“It’s nice that you suggested we take a walk first, hyung.”
“Nice?”
“It’s the first time. That you asked first.”
Was it? I rubbed my palate with the tip of my tongue. As if to announce the arrival of spring, flowers had bloomed in every direction. I didn’t know a single name of any of them, yet somehow they felt familiar.
Was it just a feeling? Maybe. Lately, I’d been reading whatever came into my hands, regardless of genre… Perhaps one of them was a field guide about flowers. I’d been so completely focused on Baek Tae-beom that I could barely remember what I’d even read.
“You’ve just been reading all the time lately.”
“There’s nothing else to do now.”
“What do you mean, nothing?”
Baek Tae-beom raised one eyebrow. Every time he made that expression, I found it so damn cute I didn’t know what to do with myself. Did he know? As he said, “There’s still lots of stuff, though,” his eyes narrowed slightly.
“…Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Huh?”
“You just looked at me like I was some weirdo.”
“Did I?”
“Yes.”
“I didn’t.”
Baek Tae-beom frowned. That meant he felt wronged. I was debating whether I should just grab his face and tug on his cheeks, regardless of whether he avoided my touch, when he suddenly leaned down toward me.
The sunlight was blocked. His eyes, as he looked down at me, were sweet.
“Hyung, here. You’ve got something on you.”
“Where?”
“Hold on….”
Baek Tae-beom gently brushed through my hair. I savored his touch. And the furious pounding of my heart whenever he came close. The unfiltered purity of my feelings, untouched by anything else.
What was I supposed to do with this?
It was too raw, too bare. If I revealed all of it just like this, I felt like Baek Tae-beom might be shocked and run away. Who would’ve thought I held feelings this deep and vivid? I wanted to ask—Did you know?
“That’s better now.”
I suddenly grabbed the arm of the man trying to pull away from me.
He looked startled. His thick brows twitched, and the corner of his eyes trembled. It felt like I was facing a living statue carved just to speak.
The park was still in the evening, but few people were around. That only made me pull his arm more freely.
I held onto the sleeve that seemed like it was about to slip away and slipped my hand between his widely spread fingers. Intertwining my fingers tightly with his large, scar-covered hand, I pulled Baek Tae-beom toward me. His face instantly turned red. The tips of his ears flushed a deep crimson.
“Hyung? What are you—”
“I like you.”
I whispered it, close enough for our bodies to touch.
I remembered the time when all I did was fill you with apologies. I had been terrified then. My head had been clouded with fear. The idea that someone like me could be loved by someone else—it was a concept I couldn’t grasp.
Because even I didn’t love myself.
But you held on to me. Even if you hadn’t been taught what it meant, that didn’t mean you didn’t understand.
“You like me too.”
As I said that, I watched Baek Tae-beom’s face. His flushed cheeks slowly returned to normal. He bit his lower lip, trying to pull his hand away from mine, but I held on stubbornly. I could see clearly how flustered he was.
“Right?”
“Wait, let go of this first…”
“Running away again?”
Then I’d have to force the reason out of you.
“Why do you always avoid me?”
“When did I ever…!”
“You dodge when I try to hug you, and run when I try to hold your hand.”
“That’s…!”
Baek Tae-beom looked down at me with a troubled expression. As he took one step back, I stepped in two steps closer. I gripped his hand tighter. I could feel my nails grazing the back of his hand.
“That’s?”
“…That’s none of your business, hyung.”
My body went rigid. What did you just say? Did I hear that wrong? But the gaze fixed on me, and the voice I’d just heard were too sharp to mistake.
It’s none of my business?
My tangled thoughts suddenly went blank. Without realizing it, I let go of his hand, and Baek Tae-beom took another step back. His expression still looked troubled.
Something felt off.
Just like that misunderstanding last time…
I pressed the issue, relentless. There was no way those words had really come from Baek Tae-beom’s mouth.
“Why isn’t it something I should care about?”
“Well…”
“Well?”
Baek Tae-beom bit his lip, then sharply turned his head. He tousled his hair wildly. He looked like someone with too much on his mind, and for a brief moment, I wondered if I had done something wrong.
Had I said something I shouldn’t have? Did I screw up? My lips parted in nervous hesitation as I reached out to grab his sleeve again—but just then, Baek Tae-beom turned back to face me.
His eyes were scrunched tight with tension.
“We’re not… not like that yet.”
“What?”
“I mean… ha…”
Baek Tae-beom sighed, dragging his hand down his face. But I couldn’t even focus on that. Only the voice I’d just heard rang in my head, looping over and over.
Not like that yet?
Oblivious to my stunned silence, Baek Tae-beom started muttering rapidly, half hiding behind his sleeve.
“We’re not even dating yet, and I… I really do like you, hyung, seriously. But thinking back, I rushed too much with the physical stuff… It probably made me look like some horny guy…”
Burying his face in both hands, he sighed again.
“I kept trying to figure out how to confess properly, but you never seemed interested. Always reading or sleeping…”
“Wait.”
“I even asked Oh Kwon-hyuk for help ‘cause I don’t have any friends, but he just laughed at me. God… I’ve never done this kind of thing before.”
“Hold on, Tae-beom.”
Finally, I couldn’t stop myself from asking the question I’d been choking back.
“We weren’t already dating?”
“What?”
Baek Tae-beom looked at me like I’d just said something completely insane.
The wind blew. Leaves rustled in the trees. We stood there for a long time, just staring at each other like idiots.
***
We sat on a bench in silence. Baek Tae-beom had his face buried in one hand, his entire face flushed red. I stared at him in disbelief.
“You said all that, and you still thought we weren’t dating?”
“Well… I mean, I like you, hyung. But I wasn’t sure you felt the same way.”
“You said you’d stay by my side forever. You even made a promise.”
“Being by your side is… is different! Dating’s something else entirely…!”
My temples throbbed. My head ached. I rubbed my face and sighed. Baek Tae-beom flinched.
“Fine, I get it. It’s my fault for not making things clear.”
He mumbled in a voice barely above a whisper.
“…You know this is, like, the least romantic moment ever, right?”
“I didn’t need you to point that out.”
“I have so much I wanted to say to you.”
“You think I don’t?”
After a pause, Baek Tae-beom reached out hesitantly. His broad palm hovered there. I slowly placed my fingers on top of it, threading them together. The hand that had looked ready to run just moments ago now held mine firmly, gripping tight.
“…Hyung.”
“Yeah.”
“Will you go out with me?”
Even his question was impossibly tender. He was so lovely I wanted to scream. I managed to hold it back—but my heart was pounding like mad.
These were my feelings, fully and truly mine.
They weren’t just ripening—they were about to burst. Overflowing. If someone didn’t bite into them, they’d just spill over and flood everything down to my toes. That’s how much I liked him. That’s how much I loved him.
Because I liked you.
“I will.”
“…Ah, fuck.”
Baek Tae-beom pulled my hand toward him and pressed his forehead to the back of it. His ears were glowing red. When I let out a soft laugh, he scolded me not to—but he never once let go of my hand.
“I had a whole list of things I was going to say when I confessed, and now they’re totally useless.”
“What did you want to say so badly?”
“Since when I started liking you, why I feel this way…”
Still resting his forehead against my hand, Baek Tae-beom glanced up at me with a sheepish smile.
“I wanted to tell you everything. Let you know, properly.”
“…Doesn’t seem like it’s useless at all.”
I leaned in and whispered to Baek Tae-beom.
“Tell me one thing every day.”
“…Every day?”
“Mm, every day.”
I slowly tilted my head and rested it on his shoulder. Now I understood why the flowers felt so familiar.
It was because they were just like Baek Tae-beom. As brilliant and dazzling as his outward appearance, blooming smiles like petals, and a sweetness that felt like honey on the tip of my tongue.
“Then I’ll tell you my story too.”
The winter we shared hadn’t been all harshness. We held hands and somehow moved forward. Even when we thought we were nothing, we never doubted that we had each other. And because of that, spring had finally come.
“I love you.”
I already knew those words all too well. Your love had overflowed so much that it became me. I laughed out loud.
“I love you too.”
<End of Main Story — continued in the epilogue>
