#80
Bonoh kept glancing at Taeseong’s reactions. Fortunately, Taeseong didn’t shake off their clasped hands or show any signs of dislike, but he didn’t seem welcoming either.
I don’t look suspicious right now, do I? He worried that the sight of two men walking hand in hand might catch other people’s attention. Bonoh deliberately pressed his body close to Taeseong to hide their clasped hands.
Bonoh was on edge about various things. Then suddenly, he began to notice each person passing by. Could the “other person” Taeseong mentioned be somewhere around here? Bonoh started looking around, remembering Taeseong’s words.
The problem was that he didn’t know what kind of person Taeseong liked. He didn’t even know why Taeseong was dating him, what kind of person he liked, or even what gender he preferred. So he couldn’t narrow down the range of potential threats.
In that case… he had to suspect anyone around. Bonoh frantically scanned the crowd. Then his gaze stopped on a professor sipping coffee by the roadside while watching the festival. It was a general education professor whose scalp was clearly visible through his half-bald head.
Hmm… It seemed like that professor called Joo Taeseong’s name in a sticky way during attendance. It might have been his imagination, but it seemed like the professor’s gaze lingered on Taeseong just a bit longer than on other students after calling his name. Bonoh felt uncomfortable and unconsciously gripped Taeseong’s hand tighter.
Maybe Taeseong didn’t just dislike people, but specifically disliked his peers? Among those who approached Taeseong to ask for his number, there were some with flashy appearances. Yet Taeseong consistently showed his disgust without hiding it. Maybe he was the type who looked at intelligence rather than appearance?
Bonoh glanced suspiciously at the back of the professor’s head, then suddenly his heart sank when he saw someone passing by.
No, why is that person here?!
It was a part-time worker from the restaurant in front of school that he and Taeseong often went to. It seemed like the part-timer’s hand had slightly touched Taeseong’s whenever Taeseong handed over his card to pay. He’d thought nothing of it at the time, but now that he thought about it, it might have been intentional skinship.
Moreover, while Taeseong disliked people equally regardless of gender, he never acted prickly toward part-time workers or staff wherever he went. Could it be that Joo Taeseong had a weakness for uniforms? There were several people around Bonoh who had fantasies about maid outfits. He didn’t know if part-time work clothes counted as maid outfits, but wasn’t it the same thing?
Bonoh unconsciously sent a wary look toward the part-timer. He was already walking past and showing his back, but you never knew. He might be planning such chance encounters and approaching deliberately.
“What are you looking around for so much?”
Taeseong looked down at Bonoh as if finding it strange.
“Huh? Oh, just… there are so many people.”
Bonoh tried to smile nonchalantly and looked away. But he was still on guard. Whether it was professors, part-timers, or anyone who hung around Taeseong, he couldn’t let his guard down.
After being on guard all day, the sun had set before he knew it. He didn’t even know what state of mind he’d spent the time in. When night fell, the campus became even more chaotic. Most students had finished classes and flocked to the drinking booths, which were the highlight of the festival.
Bonoh also thought he wanted to stay with Taeseong longer using alcohol as an excuse. However, Taeseong quietly observed Bonoh’s complexion and said he looked tired, so they should go home for today and meet again tomorrow instead. Actually, Bonoh had been exhausted from maintaining his guard all day while wandering around with Taeseong, starting from the dart throwing. Though he felt a bit disappointed, Bonoh swallowed his regret and nodded. The mental toll from anxiety and suspicion had been significant.
Late at night, the path to the dormitory was quiet. The lively conversation and music flowing from the drinking district gradually faded away. Though the sun had set, it was still early for college students in their early to mid-twenties to go home on a festival day, so this place was as quiet as another world.
Bonoh glanced at Taeseong’s profile as he walked silently beside him. Under the cold streetlight, Taeseong’s facial features were neat. Taeseong’s face was expressionless as always, but if you looked closely, it seemed like complex emotions were tangled within. Bonoh bit his lip.
When he woke up in the morning and heard that he and Taeseong were dating, Bonoh had been truly happy. He couldn’t believe Taeseong’s words that he had confessed, but he was secretly proud. Honestly, if he hadn’t borrowed the power of alcohol, he wouldn’t have been able to do it sober. It was disappointing that he couldn’t remember, but he’d thought it was fortunate that drinking had given him courage.
But now he regretted drinking that night. If he had spoken properly without alcohol from the start, he wouldn’t be this anxious. I should have just spoken like a man. Or at least when I woke up in the morning, I should have said right then that I didn’t remember.
Bonoh clenched his fist in his pocket. He couldn’t recall at all what atmosphere or exactly what conversation they’d had yesterday. But there was one thing he could be certain of. It was his feelings for Taeseong.
This won’t do. I really need to tell the truth and confess again. That I don’t remember, but my feelings for you are real.
He’d confessed once while drunk; there was no reason he couldn’t do it twice. Despite such determination, his heart was beating like crazy. His fingertips grew cold. Tension washed over him and his stomach churned, but it felt like now or never.
Bonoh took a deep breath.
“Hon-“
“Kim Bonoh.”
Both of them opened their mouths at the same time. Bonoh closed his mouth and looked up at Taeseong.
At that moment, Taeseong’s expression made Bonoh’s heart sink. Taeseong’s face under the streetlight was excessively serious. This was different from the usual Joo Taeseong. Just as Bonoh had made up his mind, Taeseong also had the look of someone who had firmly resolved something.
Bonoh’s breath caught. Could he be about to say let’s break up? It hadn’t even been a full day since they started dating. He couldn’t break up already when dating still didn’t feel real. There were so many things he wanted to do with Taeseong. Places he wanted to go together, things he wanted to eat together. He just wanted to be by his side without saying anything. Maybe someday he could be dumped, but not yet. No, to be more honest, he’d hate it even if he died.
“……!”
Before Taeseong could open his mouth, Bonoh hurriedly reached out his hand. And he pulled Taeseong into a tight embrace. Taeseong’s body stiffened momentarily.
“You know I really, really like you, right?”
Bonoh knew it was cowardly to say such things to someone about to bid farewell. But regardless of what he knew, his body moved first. His body was trembling so much that Bonoh deliberately hugged Taeseong even tighter. Taeseong’s build was much larger, so Bonoh ended up being the one held, but he didn’t have the luxury to care about such trivial things.
“Really, really like you.”
Bonoh squeezed his eyes shut and barely managed to continue speaking in a trembling voice. As he spoke, his throat stung and he felt like tears would come. But if he cried here, it would really be over, so Bonoh deliberately buried his face in Taeseong’s chest. He briefly thought that if they broke up, he’d have to say goodbye to Joo Taeseong’s chest too.
“Ah, I actually had something to say about that…”
At Taeseong’s words, Bonoh felt like his breath stopped.
About that…?
Bonoh, who had been mulling over his own words, froze completely. It was too clear that what Taeseong was about to say was related to his confession just now. Bonoh had no choice but to be certain of the possibility he’d tried to push away. Taeseong had definitely been about to say let’s break up.
“I’ll go in first!”
Bonoh cut off Taeseong’s words and shouted, then immediately spun around. And he disappeared into the dormitory entrance in an instant, not giving Taeseong a chance to grab his hand. Taeseong tried to catch Bonoh but couldn’t because he looked too desperate.
“…What the hell, really.”
Taeseong looked at the dormitory entrance where Bonoh had disappeared with a bewildered face. Kim Bonoh, did he need the bathroom urgently? Taeseong guessed it would have been embarrassing to say such things since they were new to dating. Or maybe it was embarrassing to say he liked him. Taeseong thought Kim Bonoh seemed to be more shy than he appeared.
“Ha, I’m really, really good? Jeez.”
Taeseong spoke as if it was ridiculous, but the corners of his mouth went up. If he really, really liked him, how had Kim Bonoh endured it without saying anything until now?
He vividly recalled how Kim Bonoh’s face would flush every time he used the term “honey,” and just now how much he’d been trembling, his two hands shaking as he hugged him, overwhelmed by emotion without even knowing. Well, if he was embarrassed by just a term of endearment, how much more so now? Even though he tried to hold back, laughter naturally leaked out.
Bonoh had left so he couldn’t say it, but what Taeseong was going to say was also related to that term of endearment. He’d been annoyed that Bonoh didn’t remember, so he’d tormented him with various lies, but seeing Bonoh anxious all day, Taeseong had intended to tell the truth. That it was all lies about being able to meet other people and the term of endearment too. He was going to threaten him that he’d let it slide this once, but in return, he shouldn’t even think about breaking up in the future.
“Ah, this is really ridiculous. It’s not just that I’m good, but really, really good? Haha…”
Taeseong muttered as he slowly moved his steps. The frustration from the night before and the anger from not remembering in the morning had completely disappeared from his face.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
