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Earth Hero’s Retirement Project 42

How to Become the Demon King’s Lover (1)

What is a lover? Two people in love. Then, what is love? That…

Cha Eui-sung wrestled with a question he’d never seriously considered before. At least the room service that arrived with a swipe of cash and the crisp, conditioned air helped ease his misery, sparing him the need to step outside.

Of all the things I imagined I’d be worrying about in this life…

Whether in his first life or this second one, he’d never come close to having a lover—hell, not even a proper friend. The quality of life between the two timelines was vastly different, sure, but he hadn’t had the luxury of forming deep connections in either.

Still, in this second life, there had at least been moments when other people had mistakenly assumed they were close. From the perspective of someone faking their way through it, that kind of misunderstanding was far more manageable.

“I’d give it all up. The money, my family, even my pride! As long as I have you!”

“Sun-hee…!”

The drama he’d started watching out of sheer boredom was overflowing with lines that should never be taken seriously. It was becoming more and more obvious that the kind of ideal relationships people dreamed up only ever happened between creatures with entirely different brain structures than his.

After all, once he cleared the Demon King and saved the world, he’d have a long, long future ahead of him. Was he supposed to spend all those years broke and digging in the dirt just because he didn’t value love over money and fame?

“Haa…”

Thankfully, while he was disturbed, he hadn’t completely lost his mind. He hadn’t sunk so low as to go googling self-help books about love or typing in “What is love?” and posting it on every random forum out there.

The very thought of making a post like that was enough to kill off what little sleep he could muster.

So, was there anyone he could actually ask for advice? The only person he had regular conversations with was Kim Jeong-baek, and asking that guy for dating tips would be less helpful than just staring into a mirror and taking skincare advice from his own reflection.

Honestly, Kim Seo-ryong probably knew more about this stuff than Jeong-baek did. Which meant, basically, that neither of them knew a damn thing.

At least things seem okay between me and Moon Tae-young…

Objectively speaking, when someone keeps stopping by in the evenings to laze around in your living room before quietly disappearing again, you couldn’t exactly call them a stranger.

It wasn’t quite a standard friendship either, but in certain ways, they were definitely more entangled than most.

So it wasn’t like he was starting from total scratch with this whole weird relationship business. There were countless cases of people becoming lovers after starting out as ambiguous friends, right?

Besides…

“Would you smile for me… just once?”

Cha Eui-sung recalled the last time he’d seen Moon Tae-young before coming here.

Only after coming to his senses did he realize how ridiculous his behavior had been—groping someone’s face just to get a sense of their features.

Yet Moon Tae-young hadn’t looked upset, hadn’t smacked his hand away, hadn’t even firmly rejected him. He’d simply stared back at Eui-sung in visible confusion.

At that close distance… what had he been thinking?

Was it just because I looked totally out of it?

Even if that were the case, it wasn’t an easy thing to tolerate. Cha Eui-sung remembered all too well how awful it had felt back before his Awakening, when some creep had put their hands on his face.

Of course, he was far better looking than those creeps, and his personality wasn’t half bad either, but still… even if it had been a friend, it was a weird thing to do.

It’s still awkward between us sometimes… but this doesn’t feel like just friendship.

That night, the hand that had shielded his eyes had lingered on his forehead for a long time. He could still recall the sensation of Moon Tae-young’s fingers brushing through his hair.

Could it be that guy really had some kind of feelings, just like the Savior Gauge had hinted?

“…God, thank goodness I didn’t go back down right away.”

Cha Eui-sung let out a heavy sigh as he stared blankly at the TV drama.

He’d originally planned to just check out the dungeon and return, but ended up booking several nights because his own unstable state had been throwing him off. Between the past trauma and skill side effects, he’d been in no shape to stay in Cheongseri for long.

More than that, he was increasingly convinced he’d be seeing Moon Tae-young every single day. And the way he kept losing his composure around him was seriously starting to get on his nerves.

That’s why he’d given himself more time than usual to sort things out…

And in hindsight, it had been the right call. The dungeon really was a horror show, and now here he was—unable to focus on it at all, stuck brooding about love instead.

If he went back to breathing in Cheongseri’s air right now, he’d probably revert to that same idiot he used to be.

He needed to enjoy the comforts of civilization and shake off this ridiculous mess somehow.

 

***

 

[Notice] Welcome to PortalOne, the exclusive Hunter community.

[Notice] Please avoid using informal speech or profanity.

[Notice] Rank-up announcement below.

– – – – –

Title: Are dungeons stable these days?
Posted by: Castleka

Aside from that one in Cheorwon that got flagged recently… In the States, an unstable A-rank popped up right in the middle of a rich neighborhood, and it’s total chaos over there.

KeiKei: Dungeons always pop up and disappear, nothing new.
HunterAnswerer: Not really? Honestly, I wish we’d get an S-rank one in Gangnam.
⤷ S-Rank Martial Artist: What did Gangnam residents ever do to you?
⤷ HunterAnswerer: I just envy them, hehe.

– – – – –

Title: Am I the only one creeped out by the Incheon dungeon?
Posted by: Castleka

That S.a.n.g.g.a one is giving me the chills. Even the name—S.a.n.g.g.a—sounds off…

S-Rank Martial Artist: That’s not the kind of ‘sangga’ (shopping arcade) you’re thinking of.
⤷ Castleka: I know, but it just gives off a weird vibe T_T
Ryesool: Low-rankers find any dungeon scary… I don’t go anywhere above A-rank.
⤷ Songaji: Wow, you still go up to B-ranks? I stop at C-rank T_T

– – – – –

“Like hell I care where you people go.”

Cha Eui-sung muttered as he shut off his phone. He’d poked around to see if anyone else had sensed something off—perhaps a sign of something beyond normal dungeon activity—but that was the only post that came close.

When he really thought about it, it made sense. Incheon148 had only seemed eerie because of his mood. On the surface, it looked like any standard dungeon.

If the System hadn’t gone off with that blaring alarm, screaming at him like something was catastrophically wrong, he would’ve just glanced around and walked away with a sigh of relief.

So maybe that relentless flood of unreadable message windows had just been a scare tactic.

Even if it really is an Outer God issue, I need more info before I can dodge or deal with it.

And if Incheon148 ended up vanishing on its own, then there’d be no reason to stay freaked out. Not that he wanted to go back, but at least his mind wasn’t crumbling like a sandcastle anymore. That alone was progress.

Cha Eui-sung took a slow sip of his cocktail, a relaxed look on his face. Booze didn’t even get him drunk anymore, but he’d grown to enjoy the ambiance of places like this—one of the few pleasures he’d discovered in this second life.

Just then, he made eye contact with someone.

When he set down his glass and gave a languid smile, the person offered a curious look and started digging through their inner jacket pocket.

That brought the total number of business cards he’d collected here to seven.

Guess I’ve still got it.

Looks mattered. Period. They were an undeniable asset.

If someone like Lee Sang-jo pulled shady stunts, he was a bastard. But if an S-rank did the same thing? Suddenly it came across like they had their reasons.

By the same logic, even when Cha Eui-sung acted prickly, he could still build Savior Gauge points—about 20% of which, frankly, were probably thanks to Moon Tae-young’s face.

Even with perception dampened, it was easy to imagine he was attractive. He’d had a pretty relatable past, too. And the guy was possibly S-rank on top of that.

Now that Cha Eui-sung had gotten a good look at his classically handsome, almost dazzling features, it was easier to do all kinds of things without that visceral sense of discomfort.

If he was going to cling to someone, better it be a good-looking, nice-smelling guy.

With that thought, he could almost feel Moon Tae-young’s scent tickling the edge of his senses again.

Moon Tae-young probably felt the same.

If someone who looked like that clung to you with empathy and quiet sorrow in his eyes… even if he didn’t flash some radiant smile like a faded childhood memory, you’d eventually give in.

If he just traced the fragments shown by the skill, step by step, he might even discover his exact taste…

“I’ve been watching you for a while. Aren’t you bored being here alone?”

Ffft.

His train of thought was cut off by a business card that suddenly slid into view beside his face.

It was that same person he’d locked eyes with earlier.

[Team Leader of SY Special Development, Field Team 3.]

Seriously, was it smart to hand this kind of card to just anyone?

Cha Eui-sung scooped up the pile of cards on the table, fanned them out like a deck, and flashed a broad grin as he placed the new one right on top.

“I’ll be in touch.”

“Not tonight?”

“Too tired to see anyone tonight.”

Leaning back in his seat, he gazed up, meeting their face with a languid expression. That look of disbelief on their face quickly melted into one of amusement.

Good. That ever-reliable, first-impression-worthy face of his still worked like a charm. He’d been unsure back in Cheongseri, but now it was obvious.

After lingering a while longer to soak up the atmosphere, Cha Eui-sung crumpled the paper with the phone number and pocketed only the business card before leaving the lounge.

At this point… It felt like he was finally ready to see Moon Tae-young again.

 

***

 

The most astonishing—and frankly infuriating—thing about Moon Tae-young was that he almost never reached out first.

Thanks to that, Cha Eui-sung could always meet him on his own terms, sure… but still.

He stared at the number that hadn’t sent so much as a text or missed call in days. 

This bastard had no problem messaging first when he wanted me to take that fancy handkerchief.

Even after getting this close, it was always Cha Eui-sung who had to make the first move—initiating plans, pushing things forward. Moon Tae-young would just accept it all with that unreadable expression of his, never once offering.

[I’m heading back today. Should be there by this evening. You gonna be home around 7?]

A half-empty bottle he hadn’t bothered to pack clinked in the back seat. Cha Eui-sung drove into Cheongseri as the sun dipped below the horizon.

He’d gotten the car washed while he was out, and now it gleamed under the fading light. He ran a hand along the smooth surface before slamming the door shut with a satisfying thunk.

“Sorry I’m late.”

7:02 p.m. Right on time, if you asked him. He’d deliberately dragged things out to arrive just then, and sure enough, Moon Tae-young was already waiting in front of the house.

If this were back when they’d first met, Tae-young would’ve hit him with something like, “You must be awfully busy these days,”—a subtle jab asking what shady business a guy like him could possibly be up to.

Before the Lee Sang-jo incident, he would’ve just left a text saying, “If you’re busy, let’s meet some other time,” and disappeared.

But now, with the Savior Gauge at 35%, Moon Tae-young stood quietly by the door, offering no criticism, no questions.

“Did you take care of everything?”

The tone was level and calm—nothing more—but it still struck Cha Eui-sung as a huge change.

“Huh? What’s this?”

“I picked it up while I was in town. Last time, it looked like you liked having this kind of thing as a side dish.”

Without hesitation, Moon Tae-young handed it over. Inside the bag were various fruits.

Honestly, Eui-sung had only eaten them because they were the least bothersome option. But somehow, this seemingly useless gift made his heart feel unexpectedly light.

As he looked Tae-young up and down after days apart, Cha Eui-sung reached back and scratched the back of his head for no reason at all.

Levia
Author: Levia

Earth Hero’s Retirement Project

Earth Hero’s Retirement Project

Status: Completed Author:
The moment he’d always dreamed of has finally arrived. After struggling endlessly through hardship post-regression, he’s finally claimed the top seat at the Hunter Association! S-rank Hunter Cha Eui-sung was adjusting his suit, ready to walk toward the cheering crowd—   KWA-A-AANG!   —when meteors suddenly rained down from the sky.   [The world has been destroyed by the Demon King.] [New! A mission has been added.]   SAVE THE WORLD Protect the Earth!   “Wha—holy shit!”   With the end of the world comes a second regression. If he fails to stop the Demon King this time, this really is his last life. Now cast as the [Hero], Cha Eui-sung sets out in search of the [Demon King]. In front of a small, dilapidated school building in the quiet countryside village of Cheongseri, he spots a tall man.   ‘…Are we really letting the Demon King work as a teacher now?’   Forced to operate under a bizarre handicap that forbids him from harming the Demon King, can Cha Eui-sung stop the apocalypse and preserve his brilliant S-rank life?

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