“What good is all this strength if I can only do one thing at a time?”
“Hey, some people struggle to do even one thing. And it’s not like you can’t do it at all—you’re just a bit clumsy compared to your other skills.”
“I should’ve taken the Center Director seriously when he told me to train for simultaneous activation. I thought I was fine since nothing major had happened until now… and I got cocky.”
Rion had always known that simultaneous activation—executing multiple abilities at once—was a weak point for him. But because he had so much raw power and excellent mobility, it hadn’t ever caused any real issues.
Most monsters had low intelligence, and there were always teammates watching his back in Gates. So far, there’d been no serious problems.
That’s why he’d skipped training, thinking it was a waste of time. He’d taken on other assignments instead or trained through practical experience inside Gates. He never thought it would come back to bite him like this.
“Don’t beat yourself up too much. It was the only choice you had. And it’s not like anyone got seriously hurt. We all walk into Gates knowing there’s a risk.”
“Still, I…”
“Just focus on the outcome. Everything turned out okay, didn’t it? If you hadn’t done what you did, you would’ve been the one hurt. And if that had happened, things would’ve gotten a lot messier for all of us.”
Gwang-hyeon gave Rion’s shoulder a few reassuring pats. It wasn’t anything profound, but just having someone nearby to say it was okay made Rion feel a bit calmer.
“You really going back in? You two can’t be near each other without fighting. This is a hospital, not the Center. If you two start throwing punches, no one’s going to clean up the mess for you.”
“…I just think I’ll feel better once I make sure he gets home safe. You go ahead.”
“Well… if you really have to, then I guess I can’t stop you.”
Gwang-hyeon shrugged as he stood up, clapping Rion on the shoulder one last time before heading out of the hospital.
“…You’re back. You can go rest, you know.”
“I know. But I won’t be able to relax unless I see you walk out of here fine.”
Back in the ER, Yu-won was still lying there, hooked up to an IV. Even in the middle of summer, his lips hadn’t regained their color after being frozen, and just looking at him made Rion feel a pang of guilt.
“…Sorry.”
“For what?”
“This happened because of me…”
Rion’s hand trembled slightly as he recalled the moment he dropped the snow. Could he really claim that none of the frustration he’d bottled up over time played a part in that decision?
Was he still qualified to be an Esper, knowing he’d turned away like that?
“I should’ve handled it to the end, no matter what. I’m sorry.”
Rion bowed his head, deeply. As much as he hated Yu-won, he still would’ve preferred to be the one who got hurt.
“I’ll take you home once the IV is done.”
“Don’t apologize.”
Yu-won replied in a calm, even voice. But Rion couldn’t just brush it off.
“You’re bad at multitasking. You always drop the ball the second you’re under attack. I’ll take care of myself—just worry about your own damn body!”
He still remembered how he’d felt the moment Yu-won said those words: irritated, anxious to the point his hands trembled, like he was still standing on that snowy mountain.
“I was the one who told you to do that. If you hadn’t, you or Min-chan would’ve taken a worse hit from the boss.”
“That’s not the same. We’re Espers. You’re not.”
Inside a Gate, a Guide was no different from a civilian.
Espers, even if cornered, had the instinctive ability to defend themselves with their powers. Guides had no such luxury.
But because Gates could last anywhere from three days to a full week, it was unavoidable—they had to bring Guides inside. And that meant Espers had a responsibility to protect them.
Even if the Guide in question was a tall, muscular adult man who never shut up with his smart-ass remarks.
Inside a Gate, even an eighty-year-old Esper woman could overpower a healthy twenty-something man. It was something Rion had heard so many times it echoed in his brain.
“If someone’s gonna get hurt, it should be me.”
Rion slumped his shoulders. Every time he came out of a Gate, it was him who had the scrapes and bruises. Rarely anything serious, but he’d always end up injured somehow.
Yu-won was usually the one nagging him for it, but now the roles were reversed. Seeing him lying in that ER bed shifted something in the air between them.
“I said I’m fine. I just hit a wall. I’ll be totally fine in a day or two.”
“Still, I…”
“Are you worried about me?”
Yu-won suddenly asked. It wasn’t a question he couldn’t ask, but coming from him, it sounded almost childish.
“…Of course I am. You’re a Center Guide. My matching Guide. You’re someone I was supposed to protect in the Gate…”
“Then I guess you finally understand a little.”
“Understand what?”
Rion blinked wide-eyed, confused. He waited in silence until Yu-won answered.
“What people feel when you come back injured because you couldn’t even take care of yourself.”
“You little—”
Was he really picking a fight right now? Rion clenched his jaw, reminded himself they were in a hospital, and swallowed the rest of his words.
“Is this really the time to nitpick?”
“It’s called empathy. Every time you come back hurt from trying to save someone, that’s how the people around you feel.”
“It’s not the same. There’s a difference between someone capable of saving others getting hurt doing it, and someone who isn’t capable getting themselves injured while trying to play hero.”
“You act like you’re some superpowered god, but from what I’ve seen, you’re not all that.”
Yu-won said flatly, not even looking at him.
“I’ve seen you collapse four times in the five months I’ve worked here. And no one knows about it, because those kinds of things don’t make the news.”
“That’s because if people knew I was badly hurt, it would cause a panic. No need to announce it.”
“What are you talking about? You’re not some untouchable being. You didn’t choose to get hurt. Why act like it’s some shameful secret? Is it really so fulfilling to play the part of ‘Korea’s Star Esper’ by hiding every little injury?”
Korea’s Star Esper. He couldn’t deny it was a heavy title. It sounded glorious, but it came with crushing weight.
He got roped into Esper-related events. If word of his injuries got out, it might cause public unrest, so he had to visit hospitals quietly.
Every time he entered a Gate, he was expected to lead the party and take full responsibility for what happened. And that burden sometimes crushed him.
Still, he believed it was necessary. That with the power he had, it was his duty. And doing that duty always gave him a sense of pride.
Others felt the same. Plenty of people told him to take care of himself—but no one had ever actually said these things to him.
“Maybe regular people get to do that. But I’m not some regular person.”
“You are a regular person. Stop talking like you’re some kind of god.”
“I’m not a god. But I am someone who can help. And I’m proud of that. I don’t regret anything I’ve done.”
Rion kept his voice even, deliberately avoiding raising it.
“I don’t know why you’re always out to bite my head off, but didn’t you give up college to become a Guide because you felt some sense of duty?”
“I gave up college, not myself.”
“You never let a damn word go, do you.”
Rion had planned to stay until the IV finished, but Yu-won really was the worst match for him. The IV bag wasn’t even half empty, and already he was wondering if he could make it through without yelling at this insufferable guy.
“Go home.”
“Huh?”
“How long has it been since you came out of the Gate? You’re sitting there gnawing your nails like you’re about to combust.”
Even when he was worried, the way Yu-won talked made it sound like he was just trying to be annoying. Rion took a deep breath and forced down his irritation.
“You’re the patient here.”
“I’m not so sick that I can’t catch a cab and go home by myself.”
“You made such a fuss when I got hurt. So how about you take your own advice and look after yourself for once?”
“Oh wow. So now you do understand how I feel? I’m touched.”
That sarcastic tone pushed Rion over the edge. He stood up. He’d tried to be patient, but there was no point staying by someone who clearly wanted to pick a fight.
“Then go ahead, walk yourself home with that big ol’ ego of yours. I shouldn’t have even bothered.”
Judging by how sharp his tongue was, he couldn’t be that hurt anyway. Fuming, Rion yanked open the curtain and stormed out of the ER.
“Just go back to your place and get some damn rest.”
Yu-won muttered at Rion’s retreating back. His voice was so small, so quiet, it had no chance of reaching him.
