53
The car that departed immediately started moving at high speed from the beginning. Taein had gotten in and roughly closed the door, so a warning sound was ringing inside the car.
“Hey, stop. I’m getting out.”
“Are you crazy? Stop here? You don’t even know the ‘un’ in ‘unjeong’ (driving), so you think you can stop anywhere.”
“…Fucking bastard, is this the time to say shit like that? You wanna die?”
“Just your face, fucking…”
While driving, Gu Wanjae suddenly turned his head and looked at Taein.
“You look so fucking plausible but your mouth is like a whore’s rag, you son of a bitch….”
“You’re describing yourself pretty well.”
“What did you say?”
“What. I said I heard your self-introduction well.”
Taein looked at Gu Wanjae with dry eyes. When their eyes met, Gu Wanjae just said “Hey, fucking bastard” and focused on driving again. Outside the road, various construction, maintenance, and unidentifiable office-like buildings could be seen. Even in the dim light, Taein read those signs while looking for timing to get out of the car. If they stopped even for a moment, he planned to get out immediately.
“……”
But the car just kept driving. It was a continuous stretch of road without even a common traffic light. Just when it seemed like the speed might decrease, an area where they had to drive swiftly would come up.
Only after more than 20 minutes passed did the speed completely slow down.
Still, he couldn’t get out.
Because the car turned right and went up a dark road.
It was an entrance leading into the big mountain that had been visible from earlier. Judging by how smooth the road was, there seemed to be tourist attractions nearby. Taein was curious about where this was, but didn’t want to speak. They had only argued the moment he got in the car, but after that, neither had said a word.
After passing the smooth section, a rough road appeared.
The car shook as it traveled that path.
And not long after, large buildings became visible.
Mountain lodge, motel, hot springs. Letters lit with tacky lighting created a similar atmosphere. Taein crossed his arms. He was annoyed that he’d come all the way here just because Wanjae had business to attend to. Even if he got out in such a dark mountain area, he would only face trouble. Of all places, did he have to have business here? If at least the streetlights were brightly lit, he would have thought “whatever happens, happens” and gotten out of the car.
Taein leaned his head back at the hiking trail information visible through the car window.
The moment his head touched the headrest with a thud, the car stopped.
Taein closed his eyes and pretended to sleep. He thought that would make him look less foolish. Gu Wanjae turned off the engine and got out immediately. Taein slightly opened his eyes to look ahead. He’d been too busy checking the sides to see what building they’d parked in front of. A building made of red brick. Above it was a large motel sign.
He could see Gu Wanjae entering that building.
Who’s staying here?
Taein stuck his head out to look up to the upper floors.
It was a taller building than expected. From a distance, it had looked like 2-story houses clustered together, but when he counted the floors, it was 6 stories high. He could see windows with lights on here and there. After observing for a while, when Taein saw Gu Wanjae coming out of the motel, he quickly leaned back against his seat again. He closed his eyes and pretended to sleep.
It seemed his business had ended faster than expected.
Gu Wanjae opened the car door with a clunk and got in, putting only his upper body inside to tap Taein.
Taein, frowning and looking to the side, met eyes with Gu Wanjae.
“…What.”
“Get out. You’re going to sleep.”
“…Sleep what.”
“Or go down by yourself. Alone.”
He smiled while saying this.
“…Ah… fuck… really….”
Taein muttered curses and followed Gu Wanjae with his eyes as he slammed the door shut.
Gu Wanjae went to the front of the car hood, looked around the area, then sent a look to Taein sitting in the passenger seat.
His mouth was saying ‘Aren’t you getting out?’
Then he started lighting a cigarette.
The day was cold.
The cigarette burned unusually fast.
After grinding the butt on the ground, Taein could see Gu Wanjae turn around and step up the motel stairs.
Taein also got out of the car then.
“Fuck.”
Taein cursed as quietly as possible and pushed through the opaque glass door to enter.
The inside of the motel was ordinary. The front desk was blocked by glass and there seemed to be a couple inside. The woman was checking the people coming in, and the man was organizing keys. Since it was a fairly old motel, they seemed to open and close doors with keys. Taein looked around there and headed toward the elevator. Gu Wanjae was waiting for him while pressing the open button.
“……”
With his eyes constantly looking elsewhere, Taein got on the elevator.
The floor where it stopped was the 5th floor. There weren’t that many rooms. The moment the elevator opened, all the rooms were visible.
Gu Wanjae went to room 505 and opened the door. He muttered something to himself, then went inside leaving the key inserted.
Taein pulled out the key and followed him in. There was a hook right next to it, so he hung the key there.
One wooden coat hanger that looked like human bones, a small refrigerator, bedding.
There was one wooden door in the hallway, so he pushed that open too.
It seemed to be the bathroom. After roughly checking just the toilet and sink, Taein withdrew his gaze.
An old but reasonably well-maintained motel.
That was the end of his assessment. Taein, who had his hands in his coat pockets, leaned his back against the wall.
There was also a TV about the size of a computer monitor inside.
Gu Wanjae, who had been kicking around with his feet, answered a phone call in the corner of the room.
“No, yes. Well, there’s a motel at the foot of the mountain here. Yes, I can do it. Yes.”
While saying this, he added words like “no” and “no sir.”
Taein lost interest in the phone conversation whose meaning or intent he couldn’t understand. Then he took off his coat and hung it on the skeletal coat hanger. Gu Wanjae had also taken off his coat and the vest he was wearing underneath. Sometimes he just wore a shirt inside, and sometimes he wore a vest like that. Looking at Gu Wanjae’s expensive-looking suit, Taein recalled the padded vest he had bought for him before. That kind of thing would probably be better.
Though Gu Wanjae did wear what he gave him well.
But what did that matter?
When they were fighting.
Leaving Gu Wanjae on his phone call, Taein headed to the bathroom. Dark-colored tiles, traces of water stains, ivory-colored sink. Overall it was a space with a cold atmosphere. The room was warm, but… the heat probably didn’t reach this far. Taein looked at the convenience items provided in front. There were disposable toothbrush, toothpaste, and even two small soaps. It was simple but a decent setup for staying one day. He could shower with soap too.
It was when he was unwrapping the toothbrush with that thought.
He heard “Kang Taein” from outside.
Taein felt strange for some reason and flung the door wide open.
“What.”
“Ah, you scared me.”
Since he suddenly opened the door, Gu Wanjae looked more startled.
“Why are you calling me?”
“Oh, what do you want to eat for dinner?”
“……”
Taein looked at Gu Wanjae with an expressionless face. In this situation, what dinner, you eat it yourself – those words rose to his throat but didn’t come out of his mouth. He wasn’t full enough to express such boldness. Rather, he was hungry enough for his stomach to growl. A little omelet rice and a few sips of alcohol were all he’d had for dinner. Taein quietly looked at Gu Wanjae’s face for a while, then opened his mouth slightly.
“…What’s the menu?”
“Tteokgalbi or kalguksu. We could eat black pork too.”
“……”
“But tteokgalbi is the closest.”
It seemed like he meant he’d go buy it. After keeping his mouth shut, Taein supported that opinion.
“Then buy it from somewhere close.”
Taein said only that and immediately closed the door. He’d opened it quickly because he thought Gu Wanjae might misunderstand for no reason. At some point, Taein had become unable to use the bathroom comfortably when Gu Wanjae was around. He came out as quickly as possible, and it was the same when urinating. He tried to piss like a man while making as much water sound as possible, and even after coming out, he held his head up confidently. He felt at ease only when he proved he wasn’t the type of guy to sit on the toilet and check how wet his crotch was.
Taein washed only his hands and feet and came outside.
The room was quiet. When he went to the window and looked outside, he could see Gu Wanjae getting into the car.
As soon as Taein saw the car leave, he headed back to the bathroom.
He couldn’t even use the bathroom comfortably.
No, it wouldn’t matter if he did, but he was mainly scared of being caught in this state.
Taein, sitting on the toilet, pulled down his pants and underwear at the same time.
He’d been feeling it since earlier, but his underwear was a mess, soaked with bodily fluids. Taein grimaced and unrolled toilet paper. First he wiped his underwear, then wiped his back too. He didn’t know where the water kept coming from. His face turning red as he wiped between his legs, Taein bit his lower lip. It had been fine when they left the guesthouse.
It was the same at the gambling house.
Taein squeezed his eyes shut as he recalled what happened next. Who would have known? That he would act like that there. He’d never thought about it even once. Kissing Gu Wanjae. Wasn’t that somewhat different in concept from jerking off? Taein still found that act, where each other’s breathing could be explicitly felt, strange. Of course, sucking dick was also strange. But jerking off was just satisfying desires like an animal, while kissing was an act that required more emotional involvement. Taein felt tormented by the fact that he’d had such a kiss – his first kiss at that – with Gu Wanjae.
He hated it, but in the midst of hating it, his body had become like this.
Ah.
Taein put his hand to his forehead and stayed in the same position for a long time.
Even after coming outside, that thought didn’t disappear.
Taein shook his head and turned on the TV. After watching unknown dance singers dancing, he leaned back against the bedding.
This was better than being lost in thought alone.
He was thinking that while continuing to watch the music show.
Suddenly, he heard knocking on the door.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
