Ressas, who used to light up just by seeing Seiyad, was nowhere to be found. The subtle signs of excitement that had always betrayed his fondness—no matter how hard he tried to hide it—were also completely gone.
He looked… completely indifferent. As if he’d merely run into someone he knew.
The change was so jarring that Seiyad, in his audacity, forgot to respond. Thinking it might be a fleeting illusion, he blinked, but Ressas’s expression remained the same. After waiting briefly for Seiyad to say something, Ressas slowly turned to Kirill and spoke.
“If His Grace intends to stay here, then I’ll take my leave. I’ve already paid my dues, so rest as long as you need.”
“Not at all, Your Highness. We couldn’t possibly let you do that.”
Kirill, recalling the previous winter when Ressas had visited the Axid estate, knew who he was. Flustered, he looked to Seiyad, searching his expression for guidance. Seeing Kirill wait for his decision, Seiyad snapped back to himself.
“…I wasn’t informed that Your Highness would be coming here.”
Hoping that saying something—anything—might provoke a reaction, he forced out the words. But Ressas replied in the same calm tone, unchanged.
“I was heading straight for the Vetria estate. I planned to send word once I arrived. It seemed like time to survey the eastern woods. I’ll find another place to stay for the night, so you can rest here, Your Grace.”
It had been far too long since he’d last seen him.
Questions began surfacing—belated and tangled. Had he been doing well? What had he been up to all this time? Had he been so busy that the thought of visiting never even occurred to him? Had anything happened? Seiyad realized it had been so long since he’d asked such tender questions of anyone.
And now that he’d finally remembered how to, all that remained was to ask. Yet the one person he wanted to speak to gave him not even a sliver of space for idle conversation.
“Your Highness.”
‘Why are you treating me this way?’
He wanted to ask, but the words caught in his throat. And then, belatedly, an answer surfaced in his mind. Because he’s only following through on what I asked of him. Even as the thought formed, anxiety welled up inside—because just a few months ago, Ressas hadn’t acted like this.
Ressas behaved now as if he no longer liked him. As if he were no longer the man who would do anything for him.
“Yes, Your Grace.”
Ressas’s response to Seiyad’s call was soft and courteous. His willingness to yield the room he’d secured for himself, the way he answered when spoken to—any outsider would’ve called it kind. But in Seiyad’s eyes, all he could see was how different it was from before.
Normally, his expression would’ve changed the moment he saw him. A simple “How have you been?” wouldn’t have sufficed—he would’ve watched him closely, desperate to reach out. He wouldn’t have turned his gaze away so easily, either.
‘Since when did it become so painful that Ressas no longer wants me so desperately?’
Seiyad realized he wanted the warm, affectionate version of Ressas far more than he’d admitted to himself. It made the years they’d spent at odds—bitter and antagonistic—seem almost laughable now. He’d grown used to the tender way Ressas treated him, despite the friction. Used to how he’d approach again and again, even after being pushed away, always getting hurt but still coming closer.
His heart lurched. Just facing him like this was almost unbearable. A part of him wanted to retreat, to feign indifference as well.
But that desire was dwarfed by something stronger—the need to hold onto Ressas and talk to him. More than his pride, he wanted time with Ressas, now that they were finally face-to-face again. That was what Seiyad truly wanted.
Having made up his mind, Seiyad studied Ressas, who waited calmly, then opened his mouth.
“This is the only lodging in the area. It’s a small village—there’s not even a house big enough to accommodate all your knights. Please stay here with me.”
“I appreciate Your Grace’s hospitality, but the inn is too small. It would be difficult to arrange rooms for everyone.”
Ressas turned down Seiyad’s offer politely. His insistence on leaving, despite Seiyad making such an effort, only stirred Seiyad’s stubbornness further.
He had no idea why Ressas had changed so suddenly—but he trusted that there must be a reason.
Over the past few months of watching him closely, Seiyad had come to believe in Ressas’s heart. Unlike what he’d always assumed, he now knew that Ressas had constantly been aware of him. And even now—despite appearances—he was certain Ressas still cared for him.
And so, Seiyad chose to trust in that heart and act accordingly. If only to finally put a name to this emotion that had tormented him for months.
“If we’re determined to stay, there’s always a way. If it’s all right with Your Highness, you and I can share a room, and the knights can be grouped together. Wouldn’t that solve the problem?”
Seiyad proposed sharing a room as if it were nothing at all. Ressas’s lips parted slightly in surprise. A flicker of confusion passed across his face before he firmly declined.
“I wouldn’t want to inconvenience Your Grace.”
“You, Your Highness, are the kingdom’s sacred light and guide. How could I possibly feel inconvenienced? I haven’t undergone Purification in months—this would be the perfect chance.”
Truthfully, he hadn’t used his powers to the point of exhaustion—at most, the usual headaches had returned. But Seiyad lied and claimed he needed Purification. Even as he felt a twinge of shame for using his pain as an excuse, he pressed on.
“Or… perhaps it’s me that makes you uncomfortable? Considering the rumors about the northern Duke being some sort of monster, I wouldn’t blame you.”
Believing that Ressas didn’t truly dislike him, Seiyad deliberately said something so absurd. And in that instant, Ressas’s expression changed completely.
“Who said such nonsense? Everyone knows by now that you’re nothing of the sort.”
His voice carried the weight of someone who might track down the very person who’d spread those rumors. Seeing that stern expression settle on his now more mature face, Seiyad’s chest twisted with sudden disarray. A wave of relief washed over him—it felt like he had just uncovered proof that Ressas still cared.
“Your Highness must know better than anyone how old reputations don’t fade easily. But if sharing a room is too unpleasant because of my presence, I’ll step aside.”
“That’s not it.”
Ressas interrupted before Seiyad could finish. A trace of unease flitted across his composed brow before vanishing.
“…Very well, Your Grace. If you insist, I’ll impose for just one night.”
Having gotten what he wanted, Seiyad didn’t waste a second before giving orders to Kirill and the knights.
“Assess the rooms and assign them so everyone can stay. I’ll tend to His Highness myself, so don’t concern yourselves.”
“Understood, Your Grace.”
Kirill bowed in obedience, and the unfamiliar knights with Ressas stared at Seiyad with curious eyes before bowing as well under Kirill’s lead. Their auras were strikingly clean, each of them radiating a clarity that set them apart from the usual royal knights. It sparked Seiyad’s curiosity.
Normally, he would’ve brought Vine or Rigda along.
While Seiyad examined the knights, trying to assess who they were, Ressas spoke again, wrapping up the situation.
“Do as His Grace says. The Vetria duchy is close by—there’s no harm in sleeping in a bit tomorrow.”
After ordering his knights to disperse, Ressas turned back to Seiyad.
“You should rest, Your Grace. I have something to take care of.”
Without even giving Seiyad a chance to respond, Ressas stepped out of the inn. The intention to avoid him was obvious, and unwilling to let him get away, Seiyad pursued. Like a predator tracking prey, he moved silently after him. As Ressas stepped into the small nearby forest just beyond the inn, he abruptly stopped. Turning back, he spotted Seiyad perfectly, even though he was hidden beneath the stretching shadows of the setting sun.
“Your Grace, there’s no need to follow.”
He’d noticed before—Ressas could detect Seiyad’s presence with uncanny precision, something even other Tithers struggled to do. With a frown of dissatisfaction, Seiyad stepped out and walked toward him.
“How is it that Your Highness always knows I’m there?”
“…It’s just a feeling. I can’t explain it. If that answers your question, then please go back.”
“Leaving a member of the royal family alone would be an unforgivable offense. As a Tither, it’s also my duty to protect you.”
“Your Grace, I…”
Ressas bit his lip, as if struggling to explain. Seeing that familiar habit resurface made Seiyad slowly step closer. Carefully closing the distance so he wouldn’t be pushed away, he only stopped when Ressas made no move to retreat.
They stood in silence for a while. The sinking sun cast a crimson hue across the sky, and the dying wind of oncoming night drifted softly between them. Seiyad watched as Ressas’s fine hair stirred, then settled, and reached out gently.
“You’re biting your lip again.”
A pale hand stretched out, close enough to touch the reddened lips. Ressas’s gaze followed the movement of his fingers. His long lashes remained still, unmoving—until Seiyad’s fingers brushed his lips. Then, he turned his face away. At a glance, it looked like rejection. But if one looked closer, they could see his throat trembling under that sharply defined jawline.
“It’s dangerous at night. Please return inside, Your Grace.”
“Why won’t you say my name?”
It was a question Ressas clearly hadn’t expected. His startled eyes met Seiyad’s briefly before darting elsewhere. The calm, collected demeanor he’d upheld since their reunion began to slowly unravel, and Seiyad took heart from that.
“Is it because of what I said last time? Is that why you’re keeping your distance?”
During all the time they couldn’t see each other, Seiyad had revisited his own foolish proposal over and over. Telling themselves it was better to keep their distance, believing they could never truly be together—logically, it made sense. But as the days passed, Seiyad realized that decision only made him more miserable. And hearing about the engagement today confirmed it.
He didn’t want Ressas’s affection going to someone else.
That blooming violet smile, the overwhelming tenderness that bordered on blind devotion—he wanted all of it directed solely at himself. He didn’t want to share the warmth of Ressas’s arms with anyone, and his sweet lips should be tasted by Seiyad and Seiyad alone.
It had been Ressas who made him stop seeing himself as a terrifying monster. Ressas, who wept at injuries Seiyad himself had brushed off as nothing. Just being around him made Seiyad feel like he was someone worth cherishing.
Of course, Seiyad now knew that his sister, his retainers—they all cared deeply for him. He understood now that the people around him had always watched over him more than he realized. But none of that changed one truth.
Seiyad wanted to be someone special to Ressas more than anyone else.
“Then allow me to take those words back, Your Highness.”
He knew well enough that rescinding his decision wasn’t the most honorable thing. But just this once, he wanted to be selfish. For once in a life filled with letting go and giving up, he would do as he pleased.
“I don’t like how you’re treating me now. I want to hear you say my name.”
Seiyad realized that whatever Ressas had hidden, whatever he had said or done—it no longer mattered. Even the cruel words, the moments that had pierced Seiyad’s heart like a blade—they were things of the past now. Maybe he believed there had been a reason for those actions. Or maybe he had just accepted that this life was different, and that it was time to stop seeing everything through the lens of what came before.
What mattered now was this moment—the present.
