Chapter 35
After hesitating for a moment, I decided to continue since I had already started:
“Also, I don’t think it suits me that you’re so kind to girls. If we date… I might be bothered by you giving your number to everyone who asks.”
Yes, this is also a big problem. Not turning away women who approach him.
How many have I seen just over his shoulder? Can Joo Kwon-oh block all those temptations to meet with me?
“I don’t think I can handle it.”
So I’m not someone who can handle Joo Kwon-oh. There’s no guarantee his interest will continue to stay on someone as indecisive and frustrating as me.
The partner I imagine for Joo Kwon-oh would be someone with a bright expression and lively personality, rather than a gloomy guy like me.
“I won’t give out my number anymore. I’ll draw a clear line with girls too. Is that okay?”
Joo Kwon-oh said simply, but seriously. However, while his answer was good, it also bothered me.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Asking you to give up your good qualities because I don’t like them is… a bit…”
I didn’t dislike Joo Kwon-oh’s naturally considerate attitude towards girls as a person. I just didn’t like it from a dating perspective.
But even as I said it, I realized it was an irresponsible statement that I didn’t know what to do with. Was I telling him not to do it, or to do it?
I don’t know. What can I do when I don’t even know myself?
“Hmm.”
Joo Kwon-oh crossed his arms and was silent for a moment, as if thinking.
“So the conclusion is, I like you and you like me.”
“……”
“We’re in a relationship where we like each other.”
“Yeah.”
“But there are still things bothering you, so it’s difficult to start dating right away, right?”
If I had to say it, that’s it.
“After coming this far… I’m sorry.”
“I can’t push forward alone if you say you don’t want to.”
With those words, Joo Kwon-oh fell into thought again. He slightly lowered his head and shifted his gaze to the sand he was kicking at his feet.
After a few seconds, he lifted his head and stared at me.
“Then how about we meet just three times, Jeong-ha? We can decide whether to date or not after that.”
A much gentler voice flowed from his mouth than before. His voice moistened my earlobes sweetly, like maple syrup dripping onto pancakes.
Despite my rejection with silly logic, Joo Kwon-oh wasn’t intimidated at all. Rather, he was confident.
And suddenly, like a light bulb turning on, my dark mind brightened in an instant. Because that proposal sounded quite attractive to me.
Let’s just meet three times first. It was a tremendous breakthrough that removed the pressure of starting a “relationship” with him right away while maintaining the excitement so far.
If Joo Kwon-oh eventually gets tired of me, he can easily leave, and since we weren’t officially dating anyway, I would be less hurt too.
“Is this not okay either?”
“No, that’s… good.”
“Okay. We’ll decide after meeting exactly three times.”
Joo Kwon-oh emphasized again, as if securing a promise.
“Okay.”
“You have to answer again then.”
“Okay.”
Only then did Joo Kwon-oh grin and dig his feet into the ground. The swing made a creaking sound as it moved slightly back and forth.
I glanced at him sidelong, then gathered courage to speak.
“Um, can I ask you one thing?”
“You can ask ten things.”
“Am I… not creepy to you?”
“Why?”
Joo Kwon-oh stopped the swing abruptly and turned to face me.
I hesitated before answering.
“I eavesdropped on your conversations… and even recorded them… and drew pictures.”
As I confessed my crimes, my throat felt sore, as if there was a thorn stuck in it.
“Ah.”
“Are you really okay with that? You said you saw the whole notebook.”
“Well, if it was a girl I might not mind, but a guy doing that was surprising at first…”
Joo Kwon-oh muttered as if talking to himself while stroking his chin. I held my breath and waited for his next words.
“But why does it seem cute when you do it?”
“…Don’t joke around.”
“I’m serious.”
“……”
“I told you, I don’t lie.”
Joo Kwon-oh probably doesn’t know how much my mood jumps up and down with each of his words and actions. Yet it felt like he was teasing me after seeing right through me.
“I’m glad I walked you home yesterday.”
“Why?”
“Even if you run away without answering after we meet three times, I can chase you to your house.”
“Why would I run away… I won’t do that.”
As I shook my head in denial, Joo Kwon-oh tapped the toe of my shoe with his.
“You went to co-ed schools for middle and high school, right?”
“Yeah.”
As I looked at him wondering why he suddenly asked that, Joo Kwon-oh, who was staring at me intently, drew a curve on his lips.
“That’s good. If there was someone like you in an all-boys school, those dirty bastards would have been all over you. Co-ed is better.”
“What’s that supposed to mean.”
Joo Kwon-oh’s idea was funny. A guy being all over another guy.
Although I did do such things to Joo Kwon-oh… it’s actually not something that happens often in reality. Whether it was an all-boys school or co-ed probably wouldn’t have made much difference.
“Besides, I have high standards, so I wouldn’t have been interested even if someone was all over me.”
“Ah, so that’s why you like me.”
Joo Kwon-oh grinned and leaned towards me, gripping the swing handle. Feeling like our shoulders might touch, I stiffened my back and lowered my head deeply.
“…Yeah.”
“You have a surprisingly firm side to you.”
We swung slowly without speaking for a while. The playground was still empty except for me and Joo Kwon-oh, and bright sunlight poured down from the clear morning sky.
Suddenly curious, I opened my mouth.
“So when are we meeting? What are you doing tomorrow?”
Joo Kwon-oh, who was swinging slightly with his feet planted on the ground, made a troubled expression.
“I promised to fill in for someone’s shift tomorrow.”
“In Bucheon? Should I come too?”
“No. Absolutely not.”
“…Why?”
“It would be a waste to use up one of our three meetings like that. We should spend the whole day together for all three times.”
“……”
Feeling heat rush to my face, I lowered my head again. How does Joo Kwon-oh say such embarrassing things so naturally?
“Anyway, I have work tomorrow, so let’s meet next weekend.”
“Okay.”
“For the whole day.”
“Okay.”
“What do you want to do? If there’s anything you want, I’ll include it in our date plan.”
I swallowed hard at the word “date”.
“How about watching a movie?”
“Sounds good. Let’s see an early morning show next Saturday.”
“Isn’t that too early for a weekend?”
I shouldn’t be the one to say this, having called Joo Kwon-oh at dawn on a weekend.
“We’ll watch from morning till night. Don’t you like that?”
“I don’t dislike it. I like it. Watching from the morning…”
As I quickly answered, Joo Kwon-oh stopped kicking the ground.
I cleared my throat and gathered courage to speak.
“I told you. I… like you too.”
“But dating is difficult?”
His tone was somewhat playful.
“Yeah. Am I frustrating?”
I swallowed the rest of my words along with my saliva, having already pulled back all the way.
“No. I can wait.”
“But are you going to keep working part-time? You fill in for others often.”
“Ah, one of the weekend part-timers left recently. Since I became close with the manager, they keep asking through friends whenever there’s an opening.”
It made sense for the manager to do that. Joo Kwon-oh was good at his job and got along well with the other part-timers.
When I saw him before, he was the most active in moving heavy loads without trying to slack off. He was also skilled at serving. From the manager’s perspective, it must be disappointing that he only comes to work occasionally as a friend’s substitute.
“You must be tired working every weekend.”
“They said they’ll hire a new part-timer soon. I’m just helping out temporarily when they’re short-staffed.”
“I see.”
I wondered if I could visit the cafe just as a customer, regardless of the “meet three times” condition. But I didn’t ask because Bucheon is far and showing up unexpectedly might be disruptive. It seemed excessive to go all that way just to see Joo Kwon-oh.
“I’ll walk you home now.”
Joo Kwon-oh said as he stood up. For some reason, I felt reluctant and slowly got up, dawdling.
*
The next day.
[Joo Kwon-oh: (photo)]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Cute, right? lol]
I got a KakaoTalk message from Joo Kwon-oh in the morning. It was a photo of a kitten from the brunch cafe where he was filling in for a friend. The kitten with its fur sticking up was dozing off on a blanket, curled up like a loaf of bread.
As soon as I saw the photo, I unconsciously pressed save.
[Me: Wow]
[Me: It’s grown a lot haha]
[Joo Kwon-oh: It can open its eyes now and walk around]
[Me: Are they still keeping it at the cafe?]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Yeah]
[Joo Kwon-oh: In the staff room]
[Joo Kwon-oh: (photo)]
Joo Kwon-oh sent another photo. Kittens were playing on the lap and shoulders of Joo Kwon-oh, who was sitting in a chair, dozing off.
