Can Love Be Transferred Too? 39

#39

“You were too young.”

Bae Taeseong muttered as if lamenting.

“Too young.”

“Right……”

It was such a fierce embrace that my ribs ached, but strangely I didn’t want to ask him to let me go. So I stayed quietly for a while.

Fortunately, Bae Taeseong released me after a moment. Somewhat rough hands ruffled my hair.

And then…….

“Ah! Why are you suddenly flicking my forehead?”

“Someone with a hurt ankle riding a bike without any fear? You should have reported special conditions promptly.”

“I thought it would be okay. And just now it was because I suddenly stood up after sitting for a long time.”

“Oh, talking back?”

Bae Taeseong let out a dramatic sigh.

“Whoever dates you later is going to have a lot of heartache.”

“Hmph. I’ll only date someone who says it’s okay anyway.”

“You never back down from anything.”

We walked along the path next to the road we had circled on bikes, a walking trail decorated colorfully with low-planted flowers.

It would be a lie to say the following camera didn’t bother me, but fortunately Bae Taeseong’s composure seemed to transfer to me, so I avoided constantly glancing around.

“Hyung probably didn’t fight much when dating. Since you’re reliable and stable.”

“What are you talking about? We fought tooth and nail every day.”

“Eh, really?”

“Yeah. But we made up just as easily.”

Is that how it is when Alphas fight each other? I don’t know well since there are no Alpha couples around me. I looked around briefly then asked.

“Can I ask how you broke up? It seems like you dated for a long time.”

“I got dumped.”

He replied in a displeased tone.

“He said he didn’t know if we were habit or love.”

“His…… no, no. Your X’s feelings toward you?”

“Both. That’s probably right, but I couldn’t be sure of my own feelings either.”

“Did you agree with hyung?”

“What does my agreement matter? As you know, relationships need two people to start, but one person can end them.”

“True……”

After a brief silence, Bae Taeseong said.

“I still don’t understand. Can’t it be habit for a while? Does love absolutely have to be love every day, every hour, every minute, every second? How many people can clearly distinguish that…… and how necessary is that process?”

When I said “I wonder,” he shrugged.

“It was probably a difference in approach. He liked to raise questions and find answers, while I like to set premises and stick to them.”

“Hearing it like this, you two really didn’t match at all.”

“Yeah. Didn’t match for shit.”

Bae Taeseong chuckled.

“We weren’t even each other’s ideal types.”

“Ideal type…… What’s hyung’s ideal type?”

“Someone unchanging.”

He really likes someone like himself. I was thinking that when.

“And, someone cute, pretty, and delicate.”

“……”

The gaze that flew over as if saying “like you” somehow made me laugh.

It probably wasn’t a lie. But it didn’t seem to mean he wanted to try things with me now that he’d broken up with Han Jiwon.

I don’t know why I thought that. It was just the look in his eyes. A kind of intuition.

“You said you could be room for change……”

I said with a soft laugh.

“But hyung doesn’t seem very ready to change.”

“You think so?”

“Yes. That’s how it looks.”

Suddenly I remembered Jin Woohyeon’s eyes looking at me. His gaze was boiling a bit hotter than this. His heart that rushed in with quiet but clear heat. The sincerity that poured over me in an instant was still vivid.

Bae Taeseong’s heart seems to not have reached its critical point yet. I just had that intuition.

“It’s true that I have feelings for you.”

“……”

“But…… well. If we’re going to measure the size of feelings……”

He raised his arms in the air and moved his hands to form a round mass.

“If my feelings for you are about this much.”

He drew a circle slightly larger than a heart.

“My feelings for him are…… about this much?”

He moved his arms widely to draw a very large mass. Even then, feeling it was a bit lacking, he frowned slightly.

“Just in terms of size. It’s always been like that. Before we broke up, and after.”

“Of course? Since you spent time together. The size of my feelings for my X is this big too. But now the contents inside are changing, right? Like how my feelings for my X aren’t love anymore. Like there’s no hope or wishes in there.”

“Mm.”

“I think hyung’s X probably wanted you to distinguish those contents in detail. He wanted to have that kind of certainty.”

“Ah, damn.”

Bae Taeseong roared.

“You all live so damn complicated!”

“Ahahaha.”

After trivial conversation, he said.

“When we get to the dorm, tell Jiwon about your ankle condition and get treatment.”

“Suddenly?”

“I was going to mention it earlier but missed the timing. He specializes in athlete rehabilitation. You don’t need to explain in detail, just say it’s a nerve problem and show him how you walk, and he’ll handle it.”

“I see.”

I nodded.

“But it was unexpected. When I first saw Jiwon hyung, I thought he was a model? Idol? Something like that. He’s so pretty.”

“His dream was to be a singer. In high school he got street-cast by some entertainment company.”

“There seems to be a huge gap between singer and physical therapist. How did his career path change so drastically?”

“Because of an injury.”

“……Jiwon hyung got injured? Where? How?”

“No.”

Bae Taeseong said after a brief silence.

“Because I injured my shoulder at the national high school tournament. When they said I might have to quit being an athlete if I couldn’t manage it properly.”

“……”

“I sometimes wonder.”

He continued in a low voice.

“We weren’t even dating then. We were just classmates who fought like enemies. What did it matter to him whether my shoulder became useless or not, that he’d give up his dream……”

“It must have been big.”

I answered that way.

“Even if it wasn’t love, Jiwon hyung’s feelings for Taeseong hyung must have been big.”

I suddenly thought that. Even if the two don’t meet again, even if they never become lovers again after this breakup. Still, Bae Taeseong and Han Jiwon probably won’t become strangers. Following each other’s ways, thinking intensely, and clashing. I felt like they would carve out their own path like that.

I envied that. Because those two seemed to have a path I couldn’t draw.

Then what were my 10 years, and 20 years for…….

“Don’t think useless thoughts.”

He poked my cheek to divert my attention.

“Let’s go back now. After I see you enter the dorm, I have to go out again.”

“Can we stop by the mart on the way? Sehyeong said he wanted steamed clams with alcohol, so I want to buy some Manila clams.”

“Kim Sehyeong?”

“Yes. Yeonwoo said the same thing yesterday……”

“Does Lee Chan like that too?”

“He eats it, but finds it bothersome. He prefers fish over shellfish, right? Like shrimp.”

“Hmm.”

He said while putting the helmet on my head.

“Just buy clams. Don’t think about buying shrimp.”

“Are you jealous?”

“No. I’m just being petty.”

On the way back with him, I bought Manila clams, baguette, and short pasta.

After Bae Taeseong left again, dinner was with everyone except him. Han Jiwon, who had returned from his date with An Lei, also said he hadn’t received any separate contact, looking puzzled about why Bae Taeseong had been absent for hours.

After finishing dinner amid subtle curiosity, we sent heart messages following the production team’s guidance.

‘Now I’m really going to stop doing stupid things.’

I don’t know why this needs deep breathing, but trying to do something I hadn’t done made my heart pound and fingertips tremble. I took a deep breath in, out, in again, out again, repeated the process of breathing in…….

I sent the message.

[Thanks to hyung, I got to ride a motorcycle and a bicycle. I got to ride two-wheelers to my heart’s content. It was fun and good…… but please definitely get rid of the motorcycle.]

A few minutes later, the phone I had in my pocket vibrated.

✉(1) [You laughed a lot today, it was nice to see.]

No matter how I look at it, it’s Bae Taeseong. I smiled faintly and pressed the button to turn off the screen.

But a sparkling light appeared and it vibrated again.

✉(2) [I thought about what you said. I realized there were things I vaguely assumed would be okay and let slide. I want to talk before it’s too late…… I want to have a conversation in a more complete form. If it’s difficult to go out separately, let’s at least talk between us two.]

[Your X has chosen you.]

Before I could feel any impression, a message arrived from the production team.

[At 10 PM, we will hold a screening to reveal all participants’ Xs. All participants, please gather in front of the beam projector in the 2nd floor living room.]

[A special video for the 2nd week of ‘Can Love Be Transferred Too?’ will also be revealed.]

Author: Hyacinthus B

Hyacinthus