#2
Seung-oh, who had been deeply absorbed in thought in his room, got up to disperse the thoughts of Ui-jin that had occupied his mind. He felt that only by opening his pores and increasing his heart rate could he somewhat fade the overwhelming presence of his unrequited love. He grabbed the doorknob and opened the door. Ui-jin had already gone to his room, as the living room that had been noisy until just moments ago was now quiet.
Seung-oh stared intently at Ui-jin’s door near the kitchen before turning his steps away.
“You’re really amazing…”
The first time they had sex, Ui-jin had repeatedly exclaimed in admiration at Seung-oh’s sweat-drenched body. His curled toes had alternated between clenching and unclenching at their own will, and the hole that embraced Seung-oh’s large member had continued to twitch relentlessly, displaying the most extreme ecstasy throughout his entire body. Despite the rapid movements as they fucked, that vivid face remained etched in Seung-oh’s memory for a long time.
“What’s so amazing?”
“This part of you.”
Ui-jin had touched their connected parts with trembling hands and smiled mischievously. Seung-oh found it fascinating how Ui-jin could remain so composed yet excited despite being helplessly rocked beneath him. And the more he pushed into Ui-jin’s depths, the more fascinating it was how his own mind gradually became clearer as his neck stiffened. It was almost as if the stimulated prostate was a source of recovery. Even though he knew that couldn’t be true.
“Ugh… Aren’t you, embarrassed? Saying things like that.”
“Mmm, I could say even more, ah…!”
“Seriously…”
“Let’s kiss. Okay?”
At Ui-jin’s urging, Seung-oh pressed his sweaty thighs together and bent down. Their sensitive lips met. Unlike the guiding kisses they had learned in class, they gradually began to mix their tongues sensually, and unconsciously, he would bite and caress Ui-jin’s lower lip. It was similar to the way lovers kissed.
Seung-oh’s heart pounded whenever he saw that small face immersed in their kisses within his embrace. The same happened when seeing those skinny thighs as clothes were hastily removed, when hearing the sharp moans of pleasure at climax, or when Ui-jin, claiming it wasn’t enough, would tear open a condom and put it on Seung-oh’s member himself. At some point, he had come to love that honest face.
“Hey, hey. Don’t cry. Why are you crying?”
Then one day, an incident occurred that made him sort out those feelings. Eun-hu, a fellow guide they were close with, came to Seung-oh and Ui-jin’s quarters hugging three bottles of soju that were prohibited from being brought in. He said he had fallen in love with his esper partner.
“How am I supposed to kiss him and have sex with him now… Who’s going to take responsibility for my battered heart?”
But that esper was already in love with someone else, and had called out someone else’s name while having sex with Eun-hu. The two of them tried hard to understand Eun-hu’s alcohol-laced words.
“Why can’t you? Just forget about it. Just think of it as nothing more, nothing less than a guide and an esper relationship. We can never be together in the first place, right? It’s just a work-related relationship. Just enjoy the physical part! Don’t think about anything and enjoy it!”
Ui-jin, also drunk with Eun-hu, said those words. Seung-oh, who was lining up the now empty green bottles in a row, felt a twinge of pain in his heart hearing those words.
“Then when you do it with him, with Ju Seung-oh here, you really don’t feel anything…?”
“Of course not. We’re partners. Partners who work really well together. Right, Seung-oh?”
“…”
Ui-jin fell asleep with those words, without even waiting for Seung-oh’s response.
“Ji Ui-jin. Do you really think that way?”
Each time Ui-jin exhaled through his parted lips, the smell of alcohol spread. Seung-oh wanted to read the thoughts contained in that small head right then and there. Whether he really thought of him as just a partner he had physical relations with, or not. If he did that and learned the truth. If those words spoken under the influence were true…
“Forget it. What good would it do to know?”
Seung-oh, who had covered the sleeping Ui-jin with a large microfiber blanket, stopped his feelings for Ui-jin after that day. Since he couldn’t immediately withdraw the affection that had grown almost daily, he had left it there just as it was.
He was sure he had left his feelings for Ui-jin back at that time and place. But whenever he loosened the grip on his thoughts even for a moment, Ui-jin’s twisted words would float up.
‘We can never be together in the first place, right?!’
Ui-jin was always resolute, even in dreams and undistorted vivid memories.
“…”
Seung-oh, who had come down to the training room, trained without thinking. He felt the gaze of Yeoul, the trainer, becoming sharper, but he had no time to care about that now. He just wanted to be so exhausted that he felt sick.
“…Hah.”
After training, Seung-oh increased the speed of the treadmill he had been running on lightly. The soles of his training shoes kept hitting the rubber belt with a thump-thump-thump. Even though heat rose warmly from below his ears, he didn’t stop. He had to run until he was out of breath to erase the unwelcome visitor in his mind. There were always situations that even the mental esper, rumored to be the most skilled in the center, couldn’t control.
“It’s just a work-related relationship. Just enjoy the physical part! Don’t think about anything and enjoy it!”
Do you really think that way? Dozens of times a day, he wanted to rummage through Ui-jin’s mind.
But he feared that if he confirmed Ui-jin’s true feelings toward him, all of their relationship so far, and their tenacious bond as partners, would all turn to foam.
It was like a box covered with a tarp. A tightly sealed box of unknown contents that could be imagined as one pleased, as long as it remained unopened.
The questions he couldn’t convey lingered on the tip of his tongue.
“Even without the guiding situation, did you really feel nothing?”
“What are you running so hard for?”
“…?!”
Ui-jin’s voice from beside him broke Seung-oh’s reverie. Looking down at himself, Seung-oh realized that his training clothes were soaked with sweat, sticking to his skin. Ui-jin, with a towel around his neck, asked while gradually lowering the treadmill speed. As the speed dropped to a slow walk pace, sweat dripped from Seung-oh’s wet bangs. His usual clear face showed no sign of having heard Seung-oh’s unfinished words.
“I’m exercising.”
“That’s why I’m asking why you’re doing it so hard? Did you get scolded during training today?”
“…Mind your own business.”
Seung-oh looked at Ui-jin, who was leaning his elbow on the treadmill handle and staring up at him, then turned his head away abruptly. It was just that he felt embarrassed for exercising while thinking about Ui-jin, but to others, it would surely seem like an excessively cynical attitude. Even Ui-jin, who was somewhat immune to it, twitched his eyebrows this time.
“Don’t read my mind right now.”
Ui-jin made an X over his chest and said curtly.
“Why?”
“Because I’m cursing the hell out of you right now. Anyway, you’re so annoying.”
After finishing his words, Ui-jin grabbed both ends of the towel around his neck, made a “hmph!” sound, and turned to walk away. Whenever he saw Ui-jin’s retreating back, he felt like the words that kept lingering on the tip of his tongue would burst out. The confession he had swallowed so many times while looking at Ui-jin’s back as he slept drunk.
Seung-oh had never managed to let go of the love he thought he had put down.
“…Ji Ui-jin.”
Ui-jin turned back at Seung-oh’s voice. There stood Seung-oh, his muscles clearly defined through his sweat-soaked training clothes. The approaching face was dangerous.
“What, what?”
Seung-oh, who had followed into the training area where stretching mainly took place, sat on a shelf that held exercise balls and said:
“…Sorry.”
Scratching around his temple was one of the behaviors shown when sincerely apologetic. Seung-oh, awkward with tender words, sometimes dispersed his embarrassment with such actions. Ui-jin, who was about to sit on the mat with the soles of his feet together, blinked for a moment and then burst into laughter.
“If you’re going to apologize, don’t talk like that in the first place.”
“What can I do when my personality is like this?”
“Right. Your generous hyung has to understand his rough-edged dongsaeng. Right?”
Ui-jin looked up at Seung-oh with a bright smile. For a moment, Seung-oh thought it was lovely how his large eyes gently folded and his white cheekbones rose softly. Seung-oh’s ears turned excessively red as he cleared his throat with his fist against his mouth, “Ahem, ahem!”
“By the way, Ju Seung-oh.”
“Huh?”
Ui-jin walked leisurely to stand in front of Seung-oh. Although Ui-jin wasn’t particularly short, Seung-oh was significantly taller, so their gazes met at a slightly tilted angle.
“You’re suspicious lately.”
“…How so.”
Ui-jin grabbed Seung-oh’s jacket with the national esper logo and pulled him close. Ui-jin’s eyes traced over the plump lips that were right in front of his face. Should I kiss him? Under the pretext of guiding, they didn’t restrict themselves to place for light kisses outside.
“You’ve become a lot angrier. And only toward me.”
“That must be your imagination.”
When Seung-oh reached out to remove Ui-jin, Ui-jin applied more strength to his grip. If he wanted to, he could throw Ui-jin to the far end without any effort. However, not once had he ever pushed away Ui-jin who had grabbed his collar many times before. They were close enough to feel each other’s breath. It was only a matter of time before their familiar skin, almost like their own, overlapped.
Ui-jin smelled the floral scent mixed with sweat emanating from Seung-oh before giving him a brief kiss. Smack. A cute sound was produced as he pursed his lips and then released them.
“Ugh. The center’s fabric softener smell is really not good.”
As soon as the grumbling words ended, Seung-oh grabbed Ui-jin’s chin and kissed him deeply. A hot tongue entered through the gap between their pressed lips and explored everywhere. Seung-oh lifted Ui-jin, who had wrapped his arms around his neck, and turned to sit him on the shelf. As their heated mucous membranes rubbed against each other, his body, which had been stiff from intense exercise, was becoming light as if it had never been otherwise.
Seung-oh, covering and biting Ui-jin’s upper lip, held up the narrow chin he was holding tightly. While continuously mixing their tongues, he extended his fingers to knead the thin earlobe. It was a spot Ui-jin liked. He would gently caress it with the broad surface of his thumb, and when he pulled the round end, Ui-jin would tremble.
“Ah…! Hey, what if people see?”
Seung-oh silently looked at Ui-jin.
As Seung-oh, he resented Ui-jin. How could he so cleanly divide the relationship between an esper and a guide? And yet complain that Seung-oh’s fabric softener smell wasn’t good. And then despite saying it wasn’t good, still come to kiss him.
Honestly, it was a death sentence. Even obsessive maniacs, if they obsessed, wouldn’t do it like this; if they gave such cute kisses, anyone would shout it was a death sentence. That’s how much Seung-oh hated Ui-jin for constantly touching his heart, and yet liked him too. No, loved him.
“…I would have been really upset if I thought you were doing this with another guide.”
“…”
Is that a good thing to say? Seung-oh was confused.
“How fortunate I am to be your partner, whew.”
“Why?”
“Huh? Well, your personality might be a bit nasty, but you have many good sides too. First, you’re handsome. And, your thing is big and you’re good at sex. No matter if guiding is the purpose, if someone just rams it in stupidly, that’s really tough. It’s super painful!”
“…”
“Your sex manners are good too. You do pretty much everything I want to do, in your own way. Ah, wait. I’m praising Ju Seung-oh too much. I shouldn’t do that.”
The kiss had seemed sweet, but he didn’t understand why a bitter taste was rising from his throat now. Seung-oh looked down at Ui-jin, who was chattering excitedly.
He felt a bit wronged. This moment where they clashed because their reasons for dealing with each other were different. No, not a clash, but this situation where a line had been unilaterally drawn once more felt unfair.
“Do you think I’m doing this just because I want guiding?”
Ui-jin was defining Seung-oh as a good “esper” without a shred of doubt. Seung-oh pushed Ui-jin’s forehead back firmly with his index finger and turned around.
“…Hey, Ju Seung-oh. Wait.”
What stopped Seung-oh’s footsteps was Ui-jin’s voice echoing in the empty training room.
“Then do you think I’m doing this just because I want your cock?”
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
