But he… was already on the verge of losing it.
Just imagining the two of them together made his eyes burn with jealousy. The fury roiled inside him like a storm, so fierce he wanted to tear the whole damn world apart.
Today had been pure chaos—moving things, tidying up, hours of fussing back and forth. By the time they’d finished, the sky had already turned dark. Chi Zhan let out a yawn and exchanged goodnights with Chu Xingxiao.
With his long limbs, Chu Xingxiao barely managed to curl himself up on the couch. He obediently murmured, “Goodnight, gege.”
“Goodnight,” Chi Zhan replied, then shut the bedroom door behind him.
After setting his alarm, he drifted off quickly. But tonight’s sleep was far from peaceful. Maybe it was the scent he’d picked up earlier—that lingering smell. In his dreams, he found himself back in that narrow, suffocating room, pinned down by someone overpowering.
Only this time, the touches were even more brazen. That person gripped his wrists, pulling him close while panting low against his ear.
“Gege, help me…”
The lemony fragrance in the dream was maddening, sharp and sweet, flooding his senses until he couldn’t think straight. He struggled fiercely, but the man’s strength was overwhelming.
Silken sheets slipped past his vision. Chi Zhan’s eyes flew open. Blinding white light filled his gaze—and he saw the man’s face clearly.
It was Chu Xingxiao.
Chi Zhan jolted awake, gasping for breath. The room was pitch black, not a single sliver of moonlight slipping in. The silence dragged him back to reality, but his mind was still in disarray.
…Why the hell would he dream of that person—and it was Chu Xingxiao, of all people?
Absolutely absurd.
He glanced at the clock. He’d only been asleep for an hour… but lying back down did nothing. Sleep refused to come. With a sigh, he got up and headed to the living room for a glass of water.
What he didn’t expect was that Chu Xingxiao was still awake.
The room was thick with the scent of alcohol, tinged with the same sweet, citrusy note from his dream. Chi Zhan’s steps faltered.
Reality and dream, illusion and truth—blurred together so completely he couldn’t tell them apart for a moment.
…Was he still dreaming?
Only a small nightlight was on. Several empty bottles were strewn across the coffee table. Chi Zhan hesitated, then walked over.
“Still drinking?”
Chu Xingxiao was slouched on the couch, silent, sipping from a bottle. He didn’t even flinch at the sound of Chi Zhan’s voice. His eyes looked a little glazed, drunk.
…How do you even get tipsy off fruit wine?
They had work tomorrow. Chi Zhan reached out, trying to snatch the bottle from him.
“Cut it out. Don’t tell me you’re skipping work?”
He grabbed for it, but couldn’t wrestle it free. Instead, Chu Xingxiao gave a slight tug—and pulled Chi Zhan straight into his arms.
“I don’t feel good…” he murmured, his voice low and raspy in the darkness. His eyes were slightly red, the usual sunshine he wore during the day completely gone. At night, he became someone else—like a puppy curled in the shadows, licking its wounds in silence.
“Don’t cry. What happened?” Chi Zhan reached up and ruffled his hair. “It’s just a leak in the ceiling. Don’t be so upset.”
“…It’s not that.”
“Then what? Something at work? Someone bullied you? Or you’re stuck on an idea?”
“None of that…”
Chu Xingxiao wrapped his arms around Chi Zhan, pulling him in tighter. Chi Zhan gave a tug but didn’t manage to break free—he was instantly exasperated.
“Can you let go of me first?”
Chu Xingxiao didn’t seem to hear. If anything, his grip tightened.
“…Fine,” Chi Zhan muttered, giving up on reasoning with a drunk. Spotting a glass on the table and feeling parched, he poured himself a drink.
Chu Xingxiao rested his head against Chi Zhan’s neck, mumbling words into his skin. Chi Zhan sipped the drink slowly, listening as he murmured, “I… fell in love with someone… someone impossible.”
A relationship problem?
Chi Zhan hadn’t seen that coming at all.
So young and already tangled in love? Then again, he was a romance target—it would be strange if he didn’t have love troubles.
The reminder hit Chi Zhan like a delayed slap.
Right. That was the setting.
In the beginning, Chu Xingxiao had left him with the impression of a little brother next door who needed looking after. And since no players had shown up, Chi Zhan had completely forgotten that part of the scenario.
“Impossible? Who is it?” he asked, trying to be helpful. “Is it a status thing? Don’t look down on yourself. You’re a huge star—you can date anyone you want.”
Chu Xingxiao slowly shook his head.
“No… it’s not okay. He can’t… I’m scared… it’s not okay…”
The same words, looping over and over.
“What’s not okay?” Chi Zhan found the drink surprisingly tasty—sweet and sour with a fizzy aftertaste. He took a few more sips before realizing something was off.
…He felt dizzy.
He picked up the bottle, peering at the label under the dim light. The alcohol content was much higher than he’d expected. It tasted mild, but this was definitely one of those bottles he normally only had a few sips of.
“……”
Chu Xingxiao had downed three, maybe four bottles? Kid could really hold his liquor. No wonder he was mumbling like a fool.
Chi Zhan set his glass down on the coffee table. But Chu Xingxiao reached out, took the glass—and drank from it himself.
“Stop drinking!”
Chi Zhan reached for it again, only for Chu Xingxiao to grab his wrist and twist gently, locking him in place. With his other hand, he raised the glass and took a slow sip.
His lips touched the exact spot Chi Zhan had just drunk from.
“……”
“I want to drink,” Chu Xingxiao said with a mischievous little smile. “You don’t care about me… he doesn’t care about me… none of you care about me…”
Right now, Chu Xingxiao looked exactly like someone drowning in heartbreak and using alcohol as a lifeline.
Yet when he lowered his gaze, his long lashes cast shadows under his eyes. The little mole beneath his left eye shimmered faintly in the low light.
So soft. So heartbreakingly fragile.
Chi Zhan couldn’t help but ask, “Who did you fall for?”
“I love…” Chu Xingxiao shook his head, letting out a bitter laugh. “He’ll never love me.”
Then he reached for the bottle again.
Chi Zhan just wanted to snatch the damn cup back. Using his glass was bad enough, but how much more was this guy planning to drink?!
