Chapter 17
“And Seoyul!”
“Yes, yes!”
Seoyul straightened his back in surprise at Sunjeong’s call. He looked determined to accept whatever scolding might come his way.
“Seoyul, it’s the same for you. If you don’t speak up, he won’t know. Dowoon will only know if you tell him when he’s making you uncomfortable.”
“Ah…”
Seoyul didn’t fully understand, but he was swept up by her forceful presence. As he rolled his eyes uncertainly, Sunjeong continued.
“Besides, you seem to be worrying about things you don’t need to worry about. You seem to attach great significance to words and actions that don’t really mean much.”
“Uh…”
That was true.
His face turned red, as if his innermost thoughts had been exposed. He didn’t think his worries were pointless, but it was true that he overthought everything and assigned meaning to every little thing.
“And you! Don’t just blurt out whatever comes to mind! Think a bit about how the other person might feel before you speak!”
“…”
Dowoon frowned at Sunjeong’s pointed remarks. Then he realized something.
Why hadn’t he thought of it before? Given Seoyul’s personality, his own blunt words and actions could have been making Seoyul uncomfortable.
“First of all, Seoyul!”
“Yes, yes!”
“Tell me what’s making you depressed right now.”
“What? R-right now?”
Seoyul hesitated in surprise. He hadn’t thought of putting it into words, so he was flustered.
“This is practice for expressing your emotions verbally. That way, you can also express happy emotions.”
It made sense. Seoyul wondered if he should really speak up, mulling it over dozens of times. He was afraid that if he spoke up like before, he might confirm an unwelcome truth.
“Hurry up.”
Under Sunjeong’s strict demeanor, he finally opened his mouth cautiously.
“W-well… I thought Esper-nim disliked the headband… that day… I think I was the only one having fun… and… I’m sorry for that…”
Though his voice was small, it was enough for the two to hear. Sunjeong nodded with satisfaction, while Dowoon was surprised.
To think he had been feeling down because of that.
“No, why are you worrying about that?”
“Pardon…?”
Seoyul raised his head in surprise, not understanding. Dowoon, with an incredibly bewildered expression, declared confidently:
“I’m the kind of person who doesn’t do anything at all if I really dislike it.”
That’s right. If he had truly disliked it, he wouldn’t have gone along with it at all. He did it because it was Seoyul.
Although… it seemed his discomfort had shown a little.
“R-really…?”
“Yes.”
At his firm answer, Seoyul stared at him blankly. Dowoon, seeming a bit embarrassed, cleared his throat softly and continued.
“Well… my face is just naturally like this, so you should try to understand… Ack!”
In the middle of speaking, Sunjeong’s sharp hand flew again. It must have hurt quite a bit this time, as Dowoon collapsed onto the desk and his hand trembled slightly.
“Not understanding, but effort! Effort!”
“Fine, I got it. I’ll try, so you should try too!”
Dowoon shouted loudly. His face was flushed with embarrassment, which somehow melted deep into Seoyul’s heart.
Seoyul felt like he had gained a little insight into relationships between people.
‘I need to… communicate.’
Dowoon hadn’t disliked it. Seoyul had just drawn that conclusion himself and was too scared, trying to avoid the issue.
Meanwhile, Dowoon hadn’t been thinking that way at all.
“Yes, I’ll try too.”
Seoyul smiled widely with relief. At that moment, a wave of hot energy poured out and rushed into Dowoon.
“Huh?”
“Huh?!!”
Both of them opened their eyes wide in surprise.
“J-just now!”
Seoyul was the most surprised. He had felt an enormous energy surge into Dowoon just moments ago.
“You, could it be!”
“Something… was different.”
The feeling was strange. The energy he normally possessed remained unchanged, but it had momentarily increased dramatically and surged out.
“Was that… S-class Guiding?”
Seoyul quietly looked down at his hands. They were trembling unsightly from the shock.
He tried to calm himself by clenching his fists tightly, but it didn’t work well. Just then, Dowoon grabbed his small hands firmly and shouted.
“It worked! Now there’s no probl—mmph!”
But Sunjeong immediately covered his mouth.
“You’re getting ahead of yourself again.”
“Ugh! What did I do?!”
Dowoon struggled free from her hand and shouted. Seoyul jumped in surprise again and bit his lip.
Dowoon realized his mistake but first glared at her for not letting him properly celebrate.
“Don’t glare at me like that.”
“Ah! Seriously!”
When she pushed his eyes back with her palm, Dowoon grimaced in annoyance. But Sunjeong spoke to Seoyul with an attitude completely opposite to how she treated Dowoon.
“Seoyul. Just keep doing that. Let’s take it one step at a time without rushing. First… Right! Shall we start by thinking about how to live happily?”
“Happily…?”
Seoyul stared at her blankly. She gently stroked his hair and said:
“Yes. Let’s just think about what you enjoy doing, what makes you happy, what you want to do right now.”
“Ah…”
It was perhaps an obvious statement. People naturally think about how to find enjoyment in life.
But it still sounded difficult to Seoyul, who looked at his hands quietly and thought.
‘Right. He didn’t dislike it.’
It was happiness hidden within relief. The small happiness brought by the sparkling memory of that day. That had amplified the energy.
If he had just kept his mouth shut, he might never have known. But his small action had allowed him to feel happiness, and to perform Guiding.
What mattered was how he thought and acted.
“I think… I understand. What Team Leader-nim is saying… and what I should do from now on.”
He needed to change. No, hadn’t he already made different choices from his past to obtain his present?
That alone was enough reason to discard the past and move forward anew.
He felt that if he continued to build his life anew, he would naturally find that sense.
‘And C-class Guiding is enough.’
The reason Seoyul had been impatient was because of the possibility that Dowoon might die in a year. But if he consistently provided Guiding, the probability of that happening was low.
After all, Dowoon had many strong supporters around him.
‘I don’t need to be anxious.’
With this realization, his mind felt clear. His body felt lighter, and it seemed like only good things would happen from now on.
“As expected, Seoyul is much more mature than Dowoon.”
“What? Oh, I wouldn’t go that far…”
Seoyul rolled his eyes in embarrassment. Dowoon was so dumbfounded that he couldn’t close his mouth. But he couldn’t immediately object either.
Even in his eyes, Seoyul was making progress little by little. He acknowledged his own shortcomings and was making new resolutions and moving forward.
‘What have I done in comparison?’
He repeatedly made mistakes, carried away by his emotions. He was hasty, rough, and impatient.
‘Damn it.’
Looking at Seoyul smiling brightly, Dowoon felt ashamed of himself for the first time.
* * *
After that day.
Seoyul decided to seriously think about what made him happiest. It was a difficult topic, so he wrote down each activity one by one to consider.
First, when the S-class Guiding leaked out.
It was when he went to restaurants with Dowoon and had fun at the amusement park. Seoyul thought he was happy because those were special experiences, but Sunjeong shook her head.
‘That’s just ordinary.’
Ordinary happiness.
While big happiness is still happiness, people find small joys in their everyday lives. The experiences Seoyul had with Dowoon were such things.
Eating delicious food, spending time in enjoyable places, finding happiness in relationships between people.
‘I’m too inexperienced.’
That was Seoyul’s conclusion. He was completely ignorant about these ordinary things. Having lived a life disconnected from the world for so long, he didn’t know where to begin.
What he needed was experience. It seemed like he needed to discover what he liked and disliked through various experiences.
“Alright!”
Seoyul suddenly felt confident. So he immediately went to the lab and told Sunjeong.
“You want to help with the work?”
“Yes! I don’t know if there’s anything I can do, but I want to help, even with small things.”
“Hmm…”
To think that the answer he found after much contemplation was to help her. Sunjeong didn’t know how to respond.
But his eyes were filled with strong conviction. It seemed like a conclusion he had reached after his own deliberation. She wanted to respect that.
“Yes, helping others is one form of happiness too.”
Some people find happiness that way. Given Seoyul’s personality, it seemed like it might be a good fit.
‘He’s such a good kid.’
The burden he had felt was probably because he wanted to be helpful but wasn’t able to do so well. So it seemed fine to let him start with what he could do, taking it slowly.
Moreover, the lab was always busy. Since Seoyul was quite capable, he could be very helpful with just a little guidance.
And that intuition proved correct.
“Seoyul.”
“Seoyul.”
People were looking for him everywhere. Since Seoyul did his work so well, many people started seeking him out.
And he enjoyed it so much. It was hard to understand what he found so enjoyable, but whenever he was given a task, he would enthusiastically work hard at it.
Seoyul absorbed in work was adorable, and he would spread his beautiful smile around at the slightest compliment of gratitude.
So everyone couldn’t help but like this adorable creature. Although, of course, they weren’t so fond of the extra that came along with him.
“…Would you mind leaving? You’re in the way.”
Sunjeong looked at Dowoon with narrowed eyes. He was stretched out like a piece of taffy on the sofa that was reserved for her precious naps.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
