Chapter 9
“How do you feel right now?”
Jaekyung, who had been looking up to check the floor number, lowered his head pretending to think about the cameraman’s question.
“It doesn’t feel real that I’m here.”
Even though he had submitted the application himself, sung, and defied his mother to come here, everything Jaekyung had done was impulsive, making this situation feel unreal. Every morning when he opened his eyes, Jaekyung still felt relieved to see the moldy ceiling. I really have gone back in time. And I’m really participating in this audition program.
“Is there any trainee you’d like to be roommates with?”
“Umm…”
Jaekyung hesitated briefly before thinking: I’d like to avoid those four from JT Entertainment who make it to the final debut.
“No. I don’t know anyone.”
But since he couldn’t be honest, he made an excuse. Jaekyung had only heard what people said about this audition program after it became successful, but he had never watched it himself. If he had seen even one episode, it might have helped, but his past self hadn’t made such preparations.
When the elevator doors opened with an electronic sound, Jaekyung bowed politely to the cameraman and stepped inside. He assumed they would part ways here since the cameraman would need to film other trainees who were still drawing random balls.
Seeing that the cameraman wasn’t leaving but standing there, waiting for the elevator doors to close felt like each second was a minute. He wanted to press the close button, but that would make it seem like he was eager to get away, so he tried to be patient, though his fingers kept fidgeting unconsciously. When the announcement that the doors were closing was heard, Jaekyung breathed a sigh of relief.
When I get to the dorm, I’ll lie down on the bed and rest… wait, what?
When the cameraman entered the elevator with him, Jaekyung’s double-lidded eyes blinked rapidly. He wanted to say that the cameraman should be filming other trainees, but hesitated because it would seem like he was openly avoiding the camera.
“The camera needs to move around freely, you know.”
“Ah… yes.”
What kind of rule is that? Jaekyung had to swallow the words that had risen to his throat. It was already burdensome to have such a long conversation with someone he’d just met today.
“…Shall I accompany you to the dorm?”
“If you’d like.”
I don’t want that.
Jaekyung forced a smile and swallowed his irritation. In the end, the cameraman followed him all the way to his room before leaving. The fact that he couldn’t even be by himself during that short journey made Jaekyung realize once again where he was. This was a dormitory where cameras could be rolling anywhere, anytime.
“See you again.”
Jaekyung gave a brief greeting to the cameraman’s words and entered the room. As the door closed, freeing him from the camera, Jaekyung let out a sigh first. Since there might be cameras in this room too, he quickly scanned the area to see if anyone else had arrived, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible.
It seemed he was the first to arrive, as there were no signs of anyone else inside. After briefly looking around at the neatly arranged beds, the small but cozy living area, and the clean bathroom, Jaekyung walked in without needing to see anything else.
On his way, he glimpsed a marble table and kitchen, but since he wouldn’t be cooking anything, he quickly lost interest. There were two single beds and one double bed.
First come, first served, right? Jaekyung approached one of the single beds that he liked. As soon as he sat down, fatigue washed over him like a shower.
Looking around the dorm where he would be staying for a while, Jaekyung’s mood gradually sank. What was the person whose fate might have changed because of his participation doing right now? Probably feeling depressed about failing the audition. If Jaekyung hadn’t participated, that trainee would have gotten in. Even though he had a reason to avoid being scammed, he didn’t have the right to push someone else out.
‘No.’
Jaekyung shook his head to dismiss the thought. It was selfish, but this wasn’t the time to worry about others. Even if he went back to the past again, Jaekyung would still enter this audition.
‘I might as well sleep.’
Other people would be arriving soon, but Jaekyung lay down on the bed without waiting for them. The soft mattress pulled in his body, but he found himself missing the blanket at home where he could feel the hard floor underneath.
* * *
“…they say?”
“…when…”
Conversation voices woke him from his sleep.
“Ah, he’s sleeping so soundly?”
“We can’t just leave him though.”
“Wow, look at his skin. Doesn’t seem like he’s wearing makeup, but it’s so clear. No pores at all.”
“Hey, put your hand down. What if he wakes up?”
“…Didn’t you say we need to wake him?”
“Oh, right.”
Jaekyung slightly furrowed his brow at the somewhat lacking conversation. He wasn’t sure if they were talking about waking him up, but it seemed like it was time to get up. As Jaekyung lifted his still-heavy eyelids, he caught a glimpse of a round object reflecting the light.
‘It’s a person’s head.’
Having identified the object, Jaekyung sat up, and simultaneously, the commotion grew louder.
“Excuse me…”
Seeing three men standing in front of him, Jaekyung realized they had indeed been trying to wake him.
“They say we need to come downstairs.”
“Okay.”
They probably felt bad about leaving him behind since they were sharing the same room. Jaekyung awkwardly brushed his flattened hair with his hand and got up from the bed. Thinking he should wear a cap, he rummaged through his bag, but felt an unmistakable gaze. After taking out his cap, he straightened up and met the eyes of the three men again.
‘What’s going on?’
He was grateful they had woken him, but it was strange that they were still lingering instead of leaving, so he asked:
“What is it?”
“Um… I’m Han Chanhyung. This is Kim Ijun, and the small one next to him is Lee Sowoon.”
These were all names he was hearing for the first time. Not knowing which agency they belonged to or who knew who, Jaekyung put on his cap and said:
“I’m Seo Jaekyung.”
“Um, would you like to go together?”
He had wondered why they were introducing themselves instead of leaving, but finally, an invitation to go together came. Honestly, Jaekyung didn’t want to go with them and was about to refuse, but changed his mind midway. He remembered how he couldn’t hide behind anyone when he was walking alone earlier because of the camera.
“Sure.”
Relieved that there were no JT Entertainment trainees, he stood beside them.
“You’re taller than I thought. How tall are you?”
It was Lee Sowoon, who had been introduced as “the small one” by Chanhyung.
“Um… 18… I think it was 181cm.”
That was what he had put in his profile before debut, and it should still be about right even now at 19 years old, right?
Sowoon nodded his head, saying something about being envious, but Jaekyung pretended not to hear. Instead, he looked at Sowoon’s soft brown hair. Overall, he had a thin, delicate image.
Jaekyung wasn’t particularly masculine either, but he didn’t have the strong boyish impression that Sowoon had. Sowoon seemed to be barely over 170cm, about a hand span shorter than himself.
“I’m a vocalist. Seo Jaekyung-nim… Jaekyung-ssi… Trainee Jaekyung… I mean… what about you?”
As Sowoon struggled with what to call him, Chanhyung approached and corrected him with “Jaekyung hyung.”
“Sowoon is 17 years old. Are you younger than that?”
“…No.”
Jaekyung shook his head slightly. Chanhyung waited for a moment, his expression changing subtly, before saying he was 19 years old. It seemed that when Sowoon’s age was mentioned, there was an atmosphere where everyone needed to reveal their ages. Jaekyung said he was also 19 and grabbed the doorknob. Worried that they would end up standing there talking, he quickly pulled the door open and went outside.
“Where should we go…”
As Jaekyung was asking, the door to Room 8 also opened, and his eyes met with someone inside. It was a face he had seen somewhere before, though he couldn’t place it immediately.
The man’s unusually elongated eyes and thin lips looked familiar. Jaekyung’s memory was frozen around the age of 25. So to figure out who the man was, he would need to dig quite deep.
“…Huh?”
Jaekyung unconsciously made a sound, causing people around him to turn and look. The man also looked at Jaekyung. When their eyes met, it was Jaekyung who looked away first.
‘He smiled.’
The man also seemed to recognize Jaekyung, wearing a strange smile. Feeling frustrated about where he had seen him before, Jaekyung turned his gaze and discovered two more familiar faces.
‘Lee Jungwoo, and Yoon Hajun.’
So they’re in the next room.
“Jungwoo-ya. What are you doing?”
Yoon Hajun, another person Jaekyung knew, called out to Lee Jungwoo. He put his hand on Jungwoo’s shoulder, but getting no response from the taciturn guy, he turned his head to follow Jungwoo’s gaze.
“Hello.”
Yoon Hajun’s gentle impression and pleasing voice flowed among the people from Room 7.
“Hello. I’m Han Chanhyung.”
Chanhyung was the first to introduce himself and then mentioned the others’ names like before. Of course, that included Jaekyung, who was standing quietly. Jaekyung remained silent, planning to follow them again once the greetings were over. He didn’t make eye contact with Yoon Hajun and moved to a corner, staring only at the wall.
‘I made eye contact with Lee Jungwoo.’
It was already the second time.
While thinking how unwelcome this was, the man he had wondered about earlier opened his mouth.
“I’m Jeon Sanguk.”
Jaekyung’s head turned quickly to look at the person who introduced himself as Jeon Sanguk. The man with the elongated eyes from earlier—Jaekyung finally recognized who he was after hearing the name.
Damn it.
A scream almost rose up his throat. As if Lee Jungwoo wasn’t enough, now Jeon Sanguk too.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
