Bombshell Statement (1)
***
All the way home, I couldn’t escape the shock.
I had spent my whole life running from ghosts, thinking if only they would stop appearing, my life would be easier. But now that it had become reality, it felt strange rather than good.
I wasn’t jumping with joy or feeling dreamlike happiness. I just felt somewhat dazed.
Even when returning home and immediately throwing open the windows, the streets were perfectly clean. The only thing Mo Yeon had to be wary of on tonight’s streets was just one drunk person he had briefly encountered.
“…Since when?”
No matter how much I thought about it, I couldn’t figure out the answer.
I couldn’t tell exactly when they had stopped being visible.
Thinking carefully, it hadn’t happened just a day or two ago. Rather, it seemed like it had been this way for quite some time. I had only thought that the harassment had significantly decreased. After all, during the break, I had been practically inseparable from Tae Young-won.
Even during the week when things were distant with Tae Young-won, I hadn’t seen anything resembling a ghost, but I hadn’t found that strange either. Although I had said I wouldn’t settle for this reality and would find a substitute, I had gotten so used to a life without threats that I didn’t even notice they weren’t visible anymore.
How could this happen? And why now of all times?
The reason I couldn’t be completely happy was probably because I knew it wouldn’t last.
This too was entirely Tae Young-won’s influence.
Ironically, I confirmed that I could live like normal people right after Tae Young-won left. Now that it was completely over, I felt like ghosts would reappear before my eyes at any moment.
Still, at least I learned there was a way. That alone was fortunate.
“…Just go.”
I don’t need someone who dislikes me. Mo Yeon bit his lip as he stared at the quiet view outside the window.
The issue that only Mo Yeon had found strange was now felt by both of them.
Originally, Tae Young-won had said they should return to a relationship without unnecessary emotions, but then why make such a fuss about smoking with someone else? Why look at me with that face as if you’d caught someone cheating?
Being someone who kept many secrets, Mo Yeon hadn’t fully considered it, but looking back, Tae Young-won had been acting strange for a while too. Just due to ignorance about such matters, Mo Yeon had let it slide with uncertainty.
“……”
The hand holding the curtain was still cold. A moment later, the dropped hand clenched into a fist.
Still.
I thought… he considered me somewhat precious.
I bluffed by asking if it would be okay to go back to Kim Hyun-soo, but it didn’t work at all. It’s truly childish, but that fact still felt frustrating and resentful.
The fact that Tae Young-won turned away despite those words felt like he no longer cared what Mo Yeon did afterward. Even though he said he thought of me as a cherished younger brother, that I was different from others.
He even said strange things like I was his cat…
‘If you were going to abandon me when I didn’t listen, why pretend I was special.’
It was truly over now.
Although Tae Young-won said he would think about it again, to Mo Yeon it sounded like he was ending things. Since Mo Yeon had never seen Tae Young-won make such a face before, he was certain it was over. By now, Tae Young-won probably couldn’t stand the sight of his face.
For someone with such strong pride, it was practically a miracle that he had tolerated Mo Yeon’s complaints until now.
Lately, Mo Yeon thought it was becoming unbearably difficult. Maybe it was for the best. After all, there had never been anyone else in his life anyway.
It was already very late. He had drunk a little, argued, and Mo Yeon was very tired. Without even washing his body that smelled of cigarettes he didn’t smoke, he went straight to bed and fell asleep.
When he woke up, he suddenly felt disgusted by his hands that had been touched by several people’s fingertips, so he washed his hands and body.
The sky visible through the open curtains in the living room had brightened, but he didn’t feel like eating. Even knowing it was a school day, he didn’t want to go out.
He went back to sleep, woke up and showered again. After finishing his third shower in a day, Mo Yeon pulled back the curtains.
He hadn’t looked at the clock since coming home. Mo Yeon stood by the window and looked outside.
It was dark again, perhaps night had fallen, but the view outside was clean today too.
The day after realizing ghosts were no longer visible, Mo Yeon’s world looked exactly like yesterday. It remained quiet and ordinary.
Just like what normal people could see, that’s how it appeared to Mo Yeon too.
“……”
Looking at the scenery he had so desperately wanted to see, Mo Yeon wiped his wet eyes.
The next day, he left home in time for class.
He found and wore the broken glasses he hadn’t thrown away, and there was a reason for that.
Upon arriving at school, he immediately checked on Tae Young-won’s whereabouts, but it seemed he hadn’t come to school, just as Mo Yeon hadn’t yesterday.
His phone was nowhere to be seen, perhaps left at the bar two days ago. Because of this, since it wasn’t a day when their classes overlapped, there was only one way to find out where Tae Young-won was.
“Excuse me, sunbae.”
“Oh? Hi Yeon, what brings you here?”
That method was, of course, asking Han Chae-yeon, Tae Young-won’s friend. She was the only person at school that Mo Yeon could approach somewhat easily. Most people would be startled and wary when Mo Yeon approached them, but Han Chae-yeon wasn’t like that.
“Hello. Have you seen sunbae today?”
“Young-won? He went back to his family home.”
“……”
“Huh? What’s this. Didn’t you hear?”
Of course he hadn’t heard. They were about to break up anyway.
Since yesterday, Mo Yeon had been accepting the breakup in his own way. More accurately, he was preparing for it.
Right afterward, resentment was strongest, but now he could understand. There was no reason why Tae Young-won should accept and tolerate all his lies and questionable situations.
No matter how kindly he treated him, Tae Young-won was just another person greatly interested in what was between his legs.
And hadn’t he emphasized multiple times that he disliked sharing whether it be objects or people? If he were in that position, Mo Yeon wouldn’t have felt good seeing that scene either.
It was essentially the only thing he had asked of Mo Yeon, so there was nothing to say if he was greatly disappointed and no longer wanted to be together. Besides, why would Tae Young-won bother with him?
So in reality, Mo Yeon had only been playing within the boundaries set by Tae Young-won.
The moment he crossed that line, he was to be abandoned.
Even the good treatment so far wasn’t something to resent. Of course, he felt resentful, but he understood it all intellectually. Tae Young-won had endured to his maximum capacity, and Mo Yeon had provoked that, losing him a bit faster. All because of searching for that damned yang energy.
He could accept it all, and it was all fine. But in return, he wanted to be clearly rejected with words.
“Well, it’s a bit awkward for me to say… but he said something came up at home and he’d be difficult to reach for a few days, so don’t look for him.”
“……”
Is this Tae Young-won’s conclusion? Is this mere thing the end?
From being the closest person, he had become someone for whom even accurate news was difficult to obtain through others.
“You really didn’t hear anything?”
It was Han Chae-yeon’s voice. Mo Yeon, who had been frozen for a while, barely came to his senses and answered.
“…No, I didn’t know.”
“Really? Maybe he forgot to contact you because he was busy.”
He urgently needed to leave. He simply couldn’t hide his bewilderment.
“But Yeon, your eyes look a bit swollen…”
“Thank you for letting me know. Goodbye.”
He didn’t know how he attended classes, but Mo Yeon successfully completed all his classes and the part-time job scheduled for the afternoon before returning home.
On the way, he checked the parking lot but Tae Young-won’s car wasn’t visible.
Despite not seeing ghosts, since yesterday, he had felt gloomy around midnight. Nevertheless, Mo Yeon couldn’t leave the window. Because looking outside fearlessly in the middle of the night was a very unusual thing.
Even now, he could vividly imagine what scene might be unfolding out there. Having seen them all his life, he could picture the scenery clearly just by closing his eyes.
Moreover, with Tae Young-won away from home, there would certainly be two or three attached to the place. Knowing this, looking outside wasn’t entirely pleasant.
But somehow it was hard to take his eyes away, wondering if perhaps Tae Young-won might return. It didn’t seem like anything would change whether he came or not, but he felt that way anyway.
And who knows if Tae Young-won might have already come with someone else in his car.
“……”
Upon reaching that thought, Mo Yeon’s eyes narrowed subtly. Just then, a faint car headlight appeared.
“This is pathetic. Getting obsessed like this after being dumped for your own mistake is really pathetic and awful.”
Not to mention creepy. Even while muttering, Mo Yeon unconsciously stared at the light approaching the house.
After all, Mo Yeon had been a stalker. Which meant he didn’t easily feel pangs of conscience in this area. Rather, he wanted to confirm with his own eyes.
In fact, if Tae Young-won brought a new sex partner, Mo Yeon felt he could sort out his feelings more easily. Thinking this way, he almost began to anticipate it.
“……”
Just in case, he pulled the curtain to half-hide his face. His round eyes were more focused than ever before.
