[Texts]
***
Snow White
Hyung.
I should be there with you. T_T
I’ll take care of what I need to do and come right over.
Are you feeling a little better?
***
–No.
–I’m not.
***
Snow White
Does it hurt?
***
–A little.
***
Snow White
You shouldn’t be hurting, hyung.
***
–It’s because of you.
***
Snow White
Me?
I was gentle, though.
Very, very careful.
***
–What are you talking about?
–You mercilessly
–picked me up like I weighed nothing…
–You’ve got some nerve.
***
Snow White
Cute Snow White has some nerve?
***
–You’re not cute.
***
Snow White
Yesterday, Snow White
was only helping hyung.
***
–If you were going to help,
–you should’ve
–stopped after the first time.
***
Snow White
I was planning to,
but hyung was the one who—
***
–Aaaaaaaahhh!
–Don’t.
–Stop.
–I must’ve lost my mind yesterday.
–I wasn’t thinking straight.
***
Snow White
Hmm.
Hyung.
***
–What?
***
Snow White
Did I…
rape you, hyung?
If that’s what happened, tell me.
***
–What if I said yes?
***
Snow White
Then I’d have to turn myself in.
***
–Are you insane?!
***
Snow White
?
If you’ve committed a crime, you should be punished.
***
–No.
–;;
–It’s not like that…
***
Snow White
Right?
***
–Yeah…
–It was consensual.
–You asked me over and over again.
–About what I said just now… sorry.
–I was just complaining.
***
Snow White
I know.
Those ghost bastards messed with you somehow.
You were unusually worked up,
and I was only going to help you with my hand…
What happened after that
was something we both consented to, driven by our instincts and sexual desire.
***
–…
–I was the one who’d lost my mind.
***
Snow White
Haha.
***
–Um…
***
Snow White
Yes?
***
–Well…
–Um…
–It’s…
***
Snow White
How much longer am I supposed to wait for you to say it, hyung?
It’s already been over five minutes.
***
–No, it’s just…
***
Snow White
Is it really that hard
to ask whether I like you?
***
–…
–You…
–How are you
–so confident
–about it?
***
Snow White
Is it something to be embarrassed about instead?
That I like you?
***
–No…
–It’s not that.
***
Snow White
Then?
***
–…
–Listen…
–Don’t like me.
–I might never be able to forget him…
–Taeyoung.
–Even after everything that happened yesterday, I’m still so confused.
–Even now,
–I still feel
–a huge sense of betrayal.
–And what happened with you…
–I think I did it partly out of anger.
***
Snow White
I know.
I know you’ll never really forget Kim Taeyoung.
***
–?
–If you knew, then why… ;;
***
Snow White
Because I don’t really mind.
***
–Yesterday…
–When I called Taeyoung’s name…
–you got angry.
***
Snow White
Well, if you’re in bed with me and call Kim Taeyoung’s name,
even if I’m very broad-minded, that’s a bit much. lol
Don’t you think?
***
–Sorry…
–I didn’t mean to say it.
–For a moment, I really thought I saw his face.
***
Snow White
There were protective talismans all over the place.
You must’ve imagined it.
Especially if you saw him in the bedroom instead of the bathroom.
That room was practically covered in protective talismans.
***
–Yeah…
***
Snow White
And, hyung,
I wasn’t angry.
***
–You just got over it quickly.
–You were angry.
***
Snow White
That doesn’t even count as getting angry.
***
–It was terrifying…
***
Snow White
Terrifying?
You liked what came after even more.
***
–Ah.
–Ugh.
***
Snow White
Haha.
Hyung,
do you know you’re really innocent?
***
–;;;
–What are you talking about?
***
Snow White
You’re kind, innocent,
and you’re handsome too.
You’re exactly the type who’d get taken advantage of or have his life ruined.
***
–Are you insulting me?
***
Snow White
Nope. Just stating facts.
The reason you’ve stayed the same all the way to this age
is thanks to Kim Taeyoung.
***
–…
***
Snow White
You were together for that long,
and lived together for over ten years too, right?
***
–Yeah.
–Ever since we were twenty…
***
Snow White
Right.
The hyung I met had already been dating Kim Taeyoung for over ten years. lol
Someone who’s had that much influence on you, one way or another—did you think I’d try to cut every trace of Kim Taeyoung out of you?
That would be the same as telling you to deny your own past. It’s already a past that can’t be changed.
I’m not the type to wallow miserably over things that can never be changed.
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous at all. lol
The reason you’re so innocent and adorable is probably partly because of Kim Taeyoung too.
I have no intention of denying that.
Personally, I just wish you’d realize how handsome and amazing you are. lol
I like you just the way you are.
***
–…
–Even if you’re okay with it,
–it still doesn’t sit right with me.
***
Snow White
Why?
***
–It can’t be good
–if things stay like this forever.
–I might never come to like you.
***
Snow White
Hmm… I don’t know.
Judging by yesterday,
you seemed to like me an awful lot.
***
–Aaaahhhhhhh!
***
Snow White
Our bodies—
***
–Aaaahhhhhhhhh!!
***
Snow White
—fit together well.
***
–Stop.
***
Snow White
Don’t want to. lol
***
–;;
***
Snow White
It’s okay.
I’m fine with things staying like this.
Hyung,
setting everything else aside,
right now,
I just want to help you.
***
–Well…
***
Snow White
I’m not asking you to dig Kim Taeyoung out of your heart and replace him with me, am I?
If you keep seeing me, eventually you’ll come to like me too.
Later, you’ll like me as much as Kim Taeyoung—
No, even more than him.
***
–What…
–Why are you so sure?
***
Snow White
Right now,
you don’t need to think about me.
***
–No.
–How can I not?
***
Snow White
Haha.
Our relationship isn’t what’s important right now anyway.
Let’s deal with what’s happening to you first.
***
–;;
–No… I don’t think this is right.
***
Snow White
What isn’t?
***
–Knowing perfectly well that you like me,
–how can I accept your help?
–It’s like I’d be leading you on.
***
Snow White
Heh.
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
***
–What? ;;
***
Snow White
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLL
No, it’s just so funny…
and cute. LOLLLLLLLLL
Leading me on… hmm.
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
Ah.
Out of everything you’ve ever said, that might be the funniest.
***
–=.=
***
Snow White
Seriously.
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
***
–Stop laughing.
***
Snow White
You? Leading me on?
Go ahead.
Now I’m curious.
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
***
–If you keep laughing,
–I’m locking the door when I get home.
***
Snow White
Snow White’s lips are officially sealed.
***
–You’re awful.
–You tease me, then immediately act cute.
***
Snow White
Haha.
Hyung, don’t worry about pointless things.
Even if you tried to lead someone on, you’d only manage to catch minnows in a little creek….
***
–What does that even mean? ;;
***
Snow White
It means you’d be terrible at it. lol
You really worry about the strangest things.
You’re adorable.
***
–;;
–But I can’t let myself burden you this much.
***
Snow White
It’s fine.
And what are you planning to do all by yourself?
You haven’t forgotten, have you?
I don’t want to remind you,
but if I hadn’t been there last night,
you would’ve been in real danger.
***
–I know…
–But…
***
Snow White
Just accept the help. lol
Before I decide to lock you up instead.
***
–;;
***
Snow White
You don’t want to turn the person who saved you
into a criminal who kidnaps and imprisons people, do you?
***
–What on earth are you talking about?
–How did your logic make a jump there?
***
Snow White
Haha.
***
–Fine. ;;
–But don’t make jokes that extreme either…
–If you say things like that somewhere else, people will misunderstand.
***
Snow White
“Either”?
***
–Ah.
***
Snow White
Did Kim Taeyoung say he wanted to lock you up?
***
–No, he was only joking.
–But every now and then he’d say some pretty scary things.
***
Snow White
Like what, for example?
***
–I’d rather not talk about things that were just between us.
–Um…
–Just… all kinds of things…
***
Snow White
?
***
–No, it’s just…
–Thinking about it now…
–Maybe I really am dense…
–In the end, what you and Taeyoung said about Gitae was right.
–He got frustrated with me and blew up more than once too…
–He was pretty jealous.
–Looking back, maybe it was all my fault after all.
***
Snow White
Jealousy, huh.
That’s Kim Taeyoung’s issue.
It’s not your fault, hyung.
***
–Who knows…
–Maybe he really did want me dead.
–…
–I’m scared.
–And I feel sorry for you too.
–You got dragged into all this because of me.
***
Snow White
I’m fine.
Hyung…
Are you okay?
***
–I don’t know…
–I’m confused.
–Gitae is one thing,
–but I never imagined Taeyoung would be like this.
–I wish what I saw yesterday hadn’t been Taeyoung.
–…
–But it was Taeyoung.
***
Snow White
But not the Kim Taeyoung who was alive.
The shaman said
that ghosts become obsessed with whatever they were most attached to while they were alive, or at the moment they died.
So Kim Taeyoung too…
the feelings he had toward you…
that obsession…
might’ve become more extreme.
***
–I hope that’s not the case.
***
Snow White
If he hasn’t become something like an evil spirit yet,
they said he’ll be okay if he’s helped to pass on peacefully.
Song Gitae is the exception, though.
***
–Gitae…
–…
–Why would he do something like that to me?
–I honestly thought we were friends.
–I was only ever good to him.
–Was it really my fault…?
***
Snow White
That fucking bastard was just a worthless piece of shit.
You didn’t do anything wrong, hyung.
If that bastard were still alive,
I’d bury him alive myself.
***
–Don’t say things like that.
–When you say it, it somehow feels…
***
Snow White
Like I’d actually do it?
I really would’ve. lol
***
–I said don’t.
–You’re scaring me.
***
Snow White
Hyung…
Am I cute?
***
–?
–What’s with that all of a sudden?
***
Snow White
I’m not scary, right?
***
–Why would you be scary?
***
Snow White
Well…
I just wanted to make sure.
***
–You’re not scary.
–I wasn’t being serious.
–Why would it be scary when you’re helping me?
–Although… yesterday, when you got angry while holding that baseball bat… that was pretty terrifying.
***
Snow White
Hmm.
***
–But that just made you seem dependable.
–So don’t worry.
–You looked cool.
***
Snow White
Haha.
Really?
Hyung might actually be capable of leading people on after all….
***
–What?
–I don’t do that. ;;
–You were the one who said someone like me could never pull that off….
***
Snow White
Come on, when did I ever go that far?
Since hyung trusts Snow White,
Snow White is just melting right now….
***
–Of course I trust you.
–I do.
***
Snow White
You’re such a warm person in so many ways, hyung.
Yesterday too…
You’ve got a pretty face,
and you’re just as kind.
***
–H-hey.
–Why are you saying things like that…?
***
Snow White
Is it weird?
***
–A little. ;;
–Why do you keep saying such strange things?
***
Snow White
Because, obviously,
I have to win you over.
***
–You said I didn’t have to think about that right now. ;;
***
Snow White
You not reaching a conclusion right away
and me trying to win you over
are two completely separate things.
By the time you’ve sorted out your feelings,
I want you to be ready to start dating me immediately.
So I have to win you over in advance.
***
–No, seriously.
–Where is all this confidence coming from?
–What makes you so sure I’ll fall for you?
–Do I look that easy?
***
Snow White
No.
I’m just that much of a catch.
***
–;;
***
Snow White
Snow White is handsome,
has a great body,
a big dick,
is good at sex,
has plenty of money,
is gentle,
considerate,
cute,
and lovable.
***
–I don’t think that last one belongs on the list.
***
Snow White
So the rest are true?
Hyung.
Heesoo hyung.
Why’d you go quiet?
***
–I’m going to sleep.
***
Snow White
LOL.
So that means the rest are true, right??
***
–I’m sleeping.
–ZZZ.
***
Snow White
LOLLLL.
Okay.
Sleep well.
***
First Email
Heesoo, please read this.
Monday, September 9, 20xx, 2:22 PM
From: Kim Taeyoung | To: Lee Heesoo
Hi, Heesoo.
Look into the Church of Heavenly Truth and Ha-neul. You’ll find something.
I don’t think I’ve sent you an email since we were in college…
To be honest, I went back and forth over this… Whether I should tell you or not.
Heesoo. You used to tell me you’d love only me for the rest of your life. Every single time I got anxious, you’d say it. You’d tell me not to worry. So was that promise only valid while I was alive? Did it expire the moment I died?
If I’d known it would turn out like this, I would’ve locked you up a long time ago and turned you into an idiot who knew nothing but me.
If I’d done that, once I died, you would’ve followed me on your own a long time ago. Do I sound strange? Do you think I’m acting like this because I died and went insane?
No.
I’d already been crazy about you long before I died. You really had no idea?
Come on. Even you’re not that oblivious.
Do you know why Song Gitae died? Because I did that. I told him that you talked behind his back. That the filthy, stinking otaku bastard had mistaken your kindness—that you were only being nice because of your homeroom teacher—and, not knowing his place, thought he actually had a chance with you.
I do feel responsible. Maybe I should’ve gotten rid of him in a less extreme way. I hated that bastard for touching you…but I hated Song Gitae—that filthy bastard—touching you even more.
That’s why I’m telling you this.
Ask for help. And stay away from him.
Come with me, Heesoo. You don’t have anyone but me anyway.
What’s the point of living by yourself?
Your family is trash, and even your so-called friends were really just my friends.
You have no one.
Stay with me, Heesoo. I love you.
***
