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Siwoo sat down next to Taebeom without saying a word. He moved slowly, not rushing to initiate guiding or make contact.
When he lifted his head to meet Taebeom’s eyes as he sat in the chair, it felt similar to when he was standing. He just quietly looked at Taebeom like that.
“Go inside and sleep,” Taebeom spoke first, breaking the lengthening silence. Siwoo responded immediately, as if he had been waiting.
“I’m not sleepy.”
“Sleep anyway.”
“I don’t want to.”
Siwoo turned to face the campfire, stubbornly staying put.
“It’s cold inside,” he added as an excuse, afraid Taebeom might force him out. In truth, the cave wasn’t cold. Thanks to Seojun warming it with his body heat along with the blankets, it was rather hot.
Fortunately, the excuse seemed to work as Taebeom didn’t tell him to go inside again. Siwoo sat quietly beside him, relieved. He then touched the firewood Taebeom had arranged.
“You know, leader,” he said, picking up a small twig and opening his mouth wide.
“Don’t shoulder everything alone. And don’t try to distance yourself unnecessarily.”
He spoke slowly and clearly, occasionally checking if Taebeom was looking at him.
“You’re deliberately being cold to me right now, aren’t you? To prevent me from guiding you.”
He glared at Taebeom with a knowing look, then scratched the ground with the twig.
Taebeom didn’t respond. He just sat quietly in the chair, watching Siwoo’s slowly moving lips.
“You’re avoiding it because you know I’ll get hurt if I guide you when you’re not feeling well, right?”
He wasn’t expecting an answer. Siwoo continued the conversation stubbornly on his own, drawing on the ground with the twig.
Slightly slanted eyes and an expressionless straight line for a mouth. Emphasizing the sharp jawline, it looked quite similar to Kang Taebeom.
“Even if I understand the reason, it still hurts my feelings, so take it easy.”
Siwoo poured out everything that had been building up inside him. Finally, his heavy heart felt a little lighter. While he was at it, he brought up Kang Geonho as well.
“Instead of secretly gazing at him wistfully while he’s sleeping, just be nice to him. It’s not like you’re shooting a movie alone, why make things so complicated?”
He grumbled, poking at the face of Taebeom he had drawn on the ground. The twig that had been scratching the ground wildly now drew a large dog.
Siwoo recalled young Geonho and Taebeom sleeping side by side amicably.
When would he be able to see that sight again? He really wanted to see Taebeom smiling at his brother once more.
“Leader,” Siwoo raised his head towards Taebeom and opened his mouth wider.
“Once we solve this situation and get out, tell everyone about your condition.”
He looked up at him, pointing the twig like a gun as if threatening. If Taebeom didn’t confess after getting out, Siwoo planned to reveal it himself.
“I’ll be by your side.”
He emphasized again that Taebeom must speak up. Gripping the leg of the metal chair instead of his hand, he tried to put on the most dependable expression he could.
While thinking about him in the cave, a thought suddenly occurred to him. Could it be that Taebeom lacked the courage to say that his ability was gradually disappearing?
It was just a wild guess, but somehow it seemed possible. After all, he was someone who had always received everyone’s expectations.
“Don’t even think about shouldering everything alone.”
Siwoo continued to pour out words to Taebeom. He liked that Taebeom wasn’t ignoring or avoiding him. He hoped this moment would last as long as possible. It was the first time they had sat face to face and had such a long conversation.
“Just because you’re the leader, don’t think about sacrificing yourself alone. No one will be happy if you do that. Not a single person.”
He emphasized the last words, waving the twig. As a result, some dirt from the twig flew onto Taebeom’s thigh.
Ah, did I overdo it?
Siwoo put down the twig, glancing at Taebeom’s expression. Then he carefully placed his hand on Taebeom’s thigh to brush off the dirt bit by bit.
Unfortunately, the dirt had scattered to the inner thigh as well. If he touched there, he might get kicked out.
His hesitant fingertips hovered over the firm thigh. At that moment, Taebeom’s cool left hand approached and grabbed Siwoo’s hand.
Just as Siwoo thought he was going to be thrown far away, the opposite happened.
Taebeom enveloped Siwoo’s hand. As if embracing it, he completely covered the back of Siwoo’s hand and even gently rubbed it with his thumb.
It wasn’t the first time their hands had touched, yet Siwoo froze in surprise at Taebeom’s sudden action. Even though it was just a hand touching him.
Taebeom continued to touch and caress the back of Siwoo’s hand. After touching the transparent skin where blue veins were visible for a while, he raised his gaze and stared intently at Siwoo’s dumbfounded face.
As if entranced, Siwoo leaned his face towards him. He just felt like doing so.
Then Taebeom began to touch Siwoo’s face as well as his hand.
His hand slowly rose and caressed Siwoo’s lukewarm cheek. Feeling strange from the slow touch, Siwoo gulped again. His eyes automatically closed tightly at the sensation of Taebeom touching the corners of his eyes.
Unconsciously, his head moved a little closer to Taebeom. As if asking to be touched more.
The hand that had been lingering at the corner of his eye traced his round forehead. Then it passed over the high bridge of his nose and reached the hollow above his upper lip.
Siwoo’s faint breath touched Taebeom’s fingertips. Unfortunately, Taebeom couldn’t feel his breath.
“…It tickles,” Siwoo murmured, unable to bear the sensation on his upper lip. He didn’t mean to stop though. Seeing the hand move away immediately, his hips fidgeted with disappointment.
“I’ll guide you,” he said, grabbing Taebeom’s left hand.
Since it wasn’t his real hand anyway, there was no sensation when he held it. If it had been a real hand instead of a cold prosthetic, his body would have reacted first. Even just touching hands would have made his lower body heavy and his head hot.
“Just do radiation guiding,” Taebeom’s voice fell firmly. Siwoo slightly pouted his lips. He nodded vaguely and wrapped his hands around Taebeom’s prosthetic.
Taebeom was watching Siwoo start the radiation guiding when he suddenly stood up. Siwoo wondered where he was going, but Taebeom abruptly lifted him up and sat him in his chair.
Then he even took off his jacket and covered Siwoo’s knees with it.
“The floor is cold…” Siwoo murmured, watching Taebeom sit on the ground after giving him the chair. He felt strange as the jacket with Taebeom’s body heat wrapped around his knees.
“Don’t do it if it’s hard,” Taebeom said, facing Siwoo and releasing his wavelength that he had been hiding.
His wavelength, which had been sensitively tangled, absorbed Siwoo’s energy as if drinking the water of life. Even without skin contact, Siwoo felt Taebeom’s wavelength stinging.
As expected, there was a reason he was keeping his distance. Taebeom’s wavelength, which looked fine on the surface, was in a state like a beast on the verge of starvation.
Siwoo took a deep breath, accepting the approaching pain. Taebeom’s dark eyes clung to Siwoo’s face, as if examining his expression.
“…How much guiding medicine did you take?”
There was a terrible medicinal energy surrounding Taebeom’s wavelength. The fact that he looked fine despite his wavelength being in this state was all due to the power of the medicine. Taebeom’s wavelength was almost pickled in medication. The artificial energy was enough to make Siwoo feel nauseous.
“An appropriate amount.”
What appropriate amount? He must have downed almost an entire bottle. As soon as they return to the center, he’ll need to get his stomach pumped immediately.
“Drug addict,” Siwoo glared and lightly hit Taebeom’s innocent jacket. Taebeom silently smoothed out the crumpled jacket.
Then his hand was caught by Siwoo again.
Siwoo held Taebeom’s left hand and released more guiding energy. No matter how much he touched his prosthetic hand, it couldn’t exceed the effect of radiation guiding.
Still, he wanted to hold his hand. He didn’t just want to hold it, he wanted Taebeom to touch him again.
Siwoo leaned his upper body towards Taebeom and gently placed Taebeom’s left hand on his cheek. Then he whispered shamelessly.
“You can caress me.”
His attitude suggested he would allow it, so hurry up and touch. He even rubbed his cheek against the broad palm as if urging him.
Although Taebeom’s wavelength was painful, it felt like it would hurt less if he touched him like before.
As if Siwoo’s feelings were conveyed, the large palm cupped his delicate cheek. Despite the cool touch, there was a strange warmth to it. It was odd.
Taebeom’s hand moved very slowly. As if reading braille, he traced each feature – eyes, nose, mouth – for a very long time.
Siwoo swallowed the ticklish feeling and fidgeted with his hands folded on top of the jacket. Afraid that Taebeom might withdraw his hand if he moved even a little, he remained as still as a statue.
Then, when Taebeom’s hand passed his chin and moved down to his neck, Siwoo instinctively hunched his shoulders. Fortunately, Taebeom didn’t withdraw his hand and continued to touch Siwoo.
The hand that brushed past his gently bobbing Adam’s apple delved between the collars of his clothes. Wondering how far he would touch, Siwoo lowered his gaze to follow. At the same time, his languidly relaxed eyes suddenly tensed up.
Taebeom was touching a red mark that had formed on Siwoo’s collarbone. It was a mark left by Seojun in the cave.
Siwoo quickly covered the mark and backed away. There was no need to hide it, but for some reason, he didn’t want Taebeom to see it.
“We were just hugging… He just sucked a little, that’s all,” he explained unnecessarily, avoiding Taebeom’s gaze. Wishing Taebeom would just ignore the mark and continue touching him, he only leaned his face forward.
However, Taebeom touched Siwoo’s neck instead of his face. He wrapped his hand around Siwoo’s slender neck to prevent him from avoiding it, and firmly pressed the red mark with his fingertips.
Siwoo felt like a deer caught by the neck by a hunter. He could only awkwardly roll his eyes and kept swallowing.
“Um, leader,” just as Siwoo was about to call out to Taebeom, wondering what kind of position this was, Taebeom suddenly lowered his head and pressed his lips against his own hand on Siwoo’s neck. As if kissing Siwoo’s neck.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
