#13
“Young Master.”
“Yeah?”
“Do you want to win?”
With both hands placed on her thighs, Kara spoke quietly. The stream of light pouring from the fully drawn curtains illuminated her face, making her look more serious.
I did want to win. Who would like losing? If possible, I wanted to win. However, I knew that human affairs don’t go as one wishes.
“Why do you want to win?”
Kara asked me again without even listening to my answer.
“Is His Highness that important to you?”
Somehow I was reminded of what the Duke had asked me in the carriage – whether Persis was important to me. At that time, I had clearly answered yes. Even though she had heard my answer right beside me, why was she asking me again?
“Is it such a big deal that I think His Highness is important? His Grace and Kara both keep asking me about it.”
Kara couldn’t give any answer to my question. She looked just like I had moments before. I too hadn’t provided answers to the two questions she had asked. However, Kara and I were different. Unlike me, who couldn’t answer because I missed the timing, Kara deliberately kept her mouth shut.
Kara had never avoided my questions before. She taught me every little thing and waited until I understood. That same woman was avoiding my question for the first time.
“Kara?”
“It’s not a big deal.”
After taking one deep breath, she spoke to me very lightly. However, it was already difficult to completely believe her words. Was there something between the Duke’s family and the imperial family that I didn’t know about? Once started, my suspicion only grew little by little.
The game didn’t cover their backstories. The Duke was simply a villain, and that person I loved so dearly was the protagonist who defeated the villain.
If there was a special reason why the Duke became a villain. And if I could find out that reason before the Duke accepted the demons’ power. Something might change. There was something I needed to find out besides the Duke’s garden.
Should I just lose to Rikin like this? Anyway, it was a relationship that would have to distance itself from Persis someday. Rikin had appeared too, so distancing myself now was also a method.
Even without my help, Persis would grow up well on his own. If worst came to worst, I could try to fix his mental state when we met later. I was a bit worried that Persis relied on me too much, but since he was a young child, he would gradually forget with time.
“Well then, shall we play again?”
“Huh? We’re doing it again?”
“Yes. You said you wanted to stay by His Highness’s side. Then you have to win.”
There was no need to practice like this anymore, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell Kara that my heart had changed. If I said I was going to give up, I would surely have to endure Kara’s sharp glare and indiscriminate nagging.
“And a swordsmanship teacher will be coming shortly.”
“What? Swordsmanship?”
“Yes. This time His Grace heard your story and seemed to realize something, so he ordered you to take swordsmanship lessons.”
I recalled the Duke who had sat without saying a word when we returned home by carriage yesterday. He hadn’t asked me about the duel results, nor had he reproached me for losing the duel. He had just quietly kept his mouth shut while looking for ways to give me a hard time.
I’m not Rikin, and I don’t want to hold a sword with a body that just turned seven. Clutching the game piece I was organizing tightly in my hand, I suppressed a sigh that felt like it would burst. The already insufficient time seemed to be getting even more insufficient, making me feel only despair.
* * *
The swordsmanship lesson really flew by quickly. To be precise, each minute and second felt too long when I was taking the lesson, but when it was over, I wanted to ask if an hour had already passed.
I had exhausted myself doing the basic physical training the teacher taught me and lost myself in a daze, and before I knew it, class time was over. It meant I had moved my body to the point of falling into a trance. It was truly an experience I never wanted to have again.
However, to me who was completely exhausted, the teacher left saying he’d see me next week and turned away. I can’t describe how heartless that seemed.
I wasn’t supposed to duel with Rikin in the first place. Getting carried away by Rikin’s words and falling for it. Was it because this body’s age was still young, unlike my soul? I often got swept up by emotions or thought simply.
Spending each day receiving such grueling lessons and Kara’s teachings, before I knew it, it was time to go to the palace again.
My steps boarding the carriage to the palace felt only heavy. Rikin was probably also heading to the palace.
No matter how hard I tried, I wouldn’t be able to beat Rikin. Of course, losing to him wouldn’t immediately cost me my qualification as Persis’s playmate, but my position would become precarious. It would be a very good excuse for the palace employees who wanted to separate me from Persis’s side. Although Persis had rejected Rikin, the palace people would think of it as a momentary childish whim.
Let me empty my heart. I already knew I was going to lose anyway. Struggling more here would all be in vain.
With that resolve, I arrived at the palace. Guided by the employees, I headed to the reception room where I could meet Persis. There was no one inside yet. Had Rikin not arrived? As I stood near the door looking around, I heard the sound of the door behind me opening.
When I turned my head, Persis with reddened eyes was entering with the employees. Why does he look like that again? As soon as he saw me, moisture welled up in Persis’s eyes. I don’t know what happened to make him want to cry like this again.
Persis didn’t rush to me as usual. He just walked over quietly and held out his hand to me. He looked like someone hoping I would take that hand first.
“Your Highness? Are you alright?”
When I spoke gently, tears that had been pooled in Persis’s eyes, who had been standing apart from me, rolled down. The moment I saw that sight, I couldn’t wait for him to approach me first.
I firmly grasped Persis’s small hand stretched toward me and pulled him over, embracing the small child fully in my arms. Without even receiving permission, touching a member of the royal family first was a great disrespect. I could hear the employees around us drawing sharp breaths.
In other times, I wouldn’t have done this. I knew well that it was such a dangerous thing to do. Even so, I absolutely couldn’t just stand still.
As soon as he was in my arms, Persis began to sob and cry out loud like a pitiful child. The employees who had been about to separate me from him didn’t know what to do and floundered around us.
What had the employees been doing while the child got to this state? I could only glare at them with fierce eyes. This is why I don’t want to leave Persis’s side.
“Hic. Ugh. I, I. Endured it.”
Persis spoke with a voice mixed with tears.
“Ana, I wanted to see you but I endured it. *sob* I wanted, wanted to see you so much.”
“Your Highness.”
“In my dream, Ana went away. Far away.”
The words the small child spoke pierced into me.
“But, but, I endured it.”
The child who had been in my arms pulled his face away and looked at me with a bright smile. He hadn’t even stopped crying completely, but I don’t know what was so good that he was smiling like that.
“I did well, right!”
Seeing that face hoping for praise, I couldn’t say anything.
It’s because of me. The child’s pitiful crying, enduring through difficult dreams all night, not even being able to say he missed me – it’s all because of me. Because I told him not to do that, the child didn’t throw even one small tantrum. Then the moment he saw my face, everything burst out.
I knew that I had become an important person to Persis. I just thought he followed me and listened carefully to every word I said. I didn’t know Persis would suffer because of me.
The palace employees had reason to hate me. A child who was only seven years old thought my words were more important than his own desires. My existence was dangerous. Right now it was just not being stubborn after having a dream, but if this continued as he grew older, it would be a big problem from the employees’ perspective.
The Duke’s family with enormous power could grow even larger and threaten the imperial family. They had to separate me and Persis somehow.
“Ana?”
When I stood without saying anything, Persis’s eyes trembled. He had tried hard in his own way, but since no praise came back, he must have been scared.
My heart ached. It might be better for Persis if I stepped back as the palace employees wanted. However, thinking about how the child had suffered because of me, I absolutely couldn’t let go of this hand.
I had definitely intended to give up on the match until I came to the palace, but facing Persis, such thoughts melted away like snow.
“You did well.”
There’s no choice. I’ll use every trick and struggle once. No matter how much of a genius Rikin is, he’s still a seven-year-old child. If worst comes to worst, I could gently scratch his pride and disturb his reasoning.
Persis pressed his lips tightly together and endured his rising emotions. However, because of his lips curving up to the sky, he couldn’t hide his good mood. He could say he’s happy if he’s happy, but I don’t know why he’s enduring even such small emotions. Is this also because of me?
“You can say you’re happy if you’re happy.”
I gently pulled Persis’s hand that I was holding and spoke to him. Then the child opened his mouth wide and nodded greatly.
“I’m happy! I like Ana!”
That wasn’t what I meant, but Persis shouted several times that he liked me while shaking our clasped hands.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
