Cha Jae-woo, seemingly dumbfounded by the words suddenly thrown at him, didn’t offer any response.
His hands trembled uncontrollably, even though it wasn’t cold. Would showing this pitiful state earn him even a sliver of sympathy? He hesitated for a moment but decided it would likely be meaningless.
Should he beg for forgiveness? Promise never to do it again? Yet, would words like that even work?
“You’re no different from them… aren’t you?”
While he fidgeted nervously, unsure of what to do, Cha Jae-woo finally opened his mouth. And Lim Haeyul instantly understood what he meant. It was the message he had left for Cha Jae-woo just a few hours ago, after all.
Back then, he had been confident he wouldn’t run into Cha Jae-woo for a while. He had even thrown away his phone, which seemed to be a means of tracking his location. Yet he hadn’t anticipated Lee Jae-hoon showing up. How had he found him? Perhaps the mistake was calling Kim Sol.
Either way, it didn’t matter now. The real issue was figuring out how to explain himself to the Cha Jae-woo standing right in front of him.
“…I’m sorry.”
Of course, there was no real excuse to offer. It was far too late to claim he hadn’t meant it that way, or that he truly believed Cha Jae-woo was different from the others. Even if he said it, there was no way Cha Jae-woo would believe him.
“You think I’m going to kill you?”
Cha Jae-woo suddenly closed the distance between them. Lim Haeyul, already shriveled with fear, shrank back even further. At a loss for words, he hesitated before slowly shaking his head.
“N-no, y-you wouldn’t… r-right…?”
Cha Jae-woo had brought him here because he needed him. Therefore, he wouldn’t kill him. At least, not yet. But once he became useless…
Cha Jae-woo neither affirmed nor denied it. Lim Haeyul felt as if his blood were draining away. Perhaps Cha Jae-woo was calculating whether there was still any use in keeping him alive. If so, wouldn’t it be better to quickly explain why he was indispensable?
The thought was there, but he couldn’t bring himself to speak. It was even harder now than when he first met Cha Jae-woo.
There had been days when he and Cha Jae-woo would lie around, laughing and giggling together. Remembering those moments made a dull ache bloom in his chest.
What an idiot.
Why was he even thinking about that now? There would be no more moments like that. He himself could no longer accept those times as something to be happy about.
“Thanks to you, it all ended so pathetically.”
After a long silence, Cha Jae-woo finally spoke. His voice was dry and flat, but there was an unmistakable undercurrent of reproach.
“Without losing anything, I got to die comfortably inside the gate.”
Lim Haeyul swallowed hard. He had suspected that others were also shoved into the gate, but hearing confirmation struck terror deep into his bones.
“And that’s why I’m angry…”
For a moment, Lim Haeyul’s heart plummeted.
“I’m sorry.”
He quickly bowed his head.
“I’m sorry. I’ll behave from now on. I-I won’t do anything. I won’t look, I won’t listen to anything…”
Cha Jae-woo’s targets were Jang Gijun and Jo Gyeong-hoon. He had told Lim Haeyul he would ruin their reputations before killing them.
So Lim Haeyul understood, at least rationally, what Cha Jae-woo meant. Even if it was strange to talk about feeling empty after someone had already died, it wasn’t something he should question. Whether he understood it or not, he had to accept it—especially if he valued his life, which, compared to theirs, was worth less than a fly’s.
“Only after they’re dead, huh?”
Cha Jae-woo let out a hollow laugh, as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Normally, Lim Haeyul liked seeing him smile, but right now, it was terrifying. He figured it would probably stay that way from now on. That thought made his chest ache miserably, completely ignoring the situation.
Why couldn’t emotions ever follow reason? He tried to calm himself by letting out a long, slow breath.
Sooner or later, he’d have to accept that Cha Jae-woo was not someone he should love. That Cha Jae-woo would never love him back. Once he fully understood that, these feelings would disappear too. Until then, he needed to keep a firm grip on himself, not letting emotions take over.
“And how exactly am I supposed to trust you?”
Cha Jae-woo’s fingertips lifted Lim Haeyul’s chin, as if urging him to answer. Though there was no force behind the touch, Haeyul obediently tilted his head up without the slightest resistance, and soon, he was staring into pitch-black eyes. Eyes so inscrutable, so impossible to read, that his entire body tensed instinctively.
“Hypnosis doesn’t work on you, after all.”
If only Cha Jae-woo’s ability had worked on him. Then he could have lived quietly, peacefully, in that flower garden. He would have been discarded once he was no longer needed, sure—but at least he wouldn’t have to fear for his life.
He didn’t know. He didn’t know anything about Cha Jae-woo. That’s why no matter what assumptions he made, he could never predict how Cha Jae-woo would act.
“D-do you not… need Guiding? Um, you seemed like… you used your abilities a lot today…”
Instead of getting caught up in useless thoughts, it was better to prove himself as a valuable asset. And he had to keep his mouth shut about any other Guides. He had been too complacent all this time. He thought he would simply be discarded once he lost his usefulness—and that thought alone had been painful. But that was back when both his mind and heart were still intact.
“I thought you’d have a lot of questions.”
But his attempt to steer the conversation toward Guiding quickly fell flat. Lim Haeyul watched Cha Jae-woo’s face carefully. Of course, if facing him weren’t so terrifying, he had a mountain of things he wanted to ask.
What had happened? Surely they hadn’t lured Cha Jae-woo into the Gate with just blind trust—so why had it ended so easily? What were they planning? How had Cha Jae-woo handled it?
But he couldn’t open his mouth. He was afraid that if he spoke, his words would be twisted, making it seem like he was dissatisfied with how Cha Jae-woo had dealt with them.
“I-it’s fine. Mr. Cha Jae-woo… you’re strong… so, um, that’s why the situation was resolved…”
Besides, he didn’t want to hear the details. He was already terrified enough; if he knew exactly how things unfolded, Cha Jae-woo would feel even more overwhelming.
“You’re the only one my mental abilities don’t affect.”
Yet, as always, Cha Jae-woo didn’t spare him. Normally, he wouldn’t bother answering any questions, but today, he spoke at length, as if deliberately showing just how far his power could reach. Cold sweat trickled down Haeyul’s back.
“They all walked into the Gate on their own.”
“…”
“They probably meant to send me in. Unlike you, my mind can be manipulated by psychic abilities. Once inside, I would’ve been helpless—left to die without lifting a finger.”
Lim Haeyul had suspected that Jo Gyeong-hoon would target Cha Jae-woo’s life, but hearing it confirmed made his blood run cold. It hit him just how completely different a world they lived in.
Why were they so desperate to kill each other? Why push themselves into a situation where survival meant having to kill someone else?
“They didn’t expect me to take control of their minds first.”
“…”
“They didn’t see that coming at all.”
“…”
“Tough luck for you, huh.”
Cha Jae-woo smirked, his words poking sharply at Haeyul’s guilty conscience. Haeyul frantically shook his head.
“N-no, it’s not like that! It’s not that I’m disappointed, or anything…!”
He was simply overwhelmed, unable to grasp that people had died. It wasn’t regret that Cha Jae-woo had survived. Of that, he was certain.
“I just… I was worried about Sol-hyung. That’s why. That’s why I went. I felt like I had to…”
“And me? You didn’t care what happened to me?”
There was a thorn in Cha Jae-woo’s question. Haeyul couldn’t immediately shake his head. It wasn’t that he didn’t care. It was more that he hadn’t thought about it at all.
Not because his feelings for Cha Jae-woo were shallow—but because, somewhere deep down, he had believed Cha Jae-woo would be fine. He was certain Cha Jae-woo wasn’t the type to throw himself into danger recklessly.
“I just… I just didn’t want anyone to get hurt. Mr. Cha Jae-woo… you’re strong. So…”
But killing Kim Sol would have been too easy for those people. And yet, there was no one to protect him. That’s why Lim Haeyul had stepped in. Even if he didn’t have any power either, he couldn’t just stand by and pretend he didn’t see.
“I won’t do it again…”
His voice came out small and feeble. Could he really promise that? Honestly, he didn’t know. He just hoped that situations like this would never happen again.
“…”
After hesitating for a long while, he carefully reached out to Cha Jae-woo. The man who had been staring at him intently soon extended his hand without resistance. Cha Jae-woo’s gaze on his trembling fingertips felt unbearably intense.
With difficulty, Haeyul wrapped his hand around Cha Jae-woo’s, which felt cold as ice. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly. He just wanted to finish the Guiding quickly and be alone. Maybe then he could breathe a little easier.
His face twisted in pain, and every inch of his skin prickled. Today, more than ever, the mana that should have been flowing naturally toward Cha Jae-woo refused to move.
