#057
Can a crazy Chihuahua suddenly learn to speak human language?
In Hwi-kyung’s mind, Sung-ha was rated worse than Park Bong-joon for hitting Marcia alone. At least Park Bong-joon was good at social interactions, while Sung-ha’s personality relied solely on his background, making him objectively worse than Park Bong-joon.
But now this subpar human was politely asking permission to speak informally. Hwi-kyung began to wonder if Sung-ha had eaten something wrong. Strange. I’m the one who just swallowed the fried lotus root…
“If it bothers you, you can speak informally too.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Picky bastard.”
After that, Sung-ha continued to speak informally to Hwi-kyung. Since he was indeed eight years younger physically, Hwi-kyung stopped pointing out Sung-ha’s informal speech.
His face, oddly similar to Gyo-ha’s, made it difficult to treat him harshly. Although Gyo-ha was much more handsome than Sung-ha with his once-broken nose, their dimpled smiles when laughing were quite similar. It was a face that truly made one feel blood is thicker than water.
Even apart from his appearance, Sung-ha made Hwi-kyung uncomfortable. Sung-ha’s behavior, as if he liked Hwi-kyung, doubled his confusion.
He couldn’t tell if the food was going into his nose or mouth. How could someone who had been so confrontational suddenly change their attitude like this? Even the regretful male lead in a romance novel would be criticized for this level of change.
Anyone would be bewildered if someone who had injured their temple and arm a few weeks ago was now asking if they enjoyed Korean food. Buying a meal for someone whose nose you broke? As far as Hwi-kyung knew, Sung-ha wasn’t that magnanimous.
“Looking at you closely, you’re prettier than I thought.”
“…Pardon?”
“I mean you.”
Condition Not Met: Your superior evaluates your appearance.
“I think I might be able to get it up for you if I try.”
Condition Not Met: Workplace sexual harassment detected.
Even Hwi-kyung, who had experienced all sorts of sexual harassment over the years, had never heard such words while dining at a traditional Korean restaurant. The sexual harassment Hwi-kyung had heard before was usually along the lines of “Tall men are weak in bed” or “You’re a prude for not going to hostess bars.”
While those weren’t entirely sane either, they weren’t as absurd as Sung-ha’s “I think I could get it up for you.” The system window seemed as bewildered as Hwi-kyung, repeatedly popping up new windows labeling Sung-ha’s every utterance as sexual harassment.
“Have you slept with Gyo-ha?”
“…”
“You’re just pretending to be lovers, right? You’re not really dating.”
“…”
“Since you’re both men, did you just give him a blowjob?”
Condition Not Met: Your superior shows interest in your private life.
Condition Not Met: Your superior’s sexual harassment comments accumulate.
Would you like to regress?
Sung-ha accomplished in two days what had taken Gyo-ha several weeks. Hwi-kyung stared quietly at the system window’s question about whether he wanted to regress.
The system window seemed to hope that Hwi-kyung would immediately splash water in Sung-ha’s face and regress. But Jung Hwi-kyung had no intention of voluntarily pressing the ‘Y’ button unless he was forcibly regressed.
“Vice President.”
“What?”
“You shouldn’t ask such questions just anywhere.”
“…”
“And I don’t think I could get it up for you, Vice President.”
Condition Not Met: You responded to your superior’s sexual harassment with sexual harassment.
Condition Not Met: You used inappropriate language with your superior.
This iteration was ruined anyway. Hwi-kyung reminded himself of this fact once again. Even if the fifteenth iteration started right now, he wouldn’t regret it as he hadn’t accumulated anything. All he had done in the fourteenth iteration was greet someone else’s family, wasn’t it?
In the next iteration, Marcia, who had become quite close to him, wouldn’t recognize Hwi-kyung, but other than that, there was nothing to be sorry about. As long as Gyo-ha followed him over, Marcia’s working environment would be guaranteed throughout.
So instead of suppressing his thoughts as before, Hwi-kyung blurted out exactly what he was thinking. The system window seemed surprised that he was saying such things to a far superior, as new windows kept popping up one after another.
At times like this, Hwi-kyung felt that the system window wasn’t just an inanimate object but a living thing with its own consciousness. It was similar to a slightly overbearing and annoying aunt. Not particularly helpful, but still sensitive to such issues, claiming to be family.
In any case, it was fortunate that the opaque system window partially obscured Sung-ha’s slightly crumpled face. Listening to nonsense from a face similar to Gyo-ha’s kept making his blood boil.
“You say you can’t get it up?”
“Yes.”
“How do you know without trying?”
“I can’t get it up for someone eight years older than me.”
“What?”
“And I can’t get it up for a man whose nose I broke. Too bad.”
It was half serious. Hwi-kyung placed the maximized system window in front of Sung-ha, who was looking at him with an incredulous expression. Fortunately, with his face covered, it became much easier to draw the line.
* * *
Surprising events continued that evening. Gyo-ha, who had finally come to pick up Hwi-kyung in front of the company, admitted that he hadn’t willingly returned the handkerchief to Sung-ha.
“Did you forget?”
“No. I just didn’t want to return it.”
“…Why?”
“I was jealous.”
Gyo-ha said he was jealous so easily. Hwi-kyung stared dumbly at Gyo-ha’s profile, unable to hide his bewilderment.
Thanks to belonging to a different workplace than Gyo-ha, the system window no longer popped up even when Hwi-kyung stared at him like this. Hwi-kyung found this both fortunate and slightly regrettable. While it was good that he could read Gyo-ha’s expressions more easily, his own face was also too openly exposed. As a result, it became increasingly difficult to hide his expressions in front of Gyo-ha.
“Did Sung-ha say anything about not returning the handkerchief?”
Even now, Gyo-ha asked as if he had guessed what had happened just by looking at Hwi-kyung’s expression. Since he had no intention of hiding it anyway, Hwi-kyung nodded slowly.
“He wanted to have lunch together, saying he’d get the handkerchief back.”
“What?”
“We went to that Korean restaurant today… Hey, why the sudden brake?”
“I was surprised.”
“I was more surprised!”
Hwi-kyung decided he needed to take the steering wheel from Gyo-ha. But even when Hwi-kyung said he would drive and suggested switching seats, Gyo-ha remained silent as if he had turned to stone.
“You haven’t started to like Sung-ha more than me, have you?”
Hwi-kyung was dumbfounded that Gyo-ha could ask such an absurd question while refusing to let go of the steering wheel. He wanted to rummage through Gyo-ha’s mind to see how he could come to such a conclusion. He was curious about how Gyo-ha could imagine such absurd things so well.
“Hwi-kyung, you’re weaker to looks than I thought…”
“Me?”
“Yes.”
“No, I’m not.”
“I think you are. I’ve been thinking about it, and the only reason you might like me is my face.”
“…”
“Am I wrong?”
Gyo-ha was certainly more talented at annoying people than Sung-ha. Hwi-kyung punched Gyo-ha’s shoulder repeatedly as he kicked him out of the driver’s seat. Pushed by Hwi-kyung to the passenger seat, Gyo-ha immediately looked dejected.
“If it’s not my face, then what? Why do you like me?”
It was amazing that he could ask such questions so easily. Every time he was with Gyo-ha, Hwi-kyung had to be surprised by his honesty. What Gyo-ha could do easily was usually extremely difficult for Jung Hwi-kyung.
“Why are you asking such things?”
“I’m curious.”
“…”
“I like your face.”
Hearing those words doubled his bewilderment. It reminded him of what Sung-ha had said. Sung-ha had spouted nonsense about Hwi-kyung looking pretty and that he might be able to get it up for him if he tried.
Was Gyo-ha similar? It’s not uncommon to feel attraction based on looks alone. But thinking that Gyo-ha might be treating him well for reasons similar to Sung-ha’s inevitably made him feel bad.
“After regressing fourteen times, you’re still swayed by someone’s appearance?”
Despite having given Sung-ha some leeway because of his resemblance to Gyo-ha, Hwi-kyung boldly spat out such words. Gyo-ha rubbed his cheek awkwardly at Hwi-kyung’s rebuke.
“It’s not just your face. If I explained in detail, you might jump out of the car.”
“…Just keep quiet.”
“Should I really not say anything?”
“Yes. Let’s be silent from now on.”
The uncomfortable feeling from being told his face was nice quickly dissipated. Hwi-kyung judged that his own state of mind, swinging back and forth with just a few words from Gyo-ha, was serious.
Hwi-kyung currently had a grand plan to safely oust Park Bong-joon. Being swayed by personal feelings when no public matters had been resolved was a shortcut to failure.
At least until the condition of forced regression upon joining a black company disappeared, Hwi-kyung had to maintain an appropriate distance from Gyo-ha. Even knowing they had mutual feelings, Hwi-kyung had too much at stake in this regression to surrender to his emotions thoughtlessly like Gyo-ha.
“Really, don’t come to pick me up tomorrow.”
“…Can I speak now?”
“…”
“I won’t come to pick you up, so relax your expression.”
“And return the handkerchief to Sung-ha.”
“Ah…”
“Stop the nonsense about not wanting to return it because you’re jealous and give it back right away. If I get more entangled with Sung-ha, I’m likely to be forcibly regressed.”
“I understand.”
Hwi-kyung, who had been listing in detail what Gyo-ha should and shouldn’t do as if scolding a child, only realized after a while that he was unconsciously heading towards Gyo-ha’s officetel.
“I’ll return the handkerchief to Sung-ha, so stay over tonight too.”
“You’re really out of your mind…”
“What?”
“Just expressing disappointment in myself.”
Hwi-kyung harshly shook off Gyo-ha, who was clinging to him pathetically, asking him to stay just one more night. Lee Gyo-ha wasn’t a drizzle, he was a waterfall. Being beside him wasn’t a case of not noticing your clothes getting wet in a drizzle; you’d suddenly be soaked and think, ‘Huh? Why am I wet?’
Taking a taxi despite all of Gyo-ha’s pitiful acts was an act close to self-reflection. Hwi-kyung muttered to himself to remember his primary goal:
“My goal is to retire…”
Romance was only possible if all the black companies in the world disappeared, or if his regression system disappeared. Hwi-kyung reminded himself of this fact once again.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
