There’s more than one of those things?
That staffer’s a goddamn lunatic.
If multiple brainless, S-rank monsters like that were crawling around in here, this went beyond misconduct—it bordered on attempted murder.
While I was on the verge of exploding in a fit of curses, Potato calmly urged me to focus, explaining what he’d figured out about this Simulator Dungeon.
[I can sense monster energy. It’s not multiple—just one more, aside from the roach bastard.]
Is it as big as that one?
[…Yeah.]
I’m gonna lose it.
[B-But! We have a real shot at winning!]
Based on what, exactly?
[If the one chasing us is a cockroach, the other one’s an antlion!]
Yep. Whoever designed the monsters for this Simulator Dungeon had an absolutely deranged aesthetic. They’d clearly gone all in on the “horrifying bug” theme.
Maybe I should just die and get it over with.
[Don’t say that!]
Kidding. Just saying it for fun.
I still hadn’t found the bastard who killed me in my past life—I wasn’t going down like this.
Even if it meant being exposed as an S-rank Guide to get out of here, I had to live long enough to hunt that murderer down.
Potato sighed in frustration.
[You idiot! You don’t need to use your real guiding power. There’s another way! What, has peaceful living turned your brain to mush?]
How dare my own ability roast me like that. Rude.
So what, then? What do you want me to do?
[Think! You’ve faced a monster shaped like an antlion before! Remember?]
When did I—ah.
Right.
I had fought one of those before—a giant antlion monster.
It was during my fifth year stationed at the frontlines.
At that point, I’d become something of an expert at resolving minor dungeon breaks. But one day, as if sensing a threat, a bunch of massive monsters suddenly burst out of a dungeon.
—Krrrrrrrrrr.
They were huge.
Like they’d dumped all their brain power into just growing larger, their behavior was simple and stupid. We didn’t realize it until we actually fought them.
Each swing of their massive limbs was a threat. At the time, they were our living nightmares.
Not only were they enormous and fast, but the S-rank variants had hardened exoskeletons, making subjugation incredibly difficult.
Je-ha, myself, and the rest of our squad thought we were done for.
We’d even exchanged dog tags and scrawled out half-assed wills, convinced it was our last day.
We went out ready to die—but the situation resolved in a completely unexpected way.
—Grrrrr!
—Ssshhk, sshhk, sshhhk!
—KYYYYAK!
“…Are they… fighting each other?”
At the moment we were cornered and surrounded by monsters—just as everything seemed lost—their gazes met.
At first, I thought they were about to team up on us.
But nope.
—GRAAAHH, KYAAAGH!
—KIEEEEK!
A massive eagle-type monster caught sight of a fat, ripe caterpillar-type monster—and started drooling.
I remembered that moment vividly because I almost took a faceful of that monster’s spit.
If Je-ha hadn’t thrown up a telekinetic barrier in time, I would’ve been drenched. That spit was highly acidic, capable of melting flesh on contact. I was so grateful to him that I ended up writing a song to repay the favor later.
Anyway, the eagle monster couldn’t resist anymore and lunged at the caterpillar—and then the others followed suit, all turning on each other.
—KIIIEEEK!
—KWEHHHH!
—GRUKK, GAHK!
Green monster ichor sprayed everywhere. We were so relieved, we just quietly backed off and watched from a safe distance.
They tore into each other, ripping and slashing wildly. Within about an hour, none of them were left standing. All dead.
“…I’ve never seen monsters this stupid before.”
“Right? Usually they’re smart enough to gang up and share the prey.”
“We should report this. Just in case we run into these types again.”
Je-ha was fascinated by their behavior and made sure to include it in his next official field report.
These giant monsters seemed to have invested all their cognitive function into bulk. They showed zero signs of intelligence or camaraderie.
Just pure, primal hunger. The only thing that motivated them was feeding.
Once we understood that, they weren’t scary anymore. We could just drag a similar monster in front of one and let them tear each other apart.
As long as you brought two of them together, they’d go berserk trying to kill each other. Problem solved.
Right. That’s what happened.
Having recalled the solution, I turned to Potato.
Where’s that giant antlion bastard?
[Just 700 meters at the two o’clock direction from here! There’s a sand pit where the antlion’s lying in wait!]
An antlion pit: a sunken trap in the sand, a slope too slippery to climb, designed to capture and devour ants.
The Simulator Gate was built on real-world data.
Which means its natural predatory instincts should be preserved, too.
Even this S-rank cockroach monster wouldn’t be immune to that.
I slipped into the middle of the group, slowing my pace.
“Hey! I’m only saying this once, so listen up. No reruns.”
“…What is it?”
Ra Ho-yeon panted as he asked.
“We’re going to lure the roach bastard into a trap.”
Seo Yoon-chae practically screeched.
“What the hell are you talking about?! When the hell did you have time to set a trap? You’ve been running nonstop since you got here!”
“God, shut up. I never said I made the trap.”
“What?”
Before Seo Yoon-chae could spout more nonsense, Ra Ho-yeon’s eyes sharpened, picking up on what I was implying.
As expected of the team’s leader.
I continued.
“There’s another monster besides Mister Roach. An antlion. There’s a giant pit just ahead. We toss him in there and get the hell out. Once they’re face-to-face, they’ll lose their minds trying to kill each other.”
“What? That’ll actually work?”
“You think I’d bring it up if it wouldn’t? We’re almost there. Stick to the plan. You guys play the bait. I’m just a fragile little ‘C-rank’ Guide, remember.”
Even if I die, I’m clinging to that C-rank act.
I will pass this damn test without guiding and without blowing my cover.
So help me out here, will you?
Ra Ho-yeon nodded.
“…Got it.”
Then Shin Tae-boem objected.
“Hyung! That’s way too risky! What if Yeon Yu-jin’s plan fails? Then we’re—!”
I didn’t expect them all to trust me right away.
But not everyone had to be bait.
I cut him off firmly.
“If you don’t like it, don’t do it. More bait’s better, sure—but if you’re scared, sit out. Just don’t whine when someone else has to take on more risk and draw the monster’s aggro.”
“We’re on the same team! You can’t talk like that—!”
“Shin Tae-boem. This isn’t a concert stage filled with cheering fans and flashing lights.”
This was war. A life-or-death battlefield.
“Even if it’s artificially constructed, this is still a dungeon. If you let your guard down, you’ll end up as monster food.”
“……”
“There’s only one goal here: getting out alive. Got it?”
God, I’m not even the type to explain myself in such detail.
But these kids were baby Espers—completely green when it came to dungeon survival. I had to cut them some slack.
That said, I laid it out clearly. Eventually, Shin Tae-boem gave in.
“…Fine.”
“So? You going to be bait, or are you ducking out with me?”
“…I’ll do it. I can’t leave Ho-yeon hyung alone.”
When I looked at Seo Yoon-chae and Cha Si-yoon, they reluctantly nodded.
“Ugh, fine. We’ll do it. You better be right about this plan working. If something goes wrong, I’m coming for you.”
“…You haven’t been wrong lately, so I’ll trust you, hyung.”
“Good. That’s what I like to hear.”
Potato screamed in my ear.
[The antlion pit’s right ahead!]
I issued final instructions.
“The pit’s just up ahead. When I give the signal, turn around and unleash every last attack you’ve got. Just stall for time and taunt the monster as much as possible. Say whatever you want—insult it, provoke it.”
With time so short, I performed quick contact Guiding with each of them—just a light touch on their hands or shoulders. It looked more convincingly C-rank that way.
Seo Yoon-chae asked nervously, teeth chattering,
“W-What should I even say?”
“Whatever insults you know. Broad-scale aggro. Say it looks weak as hell—anything works.”
Strangely enough, even these intelligence-devoid monsters could perfectly understand when they were being insulted. No idea why, but they never let that slide.
“Once it locks onto you and charges, Si-yoon—you blast a gust of wind sideways and throw all of you away from the pit’s edge. Once they’re both in there, they’ll be too busy ripping each other apart to notice us. Understood?”
Cha Si-yoon took a deep breath.
“Got it.”
“And once I give the signal, blow wind under me too, so I land as far from that thing as possible.”
“…Okay.”
“Perfect. Let’s do this.”
Three.
Two.
One.
