#085
Just before the last remnant of sensation disappeared, something suddenly flowed into his body.
“Hugh…!”
He expelled the suppressed breath. Simultaneously, all sensations rushed in at once, as if hit by water.
His body jerked and convulsed at the sudden flood of stimuli. His limbs fluttered as if someone was shaking him from within.
Yeon Tae-soo pressed down on his convulsing body. Sight, hearing, and touch returned. A violent shock followed that felt both like his blood was freezing and boiling.
“Seong-woo.”
Yoo Seong-woo could hear Yeon Tae-soo speaking as he mounted and pressed down on his body. His expression was now clearly visible. He was smiling as if crying.
“My desire to live with you is still valid.”
Looking down at him as he gasped for breath, Yeon Tae-soo said this.
That the promise was still valid. That he wanted to live with a broken machine that had deceived him.
Yeon Tae-soo embraced him, and Yoo Seong-woo’s eyes stung dryly. He moved his hand, which hadn’t yet regained its strength, just enough to grip his collar.
It was hard to believe. Despite seeing him like this, he was still holding him.
‘Why…’
Why don’t you punish me? Why aren’t you angry? He wanted to ask, but his voice still wouldn’t come out.
He could fully feel him inhaling and exhaling, that rough breathing. He could feel the heartbeat through their touching chests. The only part similar to himself was beating violently. As if calling out to Yoo Seong-woo.
He should be using his last strength to push him away and escape. Yet why was he just lying in this warm embrace? Why did he keep trying to overlap his body with his, seeking his warmth, burrowing into his chest?
Why did he crave his love?
In the midst of the most brilliant error he had ever experienced, he closed his eyes. Yeon Tae-soo’s warmth pressed down on him affectionately. As if to embrace whatever kept bursting inside him.
***
Yoo Seong-woo, who had briefly regained consciousness, fell asleep again as if fainting.
Old Man Chang was quite skilled. He was capable of handling high-end humanoid androids. Even in a state of shock, he skillfully administered injections and monitored Yoo Seong-woo’s condition.
When he injected medicine into the rigid Yoo Seong-woo, he moved briefly, but Old Man Chang said this was just a temporary measure.
Even as Old Man Chang laid Yoo Seong-woo on what resembled a makeshift operating table and examined his brain and heart with some device, Yeon Tae-soo couldn’t let go of Yoo Seong-woo’s hand.
Finally, Old Man Chang put down his tools with a grim expression, making Yeon Tae-soo dread what he was about to say. The words that Old Man Chang carefully uttered with a devastated expression were, as expected, not welcome news.
“…To be honest, this is beyond what I can handle.”
He went on to explain that there were very few people in the country who could handle such high-end androids.
Moreover, from what he observed, even if they found someone who could handle it, his condition seemed too poor for any intervention to work.
With technology being so advanced these days, it was incomprehensible that he couldn’t be fixed. When his expression remained frozen, Old Man Chang added an explanation.
“Androids are consumables too. When they break, parts need to be replaced. Even the microchips embedded in the brain and heart are replaced when damaged. But…”
Old Man Chang shook his head. His aged face was filled with regret.
“I’ve never seen anything like this. It seems the microchip is the problem… but this is too different from ordinary humanoid androids…”
“The microchip is the problem? If we change it, will he get better?”
Even as he spoke, Yeon Tae-soo couldn’t believe it. He was asking in a half-dazed state. To find a way to save the being known as Yoo Seong-woo. Whether android or human. Because he needed to save ‘Yoo Seong-woo’.
“It’s already decaying while attached to the heart and brain. I’m not sure if it can be removed, and even if it could be, it would need to be replaced with the same type, but I’ve never seen such microchips before.”
Old Man Chang took out his tablet and displayed a photo. He said it was a picture of Yoo Seong-woo’s heart that he had just taken.
The semi-transparent 3D heart shape floating there looked familiar somehow. Yes, it resembled Yeon Tae-soo’s heart after his adoptive father had carelessly opened his body and operated on him as a child.
“The chips… they look like unfinished pieces stuck all over, and they’ve already been fused with the heart and brain for too long… It wouldn’t be surprising if they stopped functioning completely at any moment.”
Old Man Chang’s words came to him intermittently. As he said, there was something alien attached to the heart, something Yeon Tae-soo didn’t have, discolored in patches. Even someone with no medical knowledge would find it strange.
“He must have been in a lot of pain.”
Old Man Chang clicked his tongue as he spoke with a voice mixed with sighs. He also lamented, “To think Teacher Yoo was an android…”
Yeon Tae-soo still couldn’t believe it. His mind couldn’t accept the fact that Yoo Seong-woo was not the being he had known.
He just felt devastated. That he had been in pain.
You were always in pain by my side. And I didn’t know.
Even after Old Man Chang left, he sat by the bed for a long time, holding Yoo Seong-woo’s hand.
He hoped he would open his eyes soon. So that he could beg for forgiveness.
Although his mind still couldn’t accept it, he wasn’t so stupid as to not know his own sin. How many times had he uttered hurtful words in front of him?
“Seong-woo.”
This name is probably not real either. Because androids don’t have names. But what does it matter?
“Let’s wake up first. Wake up and…”
Wake up and look at me, won’t you?
Old Man Chang had said he was in a state where his “operation could cease” at any moment. The man who just last night had looked at him with bright eyes, smiled, folded roses, demanded why he wasn’t getting under the blanket, and leaned into his embrace, was now lying as if dead.
Over and over, he placed his fingertips on his nose. And he was relieved by the single fact that he was still breathing like a human.
“Seong-woo.”
It doesn’t matter if this name is fake. It doesn’t matter what you… are.
He just wished for Yoo Seong-woo to open his eyes and look at him.
***
It felt like he had briefly closed his eyes and opened them again, but he experienced muscle pain similar to waking up after a long sleep.
Yoo Seong-woo blinked several times. There were no warning messages on his visual display. He could hear his own breathing in his ears. He moved his hands and feet to confirm that his sense of touch and nervous system were also normal.
So I survived again. But he felt no relief. Because he remembered what had happened just before he lost consciousness.
He was lying in a place different from the guest room that Old Man Chang had provided. His body was on a bed, and nearby were tools presumed to be Old Man Chang’s. They were tools used to repair humanoid androids.
Just as he was sitting up, the door opened and Yeon Tae-soo appeared.
Flinch.
He instinctively shrank his shoulders and avoided eye contact. He couldn’t brazenly face someone he had deceived with lies all this time.
Now he has discovered that I am the kind he so despises. I have deceived him until now. So naturally, there would be consequences and punishment for that.
Yeon Tae-soo didn’t immediately enter but stood at the doorway. He stood as if frozen, seeming to hesitate whether to come in or not. Probably due to aversion.
He understood. Humans often feel aversion towards other species that mimic them. Even if they are beings they created themselves.
“How’s your body…”
Yeon Tae-soo, who had spoken in a cracked voice, cleared his throat and then shut his mouth. It seemed as if he found the word “body” awkward. Since androids are usually referred to as “units.”
“How is your condition?”
As expected, he corrected himself and asked, and Yoo Seong-woo nodded vaguely.
“I’m fine. Nothing hurts…”
Should he mention that there were no warning messages on his visual display? Probably not. He already had enough aversion; such talk wasn’t necessary. So Yoo Seong-woo also left his sentence unfinished and closed his mouth.
Yeon Tae-soo came closer. One step at a time, slowly.
With each slow approach, Yoo Seong-woo trembled. Even if he tried not to, his body stiffened first. He clenched his fist with rigid hands. He bit his lip and lowered his gaze.
Fortunately or unfortunately, Yeon Tae-soo, who had been approaching, stopped in the middle of the room. In that state, he rubbed his face with his hands.
“Haa…”
His sigh was tinged with irritation. Does it mean he can’t stand the sight of him? That would be understandable. He had deceived him all this time.
His fingertips trembled. Fear rose like nausea. He would hate me. Dislike me. No, more than that, what he feared most was that he had been hurt.
How should I atone for the sin of deceiving you? As he trembled like that, Yeon Tae-soo approached him again. This time quickly, without slowing down.
As soon as his hand reached toward his face, what flashed through Yoo Seong-woo’s mind was the image of the security android who had died at Eden before.
The gunshot, the blood on the floor, and even the android’s corpse, mangled beyond recognition.
As soon as the memory surfaced, he almost reflexively shrank his body. At that, Yeon Tae-soo’s hand stopped abruptly in mid-air.
While he waited with his eyes tightly closed and holding his breath, there was no pain or pressure. But he couldn’t open his eyes.
“What should I do?”
What…? Not readily understanding his question, he gently opened his eyes. And their gazes met.
Yeon Tae-soo wore a shattered expression, as if stabbed by a knife.
“How do I fix you?”
First, Yoo Seong-woo was surprised at how heartbreaking the expression of someone who had been betrayed could be, and second, at the question he uttered.
Yoo Seong-woo’s lips moved before he opened his mouth.
“I can’t be fixed.”
Though he had just calmly stated a fact, somehow Yeon Tae-soo’s face stiffened again as if stabbed by something.
“I am a discarded item. I have been discarded even before I met you.”
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
