“It’s already been five days?”
The link between Biendeoé and Mak Slechth was still faint, but Divine Power had recovered—albeit slower than expected. Instead of a hospital, the place where he’d slept for five days was a penthouse.
He was on high-nutrition IV fluids, so while his energy was a bit low, his overall condition wasn’t bad. No surprise quests had popped up while he was unconscious, and the Earth hadn’t ended either.
“They said you were recovering well, so I brought you home. I figured you’d be more comfortable here. But, uh, that bird’s still asleep. Is that okay?”
“She needs to recover using Divine Power purified through me. It’s going to take a bit longer.”
Kim Sibaek gently stroked Biendeoé’s tiny Incarnate Body, small enough to fit in his palm, while shaking off Tae Woon’s hand with his other arm.
“How long are you planning to hold my hand?”
“I’m just surprised my hand’s gotten bigger than yours.”
“Yeah. Your hands really did grow a lot.”
“Other things got bigger too.”
“Like what? Your feet?”
Without thinking, Kim Sibaek replied, recalling how Tae Woon’s shoes were noticeably larger than his own sneakers.
“My cock.”
“…What?”
“My cock.”
“…….”
He hadn’t misheard. Kim Sibaek blinked in stunned silence before forcing his voice out.
“Woonie… you shouldn’t use that kind of language…”
“Then what should I call it? Penis?”
“That’s still vulgar…”
Hearing words like cock and penis coming from the mouth of the adorable little brother who once looked like he’d never even hit puberty—Kim Sibaek was thrown into crisis.
Objectively speaking, Tae Woon was an adult. Thirty-five wasn’t exactly a child.
As he said, not just his hands—he was taller, broader in the shoulders, thick-chested, and built like a finely tuned machine. His voice was a deep, resonant baritone. No matter how biased Kim Sibaek’s eyes were, he couldn’t deny Tae Woon was a fully grown, strapping man.
But recognizing that Tae Woon was an adult and hearing those kinds of words from him were two completely different things. My Woonie doesn’t say stuff like that.
“…Pecker?”
“Pecker doesn’t feel right. That size deserves more respect.”
“Then… your reproductive organ, for future generations?”
“I’m not planning to have kids, so let’s just call it a sperm-ejection organ.”
That didn’t sound right either—but compared to dick or cock, it was the lesser evil. Kim Sibaek nodded.
“Anyway, it’s not just my hands. My sperm-ejection organ’s gotten way bigger too. Even if you used both hands, you probably wouldn’t be able to wrap around it.”
“Why would I be wrapping my hands around that?”
“Because I’m delicate, hyung.”
…said the man whose build rivaled a refrigerator, in a calm, low voice.
“Well, that’s true.”
Kim Sibaek responded naturally.
“Remember back in the day? I fainted once at the bathhouse.”
“When you and Minhyung were betting on who could last longer in hot water?”
“My body hasn’t changed much since then. So if we go to the bathhouse and I pass out from the heat again, you’d have to dress me, right?”
“Right.”
“And if you’re putting on my underwear, wouldn’t you end up touching my sperm-ejection organ?”
“I could just cover you with a towel until you wake up.”
“What if I catch a cold?”
“Oh no, that would be awful.”
Considering how frail he already was, a cold would be disastrous. Still holding Kim Sibaek’s hand, Tae Woon gently rubbed his palm and smiled innocently.
“That’s why I really want you to help me with my underwear.”
“But the bathtub here is massive. Do we really need to go to a bathhouse?”
“……”
With his plan completely shut down, Tae Woon fell silent. Kim Sibaek replied casually.
“And it’s not like we haven’t bathed together before…”
Back when he was five, Tae Woon had been covered in bruises, scabs, and filth—not even able to wash his own face. Kim Sibaek was the first to ever bathe him. …And now he’d grown that much? So much that even two hands wouldn’t be enough?
Kim Sibaek’s gaze involuntarily drifted downward—toward a certain part of Tae Woon, who was seated next to the bed.
Tae Woon’s shoulders twitched slightly as he sensed Young’s skeptical gaze.
[How was your time on Earth after returning?]
A system window suddenly popped up—as if it had been waiting for him to regain consciousness. He didn’t exactly feel glad to see it again after so long, but its appearance was oddly reassuring.
[Stopping the destruction of an Earth where no one remembers you as a Returnee… Honestly, you’re not too eager about that, are you? I totally get it (ಡ ̯ ಡ). But hey, what can you do? Earth really is doomed. If you diligently complete your quests, you’ll probably get to return to Mak Slechth. So instead of focusing on saving Earth, feel free to make that your goal instead.]
[With that said, your real quest officially begins now.]
***
Pi Minhyung was strolling casually through the hallway, a box of macarons in one hand, when he spotted Seo Gaeun and waved.
“Oh hey, Seo Gaeun. You off to see Tae too?”
“I was worried his mentor might not have woken up yet. Is that a gift for the hospital visit?”
“Macarons. Middle-aged guys secretly go nuts for sweets, you know.”
“Coming from a middle-aged guy, that’s a convincing claim.”
“Hey. Since when is thirty-something considered middle-aged?”
“If you’ve got a kid, then yeah, you’re middle-aged.”
“…Can’t really argue with that.”
Pi Minhyung nodded with mock seriousness.
“Tae Woon doesn’t like sweets anyway, so I figured I’d eat them before hyung wakes up.”
“I don’t care if he steals food—as long as Tae Woon-oppa eats something real instead of just energy bars.”
“True that.”
The two chatted as they headed toward the private elevator that led to the penthouse. The elevator connected directly to the front door, so they pressed the call button and waited—but it didn’t budge.
“Huh? Not home? He didn’t go to work today either.”
Pi Minhyung tilted his head and tried calling, but there was no answer. Just as he was about to give up and hand out the macarons to the team instead, Seo Gaeun spoke up.
“Found him. Tae Woon-oppa’s at the café on the first floor.”
“What? How’d you know?”
She showed him her phone screen—an anonymous post from the guild intranet message board.
[At long last, His Royal Puppiness has descended. Oh, I mean our house pup, Your Honor.]
“When the coffee’s ready, this buzzer goes off?”
“It vibrates pretty hard.”
Curious, he kept fiddling with the buzzer—until it suddenly started rattling and crawling across the table. Startled, he let go. Tae Woon picked it up with a smile.
“I’ll go get it.”
“Sure it’s not too heavy?”
“I’ll be taking care of someone about to turn a hundred soon. I need to get used to this.”
“…Could you just say forty-nine instead?”
“Come on, hyung. That’s shameless. You can’t shave off half a century.”
“……”
Was it just his imagination, or was Tae Woon actually having fun teasing him about his age?
After Tae Woon walked off, Kim Sibaek sat alone at the table and glanced around. Several people at nearby tables who’d been sneaking peeks at him flinched, quickly averting their eyes or burying their faces in their phones.
Still, since this café was inside the guild headquarters, most of the patrons were guild members. Unlike the department store incident, no one was blatantly taking pictures.
People sure stare at their phones a lot. Do they really have that many messages to send?
Watching them tap furiously with both thumbs, Kim Sibaek found it oddly fascinating. He had no idea that the anonymous message board and group chats had been blowing up ever since he and Tae Woon entered the café.
“Hyung.”
Tae Woon returned carrying a tray. It looked heavy, so Kim Sibaek quickly stood up, took it from him, and set it on the table. He then laid Biendeoé gently on a chair, cushioning her with a small towel and handkerchief he’d brought along.
Their order included two coffees and a loaded brunch plate: rye bread, salad, bacon, mushrooms, and more.
“You’ve had an empty stomach for days. Are you sure greasy food’s okay?”
“I once ate meat after fasting ten days. I’ll survive.”
Not knowing which coffee Kim Sibaek would prefer, Tae Woon had ordered both an Americano and a caramel macchiato. Kim Sibaek took a sip of the macchiato first—and winced involuntarily. It was sweet. Painfully sweet.
“I don’t even mind sweet stuff, but this is ridiculous.”
“Then have the Americano instead.”
“It’s not just the coffee. Everything tastes sweeter these days. Not sure if it’s me or if the food’s changed, but it’s intense.”
“Maybe it’s just the trend. Bold flavors are popular now.”
“And you’re okay with drinking something this sweet?”
Back in the day, Tae Woon had a bit of a sweet tooth, but people’s tastes often changed as they grew older. If he couldn’t handle it anymore, Kim Sibaek planned to offer him the Americano. But instead, Tae Woon leaned on one hand and smiled with soft eyes.
“Woonie still has a baby palate.”
