77
The next morning. Siwoo, with a fluffy pillow between his thighs, tossed and turned violently. He wobbled precariously on the edge of the bed, and finally rolled onto the floor.
“Ugh!”
Waking up simultaneously, Siwoo blinked his eyes wide. When did I fall asleep? As soon as the question arose, the answer quickly followed.
“Ah…”
Unfortunately, Siwoo’s memory was clear.
His eyelids had closed immediately after Jihan laid him on the bed. Siwoo had fallen asleep as quickly as Geonho. It was the aftermath of doing guiding for a long time after a while. Moreover, due to the wide range of contact, it had been a fairly challenging guiding for Siwoo.
“Crazy…”
Frozen in the position he had fallen on the floor, Siwoo couldn’t even think of getting up. He just lay still, rapidly opening and closing his eyes.
The moment he saw the white ceiling, his sleepiness completely vanished. On the blank view, Jihan rose like a fluffy cloud. To be precise, the vivid memory of hugging Jihan surfaced.
“Shit.”
That wasn’t all. Siwoo had even teared up in front of Jihan while imagining an Esper going berserk. He must have lost his mind.
“Hospital, I need to go to the hospital.”
Suddenly looking for a hospital, he jumped up from the bed and started packing his things again. He took out the backpack stuffed in the wardrobe and crammed in what few clothes he had.
“I’m crazy. This is properly crazy.”
Siwoo packed his bags hurriedly, determined to be admitted to the hospital immediately. He felt like he had gone mad with guiding. Or was in the process of going mad.
He remembered persistently offering to do more guiding even when Yoo Jihan had politely declined, saying it was enough.
If he couldn’t remember, he would have just cursed at Jihan and been done with it. Instead, he was in a situation where he should be grateful to that annoying Yoo Jihan. That made Siwoo even angrier.
“Is all guiding like this?!”
He shouted loudly at the nauseating scenes flashing before his eyes, even though he tried not to think about them. No matter how much noise he made, the memories crowding his mind didn’t diminish at all.
[Get more guiding before you go.]
“Get what! I said it’s enough, you crazy bastard!”
Siwoo lifted a pillow high and slammed it onto the bed, pummeling it with fierce punches. He caused a commotion to forget Yoo Jihan’s smiling face and the touch of hands caressing his waist.
“If it’s like this, I’m never doing it again! It’s fucking disgusting!”
After beating the pillow for a while as if throwing a tantrum, he buried his face in the fabric and screamed loudly. Only then did his churning insides calm down a bit.
“Haa…”
He was as flustered as when he first met the leader while naked. He thought such things only happened with the leader, who had an abnormally high matching rate. Siwoo couldn’t believe that he, the guide, had gotten excited and pounced first.
Right, let’s just quit.
It seemed the guide job didn’t suit him after all. Although it was actually the opposite, Siwoo was convinced he shouldn’t be a guide and shouldered his backpack.
He was about to kick the door open and leave, but the most important item was missing. He had already packed the Churu and put snacks in the front pocket, but he couldn’t see the mouse doll.
After searching every corner of the room for the doll, he belatedly remembered leaving it in the bathroom. Kang Geonho had hand-washed it and hung it on the bathroom doorknob. It should be dry by now.
Siwoo sighed deeply and rubbed his face vigorously. Though he had packed his backpack out of habit, he didn’t really dare to leave. Even if he left, he was bound by contract, so he would have to return after disappearing for a few days. At least until the embarrassment subsided, he wanted to avoid Yoo Jihan.
If they had done more than hugging, he would have run away immediately without a second thought.
Just kissing the leader had been embarrassing enough for Siwoo. Although it was guiding, the shock lasted a long time because he wasn’t used to physical contact.
Siwoo closed his eyes tightly and let out a long breath through his nose. After standing for a while with a thoughtful face, he slowly put down his backpack.
Let’s wash up and think about it.
He left the room first, needing to get his doll. Suddenly, Jihan’s words telling him not to think about anything echoed in his ears, and he shook his perfectly fine ear hard.
Hoping for Yoo Jihan’s existence to just disappear, he flung open the door. Then he heard the sound of a small TV from the living room. It was a sound rarely heard in the Baekya Guild’s lodging.
The person who had turned on the living room TV was the maknae, Seojun.
“…”
He was sitting on the sofa with his chin propped up, staring blankly at Siwoo. With a slightly dumbfounded expression.
Siwoo lifted his chin and responded with a fierce gaze. He perceived it as a staring contest since Seojun was staring at him intently without greeting.
“Our lodging isn’t soundproof.”
“What?”
Seojun turned off the TV indifferently and got up from the sofa.
“I’m saying everything can be heard if you shout.”
Siwoo hesitated for a moment, then quickly turned his head and strode towards the bathroom. He was going to grab the mouse doll hanging upside down on the doorknob first before entering the bathroom.
“Did you sleep right away yesterday?”
As Siwoo was about to close the bathroom door, Seojun blocked it. He leaned his elbow on the door and looked down at Siwoo.
“I knocked, but there was no response.”
“I guess I was asleep then.”
“Right after Jihan hyung left?”
At the mention of Jihan’s name, Siwoo’s expression hardened and he gripped the mouse doll tightly. The doll reacted with a “squeak” instead of Siwoo. It sounded just like it was telling him to shut up.
Siwoo tried to close the door, signaling Seojun to mind his own business. However, because Seojun was blocking it with his arm, the door wouldn’t budge no matter how much he pulled the handle.
“Hey, get lost.”
“I’ll leave if you answer.”
Seojun’s eyes moved widely as if examining Siwoo’s complexion. Although slightly swollen, Siwoo’s complexion was the same as usual. He didn’t look particularly troubled. His walking form was also normal.
Then why was he shouting from the morning?
“I slept right after he left. Happy now? Go away.”
“Did Jihan hyung do something disgusting?”
Siwoo’s eyes widened. He was about to ask what Seojun meant, but remembering that he had shouted alone, he bit his lip.
“No.”
He didn’t want to talk anymore. All he had to say were embarrassing things. He would never speak of it, even if he died.
“Just leave. I’m going to wash up.”
He pushed Seojun’s shoulder roughly, showing his irritation. Of course, the firm shoulder didn’t budge at all.
“The bathroom door doesn’t lock.”
“So what? Get lost!”
Siwoo pushed him again, letting Seojun’s words go in one ear and out the other. Fortunately, this time the large body stepped back. If he hadn’t moved, Siwoo was going to call for Kang Geonho.
Siwoo leaned on the sink after closing the bathroom door. He was already tired even though he hadn’t done anything. After shouting his heart out and dealing with the maknae, he felt exhausted as if the whole day had ended.
Could it be the after-effects of doing guiding for a long time? There was a possibility since he wasn’t used to guiding yet.
Siwoo pressed his eyes firmly and clenched his teeth hard. Even sighing felt tiresome.
The guiding session with Jihan made him acutely aware of his own abilities. He realized for the first time how unstable a guide he was.
He still had a long way to go. His inexperience was glaringly obvious.
“So embarrassing…”
The more he recalled Yoo Jihan calmly soothing him, the more Siwoo felt his own immaturity. He also ruminated on Kang Geonho’s warning to moderate his guiding because it was dangerous.
The experience gap between Siwoo, who had just entered the center this year, and them was incomparably large. It was natural. So it was right to listen to what they said.
If they said to be careful, he really should be careful. Much more than he thought.
He now regretted not properly receiving contact guiding training. He had avoided practical training, insisting on doing only radiation guiding.
He should have just learned it properly. Siwoo chewed on his lower lip and hung his head low.
As he looked down at the hand that had touched Jihan, Siwoo’s face deepened with concern. This wouldn’t do.
Knock knock.
He glared at the bathroom door at the sudden knock that interrupted his thoughts. They wouldn’t give him a moment of peace.
“What now!”
“Guide-nim, you have a phone call.”
Seojun’s voice came from outside the door. Although annoyed, Siwoo opened the door since he hadn’t undressed yet.
Seojun was standing with his back to the door, holding Siwoo’s phone in one hand.
“Give it to me.”
Siwoo snatched the phone directly from Seojun’s hand. As Seojun had said, the phone was ringing.
Another call from an unknown number. Siwoo glanced at the unfamiliar number and indifferently turned off the vibration.
“Who is it?”
Seojun, who had checked that Siwoo was dressed through his peripheral vision, turned around completely.
“Don’t know.”
“An unknown number?”
“Yeah.”
Just as Siwoo was about to close the door again, the silent phone started ringing again. It was a call from the same number as before.
Frowning, Siwoo was about to turn off the vibration out of habit again. Then Seojun suddenly reached out and snatched the phone without permission.
“What the-!”
Before Siwoo could shout at Seojun to give the phone back, Seojun pressed the answer button on the phone screen.
Seojun’s expression was sharp as he put the phone to his ear instead of Siwoo.
“Who is this?”
He spoke to the person on the other end of the phone in an uncharacteristically cold voice. It was completely different from the voice he used when pretending to be nice in front of people. He had never used such a cold voice even when dealing with Siwoo.
Siwoo looked up at Seojun like this and thought to himself. Were there still more hidden sides to him?
There might be many more.
