The Main Character is Obsessed With a Foreign Substance

He hadn’t intended to say that much, but for some reason, he got angry yesterday. It was because he was irritated by the clear face that reached out to him without reserve.

“Ha…”

He must be someone who had never been disliked by anyone. That boy exuded an atmosphere unique to people who grew up receiving only love. Seunghyun frowned as he recalled the boy who radiated an aura of happiness just to look at.

Until now, quite a few people had approached Seunghyun with inadequate sympathy. But the endings were all unpleasant. Because what they wanted from Seunghyun was the image of someone suffering from an unfortunate life. They were just hypocrites who felt satisfied with themselves for sympathizing with and comforting such a pitiful person.

But in fact, Seunghyun had never thought of himself as pitiful. Rather, he quite liked his current isolated life due to various rumors. Until the big incident in winter of his third year of middle school, he had to endure all sorts of annoying situations because of his appearance.

‘Seunghyun, I think you’re a very special person.’

Just because his appearance was slightly superior to others, he was always made out to be a “special person.” And if he was even slightly different from their imagination, he would hear merciless words. He felt like a pretty doll meant to fulfill their fantasies.

It was true that the math teacher at that time had attempted to sexually harass him. But it was thwarted before he could even try. Thanks to his parents who had worried about him and made him learn various martial arts from a young age, Seunghyun was now a considerable martial artist. The issue at that time became more about Seunghyun beating the teacher up and sending him to the hospital than about the math teacher attempting to sexually harass a student.

But neither story was convenient to spread. Neither the story of a male teacher with a family harboring ill intentions toward a young male student, nor of a student who beat him severely. Anyway, Seunghyun had to give up the high school he was aiming for and move to a different region to attend another school.

But rumors persistently followed Seunghyun. Despite the story having unclear origins, people were tempted by the provocative tale and added their own embellishments. People who were interested in Seunghyun’s beautiful appearance began spreading more malicious rumors because he acted coldly and unfriendly. He couldn’t help but snicker at the rumor that he had sold his body to get test questions and achieve good grades.

However, Seunghyun had no particular intention of correcting these rumors. Rather, thanks to the intensifying rumors, no one bothered to talk to him, and as time passed, people stayed away from him, which was very comfortable.

‘Thanks for helping me look.’

He was just annoyed that someone else had invaded his hideout where he could spend time alone. Moreover, they had the same habit of writing only the initials of their names, and the boy had tried to take his book without permission. He had spoken sharply out of displeasure, but somehow, seeing the clueless appearance, he was reluctant to leave him alone.

‘Thank you anyway.’

Seunghyun frowned at the smiling face that didn’t have a single dark corner. Anyway, that boy would probably know who he was, and would be pretending not to know about those strange rumors. Determined not to be swayed by that detestable appearance, he deliberately bit the soft flesh inside his mouth and maintained an even colder expression.

‘By the way, what’s your name?’

‘Well, I transferred recently, so I don’t know much.’

But to think he really didn’t know him! Seunghyun was momentarily flustered and couldn’t say anything. So he impulsively told the boy his name.

‘This is something I really like, try it once.’

And he regretted it when he saw the boy come back the next day, making all sorts of excuses to talk to him. I shouldn’t have told him. Seunghyun, sensitive to others’ atmospheres, realized that the boy had heard about his rumors from someone in the meantime. Because the previously normal boy was now watching him cautiously with strangely nervous gestures.

‘Why? Are you also curious if I sucked math dick?’

‘…What?’

He wanted to distort the boy’s innocent face. He wanted to embarrass him for pretending not to know, which was so detestable. Due to that impulse, his words might have been harsher than usual.

‘Don’t do weird things and get lost. You’re bothering me.’

‘…!’

The boy’s shocked face flickered before his eyes. As intended, he managed to break the boy’s pathetically maintained calm face, but for some reason, it didn’t feel good. The boy, unable to properly retort to the harsh words, just lowered his head deeply and apologized in a small voice.

‘…Sorry for disturbing you.’

As the dejected boy turned around to leave, Seunghyun unconsciously tried to take a step toward him. Surprised at himself, Seunghyun stood frozen in place.

It was the same now. Seunghyun felt the urge to approach the boy who was endlessly contemplating whether to enter the old school building. He had started to leave the classroom but stood frozen in place when he saw the snacks and jelly still piled high on the desk.

If, if the boy approached him again this time, then…

He reached for the fruit jelly that the boy had left last time. The transparent bag crinkled in his hand.

Seunghyun slowly turned his head as he heard the small footsteps approaching hesitantly.

***

‘…Wake up.’

‘…’

‘Suhwan.’

“…!”

Suhwan opened his eyes wide at the sweet voice that kept lingering in his ears. He stopped his feet that were habitually heading toward the old school building and stood in place, rubbing his flushed cheeks with his hands.

He could still feel the sensation on his lips. The feeling of the boy’s soft lips firmly pressing against his own wouldn’t easily disappear. Suhwan took a deep breath with his thoroughly reddened face.

The appearance of behaving prickly like a stray cat had disappeared, and Seunghyun, who had revealed his true self at some point, acted so sweetly that honey seemed to drip from him. And of course, Suhwan didn’t dislike Seunghyun’s behavior at all. Rather, the problem was that he liked it too much.

‘Does Seunghyun… like me?’

Suhwan pressed his pounding heart with his hand and thought to himself. It was absurd to have such worries after even kissing yesterday, but surprisingly, they had never actually said those words to each other. Yesterday, just as they were about to, the security guard happened to patrol for the first time in a long while, causing them both to flee the old school building in panic. After getting outside, they somehow became embarrassed and couldn’t speak to each other. So they parted without confirming each other’s feelings.

‘I think… I like him.’

Suhwan murmured inwardly, tracing his lips with his finger, which had become rough from rubbing them all day.

At first, he was interested in and concerned about Seunghyun, who gave off a different atmosphere from others. After learning that most of the malicious rumors about Seunghyun were false, he might have felt some sympathy for him. But Seunghyun was a strong person who didn’t need his trivial sympathy.

Just the thought that such a beautiful and strong person might like him made Suhwan’s heart swell. He wanted to hurry and tell him. That he liked him too, that he had been liking him all along. Then he would smile brightly at him.

Boom.

“…Huh?”

Just as he took a step, the ground shook violently as if an earthquake had occurred. Suhwan’s body wobbled. Barely maintaining his balance, Suhwan shook his head vigorously as he saw the world spinning before his eyes.

“What is this…?”

Boom boom.

The world spun around. Feeling dizzy, Suhwan sat down on the ground. He didn’t feel well. It felt like he would vomit everything inside at any moment.

“Ugh.”

What’s happening? Why is it so… painful?

It felt like someone was kneading his brain like dough. Suhwan reached out with trembling hands. His attempt to crawl forward was blocked by another wave of intense pain. Suhwan opened his eyes wide.

‘Seung… hyun…’

The last thing he thought of was the beautiful boy’s face smiling brightly at him. With that, Suhwan lost consciousness.

And that was Suhwan’s last appearance in ‘this world.’

***

“…He’s late.”

Seunghyun murmured softly as he lifted his eyes from the book he was reading.

The visitor who always came around this time was quiet today. Since full-scale demolition work on the old school building would begin soon, they wouldn’t be able to meet here anymore and would need to decide on a new meeting place… But he had assumed they would still meet here today.

The fact that he hadn’t shown up yet, did yesterday’s events shock that child too much? Seunghyun tilted his handsome face and fell into thought.

Kissing him yesterday was somewhat impulsive. Suhwan, who had learned about his birthday, had boasted that he would give him a present, but then trembled like a wet puppy while asking what he wanted, looking so cute that Seunghyun felt the urge to tease him.

It hadn’t been long since he started having these mischievous feelings toward the kind and innocent Suhwan. No, thinking about it, he seemed to have feelings for him from the beginning. From the moment Suhwan began appearing before him without any awareness.

“…I want to kiss you again.”

Blurting out his inner thoughts without any intention of hiding them, Seunghyun licked his lips, recalling the sweet taste he had experienced. That boy who frequently ate sweets had sweet lips and even sweet breath. A subtle powdery scent that usually emanated from children lingered around Seunghyun’s nose. Although he had kissed him twice yesterday, Seunghyun’s desire remained completely unsatisfied. Rather, it made him want more, leaving his body quite heated.

“But why isn’t he coming?”

Feeling somewhat anxious, Seunghyun detached himself from the windowsill he had been leaning against and wandered around the classroom. The time when Suhwan should have arrived had long passed. Since this had never happened before, Seunghyun began to wonder.

Perhaps Suhwan didn’t share his feelings? He had been confident in the way the boy looked at him, but maybe it was just his imagination. What if he had no intention of becoming more than friends, yet Seunghyun had pushed things…

“Damn it.”

Imagining the worst-case scenario, Seunghyun quietly cursed. His crumpled expression revealed undisguised anxiety.

But even if that were true, strangely, he didn’t feel like giving up on Suhwan. Somehow, he just wanted to stay by that boy’s side.

In the end, Suhwan didn’t come to the old school building that day. The next day, Seunghyun realized it was his turn to find him.

“…Was it Class 10?”

Seunghyun murmured softly, recalling which class Suhwan was in. Like a sparrow, Suhwan would constantly chatter about his class, his locker number, his friends’ names, and even stories about them without stopping. Classes 3 and 10 were on different floors, so there was a high possibility of missing each other after classes ended. So he had no choice but to meet during break time to set up a later meeting. He had tried texting the day before, but there was still no reply from Suhwan.

Surely he wasn’t really trying to cut off their relationship? Seunghyun stood before Class 10 with a hardened face. He grabbed a male student coming out of the door and abruptly asked.

“Can you call Suhwan for me?”

“Huh? Suhwan?”

The boy looked puzzled as if hearing an unfamiliar name, then noticed Seunghyun and shut his mouth in surprise. Seunghyun frowned slightly and asked again.

“Is Suhwan not here right now?”

“Ah… um… well.”

“Suhwan. Jin Suhwan.”

“Jin… Suhwan?”

“You don’t know someone in your own class?”

“…?”

Facing the boy with whom communication seemed impossible, Seunghyun let out a deep sigh. Just as he was thinking he should ask another student, a familiar face passed by.

“Hey, you!”

“Yes?”

Although they rarely encountered each other at school since they were on different floors, this was one of the students Seunghyun occasionally saw in Suhwan’s group from a distance. Seunghyun approached him.

“You’re Suhwan’s friend, right?”

“What? Me?”

“Yes.”

“Um… but whose friend are you talking about?”

“Suhwan, Jin Suhwan.”

“Who’s that?”

“What?”

Are they playing games with me now? Seunghyun’s fine brow creased harshly.

They weren’t mother birds protecting their chicks, so were they brazenly pretending not to know in order to shield Suhwan from him? Just as Seunghyun was about to speak again with an angry face—

Thump.

“Ugh…!”

A headache struck as if he’d been hit with a hammer. As Seunghyun staggered and clutched his head, the boy in front of him opened his eyes wide. It was already confusing enough that someone had suddenly appeared asking about a person he didn’t know, and now this strange behavior.

“Hey, are you alright…?”

“No… don’t take him away, no…”

It was a terrible feeling. Something was erasing all traces of someone, like using an eraser. Seunghyun muttered frantically, trying to recall the face of someone who was fading away.

“Don’t do this, please… He’s all I have, please…”

Tears fell from his widely opened eyes. Now Seunghyun couldn’t even remember that boy’s name.

“Aah, aaahh…”

A sound like an animal’s howl escaped from Seunghyun’s lips.