s how he answered Riette.
That he didn’t know.
But inwardly, he thought that perhaps because he had rewound the timeline, Edgar’s actions and reactions might have changed significantly from before the regression due to that influence.
Whatever it was… it was good.
Just the fact that Edgar was alive like this made him happy, and being called by his pet name again like before made him so happy that he felt he could let everything go.
So he decided to give up.
He didn’t like Edgar being with someone else, but if he ended up with Riette, it seemed like it would be okay. After all, he wanted Riette the most too.
It was Cedric’s own compromise point that he had barely found.
In this life, may Edgar be happy with Riette.
And that happiness would come sooner than expected. Actually, Cedric knew that Riette also had feelings for Edgar.
So, he had done something rather devious.
Before her favorable feelings toward Edgar could develop into love, he pretended not to know her feelings and spoke first, saying he liked Edgar so please support him, cutting off the bud from the beginning.
If he hadn’t interfered like that, the two of them surely…
‘Would have worked out well.’
Now it was time to put everything back in its place.
Something that could be resolved if only he gave up.
He couldn’t actively step forward to bring the two together, but since they would naturally end up together well if left alone anyway, he would just watch quietly.
‘I just… watching is enough.’
As long as he doesn’t suddenly disappear.
As long as he stays within sight.
As long as he proves his existence every moment.
…Not knowing any of this, this count’s son.
“Hey, us. Should we go on a trip together sometime?”
“……”
“To have time to get to know each other better…”
“That time should be yours alone.”
“…T-time for me to get to know you too.”
“……”
“Isn’t there anywhere you want to go?”
“…Don’t know.”
“Then places you haven’t been?”
While going down Mount Burden, Cedric glared at Edgar, who was chattering away to soothe his own mood.
That face laughing “hehe” without knowing others’ feelings was hateful. He wished he would make such expressions for him too, and felt unnecessarily upset.
But even so, he couldn’t hate him.
…Perhaps for the first time, Edgar’s voice pouring out so many words to him sounded pleasant to hear.
“I’ve never been to the seaside.”
“Ah, the sea is nice. Our family has a seaside resort. We could go there, or if you prefer somewhere else, we could book a separate inn. How about it?”
“…Do whatever you want.”
So Cedric deliberately pretended to be more sulky while walking slowly, listening for a long time to that voice chattering like a chirping bird beside him.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
