Extra Chapter 2-8
As soon as I heard the question, I thought deeply about it. Ridiculously enough, I had the urge to lift his blanket. I wanted to rub my naked body against Mitchell. Should I take off my clothes here then? Wow, everything fell into place.
My past self really lived doing whatever he wanted.
“Don’t worry… I have no intention of doing that.”
“Just in case, don’t think about doing weird things to other men even if you’re gay. It’s only because it’s me that I’m keeping quiet about it. If you get caught by someone else, the whole world will know about your preferences. It’ll be in the news right away.”
“I absolutely won’t do that! It’s surprising that I came onto you. The current me doesn’t think I could ever confess to a man.”
“But you did.”
I paused for a beat before answering.
“Maybe I liked you that much?”
Mitchell laughed while shaking his body. My words seemed to please him. Seeing that face, I laughed along.
“Geon-woo, you’ve given me a nasty habit.”
“What kind of habit?”
“Whenever I lie in bed, you always used to climb on top of me. You’d crawl between my legs and suck… But for a while, I was quite bored because you weren’t doing that anymore.”
It was shocking that I had done such things to Mitchell. At the same time, I seemed to understand why Mitchell had been pestering me who couldn’t remember. It seems Mitchell was also somewhat annoyed when I suddenly stopped doing the things I used to do to him. Even if they were strange actions.
“You used to come to our house every morning, torment my body and ask to be tormented… Want to come in here? I’ll let you do what you used to do every day.”
Mitchell lifted the edge of the blanket and put it back down. It meant I could come in under it.
“Actually, I’ve adjusted to the situation where you don’t come to my house. Even though you created the habit, it wasn’t of my own volition. You were quite forceful. I probably heard love confessions more than thousands of times.”
I looked for the timing to say sorry again. But before I could open my mouth, Mitchell continued.
“I don’t particularly want it now, but if you want to, come here.”
I hadn’t thought about wanting to go under the blanket, but since he gave permission, it felt like I should. Instead, I don’t like that calm and shameless attitude. It felt like I was missing something.
Why do I keep feeling like I’m being wronged?
“If you don’t want it, I’d feel sorry if I did it. It’s okay.”
I scratched my forehead and showed my intention to refuse.
“I’m okay too. People should do what they want to do in life. And didn’t the doctor say to manage your stress well? Don’t you need to be in good condition for your memory to return quickly?”
I clearly didn’t intend to, but my thoughts gradually changed. It might be because I heard the same words repeated. The indoctrination worked quite well.
I, who had been standing blankly, climbed onto the bed. A mixture of slight reluctance, even greater anticipation, and overwhelming trembling made my breath catch. As I sat down on his lower body, I felt Mitchell’s gaze. He was looking at me with an interested face, like someone with new food in front of them.
But surely, surely…
“You didn’t lie to me, did you? Honestly, it’s hard to believe that I acted like this.”
“Just try it first. You’ll probably feel whether it’s your first time or not.”
“No matter how I look at it, it seems like you’re teasing me.”
“If you don’t want to, then don’t. Let’s just eat.”
Mitchell tried to get up as if he had no lingering attachment at all. Looking at his actions, it seemed like he had offered himself not because of his own desires, but truly because I wanted it. My subconscious saying not to stress. To do what I want to do, even like this.
“No!”
Feeling like I had just kicked away an opportunity without even understanding Mitchell’s deep intentions, I hurriedly stopped him. I put aside unnecessary doubts and crawled between his legs.
Then Mitchell looked at me with incomprehensible eyes. For some reason, unable to bear that gaze, I lowered my head.
Ah… somehow it was too familiar.
Mitchell had clearly said it. That I would feel whether it was my first time or not.
My instinct tells me. I definitely did this in the past too.
There was no hesitation.
I opened my mouth.
***
“Sit there. I just need to set up a simple meal.”
As soon as we came out of the bedroom, Mitchell started preparing the meal. When I said I would help, he immediately pushed me away saying it was easier to do it alone. As I sat on the living room sofa waiting for Mitchell, a delicious smell quickly spread.
It didn’t take much time, but dishes came out one by one. Surprisingly, it was jeyuk-bokkeum (stir-fried spicy pork) and manduguk (dumpling soup). It’s a menu that makes my mouth water, but I had no idea I would be eating Korean food at Mitchell’s house.
“Wow, surely you didn’t make this yourself?”
I naturally assumed it was the work of a helper who manages the house and cooks, but Mitchell shook his head.
“I made it. I made it as soon as I got home earlier. I’m good at cooking, you know.”
“Really?”
His grinning face seemed to be hiding a lot. The fact that the food looked as neat as store-bought was also enough to make me suspicious. But I gave up, thinking it wasn’t right to interrogate someone who had kindly prepared food for me.
“I’ve been learning to cook since I was young. Mastered French, Italian, and even Korean and Japanese cuisine. There’s nothing I can’t do.”
No matter how shameless, I thought he wouldn’t tell such a lie. Although the reason he’s been smiling is suspicious, as I kept listening, it seemed to be true.
“It’s really delicious.”
“Is it?”
It looks good and tastes top-notch. I saw Mitchell in a new light, surprised that he could make Korean food this delicious. I even thought I wanted to live here every day.
Mitchell, who had been watching me with satisfaction as I kept expressing amazement throughout the meal, prepared cheese for dessert. He opened the wine I had brought, and we spent a rare peaceful time. Mitchell was good with words and made me laugh even with trivial stories.
I don’t know for what reason I fell in love with him before I lost my memory, but it seemed I would fall in love with him even now after losing my memory. I guess I’m a person who needs to look at Mitchell anytime, in any situation.
After the meal was over, a dark night had already arrived. I offered to help clean up, but Mitchell pushed me out of the kitchen again this time too.
“There’s nothing to do. It’ll be quick once I start the dishwasher.”
I was touched again. The moments of falling in love are a series of common things. He captivated me with seemingly insignificant actions.
I entered the bathroom to brush my teeth and started brushing with a blue toothbrush. While staring at my face reflected in the mirror, I noticed the toothbrush I had picked up and put in my mouth so familiarly. I naturally thought it was mine and that’s why I used it. Mitchell’s toothbrush was the white one placed right next to it.
This place, with even a toothbrush prepared, felt just like my home. While the floor below, which is actually my house, felt awkward, this place, although someone else’s house, felt comfortable and unburdensome. From Mitchell’s perspective, it must have been an unagreed cohabitation, but it was clear that I had been living in this house in the past.
I must have been really bothersome to Mitchell. And Mitchell understood me like that.
He was a grateful guy. I owed a great debt to Mitchell who didn’t ignore my feelings.
After washing my face to sober up, Mitchell had pretty much finished cleaning up too. I sat quietly at the edge of the bed waiting for Mitchell who had gone to wash up. I was going to ask if I could stay the night.
And a while later, Mitchell came out. He looked somewhat awkward fully dressed in a T-shirt and shorts.
“You haven’t left yet? Go now.”
His half-wet hair covered his forehead. Mitchell, with that seemingly gentle face, was trying to drive me out of this place.
“Can’t I sleep here tonight?”
“I have filming tomorrow morning. And I can’t sleep well when someone’s next to me.”
“Really?”
I agreed, but I didn’t actually get up. With a feeling of regret, I made one last attempt. If he still said no, I’d have no choice.
“I’ll sleep in the living room. I won’t bother you. Let me stay.”
“I can’t because I’m conscious of other people being around. Come in the morning like you always used to. Around 7 AM. You always did that.”
“In the morning?”
“Yeah. Now go.”
As we talked, I suddenly realized that our relationship had reversed. Just before Mitchell told me about my feelings, if Mitchell had been following me around, now the situation had flipped. With the single fact that I had been in unrequited love with him, my position had fallen. The interesting thing was that it didn’t feel bad.
“Okay. See you tomorrow.”
If I kept insisting, our relationship might sour. I decided to come tomorrow morning without being clingy and cleanly. As long as my heart was fully satisfied, it didn’t matter if Mitchell didn’t love me back. Even if I couldn’t stay the night, I could see him tomorrow.
But Mitchell threw a question different from my decision.
“Do you dislike leaving that much?”
He suddenly said to my back as I was about to go out the door.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
