Bombshell Statement (4)
Gradually regaining his composure, he slowly muttered.
“So, that’s how it was.”
“…”
“…Shit, this is driving me crazy.”
Mumbling what sounded like an exclamation in a daze, he appeared quite shocked. Just then, a group of people passed behind Mo Yeon.
They were in front of the Business School building, and the people were fellow students from the same department whose faces were familiar to Mo Yeon.
As one of them was about to brush past Mo Yeon’s back—
Suddenly, Tae Young-won grabbed Mo Yeon’s shoulder and swiftly turned him aside.
“Hello, sunbae…”
“Can’t you watch where you’re going?”
Mo Yeon’s eyes widened at the growling voice. Mo Yeon wasn’t the only one surprised. The juniors who encountered this unfamiliar side of Tae Young-won were equally shocked.
“W-what?”
“Stop flaunting your yang energy and get lost, you male bastards!”
Has this sunbae gone crazy?!
“Sunbae!”
Mo Yeon urgently pulled Tae Young-won’s arm. After gesturing to the bewildered juniors to move along, Mo Yeon finally scolded him.
“Are you crazy, sunbae? This is school!”
“Did you see that? How that guy was pretending to pass by but trying to rub against you? That’s how it happens when they touch you, right?”
Mo Yeon still couldn’t believe what had just happened.
Tae Young-won had always been someone who received attention from others, and because of that, he was always careful not to do anything that might attract negative attention. It seemed ingrained in him, even if he didn’t want it to be.
“Now that I think about it, even before we were formally introduced, you would touch me and run away whenever we met in the lecture hall. Pretending not to, but whenever our skin touched, your eyes would go blank. You confused me by touching me even while saying you didn’t want a partner. Was that all because of yang energy?”
“…”
“So it wasn’t that you liked touching me specifically.”
“Ah, no…”
Honestly, it had been about yang energy from the beginning, but putting it that way was a bit… When Mo Yeon didn’t deny it, shock once again appeared in Tae Young-won’s eyes.
“Then if you felt something when you touched that guy just now?”
“…”
“Would I be replaced immediately?”
Mo Yeon blinked for a moment. Honestly, if something like that had really happened, it would have been very interesting.
For someone as unlucky as him all his life, would there even be a second stroke of luck?
“Well…”
Mo Yeon avoided Tae Young-won’s eyes. Despite trying to find someone for months, he couldn’t find anyone even similar. Each time, he felt like he was struggling alone, abandoned in a vast ocean.
So meeting Tae Young-won at school had actually been incredibly fortunate.
Honestly, he didn’t think there would be a second stroke of luck for him. He didn’t even want to try finding it anymore.
After hesitating briefly, Mo Yeon suddenly looked up, realizing too late that quite some time had passed while avoiding Tae Young-won’s gaze.
“So you simply liked me because I was the first person like this for you, as you said before. That means you’ll look for a second or third person.”
“Stop it! What does that matter to you, sunbae?”
His head felt like it would explode trying to figure out how to appease him. Just then, Tae Young-won’s head turned sharply.
“…”
He remained on edge, wary of anyone passing by. Showing such a cold face at school was something completely uncharacteristic of the usual Tae Young-won.
“Don’t do that.”
Fearing he might do something crazy again like before, Mo Yeon tightened his grip on his arm. As Mo Yeon’s arm moved, Tae Young-won looked down at his hand blankly. He couldn’t shake off Mo Yeon’s hand.
“If this hurts your pride, I’ve never met anyone like you before anyway. No matter how many people I touch, I’ve never felt anything similar. That’s why I kept enduring it even when you made me angry and annoyed me.”
“…”
“I won’t switch right away. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t. Finding a second or third person isn’t easy. So don’t worry.”
“So for you.”
He paused for a moment. Their eyes met and wavered. Mo Yeon suddenly wondered if he had ever seen Tae Young-won’s eyes waver like this before.
“Is seeing those things better than being with me?”
“…”
“Hiding your face behind those pathetic glasses every day, running away, then falling down, crying… You’d rather go back to living like that, whether people think you’re strange or not?”
Somehow, hearing those words made Mo Yeon’s breath catch.
“So back then, you got caught following me around because you wanted to live that way. Thinking about it that way made me feel so sorry for you since last night, and even now I feel like I’m dying from pity.”
“…”
“I want to hug you right now regardless of who’s watching, but I’m barely holding myself back.”
His eyes, which had been glaring throughout Tae Young-won’s speech, blinked very slowly. Mo Yeon spoke quietly.
“Who asked for a hug? I don’t need that.”
“What do you want me to do? I’m saying I want to hug you.”
“…”
His eyes were gradually growing hot. Tae Young-won moved closer, pressing his body nearer. Thanks to that, Mo Yeon was completely shielded, preventing others from seeing his reddened eyes.
“I feel like I’ve been tormenting you all this time without knowing that, and when you say you like me, I feel relieved and happy, but I don’t know if it’s okay to feel this way.”
“You’ve done nothing wrong, sunbae. I chose this all myself. I used you.”
“…”
“So I’m being punished.”
Mo Yeon was telling Tae Young-won that liking him was his punishment. He thought it wouldn’t be pleasant for Tae Young-won to hear, but his reaction was even worse than expected. Mo Yeon couldn’t understand why he looked so desperate.
“Will you really go back? Because being with me is more painful?”
“I didn’t confess asking you to date me. Don’t even think about dating me out of pity. I don’t suit you anyway.”
“…”
“And… just because I haven’t found anyone else yet doesn’t mean I never will.”
A second or third person, he meant. After adding those words, Mo Yeon bit his lip.
In truth, he had given up on finding another source of yang energy. He was completely exhausted. Now he just wanted to return to the life that suited him. He realized it was impossible for him to continue being together while knowing his feelings wouldn’t be returned.
His previous life simply suited him much better.
“…Shit, never thought I’d live to hear someone say they want to replace someone like me.”
Mo Yeon stubbornly maintained eye contact with Tae Young-won. Tae Young-won raised the corner of his mouth slightly, but he didn’t look very happy. Mo Yeon spoke quietly.
“Then is there another way?”
Not everyone could handle unrequited love. It would be especially impossible for someone like him, with no lovable qualities and a prickly personality.
Still, what Tae Young-won had just said was truly unexpected. He had genuinely felt sorry for Mo Yeon. He remembered everything, even the past Mo Yeon thought he’d forgotten by now, and expressed sympathy.
He hadn’t run away immediately after hearing about seeing ghosts. Tae Young-won’s expression just now suggested that if Mo Yeon asked him to date because of his circumstances, he would do it.
This from Tae Young-won, who had said he didn’t understand why people date at all. Someone who seemed like he would never do such a thing.
Mo Yeon had no intention of doing that, but it gave him some comfort. As Tae Young-won said, the bond between them wasn’t entirely an illusion.
“It’s not charity dating out of pity, and I don’t have to endure…”
“…”
“Is there such a way for us?”
After waiting for a moment, his tears had dried up. Returning to his usual cold expression, Mo Yeon said coldly.
“There isn’t.”
That was a truth they both knew.
Another way? How could there be such a thing for them?
Until the moment Mo Yeon turned away, Tae Young-won ultimately couldn’t say anything.
***
‘Is there such a way for us?’
Tae Young-won pondered those words carefully. It felt like facing a very serious challenge.
“…As if I’m doing this out of pity.”
As he muttered, he frowned. His voice and expression seemed somewhat hurt.
Honestly, if Tae Young-won were to count the times he felt hurt by Mo Yeon, there would be many instances. Whenever he sensed Mo Yeon distancing himself for no apparent reason, he felt terrible and even obsessive.
That was a truth he couldn’t tell anyone, not even Mo Yeon, who he thought knew his bare face completely.
Another way?
‘What exactly is this other way?’
Though it seemed like the most difficult challenge in the world to Tae Young-won, he didn’t want to let Mo Yeon go.
After all, no sane person in the world would feel comfortable releasing a cat that sees ghosts into the outside world.
