“He’s safe.”
“Haah…. Why did you keep me in suspense!”
For a brief moment, the sweat that had gathered on my palm felt like it would drip off. I shuddered in shock.
‘There’s no way he could be in bad shape.’
The memory of seeing Cha Jae-woo that day was vivid, so why was I worried? It seemed Cha Jae-woo just wanted to tease me.
“Don’t joke about things like that….”
Even if it was a joke, you shouldn’t joke about someone’s life. My heart was pounding. I thought I should contact Kim Geon-ung as soon as I got back to my room, and I let out a small sigh.
“Except for one person.”
Cha Jae-woo added casually.
I was still sitting on the sofa, unable to get up, when his unexpected words made me frown and look at him. His eyes were still dull and sunken.
“Except for one person?”
“Yes.”
“Who?”
“The Esper you were holding.”
Jung Hyun-soo.
As soon as Cha Jae-woo finished speaking, her name and face came to mind.
I don’t know her well. I don’t think she’s from our department, and from what I’ve seen, she seems to be part of a group, so I thought she might be taking a double major or minor with her friends. Even that was just a guess based on Kim Geon-ung’s chatter. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have even known she existed.
But we were both pulled into the gate, and I saw her rampaging. And I guided her.
Even if that weren’t the case, even if she were a complete stranger, the fact that someone wasn’t okay would have bothered me. But despite my best efforts to guide her, she still wasn’t okay.
“What’s wrong with her? Did something happen because of the guiding? Oh, she seemed to be in a lot of pain… But she looked like she was getting better.”
My voice grew louder as I felt a sense of urgency. Cha Jae-woo just listened to my question without responding. He didn’t answer for a long time, which was frustrating.
“Why won’t you tell me? Did she… die or something? Or is she badly injured?”
“….Yes.”
“Haah….”
A heavy sigh escaped me at Cha Jae-woo’s brief response.
She didn’t die. So, she’s badly injured? But why? I clearly remember her letting go of his consciousness when he saw Cha Jae-woo coming. Everything should have been fine once Cha Jae-woo arrived…
“Why… did she get hurt?”
My thoughts were a jumbled mess. After a long hesitation, I asked Cha Jae-woo. Unfortunately, the only answer I could think of was not comforting.
“Because I made her that way.”
Cha Jae-woo attacked her.
Slimes are generally considered low-level monsters. They might easily overwhelm ordinary people like us, but for an Esper, especially Cha Jae-woo, they could be killed with a simple stomp.
Other Espers aren’t much different. Since slimes are commonly found in the easiest gates, even F-rank Espers can handle them without much trouble.
So, even without knowing Jung Hyun-soo’s rank, it’s reasonable to assume she wouldn’t have been harmed by a slime.
If she was injured, the only one who could have attacked a rampaging Esper at that time was Cha Jae-woo.
“….Why did you do that?”
My voice was a bit subdued, but I believed Cha Jae-woo must have had a good reason.
No, I wanted to believe that. It couldn’t be for no reason. I had faith that Cha Jae-woo had a reason for attacking another Esper in the gate. Of course, at first, I didn’t think so, but the more time I spent with Cha Jae-woo, the more I believed he wouldn’t do something without a good reason.
It wasn’t because I was blinded by affection, but because Cha Jae-woo didn’t seem like the type to cause trouble for no reason. If he did something, there had to be a reason behind it. So, there must have been a reason why he attacked Jung Hyun-soo.
“I had to.”
But Cha Jae-woo didn’t give me a clear answer.
His mouth was shut tight, as if glued. The silence wasn’t because I had no questions, but because I had too many. I couldn’t decide what to ask first.
What did he mean by “I had to”? How badly was Jung Hyun-soo injured? Was her life in danger? Did Cha Jae-woo attack anyone else? Did his actions have any meaning, or did he just do it because he wanted to?
My trust in him, which I thought was solid, began to waver. I tried to think of what to say, but I couldn’t come up with anything.
“When an Esper’s abilities manifest and they go berserk, something always happens simultaneously.”
Cha Jae-woo broke the heavy silence first.
“A gate appears beneath them.”
I unconsciously furrowed my brow. So, the gate that appeared beneath our building…
“….Did the gate appear because Jung Hyun-soo’s abilities manifested, and we got sucked into it?”
“Yes.”
I nodded, feeling dazed. I had thought the gate’s appearance was unpredictable, not a result of an Esper’s manifestation.
“People think gates suddenly appear out of nowhere, but unpredicted gates are actually created by an Esper’s manifestation. It’s not a coincidence. The energy released when an Esper goes berserk creates a rift, and a gate appears beneath it.”
“….Ah.”
“So, the appearance of an unpredicted gate means a new Esper has emerged.”
It was an interesting fact, but I couldn’t focus. Under normal circumstances, I would have found it fascinating, but right now, I was more concerned about what happened to Jung Hyun-soo and why Cha Jae-woo injured her.
“Ultimately, that gate is the first obstacle a newly manifested Esper must overcome.”
“…..”
“You interfered with that.”
“No.”
I immediately denied it. Even though I rarely contradicted him like this, Cha Jae-woo remained calm, as if he had expected my reaction.
“If I hadn’t, the monsters wouldn’t have killed us first. If Jung Hyun-soo had continued to rampage in a situation where we couldn’t escape, we all would have died.”
“You might think so. But there was an easier way.”
His voice was cold. I struggled to find words and just stared at him. He looked me straight in the eye and continued.
“You should have let her see the slime first.”
“…..”
“You could have thrown her out of the building.”
I couldn’t believe it. Both Kim Geon-ung and I had considered it, but I never thought Cha Jae-woo would actually suggest it. I immediately shook my head.
“She wasn’t fully awakened. She was on the verge of going berserk.”
“You couldn’t have thrown her out after he went berserk. So, you should have done it before.”
“How could you say that? Do Espers survive being thrown into a horde of monsters? Are you sure about that?”
I knew my tone was sharp, but I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t agree with what Cha Jae-woo was saying.
“That’s how all Espers manifest.”
“Cha Jae-woo.”
“So, I threw her.”
“….What?”
“I threw her into the monster horde.”
I was speechless. My mouth hung open, but no words came out. Cha Jae-woo, however, looked indifferent, as if he had said something trivial.
He spoke again. I didn’t want to hear it, but my stiff lips couldn’t stop his words.
“That’s how she got injured. If you hadn’t guided her, she might have been less injured.”
“…..”
“Of course, there was also a chance she could have died if you hadn’t guided her.”
I couldn’t take it anymore. I stood up abruptly. My legs ached from the sudden movement, but I didn’t care. I just wanted to get out of there.
My disappointment in Cha Jae-woo surged to an indescribable level. I couldn’t bear to look at his face and lowered my gaze.
“….I’m leaving now.”
“Everyone goes through the same thing.”
“I don’t want to hear it. Just stop talking.”
I hurriedly looked for my crutch. But Cha Jae-woo continued speaking, undeterred.
“All Espers go berserk like that. Then, after some time, other Espers enter and drag them out, unconscious. That’s the process. That’s what should have happened to her. She shouldn’t have walked out stable because of your guiding.”
“Cha Jae-woo!”
“An Esper who has gone berserk walking out of a gate unharmed is unheard of. Eventually, people will realize something happened inside.”
“So…!”
“Her energy should have been unstable, and she should have been injured. That way, no one would know what you did.”
His flat tone sounded incredibly cruel to me. I couldn’t agree with anything he was saying.
“It would have been better if they found out.”
“No, they can’t find out.”
“You said she could have died! Is hiding this more important than someone’s life?”
My raised voice made Cha Jae-woo smirk. His expression was unreadable.
“Yes.”
I felt sick to my stomach, like I was going to vomit. I thought he was a good person, but I was completely wrong. It was all my mistake.
“Jung Hyun-soo thinks she attacked you and jumped out of the building herself. Everyone else there thinks the same. Their memories were altered.”
“…..”
“So, you should know too. Don’t cause any confusion by saying unnecessary things.”
Is this why Cha Jae-woo stopped me? I stood up and grabbed my crutch, then headed straight for the door.
“….I wish”
As I opened the door, I finally spoke, still not looking at him.
“…you had lied to me too. You should have told me the same lie. That Jung Hyun-soo jumped out of the building on her own.”
Why did I have to know the truth about what Cha Jae-woo did? It would have been better if I didn’t know.
I couldn’t bear to look at Cha Jae-woo’s face. My chest ached from the damn side effects, but I found him repulsive. Conflicting emotions kept clashing within me.
“There’s no guarantee the same thing won’t happen again.”
But Cha Jae-woo responded coldly, as if my feelings didn’t matter.
“So, you’re telling me the truth about that situation so that if it happens again, I won’t hesitate to throw a manifesting Esper to the monsters?”
My voice dripped with sarcasm.
“No. I’ll do the same thing.”
“…..”
“Whether I get caught or not, I don’t care.”
“…..”
“I can’t trust you, Cha Jae-woo. Are you really keeping this a secret because it’s dangerous for me? Or is it for your own sake?”
How could I be sure it wasn’t the latter? There was always the possibility that he was using me for his own benefit.
“….You’re not even defending yourself.”
With that, silence filled the room for a while, broken only by the sound of my uneven footsteps. There was no reason to stay and face Cha Jae-woo, who seemed to have no intention of denying my words.
In the first place, hoping for him to deny it was foolish. Even that hope stemmed from a lingering expectation, a remnant of the feelings I had for him.
Damn feelings.
Could I make them all disappear?
My steps away from Cha Jae-woo’s room were painfully slow. But he never called me back.
