38
“Eddie. Are you going to sleep already?”
“Mm, no. Just a little while longer.”
Looking at the time, it was still a bit early for bedtime.
“Can I stay next to you until you sleep?”
I had just finished washing and was sitting on the bed in my fluffy robe when Cedric quietly asked for permission.
He must be bored if he’s just going to sleep.
‘…Can’t be helped.’
I felt a strange anxiety that we shouldn’t be staying close together, but my heart softened again when I thought about coldly kicking him out.
Since Cedric was standing behind the door like a dog watching its owner’s mood, staring at me continuously.
I silently patted the blanket on the bed. Cedric, taking it as permission without me having to say anything, came in with a bright smile.
The weight settling down as the side of the bed shook felt particularly sensitive. I pretended to change positions to get comfortable and subtly moved toward the head of the bed, then turned my body toward Cedric and leaned back.
Fortunately, he didn’t seem to notice that I had adjusted my position to create distance.
When Cedric lightly turned his body to face me, our eyes met. After a brief silence, feeling awkward, I spoke first.
“So what are you going to do until bedtime?”
“Want to continue the conversation we were having last time?”
“Last time?”
“When the 2nd Prince called us, we couldn’t talk much then.”
…Ah. Come to think of it, that’s right.
I remembered when we were trying to have a proper conversation alone while playing chess.
We couldn’t have a long conversation because Castian called us to the salon, but I remembered that even sharing a few words of our inner thoughts deepened our sense of intimacy.
“I like that you’re showing interest in me.”
I was about to say “as if you didn’t show interest before…” but stopped. It’s true that I hadn’t shown interest until recently.
“Alright. Let’s talk.”
I hesitated for a moment then nodded. But I couldn’t readily bring up the questions I had inside.
Because what I’d been curious about all along was things like what his romantic preferences were, whether he had a preferred type…
‘Back then I wasn’t conscious of him in that way.’
It felt awkward to talk about romantic preferences with a friend I’d unintentionally fooled around with for one night. I was worried he might think it strange.
I’d finally gotten close to Cedric… I felt regretful wondering how this awkward distance had come about.
Unaware of my inner thoughts, Cedric smiled with the corners of his mouth turning up.
“Is there something you want to ask?”
“Hmm.”
Then I remembered something and started talking.
“Ah… you said you have someone you like.”
“Yeah.”
“Tell me about that. What do you like about that person?”
I remembered Cedric lamenting like a curse that his crush was incredibly oblivious. But if he still likes them despite that, they must be quite charming?
“They’re cute.”
“……”
“And… even though they don’t seem like it, they’re kind.”
“……”
“I know they’re a good person, so that’s why I like them.”
Cedric’s eyes curved as he looked directly at me.
“…I see.”
Since he’s talking while looking into my eyes, it feels strangely uncomfortable as if he’s talking to me. I unconsciously avoided his gaze.
But that person definitely isn’t me. Recognizing that fact, the strangely churning feeling calmed down and became bitter in a slightly different way.
…Am I annoyed listening to someone else’s lovey-dovey romance story? I don’t understand my own feelings.
I spoke slowly.
“There are many good people in the world.”
“That’s right.”
“There are probably many people who are good and would love and cherish you.”
“I suppose so?”
“But you still like that person.”
“If I could control my heart as I wanted, I wouldn’t suffer.”
That’s true. So that guy who lacks nothing is hanging onto that crush who doesn’t even look at him.
He must really like them a lot.
“…Who is it really. You’re just making me curious.”
Even at my grumbling, Cedric still didn’t seem to have any intention of revealing it directly and just smiled. Soon he dropped his head and prepared to lie down.
“Can I have a lap pillow?”
“Huh? Yeah.”
I was in a very comfortable position leaning against the headboard with my legs stretched out. When I readily agreed, Cedric sleepily and slowly rested his head on my thigh and lay down. His cheek was slightly pressed forward, making it plump.
In that state, he looked up at me…
…That was somehow strangely…
“Is the place that got chafed last time okay?”
Suddenly Cedric lightly placed his palm on my thigh. He just lightly placed it so his fingers would go to the inside of my thigh, but I was startled and trembled my thigh.
My face grew hot at the sensation shooting to my core. I was embarrassed that I seemed to have overreacted.
“It’s f-fine.”
I was flustered and answered blindly without even understanding the intent of the question. And right after, I realized what that question meant.
Thigh… chafed place…
He had deliberately brought up what happened that day.
‘Why on earth.’
I thought we were just not mentioning that incident to each other and trying to forget it as if nothing happened. My head feels like it’s going blank. The atmosphere became awkward in an instant. Of course, maybe only I feel that way.
…More importantly, this is a big problem.
‘It won’t show, right?’
I’m talking about my little guy who half-hardened and perked up inside my pants.
‘Crazy bastard. I’m a crazy bastard!’
You’re raising your head here without understanding the situation?
‘Is this thing broken or something?’
I’m flustered.
Just a light touch and I got stimulated and erected. Even though it’s my own physiological response, I couldn’t believe it.
…It doesn’t show from the outside yet.
Unless he directly gropes around, Cedric couldn’t know the situation inside my pants.
My heart started beating irregularly and I felt too embarrassed to make eye contact with Cedric. Like an anxious person, I was just chewing on my innocent lips while looking somewhere else.
Cedric was staring intently at me like that.
As the silence lengthened, Cedric fidgeted.
“Eddie.”
“……”
“Do you hate me mentioning what happened then?”
He rubbed his cheek against my thigh like he was pouting, which was driving me crazy. I couldn’t concentrate on the conversation and was desperate to manage my little guy who was trying to get erect.
I sighed deeply and rubbed my face.
“No, you… weren’t you trying to quietly forget about it?”
“……”
“I naturally thought you were too.”
Cedric had no answer. The guy who had been lying on my knee without moving, just blinking, soon raised his upper body abruptly. His face looking at me head-on was so close that my heart dropped without me realizing.
“Not at all.”
“Ce, Cedy, wait…!”
“Eddie, I…”
Cedric, who had been leaning close, was supporting himself on my leg when he suddenly seemed to feel something strange and glanced down. Realizing that gaze was fixed right between my legs, my mind went blank.
Ah. This is a disaster.
My little guy, who had gotten even harder without distinguishing place or partner, had pressed against the fabric of my pants, revealing its slightly bulged shape completely.
Cedric stared for a while as if seeing something fascinating, then placed his palm between my legs.
…This crazy…
“Why is… this erect?”
“Ah, hey! Hand! Move your hand!”
I want to hide in a mouse hole right now if there was one.
I quickly grabbed and removed Cedric’s hand as if burned. And I put one leg down from the bed intending to run away, but Cedric held me back so I couldn’t do that either.
“Should I help you?”
“What? No, hey! Hurry up and move…”
“We’ve already jerked off together anyway, so what’s there to be embarrassed about?”
“How is that the same as this!”
Back then you weren’t in your right mind, but now you are!
Of course I was in my right mind both then and now… but the feeling you experience is different depending on whether the other person is in a dazed state or a normal state.
I tried pushing Cedric away with all my strength but he didn’t budge. Cedric, who was looking down at me struggling while supporting himself on the bed like trapping me in his arms, soon grabbed my thickened pants hem and began touching it heavily.
“Hgh…”
As a tingling sensation spread from below, strength left my body.
“If you don’t like it, slap me or something.”
“……”
“I’ll get thrown off.”
“You were talking about your crush and then suddenly… ngh…”
I was somehow angry and hit his shoulder hard, but Cedric didn’t even blink. He just gently stroked over my clothes as if to tease me, then fluttered his long eyelashes and murmured quietly.
“This is just helping out.”
“…Why, why are you helping with this?”
That time was an unavoidable accident.
But now, it’s not.
You could just pretend not to notice.
Cedric has no answer. I want to hear his inner thoughts but he keeps everything tightly hidden and won’t reveal anything.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
