He tried to walk past me. I quickly grabbed Cedric’s arm. Cedric stopped and looked at me.
“Cedric, I’m really okay. And even if it’s return-heat disease, it might not get worse just because we had a relationship.”
“Revril, if someone in your condition has a child, the symptoms can get worse. Your health comes first.”
I lowered my hand weakly. He said I came first, but I still felt a strange wall between us. It was the same wall I had felt so many times over the past three years.
Cedric gently held my hand. When I looked up, Cedric gave me a soft smile.
“I’ll be back.”
I slowly nodded. Cedric let go of my hand and left the room. Once the door closed, a deep silence surrounded me.
‘I’m really okay.’
If anything, having a child might bring more life to me. I lowered my head and looked at my hand. Cedric’s warmth had brushed against it, but strangely, now I felt cold.
I stared at my hand for a while, then slowly turned my head to look at the table. Among the neatly prepared food, I saw a white paper with pills on it.
“Cedric is acting like this because your blood is dirty.”
But I tried to shake off that thought. Cedric wouldn’t think that way.
I got up weakly and sat at the table, forcing myself to eat. Without Cedric, it was hard to swallow anything. Even drinking water didn’t help. In the end, I pulled the bell cord.
A maid quickly came and cleared the food off the table. After taking the medicine, I sat still in the chair, when I heard laughter from somewhere.
Since the window was open, the sound from the first floor reached even here. I was already sensitive, and it ruined my mood. Since I was planning to leave anyway, I didn’t hesitate to walk out.
Just then, a maid was walking down the hallway.
“Who’s downstairs?”
The maid stopped immediately and lowered her head. She spoke in a trembling voice.
“Lady Selena and Lady Herder are having tea.”
“Selena hasn’t left yet?”
The maid nodded. Feeling confused, I went straight down the stairs. As I walked toward the parlor, the laughter got louder. I didn’t feel good.
It was just as I stepped into the parlor.
“Lady Herder really is good at everything.”
It was a particularly cheerful voice. Selena and Herder were sitting at the table, smiling and talking with each other. They seemed to be enjoying themselves a lot.
I stepped closer. Herder looked at me while holding a teacup. She smiled widely.
“Lady Revril, you’re here.”
I just gave a simple greeting and asked Selena,
“Selena, you haven’t gone back yet?”
Selena smiled softly and said,
“Lady Nancy said it’s fine for me to stay here for a month.”
A month. That made me feel uncomfortable. As I stood still, Selena kindly spoke again.
“Lady Revril, please come join us. Especially the cookies Lady Herder made—they’re really good.”
Herder also smiled and nodded.
“I made plenty. Come and try some.”
Herder touched her stomach as she looked at me. Her belly didn’t seem very big. I shook my head, not feeling like it.
“My stomach doesn’t feel well.”
“Shall I call a doctor for you?”
“No, I think I’ll feel better after some rest.”
Saying that, I went back up to my room. If I returned to the Bestine estate, Selena might really stay here with Cedric for a whole month.
Besides, since she was close to Herder and also to Cedric’s mother, even if Cedric asked her to leave, she might still stay nearby. Cedric and Selena had known each other since they were kids, after all. I couldn’t help but worry.
‘Cedric said he would be staying here for a month…’
Of course, I didn’t doubt Cedric. But it still bothered me that Selena was here. I didn’t like how she already acted like this place was her own home.
If Cedric came back, maybe I should tell him directly… But then I felt like I was asking too much of him again. After all, it was usually the hostess who handled house guests.
I pulled the bell cord. This time, I thought it would be better to speak directly myself. That way, there wouldn’t be any misunderstandings.
A few minutes later, a maid came in.
“You called, my lady?”
“Can you call Lady Selena for me? She’s probably still talking with Lady Herder in the parlor. When they’re done, tell her I want to speak with her. Please try to make sure Lady Herder doesn’t hear about it.”
I didn’t want Herder to know, in case it led to unnecessary talk. I wanted to speak to Selena alone. The maid seemed to understand and nodded obediently.
I spent some time staring out the window. After a while, their voices quieted, and a few minutes later, the maid knocked on the door. I opened it right away.
“Lady Selena said she will wait for you in the garden behind the house.”
I immediately left the room.
Since I had been stuck in the room for so long, the outside air felt unfamiliar. Still, I didn’t hesitate and walked toward the back garden.
It was the same place where I had met Cedric before. As I passed the familiar trees, I saw Selena standing there.
She smiled brightly as soon as she saw me. For a moment, I paused, thinking that this is what a noble lady should look like. Selena came closer.
“I actually wanted to talk to you alone, Lady Revril.”
“That’s good.”
I was relieved that we were on the same page. Just as I felt more at ease, Selena spoke calmly.
“I was really surprised when Cedric said he was getting married. Of course, I was at the academy at the time, so I couldn’t attend the wedding, but still, I didn’t expect him to get married so suddenly.”
Why was she suddenly bringing up Cedric? And since I didn’t know exactly what his situation was back then, I didn’t know how to respond. Selena looked at me closely and said,
“You and Cedric weren’t very close before, right?”
It was a very rude question. I looked at Selena, wondering if I heard her wrong. She was smiling, but she stared at me as if she really wanted an answer.
“Why are you asking?”
“I was just curious. The Cedric I knew never had anything to do with you. And every time I visited, he wasn’t even interested in women, let alone in a relationship.”
“……”
“So it’s still hard to believe he got married. I never thought Cedric would act so openly affectionate either.”
Selena sounded very flustered, as if she still couldn’t believe Cedric’s actions.
“Anyway, it’s still strange to me. When I came back from the academy, Cedric was already married and gone, and I was the only one left here.”
Selena sounded cheerful, but there was a bitter feeling at the end of her words. I didn’t want to hear about her past. I wasn’t curious at all.
“Selena.”
When I opened my mouth, Selena looked at me with curious eyes. She seemed to really be waiting to hear what I would say, with a faint smile on her face. Since she had said everything she wanted, I quickly got to the point.
“I’d like you to go back now.”
Selena’s expression froze instantly. After a moment, she said,
“I didn’t come here to see you, Lady Revril. I came to keep Lady Nancy company.”
“But staying here for a whole month…”
“What are you so worried about?”
I couldn’t say it out loud. I just didn’t like that she had a past connection with Cedric. And since I was about to leave the house, the idea of her staying here for a month bothered me even more. Even though Cedric had no interest in Selena, I still felt uneasy around her.
As I looked at her with a serious face, Selena calmly explained.
“Lady Nancy is having a hard time. She told me several times how thankful she was to have someone like me to talk to.”
“But I’d still prefer if you left. I think Lady Herder is enough company for her.”
Selena looked at me without saying a word. Her gaze was quite direct. I tried to speak while considering her position.
“Of course, I know this may sound sudden, but I’m leaving this house too.”
“You’re leaving?”
I nodded and tried to say it nicely.
“Yes, so I feel bad that I can’t take proper care of guests. That’s why I’m asking.”
“……”
“Of course, if I were staying here, I could treat you better. But since I’m leaving, wouldn’t it be strange for you to stay alone here?”
