Chapter 108
“Why is it so quiet today? Even online orders are slow.”
“…”
“Hey, Jeong-ha. Don’t just keep wiping the same spot, pay attention to that corner over there too.”
“Ah, yes.”
Only after hearing the boss’s words did I realize I had been wiping the same spot with the rag for several minutes.
I snapped out of it and cleaned the other side of the glass as the boss said.
Fast-tempo pop music was playing in the store, and the sound of the boss yawning lazily at the counter drifted into my ears.
In this extremely peaceful noise, I felt a yawn forming at the corners of my mouth too.
Then I consciously held back the yawn and took a deep breath. Maybe it’s because I’ve been living in tension for the past few days? Something feels unfamiliar. This calm atmosphere.
But my mind wasn’t completely at rest and was still full of anxiety.
‘What’s so simple for you?’
‘Are you really ending it this easily?’
The emotions about Joo Kwon-oh that I had been trying to push away came over me slowly like a counteraction. It was fortunate that the boss let it go without saying anything, but the sense of loss from breaking up with Joo Kwon-oh was too great.
The image of Joo Kwon-oh looking at me with a surprised face as I shouted loudly kept lingering in front of my eyes.
Are we really breaking up like this? It doesn’t feel real. Looking back, the past few months I spent with him felt like a dream.
“Huh? Hey, are you crying?”
The boss asked in surprise after watching me crouching and cleaning the glass for a while. I shook my head, as I was choked up but hadn’t actually shed tears.
“No, I’m not.”
“Why are you crying? Did you break up with that rough-looking guy?”
“I told you I’m not crying.”
“Oh, you really aren’t. Sorry. But if you’re not crying, can you clean a bit faster?”
The boss’s picky request made the tears that were about to come out retreat completely.
“Ah… Yes, I’m sorry.”
My pace was definitely slower than usual. I moved my body quickly, turning my gaze away in embarrassment.
“No need to be sorry. It’s a good time…”
The boss muttered in a tone that older adults would use. For a moment, I almost shot back asking if he was making fun of me.
This is good? What exactly? I just broke up with someone I like.
He was gloomy himself not long ago when he broke up with his girlfriend. It was annoying that he was now talking as if it was a trivial matter.
But not having the courage to confront him directly, I chose to keep my mouth shut and not respond.
After the part-time job ended safely, I packed my bag and greeted the boss.
“Thank you for your hard work. Goodbye.”
“Why are you going that way?”
The boss asked when he noticed me trying to sneak out through the back door connected to the storage room instead of leaving through the front door of the store.
I couldn’t say it was because Joo Kwon-oh might be waiting in front, so I hesitated without answering right away.
“…Just. This way is faster.”
“Ah. Is that so? Be careful on your way.”
The boss greeted me half-heartedly, seemingly having lost interest quickly.
Even after coming out through the back door, I walked quickly to the station, repeatedly looking around to see if there was anyone nearby. Fortunately, I didn’t run into Joo Kwon-oh.
Only after getting on the subway did the tension that had been building up finally release.
Joo Kwon-oh might not have been waiting in front of the store, but I couldn’t ignore the possibility. I didn’t want to expend any more emotions today.
Moreover, I still didn’t have the confidence to face him because I felt guilty about getting angry and turning my back on Joo Kwon-oh who was apologizing and saying he was wrong.
Luckily, I sat down as soon as I got on the subway and habitually checked the phone notifications that had accumulated while I was working.
[Hello. This is Muse Atelier. The custom engraved Apple Watch strap that you ordered has been shipped^^]
“Ah.”
There was a message from the leather workshop where I had ordered Joo Kwon-oh’s birthday gift. To receive this news on a day like today.
It felt real that Joo Kwon-oh’s birthday, which I had been preparing for diligently, was really not far away.
What should I do now that I can’t give him the gift? I had set the delivery address to my part-time job store to avoid Joo Kwon-oh finding out if it was delivered to my apartment…
As I was thinking I should receive it tomorrow and take it home, a new notification popped up on the screen.
[Joo Kwon-oh: You’re really cold-hearted…]
It was an Instagram DM sent by Joo Kwon-oh.
I stared quietly at the name that appeared on the screen, then unable to overcome my curiosity, I opened the DM chat.
[Joo Kwon-oh: You leave through a different door even though you know I’m waiting]
[Joo Kwon-oh: It’s true I met with the guys. But it wasn’t to hang out]
Joo Kwon-oh sent long DMs in succession. Instead of hastily replying, I quietly read the contents he was sending.
[Joo Kwon-oh: When you said Lee Sung-rok found out we’re dating, I purposely made plans to see if he had already spread rumors in the department.]
[Joo Kwon-oh: It would be weird to suddenly ask the guys if I’m dating Ryu Jeong-ha. You wouldn’t want that either.]
[Joo Kwon-oh: If that bastard had already spread rumors, I thought it would be easier to sound the guys out if some alcohol was involved, so that’s why I met them.]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Or the guys might try to sound me out too anyway]
[Joo Kwon-oh: That’s why I met them]
[Joo Kwon-oh: But it seems Lee Sung-rok didn’t say anything. There was no particular sign]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Anyway I honestly don’t care what that bastard is thinking. Because you were so anxious… I wanted to tell you not to worry. I wanted to tell you this earlier too.]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Seeing how you even told me to go on a blind date because of what that son of a bitch said, it seems like you’re really worried about it, so I met the guys first to check on that]
[Joo Kwon-oh: I hope there’s no misunderstanding. I don’t want to break up with you]
[Joo Kwon-oh: And honestly, I don’t care if everyone around us knows]
[Joo Kwon-oh: But I learned this time that you’re not like that]
[Joo Kwon-oh: So I’ll be more careful from now on]
[Joo Kwon-oh: I’ll try harder]
The stream of DMs that had been continuing for a while stopped.
I read the messages he sent again from the beginning. They were just texts without being able to hear his voice or see his expression, but each straightforward sentence without any twisted corners was very like Joo Kwon-oh.
Honestly, after breaking up like that earlier, I thought we might never see each other again. I was afraid that some invisible connection that had been holding us together might have been completely severed. It’s funny that I’m thinking this after being the one to say we should break up first, but that’s how I felt anyway.
But Joo Kwon-oh was holding onto me much more firmly than the cold words I had spit out.
After hesitating several times, I sent a reply.
[Me: What happened with the senior?]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Just fought a bit]
Joo Kwon-oh’s reply came in real-time. I unconsciously swallowed hard at the word “fought.”
[Me: Fought? How?]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Ah not like fist fighting or anything]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Just with words. Only words.]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Thinking about how he meddled unnecessarily, I did want to land one punch though]
As I was staring at the chat window, pondering how to reply, this time a phone call came from Joo Kwon-oh instead of a DM.
I was startled and took my thumb off the phone for a moment, then hurriedly pressed the end call button.
[Me: I’d rather not talk on the phone..]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Peach you’re really cold]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Won’t even let me hear your voice]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Anyway there was a reason I met the guys]
[Joo Kwon-oh: I’ve reflected a lot on getting angry so please forgive me]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Quickly cancel what you said about breaking up, peach]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Okay?]
[Joo Kwon-oh: ?]
[Joo Kwon-oh: (photo)]
Then Joo Kwon-oh sent one photo. It was a dim alley with streetlights on. The scenery in front of my part-time job store. A familiar place to me.
[Joo Kwon-oh: It’s really dark in this alley when I’m alone]
[Joo Kwon-oh: I didn’t realize because I always walked with you]
For some reason, those words made my throat tighten.
Thinking that he might be feeling exactly what I felt just a few days ago, standing alone in a dark, deserted alley, made me feel sorry.
And I regretted turning my back on him so coldly today. Especially since I thought I was the reason and cause for us having to break up, I felt even more sorry for yelling at him angrily.
Making him think he was wrong. His relationship with a close senior going sour. Saying strange things like telling him to go on blind dates. Everything was just full of apologies to him.
So Joo Kwon-oh didn’t need to apologize to me.
I wanted to go back to the front of the store right away and bring Joo Kwon-oh out of the darkness where he was alone.
[Me: I’m sorry]
I sent a DM to him, pressing my feelings tightly into it.
[Me: Don’t wait from now on]
[Joo Kwon-oh: If you cancel what you said about breaking up]
To stick to what I had originally decided, it would have been right to end the conversation saying I had no intention of canceling it, or not to reply at all.
However, seeing that photo, imagining Joo Kwon-oh standing alone in the alley we always walked together, I just couldn’t say the words of rejection.
[Me: Give me time to think]
[Joo Kwon-oh: How long]
[Joo Kwon-oh: ?]
[Me: A week..?]
[Joo Kwon-oh: What if I say no?]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Ah]
[Joo Kwon-oh: No cancel that]
[Joo Kwon-oh: I’ll wait]
[Joo Kwon-oh: But you have to tell me for sure when you’ve sorted out your thoughts]
[Joo Kwon-oh: Promise]
[Me: I promise]
